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Old 07-05-2012, 04:15 PM   #751
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Originally Posted by tay65 View Post
Hope the guy shows up!
Its steamin' out! I'm staying in today, I think. My dd may wanna do something. The bf is coming over for a while before he goes to work. I get to meet him!!!! LOL! I'll let you know what I think later. hahaha
Almost forgot! Good job with the weight loss! I'm staying the same! Idk what the issue is!
You're meeting him today??? Cool! I want to hear every impression you have, positive or negative. First impressions are telling but they don't tell all.

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Originally Posted by suzi7 View Post


I assume he's been there n the a.c is gone?? cuz I've been praying... lol

if so, double good!!
Thanks for the prayers! They worked. He bought it but he was picking the dang thing apart first. He started saying, "Where the (blank)" and "there's a pole outside the window that might be a problem." I told him that I gave him the dimensions and that if the unit wasn't right for him that the price is staying the same. He got all defensive and said it wasn't the price. Yeah, right.

The guy he was with asked if there was a discrete place where he could go relieve himself outside. I told him he could go back behind the shed but warned him he was venturing back there at his own risk. I have not mowed the lawn one time this year and it is a jungle. So as he's walking back there, he asks me if I sold the house. I said, "All information will be given on a need to know basis." (Standard military talk and quite funny.) He didn't think it was funny and got all apologetic but not in a gracious way.

I couldn't WAIT for these guys to buy it or not buy it, just LEAVE. I had to string three long orange extension cords from the neighbor's home to get power to the a/c unit. That cut down on the available amperage and affected the way the unit was running. So they start telling me that was not a good idea and I could have harmed the a/c. I told him (them) that I thought they'd like to see it running and that was the only way it was going to happen.

So they loaded it into the back of their truck and they backed into the neighbor's driveway to eliminate two of the three cords. They decided (FINALLY) that they would take it. Never was I so happy. (Well, not since the last painful sale involving the last person to come and buy some of my crap.)

I am so DONE with selling things by appointment. I'm going to have to force myself to do what is necessary to get the rest of my stuff gone. I am going to watch the weather report like a hawk and prepare for the moving sale during those days. I don't know how much longer I will have access to the house and though much time has passed, I know foreclosures take time and then some.

To top everything else off, I was there talking with my favorite neighbors at 3 pm (the ones loaning me the electricity.) I finally asked her what was up with all the witches around her house. She looked at me and said, "I'm a witch. No, really. I practice Wicca and I'm a witch." I'm sure my eyes popped right out of my head, though I tried to squelch my shock and horror. But apparently she's a good witch and believes that what you put "out there" you get back times three.

But I come home around 5:30 and find a dead gardener snake in front of my steps! I am not kidding around here. It was a small gardener and it was dead as a door nail but there was no sign of trauma. I know the dog upstairs kills snakes but the last one he shook so violently that it came apart. This one was pristine. The only thing was its mouth was gaping open a little.

I don't even want to ask the woman about it. I don't want to know if she asked the universe to show itself to me and prove a point. I don't even want to give her the satisfaction or reinforce her beliefs in any way whatsoever. You know?

So the good news is that I'm down 1.6 lbs today, I sold my a/c unit, have deposited $200 into my bank account (that pays for my nursing license renewal and also the DVDs I'm going to buy on Amazon; addicted to a Canadian TV series called "Heartland." Can find on Netflix but the seasons are missing some episodes. Still a wonderful intro to Heartland.) Other good news is that the Sheriff hasn't put a lock on my old abode. All is right with the world.

I won't let this Wicca stuff get in the way of my friendship with them. The husband is the one I've had the most contact with all those years and he's not into that at all. I am guessing he's still a Christian but how could he stay married to someone who is a self-proclaimed pagan? I'll never understand how two people can stay tightly joined together in this life when one of them knows darn well that when the next life comes around, they part company. And how they can lay down in the same bed without trying to convert the other one is beyond me.

