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Old 08-20-2013, 01:15 PM   #661
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Jess! and Tay and Jen

Ew!! I hate pet accidents!! We just had our carpets cleaned (desperately needed) and the puppy then proceesds to have an accident!! Bad puppy! The dog door was closed for 15 minutes while the gardeners finished up. Really? Dh was incensed! You're a good doggie mommy. Sorry your day was so long, but hopefully you're resting well .

Be well!
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Old 08-20-2013, 05:40 PM   #662
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OMG! What an awful day & last night! First, Chloe is allergic and she can't take anything for it. Too young.
The puppy was up CONSTANTLY last night! Crying to get in my bed!!!! Let him lay on top the blanket, but then he kept moving! Now, with my nerve damage and back issues I can't lay on one side for long periods of time. So here I am with this puppy rolling from side to side !
Puppy went back to his home! With Chloe's allergy and my back killing me because I'm not getting any time to rest, he had to go back to our friends. They didn't care. They said if it was too much, to bring him back. I thought he was adorable and all, but we can't have a dog. Maybe fish!
Cheryl, so sorry about Cissy! Seems she has belly troubles alot. Do you know what causes it? I was just curious.
I live in Pa and we have tons of creeks and ponds around. Almost as many as bars! LOL
BBL! Its feeling good to rest!
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Old 08-20-2013, 05:55 PM   #663
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Hello, my dear friends. I am done with work now and have three days off all in a row. I may or may not go to the Fair on Friday but I'm going to really try to go. I love it and even if I am all by myself, I will still enjoy it.

My lower back is really hurting me tonight. My weight has just gotten to the point where my back aches from my belly hanging. I have an apron again. I haven't weighed in a few days but I will do a check in the morning. Last time I weighed, it was back and forth between 218-215. I wouldn't be too surprised if I saw two two's the next time I step on. Enough!

I took a couple pics of the reservoir tonight on my way home. The sun was setting and I took them with my cell phone camera, but I took them for you non-pond-blessed ladies so you can feast your eyes. Actually, the sky was hazy and it looks much nicer on other days but the sun setting was very pretty. I'll attach them for you.

I ate something significant before I went to work and I actually felt HUNGRY before I left there to head back home. I never get that hungry when I haven't eaten anything other than a couple coffees with cream and splenda. Maybe that's just how I'm built.

I hope you're all having a good day/evening. Tammy, how's Neno? Are you getting chewed on? He's a cute little fur-ball. I hope he makes you all very happy (eventually, if not right now.)

Sleep tight! Hopefully one or two of the pics came out good.
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Old 08-20-2013, 05:57 PM   #664
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That is Ellen, our one and only goat. The pic doesn't show that she was wagging her tail like a dog. I love her. The pics of what appears to be a cluster of rocks in the reservoir actually have Canadian Geese perched all through there, but they didn't show up in the photos. Female Mallard in the foreground.

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Old 08-20-2013, 07:18 PM   #665
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OMG! What an awful day & last night! First, Chloe is allergic and she can't take anything for it. Too young.
The puppy was up CONSTANTLY last night! Crying to get in my bed!!!! Let him lay on top the blanket, but then he kept moving! Now, with my nerve damage and back issues I can't lay on one side for long periods of time. So here I am with this puppy rolling from side to side !
Puppy went back to his home! With Chloe's allergy and my back killing me because I'm not getting any time to rest, he had to go back to our friends. They didn't care. They said if it was too much, to bring him back. I thought he was adorable and all, but we can't have a dog. Maybe fish!
Cheryl, so sorry about Cissy! Seems she has belly troubles alot. Do you know what causes it? I was just curious.
I live in Pa and we have tons of creeks and ponds around. Almost as many as bars! LOL
BBL! Its feeling good to rest!
There your post is! You posted while I was creating mine. Sorry I didn't notice it, Tammy. I was so caught up in checking the pics I attached to see if any of them came out good.

That's such a shame but at least you found out quickly that it wasn't going to work out. Puppies are a ton of work and commitment. If she's allergic to the dog, I wonder if she'd be allergic to cats too. Fish aren't much fun. Although I do love my Betta. He's pretty cool.

