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Old 02-17-2013, 06:11 AM   #151
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I made it to the 75 pound club!!!

It has been two weeks of measuring and recording my food and here are the stats:

Week One
Daily Average Carbs = 42
Days of Exercise = 4
Weight Loss = 3 pounds

Week Two
Daily Average Carbs = 41
Days of Exercise = 3
Weight Loss = 2 pounds

To fall into that carb average, I had some days as low as 30 carbs and some as high as 60. I am very comfortable with this! It is such a relief to be losing again while eating in a sustainable, enjoyable way.

Now that I have hit that 75 pound club goal, my attention is being shifted to that epic, magical place called onederland. It is only 8 pounds away!

Today is shopping and prep cooking. I have already written out my plans in my food journal. Here is a summary:

B- Toasted Onion Flax Crumpet with butter & cream cheese (6 carbs)
L- Italian Chop Suey (6 carbs)
D- Protein and vegetable
S- Sweet treat

Since I have been feeling a bit of hunger during the day, I settled on trying a more substantial lunch. I chose the Chop Suey bowl because I can heat it up (and hot food tends to satiate me more than cold food) and because each serving will contain a quarter pound of ground beef. I already researched all of the portions and ingredients to get an accurate carb count. First I'll brown the beef with diced green peppers and then add no sugar added marinara sauce. I will line up my small, round Tupperware containers and place 1/8 cup of ricotta in the bottom of each one. Then the Chop Suey on top and finished with 1 TBLS of grated parmesan cheese. At work I will simply pop it in the microwave and then stir and eat. Yum!

If this higher fat, hot meal doesn't change the afternoon hunger issues I've had, next week I will try introducing several smaller feedings through the day. Since I sometimes have trouble even getting to eat one lunch, I worry about trying to make time for two or three snacks throughout the workday. That's why I'm going the Chop Suey route first.

OK, I'm making my list, checking it twice, and heading out to the grocery store so I can begin cooking.
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Old 02-17-2013, 05:47 PM   #152
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Congratulations!!!!!!! And you did it before your ‘Atkins’versary on the 28th!

Welcome to the 75 lb. club. We have been saving a seat for you.

Your food sounds great. If I am not satisfied with the foods or portions, I can get off track. So your plan sounds good. I like it that I now eat more calories than when in losing mode. It is great!

KUTGW!! I am so proud of you.

Is your hubby here now or still in England? When will you be moving there? I know you have to finish the school year.
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Old 02-22-2013, 07:33 AM   #153
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Originally Posted by NWLoser View Post
Is your hubby here now or still in England? When will you be moving there? I know you have to finish the school year.
Thanks for the welcome to the 75 pound club Dianne. DH is back in Florida as we liquidate our assets and sort through all of the logistics of our relocation. We have a ‘soft’ departure date for June. We are both feeling flexible about that and are more concerned with selling what we can’t take (we aren’t taking much!).

We’ve started on etsy, eBay, and craigslist. A few garage sales will probably be needed as well. We have sold one of our two vehicles already and will sell the last one right before we go. Luckily we rent, so I don’t have to coordinate the sale of a house! If we get it all sold quick, we will entertain leaving early. If it takes more time than that, we can stay as late as August (I can work summer school straight through to the end of July if I want). So we are going with the flow.

Some possible good news related to the big move; I may be able to remain employed at my school in the capacity of an online instructor for ESOL and/or GED for a while after the move. Fingers crossed that all the ducks end up in a row for that opportunity. The thought of having a job (and a paycheck!) right out of the gate is very appealing. Although DH has assured me I don’t need to think about working while we wait for my work permits, I am a worker bee and will go crazy. I need to earn money to feel independent. Also, I would love the chance to add an online instructor component to my resume as it is definitely the way education is moving in the future.

I haven’t been as active with my online journal this week but I have been diligently measuring and recording my meals, water, and exercise in my notebook journal. I’ve stayed within my carb range, though on the higher end of things (still feeling a bit hungrier). Next week I will definitely split my lunch into two meals which will make my daily food schedule look somewhat like this:

Breakfast- 6:30 AM
Snack- 10:30 AM
Lunch- 2:00 PM
Snack- (coffee after work, time varies)
Dinner- 7:00 PM
Snack- 8:30 PM

I made wings myself at home last night for the very first time. I always buy them cooked when I am in the mood, but I saw a big bag of frozen ones the last time I went grocery shopping. Ding, ding, ding!!!! We have a winner! How on Earth have I managed to LC all this time without making wings?

I will spend this weekend searching tons of wing recipes to experiment with although last night I was satisfied with a simply coating of basic seasonings. Wings would make a great zero carb lunch option... if I use egg salad as my mid-morning snack, I should be satisfied all day while keeping it strictly protein and fat. Yay! I love new discoveries.
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Old 02-23-2013, 08:59 AM   #154
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I am so grateful that I started my food journal. It has provided me with so much information about my habits and it is helping me really zero in on how to manage my food choices for the rest of my life!

After reviewing the last three weeks of nutrition, I have decided to make a few adjustments to ensure I keep to a healthy carb range while feeling satisfied with my meals and snacks.

