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Old 05-22-2014, 11:32 AM   #1141
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Originally Posted by LoCarbGal View Post
Congratulations on this big day! I know it must be tough to see your baby having this big milestone, but you and DH should be so proud of the job you have done/are doing raising such an amazing young woman!

I surprised myself by realizing that I'm looking forward to the new season of EWL. I mean, I love Chris and what he does, but I had kind of decided that the dramatic weight loss stories were distracting me and giving me false expectations of my own losses. But I do want to see it again, so reset the DVR I did. How AWESOME that you get to watch it with Chris and Heidi! And I can't wait to hear what the speaker tells you guys.

Enjoy this day! And yes, do stay as cool as possible (YUCK...summer).
Thanks, Carol! If I make it through today I'm already getting teary and it's HOURS until the ceremony LOL
I gave up trying to talk myself out of watching Biggest Loser or EWL...I'm far too nosy to not know what's going on, and somehow those huge transformations some how motivate and excite me... so I keep watching They've changed up this coming season ALOT.. new clinic in CO instead of the one in LA, and all of the contestant go there for the first 3 months of their transformation vs doing it at home the entire time... There are several episodes where there are 2 people that he is helping... This very first one, someone quits the program.. I do hope this person wakes up and decides to keep going....I HATE when people have done that on TBL and walk off the ranch---seriously, you're quitting now???????

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OH that's cool you will see one of the people from the show. I love Chris' show. I DVR it always!!!!!!!
I can't wait to hear what he has to say... should be very inspirational. And well, I'm sorry, but getting to put my eyeballs on CP, live & in color...
The show promises to be fantastic this season, I cannot wait!
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Old 05-24-2014, 06:16 PM   #1142
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So how's it going, Desert? We used to chit chat in the Chris Powell thread. I saw your post over in the Intuitive Eating thread. I finished The Overfed head and it is very similar to "I can make you thin." It all makes perfect sense. I am going to give it my best effort. I am so SICK and tired of this on-again, off-again cycle of deprivation and binge-ing. I hope it works for me. In the past I know it would have. But now that I'm older and have done more damage to my body with yo-yo dieting, I'm not sure.

What plan are you following now? I hope your having good luck.
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Old 05-25-2014, 07:34 AM   #1143
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Hope you're enjoying the holiday weekend with the fam. I saw the grad pics over on FB. Oh my, your kids are so beautiful! They look like you!!!
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Old 05-26-2014, 02:06 PM   #1144
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So how's it going, Desert? We used to chit chat in the Chris Powell thread. I saw your post over in the Intuitive Eating thread. I finished The Overfed head and it is very similar to "I can make you thin." It all makes perfect sense. I am going to give it my best effort. I am so SICK and tired of this on-again, off-again cycle of deprivation and binge-ing. I hope it works for me. In the past I know it would have. But now that I'm older and have done more damage to my body with yo-yo dieting, I'm not sure.

What plan are you following now? I hope your having good luck.
Hey! Great to see ya, J! I loved The Overfed Head... I worked through Diet's Don't Work for a couple weeks, and that was extremely helpful to me. Still trying to get through another one right now.. I can relate to the yo-yo...I'm so sick of it too...but man, the getting off the dieting merry-go-round is HARD. My natural instinct is to go right to dieting when I start to feel like I'm not making progress or seeing any sort of results... so frustrating. I can't wait to see how you do with this, and don't be a stranger!

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Hope you're enjoying the holiday weekend with the fam. I saw the grad pics over on FB. Oh my, your kids are so beautiful! They look like you!!!
Thanks Carol! Yep, them's my bebe's
As for the weekend, they've all abandoned their ole mom LOL.. DS took off on Friday morning to get back for a gig his band had Saturday.. and the girls have been working ever day, as well as DH... just me and my lil' ole self trying to stay out of trouble
-------------------------------