Cisco does have issues with her bowels sometime but it isn't anything I can figure out. She's on good dog food. It might be the rawhide "flippities" that she loves so much. They are so expensive, too. Damn things went from $12/a bag to now $15. Maybe it's time to just break it to her that flippities are no more. After this bag is gone, I mean. Just bought one within the last week. Normally her bowels are fine. I think it has to do with anxiety too.

I hope you sleep like a rock tonight. Aren't we blessed to have so much water around us? It is a lovely thing to have bodies of water to see and enjoy.

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Old 08-20-2013, 08:37 PM   #666
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Hi Cheryl,
Thanks for sharing the pics Sorry your wt is getting worse. I sure hope you can turn your diet around soon. You have so many things going for you & have come so far. God bless you with the ability to change the things you can.

Oh Tay, so sorry you had to take your pup back. But it sure is good that you found out about the allergy so soon. Maybe a "poodle, shiatsu" or other non-allergen dog... but take her with you & see if she reacts of course. Cats are usually worse then dogs for giving allergic reactions.

Hope y'all can sleep well tonight!
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Old 08-20-2013, 08:45 PM   #667
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Thank you, Debby. I'll get it together again. I know I will. I just am leery about just jumping into another plan without really thinking it through and weighing my options because I've had too many false starts and I know with each one, I get less and less confidant; more and more trapped in my stalled mindset. But I am definitely in the worst condition I've been in since I began my LC journey nearly 4 years ago. I'm not back to "square one" and I don't intend to get any closer, but I never thought it would get this bad again in my life.

If you keep doing what you used to do, you'll keep getting what you used to get. Only THIS time, your metabolism is slower and your body requires less food/fuel and it will take that much longer to get it back off. Grim.
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Old 08-20-2013, 09:10 PM   #668
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Absolutely.
Small changes, nothing drastic will help your body heal & possibly begin the loss.
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Old 08-21-2013, 06:42 AM   #669
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It took me a long time to get back on the weight loss train. I'm down 16.5 lbs since June 7th. Its coming off at a steady pace and it feels good. I hope you can feel like I do Cheryl, soon. I was in the same rut as you til I heard "high cholesterol" and it hit me. Lose the weight before you have clogged arteries and have a heart attack. Everytime I wanna cheat I say that.
Chloe has stopped sneezing and no longer has that nasal voice (like when you have a cold). Poor kiddo! I had a nice nights sleep too. I was exhausted!
Off to make my cup of tea! BBS! Have a wonderful day everyone!
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Old 08-21-2013, 10:14 AM   #670
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Poor Chloe! She was really miserable with those allergies then. That's a strong reaction to a puppy. I am allergic to cats but kittens don't bother me. I have read that it is something in the saliva of a cat that you are actually reacting to, and kittens don't groom themselves the way older cats do. I tend to believe the saliva theory but who knows.

I slept really well last night! Not sure why but maybe it was partly to do with the fact that I was off today and could sleep or do anything I wanted. But today I will choose one room and clean it, preparing for the big family picnic that is going to be here on September 1st. I'm gonna chip away at it and with each clean room, I'm going to become infected with the desire to have the entire house clean and orderly.

I think I will begin with the bathroom. I swear! If I only took the time to get or make closet organizers, my home would be so tidy. A lot of the time, I have things laying around just because I don't know where I should put them. Everything needs a place to be. "A place for everything, everything in its place."

