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-   -   I'm Mandi & I'm bringing sexy back. (http://www.lowcarbfriends.com/bbs/weight-loss-journals/802711-im-mandi-im-bringing-sexy-back.html)

squirrel watch 04-23-2013 07:46 PM

I'm Mandi & I'm bringing sexy back.
 
:welcome:
Background...

I have too many "used to be"s in my life. The one I find myself uttering the most is: I used to be thin and athletic 5 years ago.

People's reaction to that is typically disbelief, doubt. As I would expect, since I'm a 200-pound woman that no one would suspect had 5k record times once upon a time. One day I scoured my apartment for pictures of old times. And, I...

I just looked so happy and beautiful. 5 years isn't that long ago, but it feels light years away. I snapped pictures of the photos with my iPhone and sent them to one of my coworkers. Her reaction: "is that you???!"

I smiled with pride. I was one hot cookie. That was the day I took my starting weight (202) and waist/hip (0.87) measurements. I don't want to look back. I deserve everything good in life. I want to be that sexy mama again.

Back in 2008 was when my last serious relationship started. It ended 75 pounds later. He didn't find me attractive anymore. No man has taken me seriously since. I just got so sick of it. :mad:

Since starting Atkins 10 days ago, my weight is down 9 lbs and my waist/hip is now 0.83. :clap:

I'm on my way.

cheri 04-23-2013 07:57 PM

Welcome to LCF.. I hope you find all the help and support that you need! You are off to a great start!!

cheri :)

squirrel watch 04-24-2013 07:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cheri (Post 16390183)
Welcome to LCF.. I hope you find all the help and support that you need! You are off to a great start!!

cheri :)

Thank you, Cheri!! :D

shelby'snana 04-24-2013 07:59 AM

Good Luck ! Keep posting and getting lots of info and encouragement from everyone here ! :)

squirrel watch 04-24-2013 01:45 PM

Day 11
 
I'm still in ketosis.

I had a very hard time sleeping last night. In fact, I didn't at all. I took some doxylamine at 5am to knock myself out. :stars:

I very much hope to make it to water fitness today at 6pm.

My goal for this week is only 2 pounds away.

I also made a list of the milestones I'll be hitting along the way.

Upcoming Milestones:
-185 (no longer obese)
---8 pounds away
-182 (10% loss)
-171 (halfway point)
-162 (20% loss)
-155 (normal wt)
--140--(goal; 30% loss)

Of course the most significant are the transition to overweight, and the transition to normal weight. The halfway point will be a nice pat on the back, and my goal weight is simply the beginning of maintenance. The day I hit 155 will be amazing...:sing:

squirrel watch 04-25-2013 09:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shelby'snana (Post 16390855)
Good Luck ! Keep posting and getting lots of info and encouragement from everyone here ! :)

Hi, Laura!!! Thanks for stopping by. I'm so glad I decided to join LCF! It really makes me feel as part of something bigger. It's the best feeling ever to talk to all these people who are in the same journey.

I like the quote on your signature!!!

squirrel watch 04-25-2013 09:38 PM

10# down.
 
Oh my goodness. I'm a pound away from this week's goal. Sweet.

Today I went to a kayak basic strokes clinic and I'm in love! With kayaking.

Also, the stationary bike at the gym now has to go to LEVEL 14 to bring my heart rate up to 140. That's insane. I kept my heart rate up for a full hour today, I'm proud. :up:

I know I'm crazy, but I really want to do a sprint distance triathlon in September. I know I can handle the bike and run. It's just a matter of swimming. 32 laps to be exact. :stars:

I will start swimming daily, and will post the number of consecutive laps I'm able to swim. Starting tomorrow! (which is really later today, technically)

Wish me luck lads.

squirrel watch 04-26-2013 02:22 PM

8 19.2m-laps
 
I set a goal today that I would do at least a fourth of a sprint distance tri.

Swam 8 laps, biked 4 miles, 'ran' 1 mile. By ran I definitely mean I walked half of it.

But omg, right? I went in thinking I was just going to swim...and I thought maybe if I was lucky I'd do a tenth of where I needed to be.

I'm excited because these feels realistic, my body is responding to 2 weeks of exercise amazingly. :jumpjoy:

Two weeks ago, I got on the recumbent bike, and struggled to stay on for 30 minutes. Today I got on the 'big girl' bike for the first time.

