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Old 01-19-2014, 11:31 AM   #211
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Did you see those reese cups I made? That was putting sort of a twist on fat bombs. Just I used WAY too much cocoa. They were way too rich. But that might be a good idea
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Old 01-19-2014, 10:17 PM   #212
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Yes I did, I haven't gotten to making any yet, but I put lemon extract on my shopping list... I miss lemon flavored candies and anything lemon!
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Old 01-22-2014, 08:29 AM   #213
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Morning again

194.7 this morning and I'm really pleased with that. Had had 2 pretty good days LC and yday was under 600 cals. That was including the crispy flour fried skin off of a fried chicken breast. I know, not my best choice... But fried chicken is my downfall. I was at lunch with my son and it was on his plate, he pulls the skin off.

Took him for his labs and spent the afternoon with him at mhmr for a benefits appt that never happened. Because the lady was out sick. They couldn't have called? Very irritating because these appts are very stressful on Dallas and a long way for me to drive to make sure they happen, like 45 miles one way. In traffic. He picked up his meds and will be starting the Prozac today.

So the new low this morning is sorta interesting, granted I've been staying very close to plan, but I've also switched to vodka with club soda, I also ate a fat bomb I made late last night, but i also took a LASIX. Lemme explain.

In 05 I divorced my second husband, lots of reasons, but mainly because he was a miserable dick who never could understand Dallas. I moved to Mexico.. After seeing him day after day everywhere all over my home town I had had enough.

I bought a house on south padre island, stayed in Mexico 5 months while I was negotiating the house. Cheaper living and it was an adventure for sure to live in a huge border town such as matamoros. Lovely city if you can actually live there and not just visit. I was working as a restaurant manager for a big outfit on the island pushing 70 hours a week, bartending thru spring break and other mind boggling events. Doing a lot of drinking, a lot of partying, including some not so good things for myself. Needless to say, good Mexican cociane is pretty available down south texas.

Long hours and poor habits lead to Mexican pharmacies who hand out non narcotics like candy, so.. I've used LASIX over the years to get the fluid retention off. I'm pretty well versed with it as a drug because I've researched it. Plus my mother was on it with congestive heart failure. I would come home so bloated off a 16 hour shift that you couldn't tell where my feet started and legs began, there were nights I couldn't walk up the stairs to my patio.

Ok, where I was going with all that was... I took a 20mg last night and peed all evening, the ringing in my ears lessened remarkably, and I dumped over 2lbs of water over night. I don't use it often, but am wondering if from the blood pressure side of things maybe I should. The thing with LASIX is you can over do it, get severely depleted of salt, minerals and all sorts of bad things. The leg cramps are like nothing I've ever experienced. Wake up screaming in agony with your muscles twisting and turning like a snake under your skin.

So I think I am going to talk to my new dr next time when we tackle the BP issue about it. Get a fresh rx and see what supps I need to counter act any depletion

So the drop, was it the LC JUDDD plan? The fat bomb? The LASIX? still feeling the benefits of depo worn off? Or the fact that by switching to vodka with club soda and a splash of cranberry, I'm not having 4-5 diet cokes with rum(ungodly amt of sodium in diet cokes)

Ok.. Wow that was a lot of info lol. Sorry...

Last edited by susan41; 01-22-2014 at 08:39 AM..
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Old 01-25-2014, 07:18 AM   #214
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So.. Not bouncing too much which is unusual for me. At 194.4 this morning and it's really starting to show in my clothes. I think some goodwill shopping is in order for pants.

Yday was weird, slept really late for me, after I got up at 6 and had one coffee I went back to bed and actually slept til 10

I managed to make it thru yesterday without having a breakdown. Yesterday was 6 months that moms been gone. That morning I guess will always be so vivid in my mind when I found her in bed. Smh.

I still am waiting on going to get my labs until I'm off the anti biotics which should be on Monday.

So my boss pulled yet another stunt. He got mad at the bank when attempting to cash a check and it wasn't on that bank and they wouldn't cash it for him, regardless of the five business accounts we have there. So he withdrew all funds and closed the accounts.

