The rest of the story Part Two!

[Deb294evr]

Originally Posted by shari

sooo true Gracie, Maggie has an excellent point. How many times have we seen here, on tv or people we know personally get to goal and find they are still 'unhappy'? I think people are happy at that moment or for a period of time but what happens when it becomes old and you and other people are used to the newer you? What becomes the focus then?
For sure one thing is maintenance...the true test to not use food for emotional eating and really working on what's inside...however big or small...

Maggie, you are too funny..Jabba..

This was one reason I could not stay thin in the past. The WORK IS DONE, then what? People just think of you as naturally thin now? ok THINNER. I remember thinking the exact same thing. I was not really unhappy, but I was not HAPPY either.

I think we get so caught up in the journey, that when we get where we want to be, nothing WOW is there. Then we get fat again and start all over... GEEZE this has to stop!!...

[shari]

I've never made it to goal so I really know that it's something deeper for me I know deep down inside I could've made it to goal a gazillion times before now but I kept gaining weight to have further to go..what sense does that make?

[Deb294evr]

Originally Posted by shari

I've never made it to goal so I really know that it's something deeper for me I know deep down inside I could've made it to goal a gazillion times before now but I kept gaining weight to have further to go..what sense does that make?

There is something keeping you from hitting goal inside your head. I wish I had answers too, I sure could use them! WE do so much self sabatoge, but WHY? This is where the shrinks make their money...

[Meek75]

Originally Posted by Deb294evr

This was one reason I could not stay thin in the past. The WORK IS DONE, then what? People just think of you as naturally thin now? ok THINNER. I remember thinking the exact same thing. I was not really unhappy, but I was not HAPPY either.

I think we get so caught up in the journey, that when we get where we want to be, nothing WOW is there. Then we get fat again and start all over... GEEZE this has to stop!!...

I agree... when I hit goal the first time, I was like, now what? I knew of maintenance, but I didn't work hard to maintaining my goal weight. My weight fluctuated between 150-160 and I spent a lot of time still dieting when I would start to reach my peek (160). I would water fast, and do a lot of extreme things, and then the more weight I gained, the harder it became to lose it again. That's when I got pregnant and all hell broke loose after that! I started doing extreme diets afterwards and now I'm sitting in the mid 200s and can't lose anymore. If I try another diet, I will probably end up almost 250 pounds!!! The madness had to stop. I am not losing weight (I will eventually), but I'm not gaining either. Right now I am learning new things and taking a different approach, but in the process, I am embracing myself and I accept the fact that my health matters more than anything right now.

sorry to ramble.

[Deb294evr]

Originally Posted by @iamMeekness

I agree... when I hit goal the first time, I was like, now what? I knew of maintenance, but I didn't work hard to maintaining my goal weight. My weight fluctuated between 150-160 and I spent a lot of time still dieting when I would start to reach my peek (160). I would water fast, and do a lot of extreme things, and then the more weight I gained, the harder it became to lose it again. That's when I got pregnant and all hell broke loose after that! I started doing extreme diets afterwards and now I'm sitting in the mid 200s and can't lose anymore. If I try another diet, I will probably end up almost 250 pounds!!! The madness had to stop. I am not losing weight (I will eventually), but I'm not gaining either. Right now I am learning new things and taking a different approach, but in the process, I am embracing myself and I accept the fact that my health matters more than anything right now.

sorry to ramble.

This is not a ramble at all Meek, this is wonderful discussion!! I feel lots of the same things you do, and have in the past. It seems like every time I got within a good weight, I'd get pregnant... hummmm

Ok, well the last time that was not my excuse, but still. The whole dieting thing has put our bodies into such flux! It doesn't know what the heck to do. I think we need to heal it first by stopping the gain, maintaining is wonderful in my opinion. THEN we worry about getting to a HEALTHY weight.

You started me into this way of thinking although I have been here before, It just REALLY hit home this time. There is no turning back for me. No more diets. They won't work in the long run and I am fat enough..

[shari]

Meek..not a ramble it's interesting to hear other people's journey.

[Meek75]

Thanks ladies. Its not easy and I need help. I decided to call my insurance co tomorrow to get info on professional nutritionist in my area... Just as a starting point. I am sure they'll try to push the low fat diet but... Im still interesting in seeing one... and a therapist! I aint playing, I need help dealing with ALL my isssssssssues!!!