So like I was sayin, I got $250 for the air conditioner. I put $200 in the bank to off-set the costs of the nursing license and the DVDs I'm going to order (very soon.) The $50 I had left went into my wallet and I bought a case of Molson Golden Beer. $30 gone leaving $20 left to add to the $15 I already had in my wallet. So that leaves me $35 for buying some needed things such as more cream for my iced coffees (made me some today and they aren't bad at all!) and other necessities. I might get through this month with still some $$$ left over to add to the kitty.

I don't even want to wager a guess at how long this dang post is, but there it is! Nothing dull about my life, eh? Oh! And the old neighborhood 4th of July party isn't until this Saturday so I'm going to attend. Free food and booze!!! I'll be there! And I found out that my other neighbor (old neighborhood still) is having a birthday party for her son on the 21st. Going to that one, too. So glad I didn't commit to Saturdays at the Farm!!! (WHEW)
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Old 07-05-2012, 05:02 PM   #752
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Oh Cheryl I AM glad the a/c unit sold and you no longer are wondering how you will feed yourself for the next couple of weeks! And good news that you found some ointment for that rash.
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Old 07-05-2012, 05:35 PM   #753
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Way to focus on the positive, Plum! Yes, those are all great developments. But what did you think about my neighborhood witch?
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Old 07-05-2012, 07:08 PM   #754
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O.M.G.!!!! A witch? I have to say I've met some women I've called witches, but not one who called herself a witch! LOL! You never knew? It's funny that she finally told you AFTER you moved. And about the husband....they say opposites attract. Obviously its not an issue.
Ok! About the bf now. First impression. He was nice, looked into my eyes when he spoke to me, was very happy to see my daughter and chloe (as they were to see him) and friendly and he seems easy to talk to. Now we just need to spend more time with him. I watched him play with Chloe too. When it was time for him to leave for work, she cried & cried.
Did I tell you I bought hubby a grill yesterday? Today we had fish cooked on it. Mmmm I missed his grillin'. LOL
Free food and beer! Who can pass that up! Well, I can pass on the beer! Yuk! I'm a mixed drink person. I tried to have a beer yesterday but took 2 swallows and dumped it. Back when I was young I could pretty much drink any beer! Now, forget it.
Your saturday's are filling up fast! Good for you! You keep your license? Just in case, huh? My mom is a retired RN. She was forced to retire when she was going thru chemo and radiation. She tried to work, but it just drained her. She was 62. She'll be 66 in August. She had breast cancer, first in the family to have it. So now that makes me a little nervous!
Glad that guy finally took the a/c! geeze! They were pains in the butt! Idk if I would've been so patient.
Oh! The dead garder snake! Creepy! EEK! Idk what to think about that!
well, gonna watch some HGTV!
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Old 07-05-2012, 07:39 PM   #755
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Way to focus on the positive, Plum! Yes, those are all great developments. But what did you think about my neighborhood witch?
About the witch....and the snake....well um....

LOL!
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Old 07-05-2012, 07:39 PM   #756
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Sounds perfect, Tammy! I'm so happy for your daughter, for Chloe and for all of you that she met a wonderful, Christian guy. I wish I could say the same for myself. Not that I'm looking, but the only way I'd ever get involved again is with a Church-going, upstanding guy. One who would make me a better person by his stellar example.

Yep, you told me about the grill. I think three times! I'm glad you got it home and that people helped you load (and hopefully unload) it.

If a nurse lets her license lapse and she decides she ever wants to return to nursing, she has to pass the boards all over again! No freaking way am I letting that happen. I will keep it current until the day I croak.

Yes, once breast cancer appears in your family tree, everyone needs to check their branches regularly. Sorry. Hahahaha! It's the beer I drank. Well, if your mom is retired, that's one thing. But I'm only turning 50 and have many years (God willing) left to provide for myself. Right now I have disability but I never know when that will be taken away. I pray it never will be, but things are tightening up with government paychecks.

