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Old 05-22-2013, 02:05 PM   #1291
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I read that and was like, WHOOOAAAA!!! Then I proceeded to kinda look around me to see if someone was punking me. .... but seriously, its straight to the point and no way to twist any of those words around to mean anything but what it says!

I need to remember it too!!!

And that "lazy" thing....has me so restless I can't even begin to write out what I really mean.. but it's affecting every part of my day, even as I try to go to sleep, and even when I finally do sleep. DH says I toss and turn like crazy and it's been going on for weeks now. I can only attribute it to this antsy feeling I've been having regarding feeling the huge need/desire to get going and feeling stuck all at the same time.
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Old 05-22-2013, 03:07 PM   #1292
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If it is important enough to you, you will find a way. If it is not, you will find an excuse.

Guess the jig is up, eh?
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Old 05-23-2013, 12:37 AM   #1293
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Why are you going to choose failure when success is an option? -Jillian Michaels

^^^^^^This^^^^^^^^ right here....yep, time to figure it out!
Jillian really REALLY needs to get outta my head!
Oh this fits me sooooo bad right now! Binged yesterday after getting some good news - idiot! Oh well... onwards....

Hope you're doing OK Dani xx
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Old 05-23-2013, 08:01 AM   #1294
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If it is important enough to you, you will find a way. If it is not, you will find an excuse.

I get this quote about importance and success, but I do disagree. Maybe it's me feeling guilty or resembling that remark, IDK. But to say we are fat because being thin is not important to us is the same as saying "if you really wanted to be thin, you would be". Dammit we all want to be thin, and many of us have struggled with weight issues for years. We are here everyday because it's important to us. I'm not making excuses, I'm just tired of being blamed (or misunderstood) for being fat. We all know that it's not that simple. I wish it were. How many times have we stuck to the plan, counting...measuring? To no avail? Motivation is the key and it's hard to be motivated when you are getting nowhere. I get on and I fall off the wagon sometimes more than once a day. Am I weak? Maybe. Do I want to stay fat? Hell no. If I had the answer, I would be thin right now. If there was an answer.

Why do some people make it, and others don't? I don;t think it's because they wanted it more than me. 99% mental? I think it's 110% mental.
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Old 05-23-2013, 08:17 AM   #1295
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If it is important enough to you, you will find a way. If it is not, you will find an excuse.

I get this quote about importance and success, but I do disagree. Maybe it's me feeling guilty or resembling that remark, IDK. But to say we are fat because being thin is not important to us is the same as saying "if you really wanted to be thin, you would be". Dammit we all want to be thin, and many of us have struggled with weight issues for years. We are here everyday because it's important to us. I'm not making excuses, I'm just tired of being blamed (or misunderstood) for being fat. We all know that it's not that simple. I wish it were. How many times have we stuck to the plan, counting...measuring? To no avail? Motivation is the key and it's hard to be motivated when you are getting nowhere. I get on and I fall off the wagon sometimes more than once a day. Am I weak? Maybe. Do I want to stay fat? Hell no. If I had the answer, I would be thin right now. If there was an answer.

Why do some people make it, and others don't? I don;t think it's because they wanted it more than me. 99% mental? I think it's 110% mental.
Here here!! I obviously agree..I have done 90% of things right over the past two years...same weight. I keep trying....which on some days I wonder WHY. But I keep trying and always will.. Being completely stubborn lends itself well to some things, I guess
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Old 05-23-2013, 08:24 AM   #1296
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I think that there are underlying things that we all have inside us that can hinder our success.. The people who tend to fly straight through from beginning to end without a hitch always tend to be the ones that have no real hang-ups about issues in life I guess. Or so it seems.

I don't believe that we consciously stop ourselves from succeeding...I think we do it without realizing it.. if you've ever seen an episode of TBL and you see contestants who are working out really hard and Jillian or Bob are in their faces telling them to give them more more more and the contestant is saying I can't I can't... then suddenly they burst into tears..and a breakthrough is born..

For me I believe I could have more success than I've had (lately) just for the sole reason that I haven't been able to stay on course.... that's no one's fault but my own... there's always *something* that keeps me from doing X, Y, and Z more often than not.. and I keep talking about figuring out wth am I so afraid of succeeding for????? Cause it's true! I KNOW how to lose weight. I KNOW how to work out. I've done it!! I had 25lbs left to lose before I reached my ultimate goal of 125... I KNOW I can do it.. but.....success is terrifying to me.
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Old 05-23-2013, 08:24 AM   #1297
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Here here!! I obviously agree..I have done 90% of things right over the past two years...same weight. I keep trying....which on some days I wonder WHY. But I keep trying and always will.. Being completely stubborn lends itself well to some things, I guess
Thank you Amy!