First, I want to reduce the carbs I 'spend' on my coffee. Currently, I add 2 Splenda packets and 2 TBLS of half & half for a total of 3 carbs. Since I allow myself two coffees a day, I am using up 6 of my daily carbs just on two beverages (not to mention the fact that I drink 4-6 cups of coffee on the weekends!... up to 18 carbs!!).

Starting this morning, I have changed the way I fix my coffee. I now add only 1 TBLS of half & half and 1 TBLS of SF Torani sweetener for a total of 1 carb per coffee. That will allow me to shave off 4 carbs a day on weekdays and up to 12 carbs on the weekends. I am having to adjust a little to the taste, but I know in a few days I will be used to it. It is still enjoyable and actually allows me to add variety with a few different flavors (I had vanilla this morning and am sipping raspberry now). Also, on the days I do indulge in an extra cuppa' I am still below the carb count I would have blown on just one previously. When I go shopping, I may browse other liquid zero carb sweeteners to experiment with.

Another adjustment, splitting my feedings at work into two and making them VLC. My at work lunches have had a carb count of as much as 8 carbs. This week I am going to have a snack of egg salad and a lunch of chicken wings. This shaves another chunk of carbs out of my day while actually increasing my food.

So by just tweaking a little with my coffee and my lunch, I am lowering my daily carb count each day by approximately 10! I plan to keep my breakfast, dinner, and snack carbs about the same since these feedings have been nutritious and satisfying and in a respectable carb range, IMHO.

Here is this week's food plan:

B- Caramel Pecan Flax Cake with butter and coffee (9 carbs)
S- One egg salad with extra mayo (1 carb)
L- Dana Carpenter's Heroin Wings (1 carb)
S- Coffee (1 carb)
D- Protein and vegetable (12 carbs)
S- Evening snack (10 carbs)

Total carbs = 34 (and that's not 'net carbs'... It's the real deal.)

Sometimes my evening snack in as low as 4 carbs (an ounce of nuts), but other nights I might enjoy something as carby as ricotta, nuts, syrup, and chocolate and this means I go as high as 10. I allotted the higher end in my weekly plan so that I don't feel 'bad' or 'naughty' on the days I choose the higher carb option. The mind game is as important as the nutrition for my long term success. Glad I know that now!
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Old 02-24-2013, 02:55 PM   #155
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Since my measuring and recording began, here are the stats:

Week One
Daily Average Carbs = 42
Days of Exercise = 4
Weight Loss = 3 pounds

Week Two
Daily Average Carbs = 41
Days of Exercise = 3
Weight Loss = 2 pounds

Week Three
Daily Average Carbs = 43
Days of Exercise = 2
Weight Loss = 0 pounds

No loss this week. Could be because I dropped five pounds already this month. Could be because my exercise dropped down to two days this week. Could be I found my CCL at 43 carbs.

This week's food plan will drop the carb level back down and I am committed to working out four days this week (2 TaeBo workouts and 2 walks). We'll see what this week produces.

All my prep cooking is complete. I have five flax cakes ready for my breakfasts, five ziplock bags with individual portions of chicken wings in them, and a container of egg salad.

I'm wanting to finish February strong to commemorate my one year Atkinsversary on Thursday. I will do a weigh in that morning just to get a grand total of the year. My goal at the beginning of the month was to make it to the 75 pound mark and I have reached that, so anything more is just gravy!

I keep telling myself this over and over today because I have been having a tough one. I was so tempted at the grocery store this morning to buy carb laden crap to feast on today. I was tempted at the bakery, I was tempted at the check out, I was tempted at my pit stop at CVS, I browsed the Atkins bars. Before leaving to go shopping, DH and I had had an unpleasant exchange so I knew my wandering thoughts were 100% emotional. Once I returned home, DH and I talked it out to clear the air and have moved forward with our day.

The feeling to eat unhealthy foods has lingered. I thought about ordering Chinese food. I thought about ordering pizza. I thought about eating some of the Tollhouse cookies in the fridge. I thought about just allowing myself today... But I KNOW it would mean tomorrow (and the few days after) would be filled with anxiety, regret, and physical weight retention. I keep telling myself that if I feel it is time to indulge in a higher carb option (which I have done from time to time in a planned and mindful way), that I can do it next weekend after my one year weigh in. That would give me all week to decide what food it is I'd like to enjoy. Repeat, ENJOY! I will only ENJOY it if it is planned, deliberate, and mindful.

Right now I am white knuckling it, I won't lie. Perhaps I will enjoy some pork rinds with dip followed by some Lindt and PB. I know extra snacking isn't ideal, but if I feel myself really spiraling it sure is the lesser of two evils.

I do not enjoy moments like this.
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Old 02-25-2013, 04:39 PM   #156
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I made it through yesterday totally LC but with a few extra snacks and veggie portions. My carb count was 50.

Still a little touch and go today. Lots of anxiety... Even a little bit a weird 'out if body' sensation which is completely new to me. Things I noticed today:

I put on my baggy house clothes instead of my new fitted ones.
I slacked on water and exercise.
I was pouting about my newly restricted coffee ritual.

I know I am one sick puppy because I think it is possible that my issues the past few days could be a result of changing my coffee. That coffee was such a lovely part of my day and it tasted just perfect with 2 Splendas and 2 TBLS of half & half. Now it is dark and bitter.