I have thousands of dollars in outstanding checks on those accounts right now. A lot of them tied to liquor vendors which is thus tied to tabc. I just wrote payroll checks and handed them out about 2 hours before he had his temper tantrum. I have a very long list of auto draft bill pay out of those accounts. So once again, I've gotta scramble and fix everything. Gonna be a long weekend and a long Monday.
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Old 01-25-2014, 07:53 AM   #215
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Sounds like you're doing just great on the weight loss, Susan. Being well into Onederland is so freeing, isn't it?

Wow, you're boss sounds like a real piece of work. Hearing your stories takes me back to a businessowner boss I had years ago. Unstable, unpredictable, impatient, selfish. The list goes on. I just hope you can extricate yourself from that situation real soon.

You know, you're still really in early days with dealing with your mom's passing. Don't try to get through the healing process faster than you need to. It's either feel those difficult feeling and deal with them now, or push them away now and have them really hit you out of the blue later. So sorry you're going through it.
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Old 01-25-2014, 08:04 AM   #216
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Sounds like you're doing just great on the weight loss, Susan. Being well into Onederland is so freeing, isn't it?

Wow, you're boss sounds like a real piece of work. Hearing your stories takes me back to a businessowner boss I had years ago. Unstable, unpredictable, impatient, selfish. The list goes on. I just hope you can extricate yourself from that situation real soon.

You know, you're still really in early days with dealing with your mom's passing. Don't try to get through the healing process faster than you need to. It's either feel those difficult feeling and deal with them now, or push them away now and have them really hit you out of the blue later. So sorry you're going through it.
Thanks lady! The weight loss break thru (finally!) is really really REALLY cool and such a confidence builder for me. The control that I was slowly meal by meal losing in December I got back in January. That does a lot for my emotional state.

The work thing is to the point where I just gear up every day for another surprise lol. It's almost laughable now. I just keep saying to myself... This isn't forever suz.. Something else will change and someday I won't be here any more.

You're right on the grieving thing, this is gonna be a long haul. One day at a time. Right?
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Old 01-26-2014, 01:56 PM   #217
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Wow Susan, there is always so much happening in your life! I've been busy trying to get myself in shape so haven't had as much time to pop in here. It is great to read that you are in the one hundreds! It sounds difficult to balance your Dad's views and help your son, plus all the other things you deal with in your day. You are doing great in a difficult situation.
I am glad you are finding some ways to work your weight loss plan into your life. If I had to work around food and drinks all the time I know it would be a challenge. Hopefully some new opportunities come along if the bar closes. Seems like the owner just doesn't want to have it anymore. Take care and I look forward to hearing how everything works out.
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Old 01-27-2014, 05:10 AM   #218
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Morning...

Hiyas babs!

Yes, my life is ridiculous lol. But not totally in a bad way. I think sometimes how nice it would be to have a normal house in the suburbs, a normal job, normal kids, normal family and then I realize I'd be bored as hell. It's been a interesting ride for sure, and if I died today, I'd have a few regrets. But not many.

Do, 194.6 today, and haven't lost for a few days, just staying the same, which is pretty common for the big January losses I've had, 9-10 lbs in 27 days. Or......

Is it that I switched back to rum and diet those very same days? Curiouser and curiouser. I will be fasting tonight and in the morning for labs so won't be drinking tonight, and I'll see what tomorrow brings.
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Old 01-27-2014, 08:38 AM   #219
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I know you'll be glad to get the labs done, and the results. I sounds to me like you're doing just fine with your weight. You're sticking well into the 90's, the "2's" are well in the past. You are so right about having great losses and then your body just stays put for awhile. I always lose in fits and starts too. It can be frustrating, but overall, the losses do happen, so you (editorial you) can't complain about that. Great job!
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Old 01-29-2014, 06:26 AM   #220
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199.7 at 330 this morning, and 195.0 at 8am.

How in the world does this work?

Baffling..

Off to work.
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Old 01-30-2014, 07:50 AM   #221
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Couple of stressful days are behind me.. Thank goodness.

195 this morning but I know I'm retaining water, so not gonna worry too much. The ringing in my ears is bad this morning, so just took a LASIX and gonna see if that helps. Too much sodium yday and last night. Been trying to take the liquid ionic magnesium but... BLECK. it's really nasty and I need to play around and find another way of taking it.

