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kjwalsh 12-28-2013 10:54 PM

Kaleidescope Kim
Always changing...for the better!

Ok, so I joined the "Cut the Crap" challenge and I wanted to start a journal, mainly to keep track of my progress and get feedback, encouragement and reinforcement. It's a little scary for me, putting myself "out there" but I've been hanging around here for a while so I know you all will help me along and give me a nudge or kick in the pants if I need it. Just knowing I'm not alone helps so much.

I'd like to start out with a saying I came across from Pat Monahan, who is the lead singer of Train. It just spoke to me, so I hope he doesn't mind me borrowing it:

Help me transform to a better me
Bring this gift in abundance
Please help me reach my highest potential.
and rid me of any negative energy and
Bring me LIGHT & LOVE


kjwalsh 12-28-2013 11:51 PM

I'm here at work and I work 3rd shift in the record room of a hospital. The hardest part is not the hours but the vending maching down the hall that calls my name and laughs at me as I stick my tongue out at it as I walk by..."you'll be baaaaack" it says. Why has this thing full of nasty carbs taken on an evil personality? I've given in to it too many times. It hasn't realized yet that I am cutting the crap. It will no longer speak to me because I have power over it!

In my lunch bag I have:

2 cups lettuce
homemade pistachio oil & pineapple vinegar dressing
Quest bar

kjwalsh 12-29-2013 01:53 AM

When I woke up, I weighed 147.8 which is pretty good considering hubby picked where we ate yesterday, his favorite Chinese place with the best crab rangoon I've ever had! I let him pick because today I start the challenge and part of that is to stay on plan. My goal is 140 but 135 would also be acceptable. I remember weighing that when I started high school. When I graduated hs, I weighed 158. Isn't it funny how we remember our weights vs. times in our lives? Kinda like where you were when you heard JFK was shot(I was a baby, hubby remembers them announcing it over the PA when he was in 1 st grade!)or when airplanes hit the WTC. I want to change all that to "yeah, I've weighed 140 since 2014". Like many of you, I've lost only to regain. So 2014 is the year to cut the crap and maintain! Let's do it!:clap:

LolaGetz 12-29-2013 03:53 AM

You sound strong and committed Kim. You'll certainly be able to face down that vending machine. I notice that since I've been eating VLC I no longer experience any cravings for things like candy or peanut butter. However I have the strong sense that if I were to have, say, just one spoonful of peanut butter I'd be back to craving it again. But for now I've been craving-free for three months. And that makes me a true believer regarding VLC. Good luck with the challenge. You can do it, girl.

kjwalsh 12-29-2013 04:20 AM


Originally Posted by LolaGetz (Post 16732604)
Good luck with the challenge. You can do it, girl.

Thanks LolaG!:)

I was tempted to pack some peanut butter in my lunch to go with the celery but I'm attempting induction again so I left it at home. I've never gotten past day 3 and I really want to get in to ketosis...to be continued!

kjwalsh 12-30-2013 02:13 AM

It's 3 a.m. and I didn't have to work tonite but the dogs decided they had to go outside so I took them out and not having a fenced in back yard, I have to go with them to keep an eye on the Beagle. The temp is MINUS 2 and that's Fahrenheit so I'm wide awake now.

I made it through the first day of my challenge by staying on plan and my personal goal was to walk 10,000 steps a day and I just made it at 10,0031. In addition to my work lunch posted above I had:

1 fried egg and 1 sausage patty

pepperoni baked into chips so I can dip it into hummus w/cheese

4 oz salmon

I usually don't weigh myself this early but I do weigh upon waking and I'm at 146! I know it's water weight because I ran to the bathroom soooo many times yesterday! And I drank 3 cans of Diet Coke which seems to be more diuretic for me than water. I'm trying to cut down on that but it's the only vice I have left!

kjwalsh 12-31-2013 01:43 AM

Up again at 3 a.m. and today it wasn't the dogs that had to empty their bladders - it was me, lol. They did take the opportunity to go outside tho. Scale showing 145, woohoo!:jumpjoy:

Yesterday, one meal was an olive burger topped with Swiss cheese. I also made buttoni's Smokey Hamburger & Cauliflower Casserole and it is awesome. DH loves it and declared it a keeper. The bonus is that it's an easy recipe to make. What I snacked on: celery, pepperoni & hummus. I cut a Quest bar in half so I could have it twice

Our local grocer had hamburger on sale for $2.77/lb. so I got 10 lbs. and browned half for recipes(we also love the Big Mac Salad I found in the recipes section)and froze the other half. So I have a pretty good head start for the rest of the week.