I want to try and give it a couple more days because I know my pallet will adjust. After all, I used to take it with three heaping teaspoons of sugar and very, very light. When I first switched to Splenda, I used four per cup! I am going to try a little more but if I can't shake this feeling (and can't identify another culprit) the extra Splenda pack is back!

It has also crossed my mind that the one year anniversary on Thursday is bringing up some feelings/issues/pressures, etc. Not to mention TOM.

I just need to try and ride it out, think it through, and take it one hour at a time until the storm passes! Still eating LC, still measuring, still recording!... And still breathing!
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Old 02-26-2013, 04:31 PM   #157
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Feeling a little better today. I did return to having my coffee with 2 Splendas and 2 TBLS of half & half, making them 3 carbs per cup. I am one neurotic freak. That was really messing with my head! I can spend hours analyzing and dissecting it another time. For now, I will find other areas to trim those carbs because messing with my coffee is apparently sacrilege! Taking a step to change it is something I am definitely not ready for!!

After starting my day with the PERFECT cup of coffee, I have been back on track drinking all my water and eating on plan below my target carb range. Still a slacker on the exercise though. Where is my mojo? I must have left it somewhere around here! Ahhh, can't be perfect. Tomorrow will be a new day.

I did discover a new fabulous sweet snack last night. As I have mentioned, I have switched from SF chocolate to Lindt 90% cocoa. It is a little bitter but I am getting used to it. Last night I chopped up my one square of Lindt (3 carbs) and put it in a sauce pan over medium heat with 1 Splenda (1 carb) and 1 TBLS of HWC (1 carb). It melted nicely and I poured this 'hot fudge' over 2 TBLS of natural PB (6 carbs). For 11 carbs, I had a delicious PB chocolate treat!

Tonight I plan on doing the same thing with the chocolate but pouring it over a 1/4 cup of ricotta (2 carbs) that has been flavored with raspberry SF Torani syrup (1 carb) that has been frozen in a custard dish. Total of 8 carbs for a decadent dark chocolate raspberry frozen mousse!!

I am still thinking about this weekend's higher carb splurge, although my mother's birthday is March 13 and DH's is March 23, so I might save my splurge for their dinner and/or birthday cake. My brother is flying down from Providence to surprise my mom and I know we will probably go out for a meal. I know mom wanted to see a movie for her birthday too, so there is the possibility of popcorn there. The more I think about it, the more I think I will save my 'splurge' for then. Planning it out well in advance will allow me to really enjoy it too. Plus it gives me the motivation of seeing my brother for the first time in over a year and wanting to look as good as possible. I have lost 75 pounds since I last saw him, so I know he'll be shocked.

I forget how different I look until I see people that I haven't seen in a while. It happened twice this week at work and the people really went on and on about how different I look. It feels good but also a little weird. It's almost like the bigger they react, the worse I feel about how big they thought I looked back then. I'm still the girl that weighed 282 pounds and filled out a size 26. I still feel her pain and embarrassment when she's judged. Am I making any sense or just going off on another neurotic spin? I know they mean well and are complimenting how I look today, but it still feels a bit like a dig at my weight... And that feels uncomfortable.
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Old 02-26-2013, 07:18 PM   #158
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Hi Trish, I'm a new reader and you're very inspirational. I love seeing your menus, as it gives me great ideas for myself. Congrats on the 75 lbs.
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Old 02-27-2013, 03:41 PM   #159
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Hey Trish! I just read thru your posts from the beginning of the year. You've given me a lot to think about. Mostly about how I track and choose my food.

About the coffee: I find I need to have it a certain way. If I don't, I'm miserable. So I just make it how I want. 2 sweetener, 2 tbls cream. Can you get a liquid sweetener?
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Old 02-28-2013, 02:40 PM   #160
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dipsydoodle View Post
Hi Trish, I'm a new reader and you're very inspirational. I love seeing your menus, as it gives me great ideas for myself. Congrats on the 75 lbs.
Hi Dipsy! I'm a little embarrassed that you think my neurotic rambling is inspirational but if it helps in any way I am glad! Thank you for the support and encouragement.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Laprettygurl View Post
Hey Trish! I just read thru your posts from the beginning of the year. You've given me a lot to think about. Mostly about how I track and choose my food.

About the coffee: I find I need to have it a certain way. If I don't, I'm miserable. So I just make it how I want. 2 sweetener, 2 tbls cream. Can you get a liquid sweetener?
Pauline, it is so nice to see you again old friend! I remember your previous LC success and know you can get back on track with your nutrition. As far as the coffee, it's nice to know I'm not alone in being attached to having it 'my way'. I did look for liquid sweetener at the grocery store but they didn't carry any other than flavored SF Torani syrups. I may have to look online. Have any recommendations? Again, so great to see you posting!

So today is my Atkinsversary!! I am so excited about it. Over the ten years I have frequented this board, I've always been so impressed when people would make it to celebrate their one year (or more!) anniversary. I was never able to celebrate my own as I never lasted longer than a few months (I think my record was 6 or 7 months of LC living). But here I am! I did it!! This has officially become a way of life for a year! A WHOLE year!!

So the official one year results are that I am 75 pounds lighter and I've gone from a size 26 to a size 18. That is an average of 6.25 pounds per month.