My attitude has been less than stellar the last couple days. Not entirely sure what's going on, but I feel a lot of resentment towards the idea of not being able to diet successfully. It sounds utterly ridiculous but there ya go. I have had a lot of anxiety the last 2 days about the fact that I feel like I have had zero progress, results, success...etc...nothing truly visible in the way of "tracking" progress... I have no weigh-ins, no measuring or weighing of food to tell me that I should be having success...and so on, and so on... Even the idea of knowing that I can have whatever I so choose to eat for any meal has been filled with some resentment. I am finding that I do NOT like the fact that I can't eat very much before I get to a satisfied place... it's not fair....says the little petulant child who wants it her way, all the time. I made the huge mistake of over eating Friday night, and funnily enough, I knew the EXACT moment, the exact bite that I knew I'd gone past the point of satisfied. It was downhill from there.... To the point that it was dang uncomfortable and it ruined the rest of our night out. Meh! Lesson learned, and moving on. But, I can't tell you that I like it any less...this feeling like I'm stumbling around still. Mean Girl comes out and promptly reminds me, see, you can't handle being on your own, you'll always be a failure...then Diet Head shows up and says, I can help you, all you have to do is restrict and cut out everything you really like to eat. *le sigh*..............

So, working on my attitude and diving into my reading to empower me and find the help I need to just keep on going.

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Old 05-26-2014, 07:36 PM   #1145
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Hey! Great to see ya, J! I loved The Overfed Head... I worked through Diet's Don't Work for a couple weeks, and that was extremely helpful to me. Still trying to get through another one right now.. I can relate to the yo-yo...I'm so sick of it too...but man, the getting off the dieting merry-go-round is HARD. My natural instinct is to go right to dieting when I start to feel like I'm not making progress or seeing any sort of results... so frustrating. I can't wait to see how you do with this, and don't be a stranger!
It's hard to give up that diet mentality. Like you, I want to have something tangible to look at- whether it's calories, carb grams, etc. to let me know I'm doing well.

I'm telling myself to think about all the food left on my plate after each meal. A day's worth may not look like much. But imagine all that food piled up after a month or 6 months, or a year. And it's food that isn't missed. Those last 2 or 3 bites of food are already getting cold, and your getting full, so they don't taste as good. 15 minutes after you're done, your body could care less if you ate the last 3 bites or not. All it knows is that it's satisfied and you can move on. I really believe that this will work as long as we get off the yo-yo rollercoaster. Our metabolisms should self correct and once we know we can have anything, the feelings of deprivation and the daydreaming about food should stop.

I'm already down a couple of pounds, but I'm not jumping for joy. Last week was particularly stressful for me, I didn't eat as much, and I took a break from working out. So I feel like anything I've lost so far is a fluke. I'm trying not to get wrapped up in scale losses. I need to develop a better relationship with food. Weight loss would be nice, though. Have you read "I can make you thin" by Paul McKenna? It's pretty good, but remarkably similar to Overfed Head. The author of Overfed Head has about 6 or 7 two minute videos out there that explains his approach, by the way. It sums up everything from the book for those that haven't read it.
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Old 05-27-2014, 09:15 AM   #1146
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I'm feeling those same resentments, about not needing to eat very much. I don't know why I miss the volume. Logically, I know I can enjoy eating a smaller amount just as much. The taste is there. The feeling of chewing and swallowing is still there, especially when I really focus on it. I think that's my problem. I'm still not doing very well focusing my attention and really savoring. So I want more. Grrrrr!
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Old 05-27-2014, 10:00 AM   #1147
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I feel ya honey! Right there with you. Your feelings are totally justified--take a moment to let out the frustration, acknowledge your emotions, and regroup. Positive changes are happening! I am about 2 days away from having an all-out temper tantrum right in the middle of the gym. I get the whole muscle & water weight thing, but REALLY!?? 3 months and nada on a person with 60+ lbs of fat to lose?? It's just not fair. Anyhoo-- not trying to hijack your journal here, just letting you know you are definitely not alone! PS. EWL tonight!!! I'm excited, but may not catch it until tomorrow since I'll be at hydro. I love to catch up on these shows while I'm on the elliptical, it makes it harder to give up early.

Hope you have a wonderful week, every day is a new day!
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Old 05-28-2014, 03:57 AM   #1148
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D- I am waiting to see what you thought about the show last night? Maybe I should not talk about it but I have thoughts, it was really good although I think they sort of took away from Charita with the boy that quit, they made it all about him.
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Old 05-28-2014, 09:35 AM   #1149
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D- I am waiting to see what you thought about the show last night? Maybe I should not talk about it but I have thoughts, it was really good although I think they sort of took away from Charita with the boy that quit, they made it all about him.
Dude missed his first goal by ONE freaking pound and the look on Chris's face was like he brought home all F's on his report card. The girl missed hers by 10 and he was acting like she COMPLETELY failed. They still lost weight! Chris is setting up such UNREALISTIC expectations... After the baseball player guy quit, I quit watching. I was hoping he'd make it.
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Old 05-28-2014, 12:24 PM   #1150
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Danielle!
Missed you on the daily weighers page and wandered across this.. Took a heck of a while catching up, but glad I found it.
Congrats on DD graduation, what a huge moment for both of you.