Have a great day, ladies. I am very happy to be off work today.
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Old 08-21-2013, 11:03 AM   #671
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Chloe was miserable. Glad I made the decision to take him back. We'll get fish! I have no idea how to set up a fish tank though. Gotta do some reading on it. I want a small tank with some pretty fish for Chloe.
Sounds like a plan! I'd put some music on and clean and sing! LOL I use to do that when I could clean all day. Now its I do what I can when I can.
Enjoy your day off. I'm resting
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Old 08-21-2013, 01:11 PM   #672
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Cheryl, when you get finished at your place, PLEASE come organize mine!
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Old 08-21-2013, 02:15 PM   #673
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If you go to her place, I'm next! hahahaha!!!!
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Old 08-21-2013, 03:56 PM   #674
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Beautiful pictures! I hope you can find a plan that will work for you and you can stick with. It's a lifelong battle but worth fighting! I'm coming to the conclusion that I will never look "perfect" but am looking forward to being fit and healthy without feeling like I'm avoiding exercise! I'll be working on it for many months, but the theory is that if I can lose down to where I'd like to end up (150?) then I should be able to eat about 2000+ calories and maintain. All the skinny girls at the gym say they exercise so they can eat! Wouldn't that be fun? Maybe someday
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Old 08-21-2013, 06:00 PM   #675
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I hear ya, Julie. I think a lot of people exercise to burn off the food they intend to eat before they ever ate it! Now THAT'S smart. Then maybe as you're munching on the food, you realize how much it took to be able to afford that item and it might not taste as good. Then again, it might taste better! I wouldn't know cause I haven't lived life that way. But I know many people who are rocking a healthy weight do that.

I'm so glad you haven't changed your Avi. I love to see you in that lovely place. I hope you always remember how wonderful that trip was for all of you, and how beautiful you all looked together in those beach pictures.

Y'all have a LONG wait ahead of you if you want me to come organize your place after I'm through with mine. I did nothing today but rest and laze around and even napped at one point. But tomorrow I really will get moving. I make this promise to myself, knowing I have little choice in the matter.

I'm going to toss Cisco's old bed in the garbage. She really doesn't need it and even though I have the largest bathroom I've ever had in my entire life, it takes up space. I think it's time to ditch it. Plus it is smelly when you really take a good whiff and there's no way to wash it. Maybe I'll buy her a new launderable bed in the near future.

This week will be my first working 4 days per week. I don't know if September will be similar to our August schedule, but I have to assume it will be unless the girl comes back. I see her status updates on Facebook and the last one she wrote was how hard it was to take care of 38 horses. 38 Horses! I think she was given the impression that there were two people working at the same time each day, but then I heard through the grapevine that it didn't turn out that way. If she's all alone for 10 hour shifts in a row, 4 days in a row, I feel her pain. Thank God she has youth on her side.

Taking Cissy to the Vet tomorrow around 3pm. I really hope it's good news. I'll keep you posted! Have a lovely evening, ladies. Sorry I didn't come back and tell you how sparkly and dust free my bathroom was after I cleaned it, but I will take the challenge more seriously tomorrow.

Sweet dreams.
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Old 08-21-2013, 07:14 PM   #676
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Hi there!
Good for you Cheryl, coming up with a plan of attack... it does help to do that in your mind ahead of time. Just deciding to ditch the old dog bed is a good step in the right direction.

About exercising to eat more... I know a few people like that... but they watch "what" they put into their bodies also, wanting to get the best energy from it... and when you're fit... your appe-stat works better! Pretty hard to work out tomorrow if you filled your body with booze or sugar... it does so much damage that your energy is kaput!

As it says in the Bible... moderation in all things... so simple & so true. So baby steps in each area... eating (make good choices); exercise (start small, work your way up); making permanent changes that will build toward a healthy body.

Definitely goes against the "flesh"... we want a quick, easy, painless fix. It has been the biggest areas of "learning discipline" in my life...

Hope you have a good rest tonight!
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Old 08-21-2013, 07:51 PM   #677
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Thanks, Debby. I hear you. I hope you have a great night tonight, too.
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Old 08-22-2013, 07:35 AM   #678
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Good luck on cleaning today Cheryl ! How many people are coming for the picnic at your house ?

You can get started back on healthy eating. I know you can. Set some mini goals maybe ?

Hope you have a great day !
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Old 08-22-2013, 09:35 AM   #679
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Hey, friend. Love the photos!