At another time in my life, a loss of six pounds a month would have felt too slow, but since I now view this as a lifestyle change, those results seem an awesome bonus to how great I already feel just eating better and exercising more. This year came and went as it would have whether I had been binging up to 300 pounds or losing down to 207. Fast or slow, the weight really adds up (so best to be heading in the right direction).

I can honestly say I am as pleased about making it a year as I am with the physical results. It feels similar to when I graduated college at age 32. That day I was more proud of the fact that I stuck with it than I was for the actual degree in my hand.

Earlier in my life I was a classic self-saboteur. I always started things (ambitious things) but never saw them through. I had attempted to go back to school several times but quit. I had started new careers several times but gave up. I had tried to get healthy a million times but threw in the towel. Going back to college full time as a married, working, adult was difficult, demanding, and costly. I wanted to give up soooooooo many times, but I told myself I had made a commitment to myself to see it through so I had to honor it. It was the first time I ever FINISHED something I started relying on pure determination. It was also the first time I kept a promise to myself. I didn't let myself down. I proved I was capable of following through on a decision that would improve my life instead of sabotaging it.

I am feeling that again today. I know the business of being healthy will never be something I 'finish' like earning a college degree was, but this anniversary (and the future ones to come) do allow me a moment to pause and acknowledge that I am doing it. I am honoring the commitment I made to take care of myself. I am loving myself to health instead of eating myself to death.

I am tickled pink!
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Old 02-28-2013, 09:19 PM   #161
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Trish! Congrats on your 1 year Atkinsversary! Woo hoo!! I just celebrated mine last week and I had also been unable to stick with this WOE in the past so I know how awesome a feeling it is to reach this milestone!

Kudos on the 75 lb loss too!! KUTGW! May we both be posting here at LCF at our goal weights a year from now!
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Old 03-01-2013, 06:35 AM   #162
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You have done AMAZING this year!! Congrats to a year on plan!!

It's really nice to chat again for sure!! I use liquid Sugar Twin with cyclamates which is not available for sale in the USA. If you google there's places to buy it. If you can't find an acceptable one let me know and I'll try to send you some if you give me your address! It's the BEST tasting sweetener and I guarantee you won't be disappointed. I just googled 'liquid sugar twin' and the third page to pop up, globaldrugs, sells the liquid.

Quote:
Originally Posted by trishthedish View Post

So today is my Atkinsversary!!
Pauline, it is so nice to see you again old friend! I remember your previous LC success and know you can get back on track with your nutrition. As far as the coffee, it's nice to know I'm not alone in being attached to having it 'my way'. I did look for liquid sweetener at the grocery store but they didn't carry any other than flavored SF Torani syrups. I may have to look online. Have any recommendations? Again, so great to see you posting!
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Old 03-02-2013, 07:52 AM   #163
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Originally Posted by krazy cat View Post
Trish! Congrats on your 1 year Atkinsversary! Woo hoo!! I just celebrated mine last week and I had also been unable to stick with this WOE in the past so I know how awesome a feeling it is to reach this milestone!

Kudos on the 75 lb loss too!! KUTGW! May we both be posting here at LCF at our goal weights a year from now!
Thanks Cat! Your stats are awesome for the year! Congrats on making your one year anniversary!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Laprettygurl View Post
You have done AMAZING this year!! Congrats to a year on plan!!

It's really nice to chat again for sure!! I use liquid Sugar Twin with cyclamates which is not available for sale in the USA. If you google there's places to buy it. If you can't find an acceptable one let me know and I'll try to send you some if you give me your address! It's the BEST tasting sweetener and I guarantee you won't be disappointed. I just googled 'liquid sugar twin' and the third page to pop up, globaldrugs, sells the liquid.
Thanks Pauline, I will look for Sugar Twin when I move to the UK in a few months.
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Old 03-02-2013, 08:41 AM   #164
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A post in the ML got me thinking about striking the balance between taking this lifestyle one day at a time without attachment to the results on the scale and using a goal setting strategy to keep accountable. At different times I have landed on one side or the other.

On the one hand, when I am emphasizing my efforts (in my control) and detaching from the results (not in my control) I can feel satisfied each day and each day is spent 'living' and 'experiencing' health and wellness. That is good.

On the other hand, having a goal can help keep me accountable to whether my choices are supporting my weight loss efforts. It shows a pattern over time. It keeps me aware of whether my nutritional choices are physically benefiting me. That is good, too.

Maybe there is no right or wrong way. Maybe one or the other is good at different parts of the journey. I just worry if I go the 'detachment from results' route that I could stall for a while. Then I worry if I am focused on meeting my next weight goal, I lose sight of the positive progress I am making if the scale doesn't show the results I am pinning my success on.

I don't really know where I am falling on this today. Just kind of working it out.
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Old 03-03-2013, 12:08 PM   #165
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Typical Sunday routine in full effect. I started my morning with a week in review, then planning this week's meals, running to the grocery store, and then prep cooking for the week.

Last Week's Stats

Daily carb average- 39.57
Start weight/End weight- 207/206.5
Weekly loss- .5 pounds (with TOM to boot!)