I have changed my plan so many times in the last 9 months I'm not even sure where I am anymore.
We all struggle, but you're a fighter – I know you’ll keep your head down and keep pushing until you make it through this.
Looking forward to keeping up on all your upcoming success!
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Old 05-28-2014, 12:27 PM   #1151
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jmc305 View Post
It's hard to give up that diet mentality. Like you, I want to have something tangible to look at- whether it's calories, carb grams, etc. to let me know I'm doing well.

I'm telling myself to think about all the food left on my plate after each meal. A day's worth may not look like much. But imagine all that food piled up after a month or 6 months, or a year. And it's food that isn't missed. Those last 2 or 3 bites of food are already getting cold, and your getting full, so they don't taste as good. 15 minutes after you're done, your body could care less if you ate the last 3 bites or not. All it knows is that it's satisfied and you can move on. I really believe that this will work as long as we get off the yo-yo rollercoaster. Our metabolisms should self correct and once we know we can have anything, the feelings of deprivation and the daydreaming about food should stop.

I'm already down a couple of pounds, but I'm not jumping for joy. Last week was particularly stressful for me, I didn't eat as much, and I took a break from working out. So I feel like anything I've lost so far is a fluke. I'm trying not to get wrapped up in scale losses. I need to develop a better relationship with food. Weight loss would be nice, though. Have you read "I can make you thin" by Paul McKenna? It's pretty good, but remarkably similar to Overfed Head. The author of Overfed Head has about 6 or 7 two minute videos out there that explains his approach, by the way. It sums up everything from the book for those that haven't read it.
I need to develop a better relationship too... I have had a diet mentality since I was a little girl...it was instilled in me the importance of "looking" a certain way was better, and then started the dieting scene put on by my mom... I am struggling HARD with letting go of the temptation to jump back into cycling... like, ALOT. I miss the control, I think.
Not read the book by McKenna, but I've seen him on tv...interesting fellow, that one!


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I'm feeling those same resentments, about not needing to eat very much. I don't know why I miss the volume. Logically, I know I can enjoy eating a smaller amount just as much. The taste is there. The feeling of chewing and swallowing is still there, especially when I really focus on it. I think that's my problem. I'm still not doing very well focusing my attention and really savoring. So I want more. Grrrrr!
Right now I'm focusing on putting less food on my plate and figuring out if I'm satisfied...sometimes it works, other times, not-so-much
Not a clue as to why it feels important to put too much food on my plate? Maybe just because I've restricted for SO LONG? Kinda like a power trip, just to prove to myself that, I CAN? Whatever it is, I don't like it!

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I feel ya honey! Right there with you. Your feelings are totally justified--take a moment to let out the frustration, acknowledge your emotions, and regroup. Positive changes are happening! I am about 2 days away from having an all-out temper tantrum right in the middle of the gym. I get the whole muscle & water weight thing, but REALLY!?? 3 months and nada on a person with 60+ lbs of fat to lose?? It's just not fair. Anyhoo-- not trying to hijack your journal here, just letting you know you are definitely not alone! PS. EWL tonight!!! I'm excited, but may not catch it until tomorrow since I'll be at hydro. I love to catch up on these shows while I'm on the elliptical, it makes it harder to give up early.

Hope you have a wonderful week, every day is a new day!
I'm truly wanting to believe that there are changes happening, but it does get really discouraging... after a lifetime of restricting and trying to be in control, so hard to just give it up and let my body dictate anything
Can't wait to hear what you think about EWL...So good!!

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D- I am waiting to see what you thought about the show last night? Maybe I should not talk about it but I have thoughts, it was really good although I think they sort of took away from Charita with the boy that quit, they made it all about him.
I don't think they took away from her at all... they were probably there for hours at the finale...gotta love editing.