I'll be thinking about you and Cissy today.
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Old 08-22-2013, 09:56 AM   #680
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The pics are pretty! You're a pretty good photographer!
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Old 08-22-2013, 01:44 PM   #681
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Cisco got a clean bill of health! No more eye meds but she wants us to come back in two more weeks (no charge!) just so she can check her eye one more time. She put that stain in it and the ulcer is gone but there is something that may be a lasting scar to the cornea. She said the vision would be hazy through that area but it's way off to the left side of her eye where it shouldn't be any problem.

There was this gorgeous Maltese/Yorkie mix there. I want one! He was black and white and all four of his feet and lower legs were white. His markings were so great he looked like he was designed by someone personally. He was so cute. He kept standing on his hind legs and looking Cisco straight in the eye as if they were communicating something nonverbally. It was so cute. I tried to get a picture but the little dog just kept moving around too fast and then it was too late. They were heading out the door.

So, thank you Lord!! No more eye meds. I can put them away and just forget that they're there. And she checked the records. It seemed like twice as long as it was. Only 2.5 months, not 4. Sure felt like nearly 4!
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Old 08-22-2013, 01:46 PM   #682
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Yay ! Cissy's better !
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Old 08-22-2013, 03:57 PM   #683
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Great news! Hooray!
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Old 08-22-2013, 04:24 PM   #684
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Yay!! glad your furbaby is well again!!
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Old 08-22-2013, 05:37 PM   #685
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I'm glad shae's all better now! WooHooooo!!!!
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Old 08-22-2013, 07:13 PM   #686
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Thanks, ladies! It was definitely a great visit to the Vet. I didn't expect them to say to stop the meds. I thought it had healed a lot in the last few days but figured the meds would continue at least another week. Big BIG news and we are both very happy (although she doesn't grasp the news.)

Didn't get to do any cleaning. I've learned once again that the worst thing I can do is say I'm going to do something. I need to keep my mouth SHUT and just tell about it after it's done. I'm just built that way and I don't understand why, but I have to learn to operate with the knowledge that that is how I'm built. Otherwise, I say I'm going to do something, everyone cheers me on and expects me to come back and report great things and that just doesn't happen.

I have more "picnic talk" underway. I have two sisters asking me how many people are coming and what are they bringing. Well wouldn't I like to know! So I called my Aunt and she still doesn't know if either of my cousins are going to make it. I told her I needed to know and what they would be bringing, if anything. She said she'd get back to me in a few days. This is the person who just had a family picnic at their house, so they "get it."

My sister Robin (not known for putting herself or her husband out) is bringing a cooler of ice and soda. Everyone else is cooking something and maybe putting out more effort than that requires, so I asked if she would also be bringing a bag or two of chips. She says, "No. No snacks. Debby and Nancy can bring those if they're coming." Meanwhile, I'm taking care of all the hamburgers, hot dogs, rolls, beer and wine. Not to mention hosting the party and cleaning my house and prepping my yard, getting grill ready, and all the other niceties. It sucks.

When it is her turn to host a party for the family (since my sister Donna has taken herself and her husband out of the loop for health reasons), Robin will find out how little we all put in when we are coming to her function. What goes around does come back around. The really sad part of this is that they will take the easy way out when it is their turn. It is what it is.

I haven't got a single "family bone" in my body. I spent 15 years of my life either half way across the country or 3/4 of the way across the country. I have learned that there is life beyond family. Being back here and getting caught up in all the dysfunction is not making me happy that my sister Donna has decided that she's done being the head of the family.

I can see the writing on the wall. Family functions are about to become very few and far between. And I'm actually fine with that. I'll do my part, but if a Thanksgiving goes by and we don't all gather together around the table, I won't worry too much about it. I'll just make a little dinner for my Mom and Donna and her husband, if they are even still in CT for that time frame. The others can have their own dinners with their own "chicks" and keep it small and private.

This post is going to be huge and not too inspiring so I will end it here. I am in a very introspective period in my life and this is just one of the realizations I'm coming to. What do I want to be? WHERE do I want to be? And what do I want from others? What am I willing to give and what do I want and expect in return? Who do I really need in my "circle of trust" anyway?