Since I just completed my fourth week of daily recording, I can clearly see several patterns in my WOE. For example, I have averaged about 50 carbs per day on the weekends and 30something carbs on the weekdays. Seeing that is where I have been landing helps to give me a guide for my weekend eating. It has always been less structured, but I think it will be fair to use the number 50 as a general rule of thumb when planning my weekend eating. Since I have settled on that, I can also see that bringing down the weekday carbs will help me lower my weekly average. That was my plan this past week and it worked! All previous weekly reviews put my daily carb average over 40 and this week I just edged into the 30's. My food plan this week has me attempting to come down just a bit more on the daily carb average. Here was the results of my planning for the upcoming week:

B- Bacon platter (2 slices of Canadian bacon, 2 slices of traditional bacon) & coffee (3 carbs)
S- Egg salad with with coleslaw dressing (1 carb)
L- 5 wings (0 carbs)
S- Coffee & protein if needed (3 carbs)
D- Protein & vegetable & diet soda can (12 carbs)
S- Evening snack (8 carbs)
*60 ounces of water
*30 minutes of exercise three times this week

Total Carbs per Day= 27

Although I have 'budgeted' 8 carbs for my evening snack, that is for the highest end of my snack choice scale. There will be days lower than that. Here are my snack choices this week:

1. SF Black Cherry Jello with 1 TBLS HWC (1 carb)
2. 1 ounce of pecans (4 carbs)
3. PB with LC 'hot fudge' (1 TBLS natural PB, 1 square of 90% cocoa, 1 Splenda, 1 TBLS HWC) (8 carbs)
4. Ricotta parfait (1/4 c. Ricotta with 1 TBLS SF Torani flavored syrup) with LC 'hot fudge' (8 carbs)

When I went shopping, I bought a spaghetti squash to add to my veggie rotation this week. It has 5 carbs for a half cup, so I will probably enjoy that with either my sprouts or cauliflower with dinner each night. I'm also planning to try 'spaghetti and meatballs' with it one night using the rest of the ground pork and ground beef mix I had in my freezer. Yum!

I decided not to have my higher carb splurge meal this weekend after all. I am saving it for next week on mom's birthday. I will allow myself a cup of popcorn at the movies (I'll bring my measuring cup to eat out of) and a serving of birthday cake and ice cream. It will be my first planned higher carb day since mid- January. Not bad. I know it will mean a rise in weight for about a week and I am mentally prepared for that.

This week I want to try and have a nice clean week with plenty of water and exercise to look and feel great when I pick up my little bro at the airport Sunday. I even booked three days off work so me, mom, and little bro can spend some quality time together (hanging out listening to music, watching movies, chatting, good eats, a few drinks). Although he is now 31 years old, he will always be a baby brother to me. I'm so excited to see him! I'm also excited to surprise mom since she has no idea he's coming. We haven't decided how to surprise her yet. One year we put my little sister in a box and wrapped it in Christmas wrapping. It nearly gave mom a heart attack! I'm thinking bro and I might just go into the restaurant mom works at and sit at the bar and ask for her (she works in the kitchen). I know my mom will peek out the kitchen window before coming out to see ANYONE that asked for her by name and I know she'll just melt to see me and bro sitting there smiling at her.
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Old 03-03-2013, 05:26 PM   #166
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I am really focused on the scale results. I don't know if that's good or bad at the moment as my first week of reinducting has been pretty good.

My brother is 32 now and he will always be my little brother too!
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Old 03-05-2013, 09:26 AM   #167
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As I was driving to work this morning, I had an interesting conversation with myself. I’ve had this conversation with myself before and have even shared it here before but I’m going to document it again because I believe it is something that would (and should) be continuous for those of us on this journey.

So here I am driving to work and thinking about going for a bra fitting. Imagining getting it done led me to think that I need to make sure my arm pits are shaved good before I go (lol). I then thought I would wear a tank under my shirt so I could have some modesty while this stranger was all up in my business. Picturing this woman wrapping her tape around me, I also thought about the fact that I would explain to her that I’ve recently lost a substantial amount of weight so she would understand why my upper arms are destroyed when she catches a glimpse of them. I actually used the word ‘destroyed’ to describe the state of my arms in this conversation with myself.

At that exact moment, I had to shift into fourth gear (I drive a stick). I realized that it was unfair to describe my arms as ‘destroyed’ when my right arm was doing such a fine job with the clutch as my left arm was doing a wonderful job with the steering wheel. I have great arms! They serve me all day long!

Yes, there are lifelong scars I will carry as a result of the lifestyle I maintained for the last 34 years. I will not have a perfectly toned and svelte looking body when naked. Boo freakin’ hoo! How many people have a perfectly toned and svelte looking body when naked anyway? Like 2% or what?!?!?

And another thing, some people have other compulsions and addictions that wreak havoc on their bodies and cause irreversible damage to organs (liver, kidneys, heart, brain, etc.). I damaged my skin. All my other vital organs can be healthy for the rest of my life through good nutrition and regular physical activity. My skin will be loose in a few areas, I will have stretch marks… it won’t ‘look’ perfect. I’ll live.
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Old 03-05-2013, 08:08 PM   #168
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Hey Trish, your post about focusing on what YOU CAN do that day, - the efforts you can control - really spoke to me. It's of course good to look down the road at the goal, but each day is a battle, and it's easy to get discouraged. I kind of took your post to mean, take each day as it comes, and enjoying your new way of living.

Also, yeah, you might not ever have perfect arms or whatever, but the sheer factor of not carrying around the weight and benefits to your body overall will be worth it.
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Old 03-16-2013, 04:12 PM   #169
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I've had a busy and eventful week and realized I hadn't posted in a bit. Here's a recap.