I joined the league of mall walkers yesterday to try and get some steps in, did not make it to 10,000 and spent too much money! Can't wait for Spring. ugh, seems so far away...One thing I am looking forward to is South by Southwest(SXSW)in Austin Texas in March. Another reason this 8 week challenge is so perfect! But every year, DH and I thought "oh, we shoulda gone to that! This year we celebrated 25 years of wedded bliss and decided that would be our gift to ourselves.:heart:

kjwalsh 12-31-2013 07:51 PM

Wow, what a year it has been! Fed up with myself after years of yo-yo dieting and trying everything to lose weight, I went to a weight loss doctor in January. As part of the physical, he felt around my neck and felt a bump and from there sent me to have an ultrasound which confirmed there was nodule in there. I was soon scheduled for a biopsy which showed papillary thyroid cancer.

February brought a visit to the surgeon, who recommended a total thyroidectomy. It was a little scary, knowing my neck was going to be cut open! But I had a good surgeon and everything went great. Then, a few days later in March, I turned the big five-oh! Had radiation treatment to make sure the cancer had not spread to lymph nodes.

My dad died in April. We had a strange relationship after many years of not having any kind of relationship. My parents divorced when I was 14 and he basically disappeared out of our lives. He came to a family picnic one year to surprise me and I didn't even recognize him! He did make an effort to stay in touch after that. Maybe the realization that your own daughter doesn't recognize you and you have 2 great grandkids hit kinda hard. So when he died, the feelings of being a neglected, lost 14 year old came back and I wasn't sure how I felt.

In May, I had an abnormal mammogram and wound up back in my surgeons office. We decide to skip the needle biopsy and he removes the suspicious mass in June, which, thankfully, was not cancerous.

Thankfully, also, the rest of the year has remained mainly uneventful. Still working on getting thyroid meds regulated thru my endocrinologist. Just got the Levothyroxin upped to .175 mg. I joke that I've seen more doctors this year than I have in my whole life! But, I am happy and healthy and I can't ask for more than that.

Looking forward to the new year :heart:

kjwalsh 01-02-2014 01:50 AM

Happy New Year!
2014 !!

I get a feeling this year is going to be a great year. I'm usually pessimistic but have been quite the opposite lately.

I have tracked the last four days honestly. I used to omit things I ate, like if I didn't write it down, it didn't count, right?! :D

So that was a New Years resolution, as part of cutting the crap!

handbells 01-03-2014 11:17 AM

You are doing so great!!! KUTGW!

kjwalsh 01-04-2014 12:46 AM

Thanks Jenn!

Do you play handbells? I used to be in a handbell choir years ago. The pastor retired from the church and then the music director went to a church out of town so I eventually went to a different church but I loved to play. I played the base bells and they hung from racks. When we played for an audience they had to be moved and the racks had their own traveling cases that were heavy and did not fit into elevators!(our practice room was on the third floor!)I miss playing but do not miss moving the heavy road cases. My favorite song that we did was "Hall of the Mountain King". "Syncopated Clock" was good too, when it was syncopated, lol. Good times.

kjwalsh 01-04-2014 01:31 AM

This is ridiculous!
Aunt Flo hasn't visited since MAY and guess what? She decides to pop in after 7 1/2 months! How crazy is that?! My face has broken out horribly and I want to eat every carb in sight! I kinda went crazy on a bag of Chex Muddy Buddies but it's gone now so I can move on, lol.