Found out last night that an old hs friend passed away. Hit me kinda hard, I'm not sure if it's because of him or because so many ppl are just up and dying around me. I guess it's that time of my life when that sort of cycle starts.

Dallas got a job! working for Sears, I prayed hard last night giving thanks and asking God to help him keep it. He turns 21 on Sunday and I'm still looking for him a cheap car. He seems to be doing ok on the new meds, but I think it's too early to really tell if it's helping.

Off to the salt mines, gonna try to keep on plan, and see if I can make it a full day without thoughts of cheating.
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Old 01-30-2014, 08:38 AM   #222
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Great news about Dallas getting a job! Could the ringing in your ears be from high blood pressure? I would get it checked if you think it could be that.
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Old 01-30-2014, 09:21 AM   #223
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Wonderful about Dallas' job. I hope the meds are/will help him.

Have a great day!
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Old 01-30-2014, 10:41 AM   #224
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Ok... Exposing myself to the world here, going to attach 2 pics. 50lb difference, but it's really not showing like I thought. Anyways, here goes nothing

Except.. A fifty pound loss lol.

This is me and my BFF Becca on July 4th 2013
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Old 01-30-2014, 10:42 AM   #225
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And this is me this morning
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Old 01-30-2014, 12:20 PM   #226
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I can definitely see it! Great progress Susan! I am a little jealous that you are standing outside and aren't buried in snow. I guess that is for the best considering where you live.
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Old 01-30-2014, 02:59 PM   #227
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Oh yeah, your losses are completely obvious. Your tummy and your face especially. Good going!
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Old 02-06-2014, 05:22 AM   #228
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Mi vida loca.

Finally maybe I have more than ten minutes to myself to post. Between last weekends whirlwind and this weeks banking nightmare at work, I honestly haven't had time to even read, much less post in my journal.

I'm on plan, and still on tom and still feeling bloated more often than not. I was doing a mental review of what I've been eating yday and it's all sodium. Somehow I need to cut back on the sodium.

So I ended up buying Dallas a car, so now.. It needs some fixing. Horn, oil change, checked out all thru, title change, put on insurance. Then he's set. He was super stoked, still is. And his job is going well, and he says he's feeling a little better on the Prozac. I don't know about the Prozac helping, maybe it's just because life circumstances are looking more hopeful. Either way, it makes my life a tad easier knowing he's ok for now.

I still haven't gone to get my fasting labs done. Everyday it's some reason or another. Maybe I'll try next week.
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Old 02-06-2014, 06:21 AM   #229
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I was beginning to wonder where you have been! Glad to see Dallas got a job, and a car. I am sure it helps getting out of the house. Everybody needs a break, even if it is just going to work.
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Old 02-06-2014, 06:42 AM   #230
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I was beginning to wonder where you have been! Glad to see Dallas got a job, and a car. I am sure it helps getting out of the house. Everybody needs a break, even if it is just going to work.
Cute avitar! You're getting skinny chica!

And yep, I'm still here, just my lord have I been busy. But it's slowing down some now that I've finally gotten the banking situation at the bar somewhat sorted out. I could still happily kill the owner for screwing up my systems.
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Old 02-06-2014, 09:17 AM   #231
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Well, it just sounds to me like you're WonderWoman. You get it all done. Great job on staying on plan, and your weigh ins have been looking good too! It's working!
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Old 02-07-2014, 07:56 AM   #232
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Well, it just sounds to me like you're WonderWoman. You get it all done. Great job on staying on plan, and your weigh ins have been looking good too! It's working!
Haha,, well. I try anyways lol. And yeah.. Weightloss wise, things are working. My up days are LC and my down days are usually under 500 cal and LC also. I've learned I just can't incorporate any non LC foods into my UDs. I go completely off track if I do. Such is life. I had hoped back in dec when I started following a loose JUDDD guideline that I could. Fat girl wishful thinking lol.