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Dude missed his first goal by ONE freaking pound and the look on Chris's face was like he brought home all F's on his report card. The girl missed hers by 10 and he was acting like she COMPLETELY failed. They still lost weight! Chris is setting up such UNREALISTIC expectations... After the baseball player guy quit, I quit watching. I was hoping he'd make it.
Again, gotta love editing.. Also, the philosophy they're taught is the same as what's written in his books about honoring your promises to achieve integrity... (the example given there was for working out--if they say they're gonna work out for 30 min. daily and one day they only do 29 min. then they didn't meet their promise for the day)... Interestingly enough, neither met 1 goal through the year, until Charita did at the end for final weigh in.

Totally called it, I knew it'd be the guy that would quit. After about the 3rd time of hearing him talk about wanting to sign "a big fat contract" I knew he was only in it for the $$$$$... What takes the cake is going to Chris & Heidi's home and practically demanding a car and school to be paid for... I loved Heidi's response....Ummmmm, this is EWL, we don't do that here. Then to have the audacity to show up AGAIN and want their help but on YOUR terms....sorry buddy, door's that way. When you're only interested in change when you think it can bring you something, it will never work. He was just not ready. Hopefully when he's 25, working at some restaurant flippin burgers, he won't regret his decisions he made at 19..

Last edited by DesertGurl; 05-28-2014 at 12:28 PM..
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Old 05-28-2014, 12:44 PM   #1152
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Support workshop last night for the BEST program..... AWESOME!

Also, viewing party for kick off of EWL with Chris & Heidi.

Bruce, was our speaker for the night. He is a contestant on the new season of EWL season 4.. there is not a person with more passion and fire to pay it forward and help people achieve their dreams! He spoke about having passion for what you do in life, to do it well, and to make the effort to help the people around you. He had a rough upbringing, which you will hear about in his episode--being abused by the hands of your own parent--but yet, he found a way to keep moving forward.
He's moved to AZ and will be working with the BEST foundation. Amazing presentation.


No words needed. ♥

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Old 05-28-2014, 12:47 PM   #1153
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Danielle!
Missed you on the daily weighers page and wandered across this.. Took a heck of a while catching up, but glad I found it.
Congrats on DD graduation, what a huge moment for both of you.

I have changed my plan so many times in the last 9 months I'm not even sure where I am anymore.
We all struggle, but you're a fighter – I know you’ll keep your head down and keep pushing until you make it through this.
Looking forward to keeping up on all your upcoming success!
Hey Krista! Thanks for coming to find me, doll! Thanks, I still can't believe she's graduated
Struggle with a capital S, but I also have another "S" that stands for Stubborn
Don't be a stranger, it was nice to see you here!!
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Old 05-28-2014, 01:42 PM   #1154
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I shoulda stopped reading here until after I finished that episode of EWL from last night. I only made it through 1/2 so far. I'll finish it later. I'm sorry to hear the baseball kid quit and sounds like was pretty spoiled and demanding. I hate to see God-given talent like that wasted.

I want to hear more about your session with Chris and Heidi!
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Old 05-28-2014, 01:48 PM   #1155
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Dani, that Bruce contestant sounds like he has an inspirational story...thanks for sharing. Love the pic of Heidi & Chris, btw. They're so stinkin' cute. Lol.
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Old 05-28-2014, 05:03 PM   #1156
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D-I know you are going to be mad, but I know you love me anyways, but I don't like Heidi on the show! I don't know there is something different, I will have to keep watching, but you know last year they showed more of the nutrition and stuff. And like the gal being home with 3 kids and 2 jobs, that is tough, but she did it, I felt like the kid that didn't care coming back and begging for stuff was crap! What a waste of an opportunity! What a jerk for even asking for that, and not wanting to leave home, its like dude home has made you 500 pounds!
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Old 05-30-2014, 06:52 PM   #1157
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Well, I had a big huge post that disappeared into the nether regions of space somewhere

Amber, how in heck could I ever be mad at you? Silly I think the concept of the show has totally changed and that's gonna be something to get used to, overall... Heidi is a good lady, she definitely knows her stuff.. She is total opposite of Chris, she's the pitbull and he's like a retriever Will be interesting to see how the rest of the season unfolds.. From the little time I've seen her in person and interact with others, she truly is a genuine person who wants nothing but the best for everyone.