Oh, Tammy. I'm anything but patient. I try to be diplomatic and kind and patient but I just lose my temper with these people who are coming into my home and basically invading my personal space and asking me personal questions. I said I moved out. Look around, people. Is the house empty? Is there a for sale sign outside? Engage your brain and don't just try to fill space and time with moronic questions.

Enjoy your HGTV. I used to love watching all those shows! I still will, now that I've gotten that entire home-ownership thing out of my system. I can look back and say, Been there, Done that!

I got some surprises in the mail today so my momentary relief of having cash in hand is now over. I got a car tax bill of $101 and then a Real Estate Tax bill for over $1K! I am NOT paying that. I'm calling the lawyer first thing next week. I need to know what my options are when in bankruptcy/foreclosure regarding taxes and such. Good heavens!

Yep, snake was creepy. It was just a harmless little gardener snake but it was the circumstances that made it spooky. Makes you stop and wonder, ya know?

Night! This time I mean it.
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Old 07-05-2012, 07:40 PM   #757
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About the witch....and the snake....well um....

LOL!
Uh huh!
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Old 07-06-2012, 05:31 PM   #758
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STS today but I ate a bunch yesterday, and drank regular beer (lots of it, too.) Not gaining is a plus!

I got up today, but too late to shop at the food pantry. I knew what I was doing but I just couldn't make myself get up in time. I was up past 3 am and when I finally fall asleep, I'll do just about anything to hang onto it. Next Tuesday around 5 pm, they are open for two hours. I'll shop then.

I got a TON of house work done today. The landlady was coming to mow so I went out and did the doggy poop patrol, then went inside to do dishes and make the house presentable in case she asked to use the bathroom. Seems she only does that if I've gone outside to greet her. If I lay low, she never knocks. Nice to know!

But the house is cleaner than it has ever been since I first moved in. I finally took a feather duster and beat the crap out of all the blinds. They were nasty from the get-go. I did all the dishes, which were beginning to pile up, cleaned off some cluttered areas and now order is back! Went through all the rooms and vacuumed, dusted, wiped things down, etc. It was as if I was expecting company. Now I can sit back and relax all weekend, in my very clean and tidy home.

Found yet another dead animal outside! A baby Opossum. It was clearly bitten but it was left underneath my kitchen bay window, in the flower bed. This is too weird. Two days in a row, two dead animals just outside my door? And right after learning that my old neighbor is a witch?

I spun my mattress and flipped all my bedding today, too. Paid some bills and put them into the mailbox to go out tomorrow. And tomorrow around dark, I'll be heading over to my old neighborhood for the annual 4th of July block party. I am psyched! Will have to buy some good bug spray before I go. Tired of being eaten alive!

Today I ate nothing except two iced coffees with cream. Then I started in on some more beer after I finished all my cleaning and organizing. Will be another mellow night. (Forgot to say that I made some mashed taters for dinner. Yummy!)

Living without sleeping pills is doable, but I might have to just accept the fact that I don't sleep as normal people do. I will have to adjust to being up half the night and sleeping until noon, as if I worked second shift or something. I am willing to make that compromise in order to stay off that crap.

All I need to do right now is slide on into the shower and get cleaned off of all the sweat I produced today. Then slide on into fresh pj's and turn the washing machine on. Then I can slip off to sleep on my nicer side of the bed and wake up all refreshed. Ahhhhh...

So, how are the rest of you doing today?????

ETA: Also decided to spring for life insurance, since it goes UP after I turn 50. That's only a few weeks from now, so I took that bait. Now have $50K to help out my family after I'm gone.

Last edited by CherylB; 07-06-2012 at 05:35 PM..
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Old 07-07-2012, 01:45 AM   #759
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Had my share of beer too so I haven't eaten in two days.. Just not hungry. I'm ten pounds away from my goal. Don't think I'm gonna make it! I'm old! Just wanted to say that I enjoy your blog!
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Old 07-07-2012, 09:43 AM   #760
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Ten lbs from goal? I'm green with envy! Lucky you, but I know it didn't have anything to do with luck. Just hard work and dedication. WTG!! And KUTGW. Thanks for joining in. (I'm "old", too.)