[Deb294evr]

Originally Posted by @iamMeekness

Thanks ladies. Its not easy and I need help. I decided to call my insurance co tomorrow to get info on professional nutritionist in my area... Just as a starting point. I am sure they'll try to push the low fat diet but... Im still interesting in seeing one... and a therapist! I aint playing, I need help dealing with ALL my isssssssssues!!!

There is nothing wrong with needing help!! GO FOR IT!!.. we are all rooting you on, and the more help the better!..

[12yrslater]

Good Morning Deb!

Hope you have a wonderful day

[Deb294evr]

Originally Posted by 12yrslater

Good Morning Deb!

Hope you have a wonderful day

Good Morning Pati!! I am on a mission to learn what real hunger is today... still weighing in the same this morning... Ready to move down a notch, but maintaining is good too in a way..

[12yrslater]

Originally Posted by Deb294evr

Good Morning Pati!! I am on a mission to learn what real hunger is today... still weighing in the same this morning... Ready to move down a notch, but maintaining is good too in a way..

Isn't this what is considered "Intuitive eating"? I bet if we all paid our bodies that much mind, we'd be able to control our portions/foods!! GOOD LUCK TODAY! I bet you'll do great!

[Deb294evr]

Originally Posted by 12yrslater

Isn't this what is considered "Intuitive eating"? I bet if we all paid our bodies that much mind, we'd be able to control our portions/foods!! GOOD LUCK TODAY! I bet you'll do great!

YES IT IS!!. .Intuitive Eating is what I am working on day by day. Especially today though. I didn't bring much food, so I want to see how it goes..
Thanks Pati!! hope you have a wonderful day yourself!

[Meek75]

Thanks Deb. It's Wednesday... just 2 more days until the weekend! I hope you have a good day.

[Deb294evr]

Originally Posted by @iamMeekness

Thanks Deb. It's Wednesday... just 2 more days until the weekend! I hope you have a good day.

I KNOW! this week is moving right along!! AND I don't have to go anywhere this weekend! SO EXCITED TO BE LAZY AT HOME!...

[Gracie514]

Good morning Deb! Great conversation yesterday I was thinking about it more last night too. This is so much more mental than anything!!!

[julieboolie]

I'm loving all this discussion.

Meek-THIS is my therapy Finding others here at LCFs who are "like-minded". Who truly understand the struggle, effort, mindset etc. of a lifetime dieter and can share their struggles, insights, and revelations!! I learn so much from other's journey's and incorporate it into mine. I hope you can meet with a good nutritionist who can get you pointed in the right direction. I admire you perspective on "health" and all that exercise you've made part of your "normal" life now!

Deb-you've been a pioneer, willing to go against the flow, in finding something that will work for you!! It's impressive and empowering to watch you fearlessly dabble, evaluate, change, adapt and improve. Progress, not perfection, right? I hope you can hear your body loud and clear today!! 1 day at a time.

Shari-you're right! So many of us think GOAL, and then they stop "working". Maintenance can be even tougher, as the daily "reward" of the scale stops and you are just spinning your wheels. You can't eat "like everyone else". It does take continuous effort. It's disappointing! But, at the same time, it's freeing to realize this is a new chapter in our lives. Being who we've always wanted to be. Taking control and changing our lives, and those of our families, by creating new routines, menus, lifestyles. This is where I am right now and trying to become the woman I always wished (but never really thought) I could be.

I've never really truly gotten to a good "goal" before now. The weight I am now, I weighed in 6th grade. Ever since then I have been overweight, obese or morbidly obese . I still am lightly padded so I may eventually decide to lose some more weight (the endless pursuit of thin!!) but am quite happy where I am right now. I need to stop wishing for "more" and celebrate and work to stay where I finally am. It's quite a mindset adjustment for me. 30 years of "trying to lose weight". That's a tough paradigm to shift!! But, day by day, this is what I'm trying to do.

The IE is something I am working on incorporating as well. You've inspired me to slow down the meals and really listen to my body today. Thanks!!

[12yrslater]

Originally Posted by julieboolie

I'm loving all this discussion.

Meek-THIS is my therapy Finding others here at LCFs who are "like-minded". Who truly understand the struggle, effort, mindset etc. of a lifetime dieter and can share their struggles, insights, and revelations!! I learn so much from other's journey's and incorporate it into mine. I hope you can meet with a good nutritionist who can get you pointed in the right direction. I admire you perspective on "health" and all that exercise you've made part of your "normal" life now!