********

Total crossroads with my journey. While I have truly enjoyed my time learning and doing IE I feel like I need to be doing more in order to accomplish my goals of total transformation. As much as I want to believe it, I don't think eating whatever I want is going to get me to my goal anytime before I die I have, however, learned a lot about myself emotionally by allowing myself some time to decompress and reassess my path. I'm proud of myself for doing it and not going completely off the rails and gave up. If anything, the last 2 months only cost me some time, which in the end, ended up being exactly what I needed mentally. Scale wise, I am sitting right where I was when I began.... EXACTLY. This is great news to me.

Right now I feel ready to tackle my weight loss in a more aggressive manner. I admit to feeling like I want to cycle again. However, this time will be a different experience because I fully intend to incorporate some of the tools I've learned from IE. I WILL honor my hunger and only eat when I'm hungry. There's a handful of things I intend to tweak to truly make this my own experience. I am completely proud of the fact that I DID do Chris's plan exactly the way it was written for 7 months. What got me thinking about wanting to go back to cycling again was the realization through journal writing that I honestly did not ever feel that deprived while I was doing it. Right now my biggest request is only eating when hungry even if that means I don't get in 5 meals like it's written...

What I do know is I haven't felt good physically for the last few weeks.. tired, lethargic, and just plain feeling like poo.. even my skin feels off, and I am tired of feeing tired. I think cycling will help me to regain some energy and feel human again, while honoring key components of IE/HDE. The biggest key will be, is listening to my body and giving it what it wants without depriving it.

I am also preparing to embark down the gym route. I'd be lying if I said I was not absolutely freakin terrified about it. Given that I am terribly afraid, at the same time I have to acknowledge that this is key to achieving my goals. I want to take a giant leap of faith and trust in my process more than anything.

My day-to-day life is changing drastically as my kids have gotten older, 2 have moved out, and here we are with 1 kiddo at home for about another year and then she's gone too... With that, my role as full-time mom is changing completely and I have yet to even know what it is that I want for myself. What I DO know that I want, is to be healthy and able to enjoy what ever comes next. I am terribly ashamed of feeling like I've thrown away the opportunity I have, which is to be home without any other worry but to work on myself. I think I have finally found my footing and I'm actually ready to leap and meet my potential.



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Old 05-30-2014, 07:13 PM   #1158
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Good luck on whatever diet path you choose. I agree with you about not eating 5 meals if you don't want 5 meals. About your exercise, I would suggest that you find something you like to do. I wouldn't do anything just for the sake of weight loss. I hate spinning. So I have never, and will never do it. But there are lots of other activities I love. I caution you not to torture yourself and make yourself miserable during exercise because that stress can spill over and wreck your diet. I've done it before. I work out like mad because a book told me to, and it's too much and I say forget all this mess and order a pizza.

Feel free to disregard me totally, but if I were you I think I'd start by walking. It sounds like you have some gymtimidation, so why not get some workout DVDs and work out by yourself? If that doesn't cut it, then you can still join the gym. Just my 2 cents. Feel free to take it or leave it. Best of luck with whatever you do, and keep us posted.
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Old 05-30-2014, 07:15 PM   #1159
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Great post! I think you've learned a lot about yourself & found some good "tools" to integrate in your daily life. I am re-reading my CP book myself.

I saved the 2nd picture you shared to my phone...great reminder!
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Old 05-30-2014, 07:24 PM   #1160
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While I am terrified at the idea of the gym, I also love exercise when I get going...
I had a gym I went to a few years back but they've closed up shop and I never sought out another. I have a ton of dvd's and while I do like to do them, especially Jillian Michael's stuff...I am looking to use the gym as a source for getting out of the house and not being so alone. I spend a lot of time at home alone and I feel like I have an opportunity to use the time better and maybe meet a few people while I'm at it. I am also interested in learning the best use of my effort while not losing any more muscle....not getting any younger so I need to make sure I am doing the best for this ole bod!
I do love walking....but not here... for 1 we don't live in an area that works for a true outdoor work out, and 2, it's flipping 110 outside already ...so I guess if I decide to walk, I'll use a treadmill..... Inside. In the a/c

I may get to the place, do the tour and totally decide that it isn't the right fit... but I am totally interested in going for it and learning how to get comfortable with being uncomfortable. ... they do have cycling...I've never tried it so I don't know if I'll hate it. ...... They've got a pool(s) though and that totally interests me for the sake of exercise...as long as everyone closes their eyes til I get in

Interested in some training sessions because I have hurt myself twice in the last year doing workouts at home... clearly I need some help with form
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Old 05-30-2014, 07:29 PM   #1161
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Jamie we were posting at the same time! Thanks, I'm glad you liked it..
I can't describe what it is I'm feeling, really. I haven't been able to articulate it well, even on paper...it's just something that I'm feeling, I guess?