Well, I enjoyed those mashed 'taters too much and ate the whole batch over the course of the day and evening. It didn't seem like terribly much but I know how many potatoes I used and it was more than any one person should eat in one day. So I'm up 0.8 today but it will leave tomorrow. I will be careful today.

But that might be hard, considering the neighborhood 4th of July block party happens today! It starts at 3 but I won't go until closer to dark, when they will light off their fireworks. I'll bring the pooch, naturally. She'll be so happy to be knee-deep in people. She's such a people person!

Made a big batch of coffee yesterday and put it in the refrigerator so I'd have a full pitcher for iced coffees. However, it was the wrong pitcher for that purpose cause it got off-balanced and ended up hitting the floor and spilling everywhere! Coffee disaster. I mopped it all up and was able to right the pitcher in time to save about 1/3 of it. (Good thing the towel I used was brown already. ) Now I need to brew yet another pot. From now on I'll be using a more secure pitcher. Just have to get over the fact that it will be forever stained by coffee and tea and just use it for those two things.

I slept like a baby last night! Must have been because I spun the mattress. It is much less shabby than the other side I was sleeping on. Almost like having a new bed! I promised myself that when I reached goal weight, I'd buy a brand new, quality mattress. Lucky for me (again; luck had nothing to do with it. Just lack of hard work and determination ) I have time to save up for it.

I've set a date to work on getting the other house set up for the moving sale. My sister said she can come next Friday to help me, so I'll have the moving sale that weekend. I'll put large, attractive things out in the front lawn to get people to stop, and then I'll have signs beckoning the shoppers to come inside the house for the rest. I hate lugging all sorts of stuff outside only to lug it back in at the end of the day.

So that means that I need to go out a few days before and get things organized. I will only have stuff in three rooms; the great room, the kitchen and the fire place room. And I'll have my sister help me carry things down from upstairs. That is too much for me to do alone.

I've been thinking about going fishing soon, too. Now that I paid all that money to join the Fish and Game, I need to start catching some dinners. Plus it's free food! Well, free cause I already paid but you know what I mean. Free from that moment on for one full year. I will do what I've seen and whack their heads on a stone to mercifully and quickly put them out of their fright and misery. I'll learn how to gut them and learn to get over that. I'll wear gloves if I can. Nurses can do anything with gloves on.

So, I hope all of us have a wonderful weekend and that we lose a little more of our weight every day!!!
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Old 07-07-2012, 11:25 AM   #761
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Hi Cheryl ! I have time now since chloe is gone for the day with her dad. She was happy to go "bye bye"! She kept yelling bye as he was putting her in his car. Too cute! Feels weird though with her gone. My daughter worked 8-1 today then she came home and got dressed for a wedding. So she's gone for a while. I guess her and the bf will be here later.
Hubby ordered us food. I got a steak n cheese sub with bacon! Mmmm Then he got pizza for later. He got wings and didn't like them. He said they were too fatty. Oh wellll....
Neighbors invited us out back for a party later. I won't go. Its too darn hot! I'm staying in the a/c nice and cool.
I hope you get your things sold at your sale. At least most of it.
Have fun at the block party! ttys!
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Old 07-07-2012, 11:45 AM   #762
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How cute! I hope she stays just as happy for their whole day together. I know how much they must treasure her. I hope all goes well. May she be safe and content today.

Sounds like an UP day to me! I don't know if I'm going to go to the block party. It's oppresively hot here this weekend too, and we are having a storm system blowing through right now. Severe scattered T-storms warning until 7 pm. I might just stay inside in my comfy, cool, dry, bug-free home, too. It would have been fun but too many things going against it. Maybe I'll drop by later for the fireworks (after dark.)