Danielle, sorry for ranting in your journal...
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Old 05-23-2013, 08:27 AM   #1298
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I also think the people who have shot from point A to point B in a huge hurry are the ones who have kept their noses to the grindstone, not cheating, always working out... totally embracing the ENTIRE lifestyle all at once... that hasn't been me in a very very long time... in fact, since the time I lost All. That. Weight. Getting to 150 was work and I worked it every second of every day, 7 days a week.. I never deviated.


As for "excuses", I think that word can be used literally or in terms of the underlying situations/issues that continue to hold many of us back and it manifests into reasons why we make the choices we make in regards to food, exercise, etc...

but what do I know..I'm just one measely woman trying to keep herself from going over the edge..

Last edited by DesertGurl; 05-23-2013 at 08:35 AM..
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Old 05-23-2013, 08:29 AM   #1299
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The reasons why we can't lose the weight are more than likely connected to reasons we NEED to lose weight in the first place. We don't always recognize the 'why's', but all know about food being the 'drug of choice'. It has padded us from things, comforted us, kept us company, been our friend, soothed and mollified us in our frustration or anger or pain. That kind of devotion is hard to give up.
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Old 05-23-2013, 08:45 AM   #1300
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I also think the people who have shot from point A to point B in a huge hurry are the ones who have kept their noses to the grindstone, not cheating, always working out... totally embracing the ENTIRE lifestyle all at once... that hasn't been me in a very very long time... in fact, since the time I lost All. That. Weight. Getting to 150 was work and I worked it every second of every day, 7 days a week.. I never deviated.


As for "excuses", I think that word can be used literally or in terms of the underlying situations/issues that continue to hold many of us back and it manifests into reasons why we make the choices we make in regards to food, exercise, etc...

but what do I know..I'm just one measely woman trying to keep herself from going over the edge..
Obsession is the answer. The thinnest I ever was (117) came from blind obsession to lose weight. It happened before I married or had kids or a real job. It was my life, my obsession.

You are not measly.
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Old 05-23-2013, 08:51 AM   #1301
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You are wonderful, Dani...just for the simple fact that you are still HERE and TRYING. So many don't. Somehow I think it a little easier for some to stick to the straight and narrow than others. I have decided not to like them...kidding kidding!! I might be a titch jealous of other's successes..

I hate the idea that it is all our fault...where it really might be sometimes. Maybe I'm in denial!
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Old 05-23-2013, 09:17 AM   #1302
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I get so tired of hearing myself.


...and as for food being our friend....all it's done is serve to making me sick.. so when do I tell it to take a hike and stop using something that is actually hurting me as a way of making me feel better short term?
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Old 05-23-2013, 11:56 AM   #1303
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Your journal has become a place for deep thinking and conversation. And I like that. (I like it when it's fun and silly too! ) I think it takes a lot of soul searching for us all to be on this journey. And just like our bodies, it changes constantly. The emotions can be extreme: from the depths of despair to the highest exhilaration to the most overwhelming fears and insecurities. I've had them all, and continue to each day. And it still surprises me!

I do think we have to make this almost an obsession, especially if we have a lot to lose and this will be a long haul. To keep at it for months, and sometimes years to get to your ultimate goal, it has to be so important to you. And by "you" I don't mean any particular "you", just the editorial "you." That's what I've found anyway. I've started and given up on many diets, many different times. Only twice in my life have I stuck to it long enough to lose large amounts, this being one of them. And I do have setbacks - oh boy, do I ever. But ultimately, I want this SOOOOO badly, that I just can't let myself give up, and I think that's the difference. When I want it with every molecule of my being, I can do it.

I've been at this weight loss thing for a year and a half now. I still have 70 - 80 pounds to go, so I'll be at it for another year. And I've been struggling lately. Struggling with no losses, struggling with diet fatigue, feeling like even though I've come so far, I still have so far to go and it's a bummer. But a week and a half ago, I started a "maintenance" break, and I've lost 7 pounds in that time. So my body is definitely telling me something, and I'm trying desperately to listen and really hear it. It just keeps changing the rules on me, and I'm too slow to keep up!

Sorry for the ramble! I've just been watching your struggles and I want you to know you're not alone! There's so much more to it than just dieting, or exercising, or mental fortitude. I have so much admiration for all on these boards who try, and try, and keep trying. No one understands like all of you do!
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Old 05-23-2013, 12:53 PM   #1304
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LCG~ Thank you
I come here to vent and write because I know somewhere here someone knows exactly what I'm going through. While I get massive support at home from a husband that truly adores me and would do whatever it takes to support me, he somehow still doesn't (and I don't expect him to!) understand what it's like to have substantial amounts of weight to lose.. He asks constantly about what more he can do to help me and honestly, at this point, I got nuthin. I mean, in all honesty, if I really want this then it's ME who has to work it to get the results that I want. I think he hates feeling helpless and unable to figure this out for me, cause I'm positive that if he could, he would take this on for me and do it all so I wouldn't have to suffer, hurt, be frustrated, whatever....he would just do it to see me happy.

