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Old 08-19-2013, 11:13 AM   #721
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Originally Posted by CARLINI View Post
Andi, I saw on the PG that you will be moving. I'm excited for you. I know you've been wanting to do this for a long time.

I would love to work from home, at least one day a week. It won't happen here tho. My company is stuck in the 1980's. I hope your work will accommodate you.
Thanks Debbie! Im excited about leaving the City.

We do have the ability to work from home and several people work from home once a week or so. I usually do on the days that I have my doc's appt. I wish they would let me telecommute permanently, then I could move and keep my job but they frown upon permanent remote employees.

If I get a doctors note when I am further along, there is not much they can do. Either they allow me to work from home more often or I go out on early leave. The commute is roughly 30 min walking and 30 min by bus, of which I dont always get a seat. It's exhausting and I am already moving a bit slower!
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Old 08-19-2013, 11:49 AM   #722
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My friend did give me two pregnancy pillows after she had her baby. When I first tried them I was like 10 weeks and wasn't a fan. But maybe now it will help!

Andi- I'm sorry about your commute if you move, are you going to stay home with your kiddos?

I'm still struggling with how to do my maternity leave. It seems too early to worry about it but they need to have a long term sub in place for me so I need to let them know when I plan to return. It's so hard to do that when I don't know when this baby will arrive!
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Old 08-19-2013, 12:45 PM   #723
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My friend did give me two pregnancy pillows after she had her baby. When I first tried them I was like 10 weeks and wasn't a fan. But maybe now it will help!

Andi- I'm sorry about your commute if you move, are you going to stay home with your kiddos?

I'm still struggling with how to do my maternity leave. It seems too early to worry about it but they need to have a long term sub in place for me so I need to let them know when I plan to return. It's so hard to do that when I don't know when this baby will arrive!
Nope, not going to stay home. We are moving to the Central Coast, CA which is where I was raised but its still $$$ so we will need 2 incomes.

It's hard to plan maternity leave but everyone knows that! In the past, I knew that I would work right up until the birth barring any medical reasons and I did. I worked until Tue then delivered DS on Sat. We hired a temp about 6 wks before my due date and I trained them as best I could on the most important stuff and left the rest for the others to figure out. Everyone really has to step up at some point and help you out. I knew I would be taking the full 12 wks FMLA. I actually ended up with a c-sect so I took the additional 2 wks and had 14wks paid maternity leave.
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Old 08-19-2013, 01:59 PM   #724
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Allie when does school start up again? I would have a conversation with your direct report, letting them know you're PG, and what the expected due date is. There isn't much more you can do than that. My work is going to struggle for the 12 weeks I’m gone. I feel bad about that, but I may work very limited hours during leave if I need to.
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Old 08-19-2013, 02:18 PM   #725
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You all bring up a good point about FMLA. Once I find out if everything is ok tomorrow (), I guess I should start talking to my boss about that. I will probably take the full 12 weeks, but will have to be on call. Well, here's hopin' that I get to that conversation!
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Old 08-19-2013, 02:27 PM   #726
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DD80 ~ Has the spotting stopped? Sending for tomorrow.

I’m bummed. I thought my insurance would cover the birth center and CNM charges, at least at the out-of-network level, and they won’t. They won’t cover a CNM unless they with work with an OB. We’ll need to decide if we’re paying out of pocket or going to the hospital.
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Old 08-19-2013, 03:22 PM   #727
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Oh Debbie that really stinks I love my midwife at the practice I go to but she can't deliver at my hospital. It's really unfortunate but I need to stay at this hospital. My insurance will cover it 100% and it is literally a 10 min walk from my house. Plus they have a brand new maternity ward with private rooms and even beds for your partner. I'm just going to make the best of it.

Thanks for the advice on leave, everyone. Luckily my school is super flexible so I'm going to take my 6 weeks paid, plus the 2 weeks vacation I've saved and then start FMLA and return at the beginning of June. Then I'll just have to work for 2 weeks and have summer break. We have to work at least a week so we can get back on the payroll to get paid for the summer otherwise I'd just not come back until next September. I'm just going to tell them to get a sub for the whole 2nd semester.