Deb-you've been a pioneer, willing to go against the flow, in finding something that will work for you!! It's impressive and empowering to watch you fearlessly dabble, evaluate, change, adapt and improve. Progress, not perfection, right? I hope you can hear your body loud and clear today!! 1 day at a time.

Shari-you're right! So many of us think GOAL, and then they stop "working". Maintenance can be even tougher, as the daily "reward" of the scale stops and you are just spinning your wheels. You can't eat "like everyone else". It does take continuous effort. It's disappointing! But, at the same time, it's freeing to realize this is a new chapter in our lives. Being who we've always wanted to be. Taking control and changing our lives, and those of our families, by creating new routines, menus, lifestyles. This is where I am right now and trying to become the woman I always wished (but never really thought) I could be.

I've never really truly gotten to a good "goal" before now. The weight I am now, I weighed in 6th grade. Ever since then I have been overweight, obese or morbidly obese . I still am lightly padded so I may eventually decide to lose some more weight (the endless pursuit of thin!!) but am quite happy where I am right now. I need to stop wishing for "more" and celebrate and work to stay where I finally am. It's quite a mindset adjustment for me. 30 years of "trying to lose weight". That's a tough paradigm to shift!! But, day by day, this is what I'm trying to do.

The IE is something I am working on incorporating as well. You've inspired me to slow down the meals and really listen to my body today. Thanks!!

What a great post!

[Meek75]

I agree, Julie, GREAT POST! Thank you!!

[Deb294evr]

Originally Posted by Gracie514

Good morning Deb! Great conversation yesterday I was thinking about it more last night too. This is so much more mental than anything!!!

Thank you Gracie!! I agree this is a wonderful thought provoking conversation we are having!! We are all MENTAL!... Our minds are powerful!!

Originally Posted by julieboolie

I'm loving all this discussion.

Meek-THIS is my therapy Finding others here at LCFs who are "like-minded". Who truly understand the struggle, effort, mindset etc. of a lifetime dieter and can share their struggles, insights, and revelations!! I learn so much from other's journey's and incorporate it into mine. I hope you can meet with a good nutritionist who can get you pointed in the right direction. I admire you perspective on "health" and all that exercise you've made part of your "normal" life now!

Deb-you've been a pioneer, willing to go against the flow, in finding something that will work for you!! It's impressive and empowering to watch you fearlessly dabble, evaluate, change, adapt and improve. Progress, not perfection, right? I hope you can hear your body loud and clear today!! 1 day at a time.

Shari-you're right! So many of us think GOAL, and then they stop "working". Maintenance can be even tougher, as the daily "reward" of the scale stops and you are just spinning your wheels. You can't eat "like everyone else". It does take continuous effort. It's disappointing! But, at the same time, it's freeing to realize this is a new chapter in our lives. Being who we've always wanted to be. Taking control and changing our lives, and those of our families, by creating new routines, menus, lifestyles. This is where I am right now and trying to become the woman I always wished (but never really thought) I could be.

I've never really truly gotten to a good "goal" before now. The weight I am now, I weighed in 6th grade. Ever since then I have been overweight, obese or morbidly obese . I still am lightly padded so I may eventually decide to lose some more weight (the endless pursuit of thin!!) but am quite happy where I am right now. I need to stop wishing for "more" and celebrate and work to stay where I finally am. It's quite a mindset adjustment for me. 30 years of "trying to lose weight". That's a tough paradigm to shift!! But, day by day, this is what I'm trying to do.

The IE is something I am working on incorporating as well. You've inspired me to slow down the meals and really listen to my body today. Thanks!!

FANTASTIC POST JULIE!!!! Thank you so much for adding this!!!

Originally Posted by 12yrslater

What a great post!

TOTALLY AGREE!!!

Originally Posted by @iamMeekness

I agree, Julie, GREAT POST! Thank you!!

Julie is one smart cookie!!... Thank you all for adding such wonderful ideas and thoughts!! you are helping everyone!..

[shari]

I agree, I can't stop thinking about our discussion yesterday...I'm still going on and on in my mind, making me think of deeper things...it'll come together.