Last Saturday I went to my BFF's house for a sleepover. There are seven of us ladies that get together every few months for a night of food, drink, singing, and heart to hearts. I brought rum, diet soda, and wings in an effort to stay LC through the event. I did great until 4 a.m. rolled around and I was very inebriated. It was at that point I decided (in my very logical state) that I would go ahead and enjoy the fruit salad... And the chex mix... And the pizza.

Then as I drove back the following morning I stopped to gas up and grab a coffee (it is a three hour drive home). I went ahead and grabbed some pastries to eat in the car along with a VERY tall coffee. The rest of that day was LC. I picked up my little brother at the airport that night.

The next day I brought little brother into my mom's restaurant to surprise her with his visit. I ordered red wine and chowder. That night, mother and brother settled into my home for a few days of birthday celebration... Complete with LOTS of comfort foods.

Mother and brother left Wednesday night and I returned to my normal, healthy lifestyle Thursday morning. I was left with a dull headache for the first day back on track and a noticeable bloat for a couple of days but as of right now (Saturday night) I am feeling back to normal. I will weigh in tomorrow morning as usual and expect to see a few pounds up. I'm OK with that as I can feel I've already released most of the water weight I had the first couple of days.

So how do I feel about this past week? Surprisingly, I feel fine. I didn't feel like I was binging. I was obviously eating out of the ordinary but it wasn't a compulsive feeling and I didn't feel like I had to 'get as much in as possible' like I have in the past. I also didn't feel emotional about it. It sort of felt the way I imagine 'normal' eaters feel when they go on a vacation (I did book three days off of work for a five day stretch). As soon as the 'vacation' felt over, I went right back to my normal food routine.

I haven't had anxiety about it. I haven't felt guilt or regret. I haven't been tempted to keep going. It was nice. It's over. It feels good to be back in my healthy routine. I don't feel like I lost any of my progress and and am looking forward to getting into onederland in the not too distant future.

This week actually felt like a great experience for me. To be able to overindulge yet not trigger binge/compulsion feelings is a huge milestone for me. To be able to get right back to normal without anxiety was an amazing feeling. To realize that healthy LC eating is what I consider 'normal' is mind blowing!

Don't get me wrong, I am no where near the time that I can do this on a regular basis. I don't want to play with fire. I'm simply taking it as another experience along my journey towards good health.
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Old 03-17-2013, 07:20 AM   #170
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My official weigh in this morning clocked me in at 209. That is a 2.5 gain since last week's OWI. Considering my nutritional intake this past week, I think that is more than fair. I'm sure if I had taken a peek at my weight mid week I would have seen the scale up as much as ten pounds, but I knew it would be water and that it would be counterproductive to see it and get myself freaked out. I also knew what I had to do to drop the water weight and get back into ketosis and now I have done it and can relax with a slight 2.5 gain moving into the upcoming week. I remember Dr. Atkins mentioning this in DANDR... That if you get off track or experience a gain during OWL, pre- maintenance, or maintenance you should go back to Induction to remedy the situation and then work your way back up the ladder. Dr. A's advice has served me well up to this point so I'm going to keep taking it!

This week's plans and goals:

B- bacon and coffee (3 carbs)
S- boiled egg and mayo (.5 carbs)
L- boiled egg with mayo (.5 carbs)
S- coffee and leftover protein if needed (3 carbs)
D- protein, vegetable, condiments (12 carbs)
S- pork rinds with ranch or jello with HWC (1 carb)

Total carbs = 20
Water intake= 60 ounces
Exercise= 3 walks this week

Going to do my weekly prep cooking today. It is an easy list since I am keeping it simple this week with Induction levels. Just boil and peel 10 eggs to keep at work with my mayo and prepare a batch of SF jello. Easy peasy!

I think this Induction menu will work fine for me since I can feel I am in ketosis from eating 20 carbs a day since Thursday. I'm not feeling hunger or cravings so my feedings are just an effort to keep the fats, protein, and carb percentages in optimum weight loss range.
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Old 03-24-2013, 07:10 AM   #171
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Official weigh in this morning read 205.5. That is a 3.5 loss this week. Each day this week my carb intake was 20 grams or less. I have noticed less snacking in the evening (thank you ketosis).

I am on spring break this week so my routine is a little off. I am going to spend the day out with DH instead of my normal Sunday morning of shopping and prep cooking. I will meal plan for the week tomorrow morning instead.

Yesterday was DH's birthday and I am proud to say I bought him a little birthday cupcake in lieu of a cake that I would be tempted to share. We also went out for dinner and I stuck with Coke Zero and wings.

Today we will be spending the day at the auction so I am packing nuts and they normally put out a wine and cheese spread, so I'll nibble on the cheese too.

Happy to be on plan, losing, feeling good.
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Old 03-25-2013, 11:55 AM   #172
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Trish, great job on keeping your carbs low and ditching the weight from your higher carb days with friends and family. It was nice to read that you felt comfortable enough to enjoy eating off plan but to not pig out or binge and that your idea of getting back to normal eating was LC. This is a major thought shift, something definitely to take note of. I agree with the assessment of thinner people and how they deal with eating a bit too much on vacation. When it is over they just get back to normal. When I see my thin friends eat a lot of food or eat desserts, they seem to naturally eat better for a few days. I don't see them struggle or get upset. They know how to eat to balance and keep their weight constant.