I feel like now I truly understand what it is my dear friend from the Best Program was helping me learn when he told me not to diet... it's as if he truly understood what it is I needed at this time and wanted me to embrace it completely.. I'm gonna have to email him and let him know I've seen the light LOL

I guess you could say there is a certain peace about food? Something I don't know that I've ever had before. Understanding the fact that food should be used for fuel is mindblowing.
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Old 05-30-2014, 07:42 PM   #1162
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D- JMC gives good advice, no one wants to go and do exercise they hate, I like bootcamp workouts, and stuff that gets me sweaty and makes me feel strong, I would never do zumba cause I am a total clod, I hate running I pushed myself running and it was so hard and I did like it at the time, but bucket list done, so you do have to find things you like, yoga is another great thing, it is really good for you, you use so many micro muscles without hurting yourself and mentally it helps you focus! I sooo look forward to my Sunday night yoga class, it is not a workout like boot camp, but I can stand on one leg like a flamingo, LOL I am not good at working out at home, I think I need to make the commitment to driving there, it is easier now with it 2 minutes away!

Good analogy about Chris and Heidi, pitbull and retriever, it will be interesting, I love the show this first one just ticked me off because I felt like the whole focus was on the quitter and I do wish they would show meals and how they do it at home. She was a busy girl and they never showed her eating a bag of donuts at home. You know usually the hidden camera catches them eating junk and failing?

I don't know wth to eat anymore so going to try to do what is sensible and just keep moving and pray that maybe some of this will disappear!
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Old 05-30-2014, 07:50 PM   #1163
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Well, that's kinda why I thought I was joining the gym...to find out what it is I like to do I can do the at home thing no problem, but I want more. Me being afraid is all about fearing what everyone else will think of the old fat lady trying to work out. But, bottom line to me is: DILLIGAF ....I am so over caring anymore. In fact, when I sit here and think about how much time I've spent worrying and caring, it makes me flat out p.o'd

I don't think they're doing cameras anymore at the homes? I dunno, kinda hard to tell what is really gonna be the standard for the show....the first episode seemed sorta scattered.. I'm trying to like the idea of the 3 month bootcamp thing

Charita did admit that she struggled here and there with food...and obviously I guess she did as she didn't meet her goals (except the very last 1)
Maybe cause they were focused on 2 people didn't give much time to show day to day stuff?? Now I'm dying for Tuesday to come around so we can see what is up
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Old 05-30-2014, 10:03 PM   #1164
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Chris said on FB today that they did his Carb Cycling program for eating. He said a lot of people were asking about the diet.
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Old 05-31-2014, 08:08 AM   #1165
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You've described one of the most important things IE does for us, and that is to give us a mental break from dieting and allow us to really observe some things about ourselves. And the great thing is, then we can implement some new skills to whatever plan we want to use to lose weight faster. So good for you! You're ready to hit it again! And with more tools in the ol' toolbox.

I really hope you can find some exercise that you love. Even if you don't absolutely love it while you're doing it, if you love the way it makes you feel, or the effects it has on your body, you'll stick with it. That's how I've come to feel about my workouts. I don't dread them as much as I always have other kinds of exercising, and I think it's mostly because I can see and feel real differences in my body - it doesn't seem useless.
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Old 05-31-2014, 09:27 AM   #1166
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DesertGurl View Post
Total crossroads with my journey. While I have truly enjoyed my time learning and doing IE I feel like I need to be doing more in order to accomplish my goals of total transformation. As much as I want to believe it, I don't think eating whatever I want is going to get me to my goal anytime before I die I have, however, learned a lot about myself emotionally by allowing myself some time to decompress and reassess my path. I'm proud of myself for doing it and not going completely off the rails and gave up. If anything, the last 2 months only cost me some time, which in the end, ended up being exactly what I needed mentally. Scale wise, I am sitting right where I was when I began.... EXACTLY. This is great news to me.