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Old 08-19-2013, 03:26 PM   #728
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Andi- that's great! I absolutely love the Central Coast. My husband proposed there! That is so nice you'll be close to family. That would help so much. We are thinking about moving back to my hometown in a couple of years for that reason. Plus DC is really wearing on us. I imagine the stresses are similar to living in San Fran (financial, transportation, planning everything around a 6 hr rush hour lol)
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Old 08-19-2013, 03:40 PM   #729
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That's pretty much what I've been assuming is happening. I think my body is just still kind of weird from pregnancy. We tried to factor in for late ovulation this time, but we need to get even more serious about this trying stuff! ha ha
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Old 08-19-2013, 05:24 PM   #730
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DD80 ~ Has the spotting stopped? Sending for tomorrow.

I’m bummed. I thought my insurance would cover the birth center and CNM charges, at least at the out-of-network level, and they won’t. They won’t cover a CNM unless they with work with an OB. We’ll need to decide if we’re paying out of pocket or going to the hospital.
Thank you for the prayers! I had a red spot this morning, very light, but nothing since then. MS seems to have tapered a bit - was able to eat some shepard's pie for lunch, which was exciting, but worrying at the same time. But, it came back in the afternoon. So, still thinkin' positive!
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Old 08-19-2013, 05:37 PM   #731
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I remember my OB at first saying that light bleeding was within the normal symptoms and not to worry unless I filled a pad. Good luck tomorrow!
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Old 08-19-2013, 07:27 PM   #732
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I remember my OB at first saying that light bleeding was within the normal symptoms and not to worry unless I filled a pad. Good luck tomorrow!
thank you!! I'm so nervous.
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Old 08-19-2013, 08:39 PM   #733
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Allie, that's a nice chunk of time to be home with the baby!

DD, I bled for 3 weeks, and it turned out fine. Also, symptoms can come and go, and that's normal. Do you have someone going with you tomorrow for support? I'll be thinking about you... please update us as soon as you can.

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Old 08-20-2013, 04:11 AM   #734
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DD80 thinking of you today and can't wait to read the good news.
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Old 08-20-2013, 05:22 AM   #735
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Been crazy here. My son started preschool and I've been busy with the new house and the baby who is everywhere and into everything! She is crawling and climbing and waving and clapping and just all out fun!!

Hope all is well here, I'm going to go read back
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Old 08-20-2013, 07:26 AM   #736
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Suzie and Carlini! Thank you for the support! I'm so scared. Last week when they told me, I was so positive they were wrong, but now I'm so scared and can't trust my instincts. I keep thinking the worst.

My husband is meeting me at the Dr's office, so he will be there for me. I really, really appreciate you guys asking and caring - it helps me not feel so alone. I mean, my husband is awesome and wonderful, but it helps to hear from women - it's a different kind of understanding.
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Old 08-20-2013, 07:43 AM   #737
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DD80 - Thinking about you today. Please update us as soon as possible.

Andi - Sheesh, that does sound like a grooling commute! I was complaining about sitting in traffic for over an hour, but yours sounds much worse. I work from home all day on Friday (which I've done since before pregnancy), but starting around 22 weeks, I also started working from home in the afternoons. I drive home on my lunch break and finish the day from home. It keeps me from sitting in afternoon traffic for too long. Hopefully your employer will be understanding. Congrats on your move closer to family! When will y'all actually be moving?

Debbie - how much will your insurance cover for a hospital birth? When we were looking at a birthing center for a prior pregnancy, if you were paying out of pocket, the cost was like $3,500 for everything (prenatal care, ultrasounds, birth, yoga, etc), where as the insurance would cover 80% of a hospital birth. We crunched the numbers and we actually thought it would be cheaper to use a birthing center after all was said and done, but it may have been close.
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Old 08-20-2013, 08:14 AM   #738
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Suzie ~ Look into BBT charting. It can help pin point ovulation time, and possibly give you other insights into your cycle. It seems daunting, but really you just take your temp each morning and record it. Andi and I have both done it. A good book to read is Taking Charge of Your Fertility.

DP ~

Sutton ~ The birthing center/midwife cost is $4,800, and the out of pocket maximum on my insurance is $2,000. We’re still considering paying out of pocket for the BC, but in the small chance that we have to transfer, we’re paying that AND the hospital charges up to our insurance’s OOP. This is the hippie coming out in me, but it does seem like the "system" pushes women towards the hospital.