I have been making your spinach frittata for my BF. He loves it. I add shredded parmesan instead of gorgonzola and then maybe a little chopped ham or bacon. The bulk of the spinach helps him feel like it is a big plate of food and he is very satisfied.

I hope you have a great week off.
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Nothing right now can possibly taste as good as thin will feel!!!
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Old 03-26-2013, 08:06 AM   #173
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I copied this from the PG to have it here to look back on.

My mother with bipolar.
She's back into her depressive, self-destructive mode... Dismantling everything positive in her life. These phases are happening with shorter productive phases in between. She used to be able to stay on her feet for years in between the meltdowns that created the need to 'start over'. Now she can only go months.

In 2012, she lived with DH and I from February to September to 'get on her feet' (again). I tried to convince her to get on meds, to apply for disability, to enter vocational rehab, to get into counseling, to stop self-medicating. No, no, no, no, no. She didn't need those things. She just had to find the right job, the right apartment. Things would be different this time.

She found a very good paying job for her skill level in our area and a very clean, safe, and affordable apartment. I didn't just shove her out of our home, I made sure she had steady footing and the means to maintain it.

It's only been 7 months and she walked out of her job and will not have her rent on the first.

I feel like I can't participate in this anymore. I'm torn between viewing her as a toxic person and as a sick person. I can't enable her, but yet she has a mental illness. However, I am hardly the model of freaking mental health myself and I really need all of my energy to care for myself and keep my own life on the right track right now. On the one hand that makes me feel like a selfish child shirking her duty but on the other hand makes me feel like I am getting healthier in myself.

As some of you know, I am in the middle of a big career change, a marriage reconciliation, and a relocation to another country. This last year I have finally focused on my life and things are improving because of it. I can't lose my momentum.

Time for me to make an appointment with my own counselor to come up with a strategy. I hate that my life gets sideswiped each time she cycles.
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Old 03-26-2013, 08:17 AM   #174
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Phranquie View Post
Trish, great job on keeping your carbs low and ditching the weight from your higher carb days with friends and family. It was nice to read that you felt comfortable enough to enjoy eating off plan but to not pig out or binge and that your idea of getting back to normal eating was LC. This is a major thought shift, something definitely to take note of. I agree with the assessment of thinner people and how they deal with eating a bit too much on vacation. When it is over they just get back to normal. When I see my thin friends eat a lot of food or eat desserts, they seem to naturally eat better for a few days. I don't see them struggle or get upset. They know how to eat to balance and keep their weight constant.

I have been making your spinach frittata for my BF. He loves it. I add shredded parmesan instead of gorgonzola and then maybe a little chopped ham or bacon. The bulk of the spinach helps him feel like it is a big plate of food and he is very satisfied.

I hope you have a great week off.
Thanks Frankie. I'm glad your boyfriend is satisfied with the fritter. It helps so much to actually ENJOY the healthy food we eat.

I agree that the shift of viewing LC as normal is major. Another example of this popped up this weekend. DH made a comment that he wanted to cut down on his snacking. I told him that he should. He said it is hard because the snacks are in the house (because he puts them on the grocery list!). I said that I manage to keep away from those snacks without a problem even though they are in the cupboard. He said, 'Yeah, but you are on a diet to lose weight.' Without thinking I quickly (and naturally) responded with 'I'm not on a diet! I just eat healthy! I can't help that my weight has been coming off as a consequence.'

I felt so defensive at the idea of being on a diet! I think that is fantastic!!
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Old 03-26-2013, 08:57 AM   #175
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Yes congradulations.
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Old 03-27-2013, 10:36 AM   #176
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Yes congradulations.
Thanks Beef!

I struggled with the binge monster a little last night. I know it is related to the fact that I am trying to identify new boundaries while dealing with my mother's most recent downturn. I am feeling a lot of discomfort in my chest and gut as a reaction to the guilt and anxiety associated with making changes to stop this relationship from being codependent. It is hard to watch her struggle and not swoop in to save the day. I saw a quote that resonated:

There is nothing worse than watching someone drown and not being able to convince them that they can save themselves by simply standing up.

I am standing back and watching her drown with my fingers crossed that she will stand up. After 30 years on enabling (yes, my grooming for the role started when I was 5), I do now see it needs to stop if I am going to be healthy and functional in my own life.

I managed to get through the physical discomfort and the urge to binge to soothe it and saw a new low of 204 this morning. That's 78 pounds down.

She is coming over for a visit this afternoon and I have some concerns. I know it may be more difficult to refrain from enabling patterns when she is right in my face crying. I am digging deep and aligning myself with the frequency of the highest power to guide me through this afternoon and to come out of it whole... (and LC!)
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Old 03-27-2013, 05:23 PM   #177
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Wow Trish, you have a lot to deal with. I know for me the tendency to binge would be right there gnawing at me when my stress goes up. I think you are doing the right thing by not being the one to swoop in and rescue your mom. You can certainly present her with some clear headed and well thought out options, but she is the one who must make those decisions for herself. If she does not make them now how will she function when you move? Caring for yourself first is important, above all else. People who do not want to help themselves will often be happy to suck you into their circumstance and take you on a ride circling the drain with them.