They say you're not menopausal until you haven't had the moody monthly for a year, so I have to start the count over, ugh. Thought I was well on my way. My sister is two years older than me(I'm 50)and going thru the same thing so if that's any indication, then I still have at least two years to go.:dunno:

On a good note, the scale still said 145 this morning and I want to hang on to that so no more of those carbs in a bag. I got some chicken breasts on sale and zucchini so I will make a stir fry and still have some chicken left over just to have to pack for lunch. ;)

LolaGetz 01-04-2014 08:15 AM

Hang in there, Kim. Life sure does throw those curve balls, doesn't it?

kjwalsh 01-05-2014 01:24 AM


Originally Posted by LolaGetz (Post 16741313)
Hang in there, Kim. Life sure does throw those curve balls, doesn't it?

It sure does LolaG. I've read some of your posts so I know some of what you've gone thru so I'm humbled to be whining about my TOM. I admire your strength and welcome your thoughtful comments.


“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”
― Winston Churchill

LolaGetz 01-05-2014 05:32 PM

You are so sweet and compassionate, Kim. And not a whiner by any stretch of the imagination. Hormones wreak havoc on all of us. At least life is never dull.

kjwalsh 01-06-2014 04:57 AM

True. Life is never dull! I think of all those that are out there actually creating their own drama. And it's not even good drama, lol. I really detest all the "reality" shows that people watch and feed into all that stuff that is not, in fact, real.

The scale still says 145 and that made me happy because I was just glad it did not go up. I went way over on my carbs this weekend. I was craving sweets constantly and DH must have been too because he can usually talk me out of something, like the cupcakes we got at the bakery! But we only got two and they are gone now and today is a new day, so I'm good and feeling optimistic about the rest of the week.

My usual mode of exercise is walking and it has been to cold outside so I dusted off the elliptical that has been sitting in the corner, ignored. I uploaded some music into my iPod and after breakfast and after DH goes to work, I'm ready to get on it and give it a go...how fitting that one of the songs is "Walk of Life" by Dire Straits!

I've also been checking out some recipes here and got the ingredients to make ranch dressing, which I love as a dip for cauliflower. It's amazing to see the "healthy" aisle expanding constantly to include more and more sugar free and gluten
free products. I have ordered from Netrition.com and their service is quick and the flat shipping rate ~ wow ~

LolaGetz 01-07-2014 08:28 AM

I'm glad you are feeling energetic and optimistic...I'm feeling in an optimistic mood too...I suspect in part because, although it is far too cold for me to venture out, the sun is bright in a blue, blue sky and the day looks incredibly beautiful. I recently read (I think perhaps in the signature of someone who posts on LCF) a quote from the Dali Lama who said "Choose to be optimistic, it feels better". I wish it were always that simple but, understanding it may not always be easily achieved, optimism is certainly worth striving for.

kjwalsh 01-08-2014 01:08 AM

Well, I was optimistic but the felling passed...I think the elliptical machine tried to kill me! It kicked me off after less than a minute...it's possessed. Now you are really going to think I am nuts, with vending machines talking to me and exercise machines being mean to me, these things just seem to take on their own personality. Maybe I just read too much Stephen King, lol.

In my defense, I think imagination is very useful. Recently, I was in my dentists office getting my teeth drilled for what he calls a "bite correction". Apparently, I grit my teeth in my sleep and had to be fitted for a guard so I don't grind my teeth down. Anyway, while he was busy drilling, I went to Key West and was reclining in a beach lounger, not a dentists chair. Of course, I was wearing a bikini!:cool:

I have used the guided imagery for weight loss and I do think it works, if you can picture yourself how you want to look when you get to your goal. I just have to remind myself of that picture when I'm craving carbs - that's the hard part. The cravings can be pretty powerful. But I've been back on track after the cupcakes this past weekend. And the weekend ahead looks much better, weatherwise - temps above 32, woohoo! See? Can't keep me down for long!

kjwalsh 01-10-2014 02:30 AM

Hold the Quest!
I bought 2 boxes of Quest bars, they were buy one get one 1/2 off sale. Chocolate chip cookie dough & white chocolate raspberry. I hadn't had them before and they are pretty good. TOO good! I keep wanting to EAT them! I'm addicted! I do realize that is my problem with sweets, I just can't seem to stop once I get started. When I usually get in this rut, I pass off the offending food to my son, who is turning 23 this month ~ a human garbage disposal, in the sense that he can eat anything and not gain weight. But these were not too cheap despite being on sale and I hate to give them up! But they trigger my cravings for sweets. And I'm so close to my goal. So I have decided that when they are gone, they are gone:cry:

kjwalsh 01-12-2014 03:06 AM

Soooo, I have not been eating on plan. We went out had pizza today and I indulged ~ had a beer. I rarely drink alcohol but being a sucker for unusual names(Pop Up Session)and beers described as "floral & fruity" I had to try it and it was good! I don't feel bad.

