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leighleighbuggy 12-26-2012 01:36 PM

leighleigh's journal
This is the beginning of what I hope to be a success. I began a struggle with weight in my teenage years. Honestly, I wasn't really overweight 5'3 and 135lbs, but I was bigger than several of my friends. I also had a super skinny mother who was obsessed with low fat eating and aerobics. There were a lot of comments, etc, and I know they all have some affect on my relationship with food.

I stayed around 135-155 for most of my teens and early twenties. However, at age 22, I was able to get down to 125 by going vegetarian and eating low calorie-about 1200 calories a day. I was also biking most days of the week, running several miles and dancing for hours on weekend nights.

At age 25, I became pregnant with my first son. I gained 40 lbs. I lost 20 lbs, and when my son was 4 months old, I got pregnant again. Had ds2 and lost all the weight with him. I stayed at about 150lbs for several years. No major dieting, continued eating vegetarian. No real exercise, other than chasing after to little boys.

At age 28, I got pregnant again. I carried that baby for four months and then miscarried. I did not lose the 10 lbs I gained from that pregnancy. 3 months after my miscarriage, I got pregnant again. Carried full term and got up to 205 lbs. That number was so shocking to me at the time. Had that baby and got down to 165 lbs.

When ds3 was about 18 months old, I stopped breastfeeding him. Since, then, in about a year, I have gained 35 lbs. It has come on in increments. Usually 5-10 lbs at a time.

I have eaten very low calorie (800 calories), exercised 2 hours a day (weights and cardio) and nothing is really working. Desperately, I went to see a doctor and have tests run. Luckily, my thyroid is ok. She diagnosed me with insulin resistance and metabolic syndrome. Also, with PCOS.

I am pretty miserable here at 200 lbs. I have never been this heavy in my life. I feel I am in someone else's body. I weigh more than I did the day I gave birth to my first two sons, and almost as much as I did the day I had my third son! I don't want my boys growing up with a fat mom.

Overall, my husband has been pretty great about my weight. He has never said one word about it, but let's face it, I am sure he wishes my body looked more like it did when we got married. I am okay with never being 125 lbs again. I am in my mid thirties now. I actually was pretty comfortable at 150 lbs. I was a size 8-10 and pretty happy their. I am setting that as my goal for now.

It is not super easy for me to eat this way, having spent years as a vegetarian. I am not 100% opposed to eating meat, but it will not be a huge part of what I eat. I do not care for a lot of meat, and find the texture a bit unappealing. Some things I do ok with though, like sliced turkey, grilled chicken, and fish/seafood. I also do fine with eggs and dairy.

For the past several days, I have been eating this roughly:

coffee with 1 tbs heavy cream

lunch- salad with olives cheese and ranch or italian dressing

dinner- varies- sometimes another salad, sometimes a broiled crab cake, sometimes a low carb tortilla with grilled chicken and veggies.

I am aiming for 50 carbs and hoping I can lose on that. If not I will drop down to 20 but I feel like that may be hard for me to stick to, because I don't like meat very much.

mcelromi1 01-15-2013 01:01 PM

How everything going?

leighleighbuggy 07-07-2013 05:37 AM

Well, I have not been on here, I found out I was pregnant, NOT planned. I was on birth control. Unfortunately, that ended up in miscarriage and I have been in and out of the hospital/dr's. Weight loss was put on the back burner, and I have been eating whatever is convenient. I have just had a normal cycle and feeling back to myself, so I am ready to jump back on the bandwagon. Today I weighed in at 195.8

leighleighbuggy 07-08-2013 04:53 PM

Yesterday went well. I wound up working out at the Y with dh and then we took the three kids swimming afterwards. Was a nice day. I can't wait until I feel better about walking around in a bathing suit though. I brought string cheese and that held me over until we got home and grilled burgers and hot dogs for the kids. I weighed in again at 195.8 this morning, but no gain eh?
Today I cut the grass and took the kids in the pool. We also took a short walk this evening. I made ground beef for dinner and will have that with lettuce/tomato/guac. Total carb count for today is about 30 grams.

leighleighbuggy 07-09-2013 04:09 PM

Up a little today, I think it is due to TOM. 196.3 I ate 22 carbs today. Didn't work out but cleaned a lot. I am feeling great.

leighleighbuggy 07-10-2013 08:08 AM

196.7 today, hoping it's due to TOM still. Trying not to stress over the small numbers.

leighleighbuggy 07-11-2013 04:03 PM

Down to 195.3 today. Feeling encouraged by that. I have eaten about 10 carbs so far. I will end up under 20 today.

leighleighbuggy 07-12-2013 06:59 AM

weighed in at 196.0 today. I am still on my cycle. I am still feeling great. I started at 198.6 so I am still down a little. Hoping next week I will see better numbers. I am still happy with 2.6 lbs/week though!

leighleighbuggy 07-13-2013 07:52 AM

Down to 193.8 today, but that may be partly due to dehydration. I had a couple glasses of wine last night. 10 carbs total, but I ate really well, so ended up below 30 carbs.

leighleighbuggy 07-13-2013 02:53 PM

Started thinking about different goals. I am breaking them up to help me mentally with the weight loss, so I don't feel so overwhelmed with all the weight I need to lose.

187- first goal/ last weight I was before I got "stuck" in the high 190's

175- weight when I weaned my 3rd son. Wearing size 12's at this point.

165- weight I was after I had my 3rd son. I was in 10's and 12's here I think.

155- weight I was after having my first two sons. My body seems to really like this weight for some reason. Size 8-10 here. This would be an okay goal for me too. not sure yet. When I get to this weight I want to have family pictures done.

135- Wedding weight.

125- lowest weight I remember being. I don't even know if I want to be this thin, but we will see.

leighleighbuggy 07-14-2013 12:58 PM

195.3 Today. Feeling like my loss is pretty steady so far.

leighleighbuggy 07-15-2013 08:03 AM

195.3 again lol! hoping to see a lower number tomorrow!

leighleighbuggy 07-16-2013 06:33 AM

Yesterday weighed in at 194.2, but today am up to 195.5. Trying not to discouraged by the ups and downs. I am sure being on my cycle is making things more confusing. Also, I usually gain a bit before a whoosh, so that is what I am hoping for this week. We will see. My eating is going really well. Most days staying around 20ish carbs, had a couple days around 40, but overall, no real mess ups.

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