I hope things get a bit better for you.

WTG on reaching a new low!
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Old 03-29-2013, 06:58 AM   #178
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Wow Trish, you have a lot to deal with. I know for me the tendency to binge would be right there gnawing at me when my stress goes up. I think you are doing the right thing by not being the one to swoop in and rescue your mom. You can certainly present her with some clear headed and well thought out options, but she is the one who must make those decisions for herself. If she does not make them now how will she function when you move? Caring for yourself first is important, above all else. People who do not want to help themselves will often be happy to suck you into their circumstance and take you on a ride circling the drain with them.

I hope things get a bit better for you.

WTG on reaching a new low!
Thanks Frankie. Congrats to you on your ever plummeting stats!! You must be dialed in to your nutritional approach! Do you mind me asking if you know how many a carbs a day you try to keep to?

I really don't have a burden any heavier than anyone else's. I think accepting that has really helped me this last year. In the past, I would look at any little stressor or life 'hiccup' as a reason why the time was not right for me to focus on getting healthy. I was convinced I needed a perfect, stress free grace period in order to not need food to cope. When has life ever given any of us one of those?! LOL! I now see the actual point of this transformation is learning to do it WHILE dealing with the things in life that trigger the compulsion to eat. Wasn't it so very sweet of life to give me so many hurdles this year to ensure I was really committed to change? (insert sarcasm and eye roll).

I am so bummed that my spring break is nearly over. The next month at work is going to be extremely demanding and I am not looking forward to it at all. I feel the dread in my stomach and chest. I was thinking about getting a 5-HTP supplement to help with my anxiety. It hasn't been debilitating, but over the past several months it has been more present than I would like it to be. I started researching it after my BFF recommended it as a possible aid for my mother, since her lack of health insurance makes it difficult for her to get on RX meds. My only concern about starting anything new is that what I am doing now nutritionally is working for me and I hate to tweak and discover that something stalls me or produces some sort of unwanted side effect. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. On the other hand, I would have to admit the anxiety has made me slightly less functional, so it could be considered 'broke'. We'll see... I want to think about it a bit more.
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Old 03-29-2013, 09:04 AM   #179
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Trish, I could have written the same thing about needing everything in my life to be perfect to be able to focus on my health and weight loss. In the past I have also used pain and several surgeries as a reason to go off plan and eat copious amounts of junk/comfort foods. I finally realized that starting and stopping losing weight because things in my life were not "right" (perfect) was an excuse because life is never going to be a constant flow of perfect circumstances and I need to deal with losing weight and deling with it in my real, stressed and flawed life.

For my plan I keep to very low calories and higher carbs. My carbs average 40+ a day. I have to have pretty low calories and slightly higher carbs or I just will not lose. So I am not a typical low carber in that respect. I know from past weight loss what will and won't work for my body. Plus as I get older it is harder to lose and be able to eat more. I am at a point where I am satisfied with what I am doing and happy with my rate of loss. I do have one or two portions of a higher carb food on the weekends when we tend to go out. I work those carbs into my averages and can sometimes go up to 60-70 carbs on a special occasion. This helps me feel "normal" and it is only one portion so I am not tempted to overeat it. If I make something that is really tempting at home my thoughts would circle around to it every few minutes until I would eat the entire recipe. Otherwise I am at a point where I don't think about food obsessively any more. I have not binged since July. Food and what I will eat for the day is not the first thing I think about in the morning anymore. But I do carefully weigh, measure, plan and log my foods so I can see where I am over time. I also have been doing a daily IF where I only eat in the evening. This takes out a lot of anxiety or constant thought about food during the day. I am satisfied with the lower calories in a shorter window of time to eat. I do sip on diluted diet cranberry juice or crystal light or diet coke during the day. If I am really hungry and it is not head hunger, then I will eat a very small meal.

I have only recently been hearing about the benefits of 5-HTP. Right now I take lots of vitamins to make sure my decreased calories do not deplete my body of what it needs. If I was at a point where the benefits of a new supplement outweigh the side effects of slower loss, I might consider it, but it would take a lot of thought before I would add it.
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Old 03-31-2013, 01:17 PM   #180
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Frankie, I am happy to hear you have found the WOE that works for you both physically and mentally. I have read many interesting articles on the health benefits of both very low calorie and fasting. It seems that for some, it does a body good! The fact that you have been binge free is proof you have tapped into something good... That and the rapid weight loss!

My OWI read 203.5 this morning. I am going to keep my carbs in the 20 gram range again this week in the hopes. That I see 202 next Sunday, putting me in the 80 pound club. Next mini goal after that is onderland! If I stick to Induction, I may just make it in two weeks.

Spring break is over so it is back to the grind. My meal planning, shopping, and prep cooking is done. Here is this week's plan:

B- Bacon and coffee (3 carbs)
S- Boiled egg with mayo (.5 carbs)
L- Boiled egg with mayo (.5 carbs)
S- Coffee (3 carbs)
D- Protein, vegetable, and condiments (10 carbs)
S- Evening snack (3 carbs)

20 carbs per day
40 ounces of water per day
1 diet soda can per day


I MUST get back to exercising. I have completely stopped. If I can do it twice this week as a way to re-establish the habit, I will be happy.
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