I am in the camp of obssessing too.. I agree that with the amount of weight that needs to be lost, ya almost pretty much have to..it just is what it is..

I started thinking about that time that I actually saw nearly *total* success...which was the very first time I ever set out on a real weight loss journey.. I've been thinking about what got me there and the comments I made earlier about how I ate, lived, breathed, slept, everything weight loss..I was embracing the total lifestyle. I made myself a priority and took no prisoners.. but the biggest part about it? I kept it extremely simple. I literally knew not much about exercise and dieting at the time..I had an exercise bike that I'd bought several years before and it served as a pretty good clothes hanger and nothing more...I had that bike and a set of 3lb hand weights, that's it. No ideas about joining a gym, or even videos of any kind..nothing.. I worked that bike every day and used those weights and did tons of stretching and core-type exercises to work the other muscle groups.. simple, easy-peasy stuff with nothing fancy whatsoever..

I tried several times to get back to this "feeling" but doing several other plans, LC, no-carb, low fat..you name it and I've probably tried it! I feel like the time has come to go back to simplicity and find a way to just gain back control of my days..(and my mind!) and see what happens. I need to quit thinking so much and so hard about every last thing and just do something...and just KISS---Keep It Simple Stupid I need to find the way out of my head and get out of my own damn way for the first time in a really really long time! I need to quit drowning in the sea of questions about numbers, minutes, types of foods, plans, everything.. and just do it easy..count some calories and exercise the way I used to. I'm lookin for a new bike and I dug out my sets of weights.. I'm not gonna worry about walking, using dvd's or joining a gym.. nada.

I gotta tell ya, as soon as I said this out loud to DH earlier it was like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders. He looked at me, smiled, and said, I think you just found your answer. Simple and easy and figure out a way to get excited about some new healthy recipes that fits with DD's food restrictions..
I'm going to eventually start getting up early before the house wakes up and doing my workouts--the way I did them years ago..I was up and at'em and ready to begin my day and I truly believe that by taking that time for me in the quiet as the sun was coming up really set me up for good success!

The one thing I know for sure is I'll be eliminating as much wheat from my diet because 1. I don't really miss much of it when it's gone and 2. DD16 can't have it and I really have no business eating it either.

The best thing is, that this time around, I've got some pretty great friends along for the ride with me and a place to come and vent, celebrate, and motivate!
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Old 05-23-2013, 01:38 PM   #1305
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back at ya, girl!

I'm so glad you've worked it all out in your head, and know how to move forward again. Simplicity. Even the word is like a breath of fresh air. Whew.

And by the way, your hubs sounds like a true gem!
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Old 05-23-2013, 02:09 PM   #1306
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back at ya, girl!

I'm so glad you've worked it all out in your head, and know how to move forward again. Simplicity. Even the word is like a breath of fresh air. Whew.

And by the way, your hubs sounds like a true gem!
Thank God! I needed to get out of my head. Period! Something to be said for simplicity!.... yanno when something's been held underwater against its will, and then suddenly let go and it kinda flings out up out of the water? That's exactly how I feel today..like all the doubt I had, all the confusion & questions, everything that had been holding me under, it's like the ties that were binding me were suddenly cut...and now I can finally breathe! Phew is right!

I feel lucky, yup! My hubbs is a good good guy who spends his days just trying to make me happy. I am way lucky to have him!
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Old 05-23-2013, 02:55 PM   #1307
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With you all the way Danielle!
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Old 05-23-2013, 03:45 PM   #1308
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Way to go hun x
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Old 05-23-2013, 05:57 PM   #1309
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Love the KISS plan! I think you're on to something.
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Old 05-24-2013, 09:50 AM   #1310
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Love the KISS plan! I think you're on to something.
Amazing how complicated I can make things!

Summer break has officially begun for the kiddo.. it's gonna be a loooonnnnngggg summer. DD18 has been off for a few weeks and already come and gone to Cali for a few weeks..

Feeling better mentally which is a huge relief. Just sticking to the tracking and ownership of calories..I need to reduce alot in order to see loss so that's the plan...I'm tapering down from maintenance levels down to where I can start to see some losses.. I need to go back to red. cal creamer for my coffee instead of hwc and I'm not happy about that! Yummy hwc how I love you!

Movies tonight! Fast 6!!!
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Old 05-24-2013, 03:03 PM   #1311
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Cannot believe how quick the day has flown!
I have done really well with food today (except the hwc @ brekkie)..
trying to keep the rest of the day low so I can enjoy this evening.