This week has been a wash though, due to TOM and what is obviously water retention from that and the horrid yeast infection I'm dealing with. So maybe this weekend when both have run their course (I got diflucan for the yeast) I'll have a whoosh. Here's hoping I don't blow it this weekend going out with my ex sister n law. We got tickets to go see Ron White! I really am looking fwd to going, been awhile since I've seen her, and been awhile since I've done anything without my fiancé. Or anything that didn't involve the bar. So. Should be a good time. He's hysterical.
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Old 02-07-2014, 08:03 AM   #233
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Great news about Dallas getting a job! Could the ringing in your ears be from high blood pressure? I would get it checked if you think it could be that.
Hey babs! Most def a BP issue, I've been told over the years that I have it, never medicated for it though. So when I went to the dr in January for the upper resp infections and ear infections, he said we will address it on my next visit. I'd like to think I could control it with diet and such, but I'm afraid that's not gonna be what my dr wants me to do. We will see. Sitting here right now for example, drinking coffee, in my robe, quiet house, etc.. And my ears are ringing.

I have a BP machine down in my storage garage, I need to dig it out, but I've been procrastinating about it.
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Old 02-07-2014, 11:28 AM   #234
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Wow! You are lookin' GOOD girl! Loved seeing the before and after pictures. And it is just wonderful that Dallas got a job. Things are definitely looking up.

Yep. Gotta take care of that blood pressure. I'm supposed to be monitoring mine but like you have been lax about it. I've got to drag my own BP cuff out and start checking it every morning. At the pharmacy today I saw they sell the wrist cuff types (like my dentist now uses) for $59 and I think it might be worth it to buy one of those since I don't like the feeling when the cuff squeezes my upper arm. Anyway, I'll keep you in mind as motivation to start taking my own BP beginning tomorrow.
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Old 02-08-2014, 07:59 AM   #235
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Well. Damn.

The water retention thing is crazy, the BP thing too. Yday mid day, before lunch... Scales said 194 something. This morning 199.7

Really?????? Ninth day of TOM, too much sodium last night at dinner. I can press my skin on my shin and it leaves a deep thumb print for a few minutes. I ate pretty far off plan yday and I guess this is a lesson learned. Had I known it was going to cause this much issue I would have went ahead and had the cocktails and cheesecake that I skipped! Grrr.

Ok Lola... Let's make a pact. Today we both take our BP reading. And formulate a plan. I'm having a dd starting with bpc and a LASIX.

Disgusted and going to work.
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Old 02-08-2014, 11:15 AM   #236
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Aw Susan - - at least you know it's water and not fat gained. And water will whoosh away and get you back to where you were...and lower. You really are doing great. Look at your most recent low, you are so far from 200! Your body is just playing tricks on you right now. Nine days of TOM???
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Old 02-10-2014, 04:55 AM   #237
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Well morning, not sure if it's good one yet or not. Too early.

198.2

And today we go to court to find out DNA results for my fiancé and his past. Going to be a long stressful couple of hours and the possibilities and options are somewhat overwhelming. He and I both slept fitfully. I'm trying to be real quiet and let him sleep another thirty minutes so I can have this time to infuse myself with coffee.

I am not going to veer off the deep end if this child in fact is his. I've made that commitment to myself. I prayed this morning for guidance and many other things, like to be fair, open minded, patient and to try to see the good in all of this. And to not be selfish with my own agenda as to why I don't need this event in my own life.

That's the best I can do I think.

More coffee and bacon I think. Lots of both.

Updates later!
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Old 02-10-2014, 02:12 PM   #238
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for you Susan. I know you'll make whatever this is a positive and deal with it well.
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Old 02-11-2014, 07:38 AM   #239
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Susan, you look GREAT! You can totally tell that you lost weight around your middle and in your face. You look fantastic. Hope all goes well in court. We are thinking of you.
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Old 02-11-2014, 07:02 PM   #240
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Another long stressfilled day behind me.

The baby, is his. The mother didn't show up for court yet they set another date to give her yet another chance. Had it been him that didn't show? He would be in jail. We have an anppointment with a big shot attny in our county and have taken a withdraw on his annuity to pay for it. He wants to waive his rights, but it's not likely the state office of the attny general will allow him to, even if this IDIOT of a mother agrees.

I ate off plan yday after we left court, I was hungry, tired and cold. Sick of the cold temps and icy weather btw. I promptly threw it up in the parking lot because I was just a wreck.

Today, bacon, pork rinds, and just now a burger with grilled onions and steamed cauliflower, and rum. Obscene amts of rum and diet coke. I don't expect tomorrow will be much better.

Hanging on by my fingertips here. I'll keep trying. What else can I do?
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