I miss moving around and meeting strangers. I miss that time when you are completely new to someone and they are completely new to you. They don't know where you've been or what you've done in your life, they only see what you present in that moment. You get a fresh start with each move. I really miss that. That opportunity to be someone "fresh and new". I'm caught up in the staleness of being planted here with family in a state that I never enjoyed living in. I am stuck.

I swore when I left here at 24 that I'd NEVER move back. I'd come home to visit once or twice a year, but I was done being a part of the family fold. If they were stupid enough to stay here, that was their problem. (I know I sound like a completely horrible person at this point, but it's coming out of me and I have to let it.)

I need to get my life back on track! I need to get back to nursing and making money and having options and choices and the ability to move around. Why do I limit myself so? WHY? What am I gaining by being the weak person? Why have I settled for so little?

Why?
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Old 08-23-2013, 12:21 PM   #687
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Hi Cheryl,

Darling you have choices and plenty of opportunities around. Your imagination in limitless. Do you want to go on a trip. Plan it and tell no one....I actually read an article on LinkedIn called "Shut up and Do it"-not sure if that was the exact title but the purpose was to tell people to stop talking about what they want to do and just do it. The premise was a person wanting to train for a marathon. He/She received the praise and acknowledgment once they told others the plans for training for the marathon which defeated the desire to train. It is almost as if our brains get the recognition and the drive to complete the goal is gone. It's an interesting theory. So I will leave you with this.

Shhhhh...don't tell what your goals are. Keep them private for a while. Keep coming here and tell us about life and never limit yourself again

I heart you Cheryl...be sweet as you always are
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Old 08-23-2013, 07:11 PM   #688
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Hi Cheryl,

Darling you have choices and plenty of opportunities around. Your imagination in limitless. Do you want to go on a trip. Plan it and tell no one....I actually read an article on LinkedIn called "Shut up and Do it"-not sure if that was the exact title but the purpose was to tell people to stop talking about what they want to do and just do it. The premise was a person wanting to train for a marathon. He/She received the praise and acknowledgment once they told others the plans for training for the marathon which defeated the desire to train. It is almost as if our brains get the recognition and the drive to complete the goal is gone. It's an interesting theory. So I will leave you with this.

Shhhhh...don't tell what your goals are. Keep them private for a while. Keep coming here and tell us about life and never limit yourself again

I heart you Cheryl...be sweet as you always are
^^^^^ Precisely!!!! That is what I'm talking about. The reason why I should stop talking! Thank you for your post and thank you for listening.

I am feeling okay and I thank you for responding. I realize that when I write things like I wrote yesterday that it isn't always easy knowing what to say. I thought there wasn't going to be a reply and I am thankful that I got one.

PS: Robin offered to bring some chips to the picnic. Life is good.
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Old 08-23-2013, 07:16 PM   #689
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I need to get my life back on track! I need to get back to nursing and making money and having options and choices and the ability to move around. ~~

Sorry Cheryl, I did mean to reply ~ I hope you don't feel like you can't set goals and achieve them. i Know you CAN !!

I know all about living somewhere that you don't want to be. ;/ I would love to live somewhere with 4 seasons, maybe a beach, etc........ it's not fun knowing you are stuck. I am too.......

Prayers for you and will pray that you will have inspiration and peace as you figure out what you want to do with the rest of your life You have many years left to enjoy life PTL !!
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Old 08-23-2013, 08:15 PM   #690
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I read your post earlier, but having Chloe since 9:30 a.m. til she finally went to sleep at 10:30 p.m. leaves little time to reply. I always wind up cutting my post short!
I think whatever you decide to do, is right for you. Only you know what that is. I'm sure we all will support you no matter what. I sometimes don't "talk" much about my weight. Kinda for the same reasons you think you shouldn't. It kinda jinxs me. So for the most part, I keep my mouth shut! It took alot to post my weight for everyone to see it. You'll do fine.
Like I said earlier, I had Chloe all day. My dd was home for a quick minute to change clothes and she was gone. She went to her bf's sister's Birthday dinner then they were going somewhere afterwards. I get to sleep in some in the morning since she works at 11. Whoopeeee!
Well, I'm beat, ttyt.
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