I got out for a short walk. Very short. Only like 20 min. and that's because it's too flippin hot outside... but it's somethin. Better than parked on the couch wathing the SVU marathon

Feeling much peace this Friday. Crossing my fingers that it sticks.
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Old 05-24-2013, 03:38 PM   #1312
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Great job on the walk!! 20 minutes is good and enough to lighten the mood, bring in some endorphins. I'm really happy you're having a good day!

Have a great weekend!
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Old 05-25-2013, 10:13 AM   #1313
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So the movie was great. Totally enjoyed over the top stunts that would never ever happen in the real world ... gotta love Paul Walker and Vin Diesel..
I think we're going again tonight to see Hangover 3.. good way to spend late night hours!

I did behave myself at the theater..I had maybe about 2 cups of popcorn and maybe 10 Reese's pieces.. I dunno that I plan on any sort of snacks for tonight..

Got stuff to do this early afternoon I won't get out for a short walk like I'd wanted before it gets too hot.. I'll have to think of something to do for today.
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Old 05-25-2013, 10:26 AM   #1314
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Hey is your theater in a mall? That's a great place to put in 20 minutes before your movie starts....air conditioned too.

Had a good night last night. My biggest splurge was a big spoon of peanut butter. Yum. Enjoy the movie. Those "Hangover" movies make me a little bit nuts.

I need to see the New Star Trek movie. In fact, I may go today by myself while hubby's out playing music...or just go mall walking.
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Old 05-25-2013, 10:37 AM   #1315
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No the theater isn't near the mall...I mean, there is a theater IN the mall but we don't care for it.. Hangover movies ARE nuts! Funny you should mention mall walking...all those years ago..DH and I used to go walking in the mall almost daily...it was when he was working from home so every morning after getting the kids off to school we'd go and walk for awhile.. I'll have to see about getting back to that..may save my sanity!

I love love love pb Too much!

Star Trek was FAB!
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Old 05-26-2013, 10:29 AM   #1316
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Survived another day.

Quiet holiday weekend here...everyone is busy working or trotting off with friends..so just lil ole me puttering around home....which is a scary thing! Kinda nice catching up on dvr-stuff...nothing like a Client List marathon (uninterrupted) on a Sunday morning!

DH is coming around and wanting to start embracing a healthier lifestyle..I think he's seeing that we can ALL benefit from it. This isn't coming from a place of just wanting to support me (which I have always appreciated!) but more of realizing that there is something for him to benefit from as well. This makes me feel good. It shows that he is actually listening to me when I talk about healthy eating, exercise, etc. Nice to know that we are fighting together to be around for eachother for a good long time
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Old 05-26-2013, 10:46 AM   #1317
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That is good news! Think how much better it will be with everyone on the same page...er plate. Seriously. This is good news.

Nice to have a quiet weekend. Mine is so far. DH is out looking for a bargain at the local music store sales event. I'm taking a break from yard work, and man I'm telling you it's overwhelming. I'm not sure what's for breakfast yet. I'm missing my carbs like crazy but doing yard work may be side effect of NOT eating them. You think?
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Old 05-26-2013, 11:44 AM   #1318
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How great for you AND for DH. And I'm sure that may make it easier on you to keep to a plan, if he's in it with you. And a Client List marathon sounds good! I love that show! Evan....yum yum!
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Old 05-26-2013, 04:50 PM   #1319
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That is good news! Think how much better it will be with everyone on the same page...er plate. Seriously. This is good news.

Nice to have a quiet weekend. Mine is so far. DH is out looking for a bargain at the local music store sales event. I'm taking a break from yard work, and man I'm telling you it's overwhelming. I'm not sure what's for breakfast yet. I'm missing my carbs like crazy but doing yard work may be side effect of NOT eating them. You think?
He was on board with me last year when I went on Atkins..he stuck to it nearly completely except for when he was at work... he dropped weight like crazy but coulda cared less... well, now, I think he's thinking that he'd like to lose it and be done losing for good.. this time it's him doing it because he wants it for himself and not because he just wants to be supportive..

I'm kinda glad that I don't have yardwork to worry about but at the same time, during spring and fall I miss having that outdoor space to be outside and enjoy the weather..


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Originally Posted by LoCarbGal View Post
How great for you AND for DH. And I'm sure that may make it easier on you to keep to a plan, if he's in it with you. And a Client List marathon sounds good! I love that show! Evan....yum yum!
It always makes it easier when everyone's in the same place...this will help dealing with DD16 as well so I guess it's a win-win.. DD18 is barely ever here anymore but she'll have to adjust I guess.. I love Evan...I keep wanting to call him "Dex" from Something Borrowed..one of my most favoritist movies I'm almost caught up (2 episodes left)...I'm so not grooving on him having a girlfriend that isn't Riley!
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Old 05-26-2013, 08:37 PM   #1320
Way too much time on my hands!
 
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You seem to be in a much better place girl. I am so happy for you . I'm also glad you are back here !!!!
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