My daughter arrived from Arkansas with my 3 year old grandson, woohoo!:jumpjoy:

I'm hoping to get him out sledding before the heat wave melts all the snow. It's supposed to get up to 40 today. First stop is to buy mittens and gloves for them, I think my DD forgot what Illinois winters were like, silly girl!

My Australian Cattle dog tries to keep my grandson close to his mama by "grabbing" his leg with her mouth and my daughter thinks she is biting him! He doesn't say "ow" but he does say "stop!" She also growls at my daughter and paces. I'm not sure if I should get something from the vet to calm her down if she'll get used to them after a couple days. The Beagle is not a problem, she's so lovey dovey. At least until she finds a garter snake in the yard, then she picks them up and shakes them if they don't slither away fast enough. So yeah, I have a hunter and a herder, what a pair they make!

kjwalsh 01-16-2014 12:18 AM

Yay! We went sledding and he loved it! We had so much fun. I found a Batman hat w/matching "glubs" that he really liked because he's a big fan of Batman. While the warm wave didn't melt all the snow, it melted it enough and then froze, so it is now like walking on a sheet of ice:sad:

My daughter is wanting to learn how to make some of the dishes she grew up on. Last night we made lasagna. I also made a salad so I filled up on that first. Tonight we are making a chicken casserole, which is topped with stuffing, which I love but I think I can avoid. I have gained a couple pounds since they arrived so I have to keep myself in check as to not go overboard.

kjwalsh 01-17-2014 02:46 AM

weight 148 (+3)

I can handle this. I've got some leftover broiled chicken and salad. I always have eggs on hand. And bacon!

My co-worker has lost 100 pounds:jumpjoy:and she looks great!

She is having a celebration tonite complete with a Zumba class! I havn't gone to a Zumba class since my instructor left the area :sad:
So wish me luck! It will be fun

kjwalsh 01-17-2014 03:00 AM

"Take what is useful to you and discard the rest"
I borrowed this from another post:

Dr Barbara Berkeley's Refuse to Regain:12 Tough Rules to Maintain the Body You've Earned (There is a Refuse to Regain website.)

Berkeley was/is a bariatric surgeon and has extensive experience of working with overweight/obese people.

The 12 Tough Rules

Be Tough, Not Moderate - don't opt for the method that works in the moment
Commit Yourself to a 3 Month Opt-out Period - you need to follow her recommend 'primalist' WOE with no off-list food choices/holidays from it for 12 weeks and permit yourself no opt-outs
Weigh Yourself Every Day - record, track and act upon the data (see below)
Reverse Small Regains Immediately - in some spots, she says act on a 1lb rise by mini-diets until it's corrected. In others, she says 5-10lbs but vigilance may vary depending on what's happening
Eat Primarian 90% of the Time - low carb with little dairy, watch the fat
Eat One Major Meal Per Day - everything else is a snack or 'tide-over'
Perform a Daily "Scan & Plan" - go through your commitments for the day and anticipate what might sabotage your food choices and have a back-up plan for avoidance or handling those saboteurs
Stop eating after 8 PM - reduces unwise choices
Eat from a limited menu - reduce sensory specific satiety (more below - not her phrase but it's basically that we crave variety and our appetite for familiar foodstuffs is less than for items that stimulate us with novelty)
Have one acceptable treat per day - we are human and need to recognise that we crave some sort of indulgence if we're not to feel resentful and deprived. Definitions of 'acceptable' may vary.
Have a love affair with exercise - she says that we need to become athletes not in the sense of being superbly competent at an activity but that exercise becomes part of how we, and others, might define ourselves. Eg, she does Tai Chi 3x a week or plays tennis x5 a week.
Maintain with support and support others - courtesy of LCF or your preferred IRL group.

