CindyLou's Journey/Transformation

[Crazy Mimi]

SO SO SO tired of this. It has to be my BP cuz it is only 1 ankle/foot. I don't understand - what is it - does the salty stuff get funneled into that ankle? How can one be swollen and one look perfectly fine????????

It doesn't help - they shut our water off at noon - so I can't drink ANY water due to the dieuretic that goes with my BP meds.

[Crazy Mimi]

My BP has been wobbling and all over the map. I will retain TONS of water one day, gush it all out the next, only to have more retained when I wake up the next day - even though I ate on plan!!!

SO - I have to bite the bullet and go see the doc. While I am there, I will be discussing my weight loss desires. Maybe he will want to do new blood work and see where I am at currently. Will also be discussing my over-eating and see if there is anything that can help me curb my apetite until my stomack shrinks a little..... It can't hurt.

I used to take phentermine before the phen-fen scare... Then when that happened, he took me off of it. I was only on halp of it though. It worked and even after I quit taking it - I did not put any weight on again until I got depressed. I was doing so even after I quit taking it that while I was pregnant with my youngest DD I did NOT gain weight during the pregnancy and (the OB-GYN was LIVID) after I had her - I was down to my lowest in years (18/20) then I got depressed 6 mths down the road and put it all back on and MORE.

I know I am a food addict. I have to learn how to deal with this addiction.

[Crazy Mimi]

OK - so my ankle/foot is still swelling. Dr appt Thursday.
I am going to get to the bottom of this. Also, realized by writing down everything I am eating - that I am sneaking in too much food.

So I am writing everything down that I eat; and I am going to become successful at this. I do not like feeling bloated and fat.

[Crazy Mimi]

Tomorrow morning I am restarting atkin's induction and I am going to suceed. That's it. I am too tired of losing the same 6 pounds all the time.

[Psmileyf]

Good luck today!

[Crazy Mimi]

Originally Posted by Psmileyf

Good luck today!

Thank you!

Breakfast today - egg and breakfast sausage - the type in a patty - NO TORTILLA

Oh - and WATER WATER WATER

[Crazy Mimi]

Well, yesterday I messed up and accidentally took an anti-anxiety pill rather than my BP med. When I am anxious, it just calms me down, nothing else. Well - when not anxious, it knocks me out...

So - as a result, I did not eat much yesterday, I was not worried about anything and I ended up sleeping 14 to 18 hours.....

I feel very relaxed today; however my back hurts from sleeping too much..

I weighed today and was pleased with the result 276 (which gets me geared up and makes me want to keep up the good work...)

I had my breakfast of egg and sausage.
Our lunches have switched with a new employee now. We will rotate 11:30-12:30 and 12:30 to 1:30. This is my 12:30 to 1:30 week. So I will be eating a snack at 11 or 11:30.

I am taking my lunch all this week to save money. I just hope that my finances don't run low... It is a squeak through week for me...

[Crazy Mimi]

Today seems to be going great.
I have not gone overboard on my eating. Although without leaving the office, my food is limited to what I brought in today. Which is actually good while I am trying to get some momentum going.
I have finished 61oz of water today so far. Been making frequent trips to Ladies Room.


SO - I logged my foods into an online tracker. According to them I have 580 calories remaining for the day. I have read in multiple books recently a way to figure how many calories it takes to maintain your current weight & that as long as one is not getting less than 1200 calories a day you should be losing weight. I am not soooo focused on keeping within the calorie levels as I am focused on NOT eating the wrong types of foods.
So I while I have eaten over 700 calories - my Net Carbs are at 7.5

If anyone has any suggestions on calories/Net Carbs/Fat/Fiber ratios, it is welcome...

I feel good - all the way down to my bones. That is how I know I am doing something right...

[Crazy Mimi]

I am sick and I have had a horrible headache all weekend. Couldnt sleep well and just feel like sh$t.

[Crazy Mimi]

Sometimes I wonder if I am destined to be fat all my life. I keep allowing myself to eat things that I know are not good for me. I think I may be in need of counseling to stop the eotional eating pattern.

Tuesday 8/14/12
I am starting the day off on a good foot. I can tell that I am feeling better. Lunch was good and on plan - as was breakfast. I am going to try to focus on changing my eating patterns.
I am not going to DENY myself any type of food - however, if it is NOT something that is LC I am going to keep to one or two bites and then flush the taste out with water and then chew a piece of spearmint gum...
Shopping list:
Spearmint gum - may be a case of it...

Breakfast:
egg w/bacon
1/2 tortilla

Lunch:
ham
tuna
pickles
1 oz cheddar cheese

Snack:

[Crazy Mimi]

Tuesday 8/14/12 continued...

Please do not judge me - I had a "hunger" moment - but followed with good things.

Snack:
CarbSmart yogurt
1/2 serving of almonds

Dinner:
Ravioli
vienna sausages
chips

Took a walk and drank a lot of water the rest of the night.

The ravioli is what lead to an increase in hunger IMO

[Crazy Mimi]

Breakfast:
Egg
1/2 tortilla

Lunch:
tuna
pickles
1oz cheddar cheese

Snack:
CarbSmart yogurt
almonds

Dinner:
Boneless Pork loin
vegetables

WATER, WATER, WATER, WATER,
And another walk to continue to keep things moving in the right direction.

[Crazy Mimi]

I followed my menu for yesterday! This is one of my biggest successes AND the scale reflected my efforts which helps get my momentum rolling...

8/13/12:
Drs office 280
Home 278
8/16/12:
Home 277

[Psmileyf]

No one judges you...we all struggle!

You are doing great!

[Crazy Mimi]

Paula - thank you.

My daily struggles are getting worse. I know what it revolves around, I just am not sure how to get past it or how to not stress about it; which then leads to eating wrong types of foods....