The worst part was the pain of sitting on that bike. The recumbent bike was really easy on the tush.

squirrel watch 04-27-2013 10:33 AM

Water aerobics class today. I think my PMS is starting to pack some water...I'm also not in a very joyous mood. I'm going to stop weigh ins until my period comes and is over (IF I can resist stepping on the scale)......

squirrel watch 04-27-2013 10:00 PM

LASAGNA MADE WITH DREAMFIELD LASAGNE, BELLA VITA SAUCE, BEEF, AND LOTS OF MOZZARELLA :yummy:

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-wffXCIMWyf...0/photo(1).JPG

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-j5hqupPTmR...0/photo(2).JPG

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-a3OlSO2Ovh...0/photo(3).JPG

squirrel watch 04-27-2013 10:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by squirrel watch (Post 16397697)
LASAGNA MADE WITH DREAMFIELD LASAGNE, BELLA VITA SAUCE, BEEF, AND LOTS OF MOZZARELLA :yummy:

And for those who are wondering, yes, I can eat this and still turn the sticks purple! It was worth the hours in the kitchen. You could also make it in a slow cooker while you work, but it's the weekend so I baked it.

I love the way a muffin tin makes a perfect serving size. I usually wrap the baby ones individually, freezer bag them, and throw them in the freezer. That way I can eat them once every other day and not get tired of them. :love:

squirrel watch 04-27-2013 10:21 PM

Fibromyalgia
 
I'm getting all tired and achy again these days. I know it's the PMS flaring up my fibro. I wish there was a solution to this instead of bracing myself and hurting for 2 weeks every month.

I go back and forth between acceptance, denial, and settling for less than I deserve. It's so hard to have perspective when you're winded and sore for weeks at a time. Somewhere in that time, I feel defeated and as though I have no bright future ahead of me.

I'm trying so hard. All. The. Time. :(

squirrel watch 04-28-2013 05:24 PM

I spent all day in bed. :cry:

squirrel watch 04-28-2013 08:43 PM

SERIOUSLY NEED SOME HUGS

shelby'snana 04-28-2013 09:02 PM

sorry you are having a bad day (hugs) Hope tomorrow is better !

squirrel watch 04-28-2013 10:38 PM

thanks, laura!!

squirrel watch 04-29-2013 05:07 PM

Hey peeps.

FYI-I analyzed my lasagna recipe, and it has 7 NET carbs per serving. This is useful for Atkins people :)

Today I'm making that chicken recipe that Rebecca posted on her journal. I'm using thighs.

This is my second straight day of mostly bed rest. I think tomorrow I may be able to do something at the gym. I'm thinking Yoga.

I weighed in at 192 again, so with my impending period, I think I am losing weight after all.

squirrel watch 04-30-2013 11:01 AM

Ready+Willing+Able=Real Commitment to Change
 
The requirements for change are an old adage from AA. I've never been a drinker, but I was in 'rehab' once for depression. I was at a little lecture about patterns and they taught us about this. If we are to truly change the destructive patterns in our lives we need to be ready...be willing...and be able.

I sometimes read other journals looking for inspiration. If I find it, I will usually leave a message. If I don't, I carry on. The reason so many journals turn me off is that there seems to be a total lack of commitment. It's pretty awful. And I don't want to be negative and tell them to come back when they're ready. Or worse yet, come back when you are willing.

Until 2-3 weeks ago I wasn't willing. I did not want to stop drinking coke and ordering pizzas. I wasn't willing to cook. I was holding on to these things for dear life.

I certainly wasn't ready months ago. I would buy vegetables and salad fixings, and it would all go to waste. If I had a tough morning at work, I'd ditched my packed lunch and go stuff myself at a buffet.

I wasn't able to be active because with my health conditions I spent all my energy and work and crash. I was very concerned that if I threw my system off balance, it would affect my job.

I also see a lot of excuses. Just own your behavior! Say you messed up, instead of this or that came up, or so and so made me do it.

Just my 2-cent rant... :doh:

squirrel watch 04-30-2013 11:20 AM

This in particular is off topic, but I've been keeping it inside. Precisely on the date I started this WOE, my best friend abandoned me. 24 short hours after telling me she'd do anything I asked of her to support me on my journey.

I quit my PhD after becoming ill, and nobody in the program keeps in touch anymore. I met my bff when I started working as a dog groomer to pay the bills and get insurance, about a year ago. She was, in fact, my only friend in town. The rest of my friends and I scattered after college or high school. Whenever I need to talk or feel lonely I just go crazy. It's been like 2 and a half weeks. I wish I knew what to do. Hopefully I'll meet new people as I start feeling better and am able to go out more.