LolaGetz 01-17-2014 06:44 AM

Those rules from Dr. Berkeley are excellent reminders, Kim. Thank you for posting.

I'm so glad you are having fun with your grandson and that you got to go sledding with him. Among some of my best memories of childhood are those days we went sledding. So much fun!!

I hope things calm down with your dog. Certain breeds can be extremely protective of young children. My SIL had a German Shepherd who was incredibly protective of my son when he was young. The dog would shadow him and never leave his side whenever we took walks or when my son crossed the street or went swimming in the ocean. It was so touching and sweet.

kjwalsh 01-21-2014 05:31 AM

trying to upload photos but I keep getting the message that the photo exceeds the limit - I'm not good with this stuff. I think I did manage to change my avatar photo!

Yesterday, I took my grandson to a hockey game. Our AHL supports the Blackhawks and we just "lost" some good players to them...so that's my theory why we lost the game! It was a 1p.m. game and guess who didn't eat before we got there ~ yup, you guessed right! LOL We had a cheese pretzel and pizza, ugh - they didn't even taste good! On the upside, we had a blast!

kjwalsh 01-24-2014 11:56 PM

We've all been sick with colds, no flu ~ thank goodness ~ knock on wood


My daughter keeps busy with her homework while I keep an eye on my grandson. The temp was up to 23 today but winds gusting up to 40mph so we did not go outside. We baked cookies and stayed warm! The weather has been hellacious on my walking routine and with my visitors, any other routine I had has just disappeared.

Have you ever really thought about your routine and what you would miss if it were ever disrupted? My DH is missing his quiet times when he practices bass but the dogs seem to have accepted the disorganized chaos that can only be created by a three year old.

Will I easily slip back into my routine once they are gone? They are only here for a few more days and I will be missing them terribly.


kjwalsh 01-31-2014 03:23 AM

The kids are gone :sad:


They left a couple days ago and I'm finding it difficult to get back on track. I seem to want to eat every carb in sight and then go buy some more!:annoyed:Afraid to weigh myself!

Today, I am kicking myself in the butt! I bought all my low carb favs. Got some chicken, hamburger and pepperoni. Celery and cauliflower. And cheese:D

I also got some garlic that I peeled and dropped into a bottle of olive oil. I love drizzling that on the cauliflower and the roasting it. Then it's ready for any recipe or just eating by itself. :yummy:

kjwalsh 02-01-2014 03:38 AM

Heart Health Awareness Month

Challenging myself to climb the four flights of stairs the 5 days a week I'm at work and building up the amount of time I can run. My son wants to do a 5K at the end of May. Not only is he a Marine but he's 6'6" and can run circles around me! He's vowed to go my pace but I know it's too slow for him so I'm going to do my best to increase my speed so he does't leave me behind!

I just took my resting pulse and it's 69. Not too bad but I will try to get it a little lower by the end of the month. I will also get my blood pressure checked.

I've read the argument that exercise isn't necessary for weight loss but the important thing to remember is your health while losing. So even if you think you can get away with not exercising, think about your heart and keep it strong!


renogeorge 02-01-2014 04:12 AM

Good for you, Kim! Working out will help you in so many ways!

kjwalsh 02-02-2014 01:04 AM

Groundhog Day!
Hi George! Got in a workout helping hubby shoveling snow ~ we got another 3 inches. Wish I was there in Nevada! Actually, I was in Vegas last January with my girlfriend from high school, we were celebrating 50 years on this planet! We didn't win anything but had a blast, as always. It was our 3rd visit. We work on racking up our frequent flyer miles to treat ourselves when we can. The zip line in Bootleg Canyon was a highlight, not sure if I'd do it again tho!!!

One of the best side trips was the Grand Canyon. Absolutely breathtaking. The pictures don't even come close to showing the magnitude and beauty of it. I really need to get into good shape because the plan is to hike it next time we go!

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