Julie~great post! You're so right...in a lot of ways coming here and keeping a journal with everyone's support and outlook has been my therapy too. However I'm so private about some things and way too leary of putting personal things 'out there' that I have internal struggles going on that I feel I can't post here. This is where I really need to dig deep and work on, maybe not alone. I keep thinking in my profession, I should know what to do and how to do it...I work with people doing this everyday but am having the hardest time doing it for myself, alone...

[julieboolie]

Thanks girls!! Sweet . I'm learning from all of you, and as I go. I like to experiment, adjust, improve and learn!! I've grown a lot in the 9 years here on LCF's. But what I've read on this thread/journal the past few days really hits home for me. It just rings true, KWIM?

Shari- i hope you can find a good counsellor who can not only listen and support you, but encourage and counsel you if you need advice too. I agree, there are certain things I can't share here either. But oddly enough, I find myself often sharing things online that I won't share w. my friends IRL. Safer b/c I'm not face-to-face? Probably!! I'm a chicken at heart . Hope you continue to wrestle with whatever is challenging you. That old saying "dead men don't wrestle" applies here. Keep fighting the good fight!!

Deb-

[shari]

Thanks Julie

[Deb294evr]

Originally Posted by shari

I agree, I can't stop thinking about our discussion yesterday...I'm still going on and on in my mind, making me think of deeper things...it'll come together.

Julie~great post! You're so right...in a lot of ways coming here and keeping a journal with everyone's support and outlook has been my therapy too. However I'm so private about some things and way too leary of putting personal things 'out there' that I have internal struggles going on that I feel I can't post here. This is where I really need to dig deep and work on, maybe not alone. I keep thinking in my profession, I should know what to do and how to do it...I work with people doing this everyday but am having the hardest time doing it for myself, alone...

I am with you there Shari, some things we really can't post on a public site, and that makes the struggle a little bit harder. I know it is hard to believe I have not spilled all my guts, but I haven't..

We can do this with all the support and help we can get though. If we need some real life outside help, hey, we just do. They say those who help others are the hardest on themselves.. well cut it out...

Originally Posted by julieboolie

Thanks girls!! Sweet . I'm learning from all of you, and as I go. I like to experiment, adjust, improve and learn!! I've grown a lot in the 9 years here on LCF's. But what I've read on this thread/journal the past few days really hits home for me. It just rings true, KWIM?

Shari- i hope you can find a good counsellor who can not only listen and support you, but encourage and counsel you if you need advice too. I agree, there are certain things I can't share here either. But oddly enough, I find myself often sharing things online that I won't share w. my friends IRL. Safer b/c I'm not face-to-face? Probably!! I'm a chicken at heart . Hope you continue to wrestle with whatever is challenging you. That old saying "dead men don't wrestle" applies here. Keep fighting the good fight!!

Deb-

Thank you again Julie!! I am so very very glad you posted here, and I hope you continue. You have some wonderful insight!.. WE can all learn from each other!

[MagieDen]

Good stuff ladies!

[12yrslater]

LMAO During the last few minutes of my day (especially when the boss isn't around ) I play....I came across this by accident! I LOVE IT!!!

[Meek75]

Originally Posted by 12yrslater

LMAO During the last few minutes of my day (especially when the boss isn't around ) I play....I came across this by accident! I LOVE IT!!!

[Deb294evr]

Originally Posted by 12yrslater

LMAO During the last few minutes of my day (especially when the boss isn't around ) I play....I came across this by accident! I LOVE IT!!!

O M G PERFECTION!!! Pati, this is awesome, I'm printing it out and putting it in my CUBE... Thanks!!!!

[12yrslater]

:LOL:

Morning!!! Hope all is well!!

Enjoy your day free of diet

[Deb294evr]

Originally Posted by 12yrslater

:LOL:

Morning!!! Hope all is well!!

Enjoy your day free of diet

Good Morning!! I came in this morning intending to catch up on LCF and got hit with a million duties!.. ARGGGG oh well, I will be back at lunch. Since I don't want to eat...

Hope everyone is having a nice morning!

[12yrslater]

Originally Posted by Deb294evr

Good Morning!! I came in this morning intending to catch up on LCF and got hit with a million duties!.. ARGGGG oh well, I will be back at lunch. Since I don't want to eat...

Hope everyone is having a nice morning!

Work always has to mess with our socializing?!?!?

TTYL