Why did she do this? I really don't know for sure, other than she was thinking of getting back together with her abusive babydaddy. She is either back with him, or still pissed that I didn't cosign on her putting herself and the baby in danger.

Even her stepmom and other friends are covering for her when I ask. They will say she's just busy and dealing with a lot, or they will simply not reply at all.

I had to delete her off Facebook because seeing her talking to other people and having time to post silly videos and pictures was breaking my heart.

I'm heartbroken...how do you dispose of someone who's done nothing but care about you?

squirrel watch 04-30-2013 09:44 PM

I'm marrying my WOE.....
http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/...vL._SX395_.jpg

squirrel watch 04-30-2013 09:48 PM

Any of you out there eat out of loneliness? I'm so lonely and I wish numbing my feelings with carbs was an option. I used to order a pizza and wash it down with Coke/Pepsi...

Now I'm just here staring at my fears head on. I'm just letting the uncomfortable emotions wash over me in the hopes that I will just be stronger for it eventually.

landstar 04-30-2013 10:15 PM

Wow!
 
9 pounds is Great! You sound like your on your way.:)

Garden 05-01-2013 04:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by squirrel watch (Post 16402611)
Any of you out there eat out of loneliness? I'm so lonely and I wish numbing my feelings with carbs was an option. I used to order a pizza and wash it down with Coke/Pepsi...

Now I'm just here staring at my fears head on. I'm just letting the uncomfortable emotions wash over me in the hopes that I will just be stronger for it eventually.

You will be stronger for it ....heck, you already are ! You have already decided to follow the LC path ! Don't let the past get you down - move forward and show 'em that you are not dependent on "them" for your happiness ! Trying to figure out the why and what of life events is self-defeating. Stop it! Be your own person !

(Momma Bear has spoken :heart:!)

zipp2play 05-01-2013 06:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by squirrel watch (Post 16398951)
SERIOUSLY NEED SOME HUGS

OH NO! Sorry you were struggling.

That lasagna looked good. Did it taste as good as it looked???

zipp2play 05-01-2013 06:42 AM

Hey girl, I eat out for just about any emotion. Happy/sad/bored/celebrating, you name it.

For meeting people, do you attend a church? Do volunteer work? There are tons of ways other than through your job that you can meet people. Maybe join a Yoga class? Spinning class? Sign up for stuff. The only way to meet people is to get out where people are. You do not have to be alone/lonely! But the internet won't serve the need. Actual face/face contact is what we all need.

squirrel watch 05-01-2013 02:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Garden (Post 16402798)
You will be stronger for it ....heck, you already are ! You have already decided to follow the LC path ! Don't let the past get you down - move forward and show 'em that you are not dependent on "them" for your happiness ! Trying to figure out the why and what of life events is self-defeating. Stop it! Be your own person !

(Momma Bear has spoken :heart:!)

Thanks, Momma Bear!! :hugs: You are totally right.

squirrel watch 05-01-2013 02:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by zipp2play (Post 16403044)
OH NO! Sorry you were struggling.

That lasagna looked good. Did it taste as good as it looked???

Omg, yes. It's great. I've been eating a piece every day for lunch :yummy:

My dad isn't doing low carb and he loves it. I think it's because it's all regular food, except for the Dreamfields noodles. Must be all that fat :laugh:

squirrel watch 05-01-2013 02:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by zipp2play (Post 16403056)
Hey girl, I eat out for just about any emotion. Happy/sad/bored/celebrating, you name it.

For meeting people, do you attend a church? Do volunteer work? There are tons of ways other than through your job that you can meet people. Maybe join a Yoga class? Spinning class? Sign up for stuff. The only way to meet people is to get out where people are. You do not have to be alone/lonely! But the internet won't serve the need. Actual face/face contact is what we all need.

Absolutely! That is in the works. So far, there are some really great ladies in the Aqua Fit class I go to. Right now my Fibro flare is keeping inside quite a bit, but I'm getting out any chance I get :)

windygap 05-01-2013 05:40 PM

Hope you still have some of that good stuff left. I want to steal a helping and the recipe. I bet it was great. Thanks for stopping at my journal. there are so many nice people here. I agree with all here. Get out and have fun. You will be great and stronger then you think. You are doing great.

squirrel watch 05-01-2013 06:55 PM

Thank you all for the support. I went to my aqua fitness class today and saw some of the girls I chat with. Now, without further ado...my dinner!
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-iN0Jk52BFY...0/photo(5).JPG


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