I think I'm going to need maternity pants soon. I've uncomfortable, even with the belly band on and my pants fully open. I've been trying to push it off, so I'm only buying winter stuff. I'd hate to buy summer clothes and wear them for just a few weeks.
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Old 08-20-2013, 09:22 AM   #739
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Debbie - go to Ross or TJMaxx and get some cheap flowy dresses to tide you over until you buy cool weather clothes. I've been living in dresses this entire pregnancy. Still haven't bought maternity clothes, and probably won't. Maxi dresses are the best! If you need to wear them to work, you can tie a collared button down shirt over it at an empire waist.

I hear you about the system making birthing center and home births difficult. It's so backwards, since it would actually cost them so much less if they covered birthing center births.
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Old 08-20-2013, 09:30 AM   #740
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DD80 - Thinking of you!

Debbie - When I was pregnant with DS in San Diego, I didnt buy much maternity wear either. I just bought a bigger size or like sutton, lived in maxi dresses. The weather there was always the same though so I didnt have to worry about the seasons changing on me. Now, I have the 2 maternity tops and 2 pairs of jeans that I had in SD but had to go out and get 2 pairs of work pants and 2 more tops. Its much cooler here and I dont wear dresses hardly at all anymore. No advice about the birthing center, I always wanted to go the hospital route even before I knew I was having a c-sect the first time. I wanted an epi! I hope it all works out for you.

DP!

Allie - Sweet maternity leave you are working on!

sutton - We plan to take off soon after the baby comes so I will not be returning to my current job.

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Old 08-20-2013, 09:50 AM   #741
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I'm having a hard time finding maternity clothes in stores so I just ordered a bunch online. Old Navy is having a big sale that ends today- 30% off your entire order. I mostly wear skirts to work anyway but I wanted a pair of jeans for the fall. We'll see how they look
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Old 08-20-2013, 09:54 AM   #742
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I'm just really lucky to have summers off. I'll have about 7 months at home with the baby so I'm really happy about that. Then the plan is to have my husband stay at home with the baby for a year after I go back to work. He'll continue to write and probably work part time. I'd rather have money be tight and have one of us at home rather than money be tight because we're spending it on daycare.
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Old 08-20-2013, 09:56 AM   #743
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I'm just hoping his book sells well The deadline is right around when the baby is due. He's really feeling the pressure!
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Old 08-20-2013, 10:54 AM   #744
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Alie - That's cool. What kind of book is your hubby working on? That's great that one of y'all will get to be with baby for a while. I can't justify daycare expenses at all, so I'll be a broke SAHM.
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Old 08-20-2013, 11:13 AM   #745
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Thanks for the suggestions on summer maternity wear. I’ll check out Ross.

I’d love to be a SAHM. That was our plan, but DH has been unemployed for the last several months. Normally he makes much more than me. When he goes back to work, if we have two or more, with the cost of daycare, it may not be worth it for me to work anymore.
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Old 08-20-2013, 12:21 PM   #746
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I would love to be a SAHM too but I make more than DH. Not to mention, we live in an area that requires double income just to survive so it wont be happening either way.
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Old 08-20-2013, 12:30 PM   #747
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Alie - That's cool. What kind of book is your hubby working on? That's great that one of y'all will get to be with baby for a while. I can't justify daycare expenses at all, so I'll be a broke SAHM.
He's a sports writer, mainly soccer. He has a book deal to write about the history of US soccer teams. Pretty boring to me but soccer is really big here now.
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Old 08-20-2013, 02:14 PM   #748
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My hubby is obsessed with soccer and history! I bet he would totally buy your hubby's book.
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Old 08-20-2013, 02:40 PM   #749
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DD ~ I'm still for you. Please update when you can.
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Old 08-20-2013, 05:38 PM   #750
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Hi guys! Thank you for the prayers.

Unfortunately, we lost the baby. There was no growth and no heartbeat. I got the medication to get me pass it. I'd like to think it's for the best - I'd like to think the baby wasn't ready yet. We will get him/her back when they are ready to be with us.
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