Right now I feel ready to tackle my weight loss in a more aggressive manner. I admit to feeling like I want to cycle again. However, this time will be a different experience because I fully intend to incorporate some of the tools I've learned from IE. I WILL honor my hunger and only eat when I'm hungry. There's a handful of things I intend to tweak to truly make this my own experience. I am completely proud of the fact that I DID do Chris's plan exactly the way it was written for 7 months. What got me thinking about wanting to go back to cycling again was the realization through journal writing that I honestly did not ever feel that deprived while I was doing it. Right now my biggest request is only eating when hungry even if that means I don't get in 5 meals like it's written...

What I do know is I haven't felt good physically for the last few weeks.. tired, lethargic, and just plain feeling like poo.. even my skin feels off, and I am tired of feeing tired. I think cycling will help me to regain some energy and feel human again, while honoring key components of IE/HDE. The biggest key will be, is listening to my body and giving it what it wants without depriving it.

I am also preparing to embark down the gym route. I'd be lying if I said I was not absolutely freakin terrified about it. Given that I am terribly afraid, at the same time I have to acknowledge that this is key to achieving my goals. I want to take a giant leap of faith and trust in my process more than anything.

My day-to-day life is changing drastically as my kids have gotten older, 2 have moved out, and here we are with 1 kiddo at home for about another year and then she's gone too... With that, my role as full-time mom is changing completely and I have yet to even know what it is that I want for myself. What I DO know that I want, is to be healthy and able to enjoy what ever comes next. I am terribly ashamed of feeling like I've thrown away the opportunity I have, which is to be home without any other worry but to work on myself. I think I have finally found my footing and I'm actually ready to leap and meet my potential.
Love this post, it really says a lot about how much you've grown through this process. Tweaking is part of the rollercoaster ride, taking it step by step as you're ready.

I'm so excited for you to try the gym, do it!!! Take the leap! Do I need to fly out there and go with you? I don't mean to sound pushy about it, but it has really changed my life and I would love for you to have the same experience. I never, in a million years, thought I would actually look forward to going to a gym -- but here I am. You know I LOVE hydro, I could go on and on about it, but we're all different and you could hate it-- either way, there's so much to try! I hope you find something you love. I think the HRM also helps me realize the benefits of group classes, I don't know if I just work harder because I'm in public or what, but I easily burn 400-600 calories depending on which class I'm in, but I can never seem to get to that level at home.

I think you're in a great place and can't wait to see how you rock it!! You are ready hon, you can do this!
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Old 05-31-2014, 10:19 AM   #1167
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Love love love all of these posts! So much growing going on!! Dani~ you may be struggling but this is how we learn and grow, how we know what we want and what we need to do to make it happen.
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Old 05-31-2014, 05:55 PM   #1168
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DesertGurl View Post
Well, that's kinda why I thought I was joining the gym...to find out what it is I like to do I can do the at home thing no problem, but I want more. Me being afraid is all about fearing what everyone else will think of the old fat lady trying to work out. But, bottom line to me is: DILLIGAF ....I am so over caring anymore. In fact, when I sit here and think about how much time I've spent worrying and caring, it makes me flat out p.o'd

I don't think they're doing cameras anymore at the homes? I dunno, kinda hard to tell what is really gonna be the standard for the show....the first episode seemed sorta scattered.. I'm trying to like the idea of the 3 month bootcamp thing

Charita did admit that she struggled here and there with food...and obviously I guess she did as she didn't meet her goals (except the very last 1)
Maybe cause they were focused on 2 people didn't give much time to show day to day stuff?? Now I'm dying for Tuesday to come around so we can see what is up
"You would spend a lot less time worrying about what others thought of you, if you knew how seldom they did." That's from "I can make you thin." Good for you for your DILLIGAF attitude! I really like that saying.

It sounds like you might enjoy taking a class. My wife used to go to the YMCA. She loved to do spin classes but it's pretty hard on the knees. She took a few Zumba's. She wasn't very good at it, but it was OK. She took a few "sculpting" classes I think they called them. That's where they use light weights and a step as a bench. I think she liked those the most. Whatever you do, just have fun with it.
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Old 06-02-2014, 03:58 AM   #1169
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D- Honestly I don't think anyone at the gym judges anyone and thinks about them, you are so focused on what you are doing, and most people think wow she is trying to do something, but trying different things is good to see what you like.
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Old 06-02-2014, 07:38 AM   #1170
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Hey Dani! Just checking in. I hope you had a wonderful weekend. Have you seen any movies lately? We saw the new XMen, I loved it!
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