I am not giving up. Just trying to get over this hurdle...

[Crazy Mimi]

My sister-in-law passed away 6/24/12. 6/25/12 my Mother-in-law was given two to six months to live. My husband is super stressed about the latter. His sister was 49. That HAS to be weighing heavily on him as well. I do not know how to help him other than to just be there for him in his time of need.

My oldest DD is so irresponsible that I can't stand to be around her. My middle DD is still off in la-la land thinking that we will eventually come around to her living with a moocher. My youngest DD is wonderful, but my DH has trouble seeing the diamond in the rough and can only point out the negative.

I am stressed beyond belief with work situations and the above mentioned life issues. So, Monday I went for a walk and DH went along. Tuesday we went for a shorter walk (my bladder got in the way of a longer walk ), yesterday DH ducked out and I took the longest walk yet. I was walking along at a good pace, and I tested myself by talking out loud to myself. I could not carry on a conversation with myself due to getting too winded - so I think it was a good pace. Then I made it interesting. I decided that for a very short distance I would walk faster than I already was, then slow back down to the pace I was at... I did that twice... I don't know if it helps me in the long run or not. But going from not much to walking everyday is the best thing I can do for my health. I have noticed that I look forward to the walks now.

[Crazy Mimi]

Originally Posted by DesertGurl

Cindylou, keeping you and yours in my thoughts. I think the best gift you could give yourself is to love yourself the way you deserve to. People will always be there trying to derail, sabotage, whatever, maybe not always on purpose, but its always there. When you put yourself first, nothing anyone says will matter.. very hard concept to adapt, especially if you're used to always being the giver, the provider for everything.. but you need this, want this, deserve this...people will soon figure it out and be done trying to convince you that you're doing it wrong. Hang in there honey!! There is nothing wrong with being selfish when it means making a better YOU! ♥

Note to self - repost this on every Monday so that it is what I start my weeks with...

[Crazy Mimi]

Well, according my cute little calculator - I should be drowning in lemonade by now....

I am not feeling too good. Minor congestion and sinus/allergy type symptoms. I have bucked up on my vitamins.

Appetite is not where it was normally. Curious if this can stay with me....

I am going to get to a lower weight. I can do this....

[Crazy Mimi]

I am regrouping and more determined than ever to lose this baggage. I am going to lose weight, however fast or slow I lose.

[Crazy Mimi]

kendrakinnison.com/how-to-make-yourself-workout-every-day/

This is a wonderful article. You only have to "make yourself workout" until it's a habit!!!

Put some extra time into planning the next days' exercise routine so that the potential excuses and distractions are not as easy to get around.

So - I can't workout in the am until the time changes during the week. So here is my routine for now.
M-F Once home, get supper going and have DD watch it while I go for a 30 min walk
S/S Go for walk as soon as waking up, laying out my workout clothes the evening before...

This is what I am going to do.

[Crazy Mimi]

I have not weighed in a while. And the results can't be hidden. I refuse to buy larger clothing, so - Atkins Induction here I come. There is no turning back, no whining and no witching with a "B" allowed from my inner thoughts.
Before my Dad got sick I was losing, it DOES work - I was almost in the 250s when he took a turn for the worse..... I let my mind get me and once you cheat it is hard to get off that band wagon.

Well - I have the bruises to prove that I jumped off that band wagon.

It's "all or nothing" time.

[Crazy Mimi]

Breakfast:
Egg
1 slice bacon

Lunch:
Caesar Salad
Parmesan Cheese
Caesar Dressing
NO CROUTONS
1 serving lean brisket

Not sure what to have for supper. Will be thinking about it.

[Crazy Mimi]

Originally Posted by Crazy Mimi

Breakfast:
Egg
1 slice bacon

Lunch:
Caesar Salad
Parmesan Cheese
Caesar Dressing
NO CROUTONS
1 serving lean brisket

Not sure what to have for supper. Will be thinking about it.

Did not make it to the store
Snack: Atkins shake

Dinner: Vienna sausages
green beans
corn

Snack: mac & cheese I gave in. Not going to beat myself up.
This is less than I normally eat.

[Crazy Mimi]

Today's Mini goal:

DRINK TONS OF WATER & ONLY EAT INDUCTION OK FOODS

[Crazy Mimi]

Multi-vitamin & medications
Breakfast:
1 egg, scrambled (just the egg nothing added)
1 sausage patty
1/4 cup shredded cheese

No upset stomach, just felt full all the way from 8am to 12. Due to tummy issues, I am going by my stomach signals. If I don't feel hungry I am not going to eat.

Lunch:
1 atkins advantage shake
handful of jerky

Stomach bothering me now.
I know it is still from yesterday. But still.... It's aggrevating.

[Crazy Mimi]

First things first: TGIF

Multi vitamin & daily meds
Breakfast:
1 egg
2 strips bacon

Lunch - IDK to be announced.....

[Crazy Mimi]

Hurt my back Saturday evening (not even sure what I did).
Went to Dr yesterday, cortisone shot and Naproxen Sodium.
IS NOT HELPING.........
Going back today to see what else can be done - if anything.

Not really hungry. Not really thirsty. But I keep going. This morning weight is at 278. So at least I am not gaining.

[Crazy Mimi]

Dr appt update.

He does not think that an MRI is warranted at this time. He still thinks that the cortisone shot needs a little more time to take effect. He did prescribe a pain pill though. PLEASE LET IT WORK....

Good news - my weight at home is usually less than my weight at dr office. Their's is usually higher. Well, 2:30 in the afternoon, my weight was 279 at the dr office. So it means to me that either i will go down tomorrow (providing I don't eat too much) or it just means that their scale is 1 pound ahead of mine...