Enjoy your day of being granddaughter-less. I know you'll miss her but take full-advantage of the time apart and do something that would be hard with her there.
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Old 07-07-2012, 02:07 PM   #763
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Know what I'm doing? NOTHING! Now thats hard to do with her here! hahahaha I'm watched the last episode of True Blood I missed. Now I'm watching How to lose a guy in 10 days, which I've seen before. But its funny.
We're getting storms here later also. Much needed and will cool it down 10* tomorrow. wow.... LOL My flower on the porch is dead! Just couldn't remember to water it. A green thumb is one thing I'm missing.
Yeah, its an UD. I've had many lately. I'm frustrated. I follow the calories and everything and had a 3 lb loss the first wk. Now, nothing. I'm maintaining for pete's sake!!!!
I'd do the drops again, but not ready for the constipation and side effects I get. But I think if I really want to lose weight, I'm gonna have to bite the hHCG Bullet. LOL
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Old 07-07-2012, 07:53 PM   #764
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Well, doing nothing IS something you can't do when Chloe is there, so KUDO'S to you! Doing nothing is sometimes the best thing that can happen to a person.

It wasn't nearly as hot here as they predicted and the storms kind of whimped out on us. We got a light sprinkle but the cloud cover acted to keep the heat of the sun from reaching the earth. It barely reached 80! It was a great 4th of July bash. Yep! I went. Just got home, in fact. Took Cisco and let her off her leash after a while. She stayed right with us and never strayed. Why would she? She didn't have to roam in order to find love and affection and treats.

She was on her best behavior and I'm so proud to say I'm her Mom. ( ) It's great to be home now and I got a lot of hopefully good video and I'll be able to upload them to my computer and burn them onto a DVD. I wish it were that simple. I have some major problems technologically-speaking. I will try. That's about all I can do.

Happy that I'm in for the duration of the weekend. Know darn well I will be up again on the scale tomorrow. Ate two cheese burgers on buns at the party, several beers (not sure how many), and some cupcakes and brownies, etc. It was a very nice party.

The best part of all is it didn't cost me a dime!!! Right on plan with my monthly budget. Hate to sound like a cheap-scate but that's what I need to become.

Night, ladies! God bless you and keep you safe. Tammy, how did Chloe do today?
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Old 07-08-2012, 08:25 AM   #765
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I lost a post last night and it was sooo long! Geeze!
So now I don't wanna post it all over! But to sum it up chloe's day wasn't so great. Her dad is just so dumb! He had her out in the heat and sun without sunscreen, he barely fed her, didn't give her enough to drink.....it goes on and on. Idk if my daughter will send her this saturday. She let him have it! He said he tried to give her milk. Then last night it occured to me he said he bought her sippy cups. She will only drink out of the soft top ones (they are similar to bottle nipples). I sent 2 cups with her, why couldn't he just let her drink out of her own cups! So in 7 hrs she only drank 5 ozs of juice I sent in the one cup. He barely fed her too. She came home and drank about 12 ozs of milk and ate. I was livid!
I dont know why he finds it so difficult. Just feed her and give her milk! He could've tried giving her drinks out of a regular cup. Oh welll.
So.....my neighbors had a party last night. I didn't hear a thing! I fell asleep with Chloe about midnight. My daughter and her bf were at the party then went to his sister's. She came home at 9 this morning and took chloe over there. They'll be back about 12:30 she said. Nice & quiet here.
Glad ya had a good time at the block party. I haven't been to one in ages. LOL Sounds like ur dog enjoyed himself too.
Its hot again today. I'm so over this heat wave! I'm ready for fall NOW. My fav time of yr.
Just washing towels and sheets today. Nothing new going on.
ttys!
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Old 07-08-2012, 02:22 PM   #766
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Wow, Tammy. Wasn't it him and his mother caring for her? Are they both dense? That's too bad. I'm glad she wasn't hurt and was just hungry and thirsty when she got home. Who knows what else they aren't capable of?

Yes, the block party was very fun. I managed to upload all the videos I took yesterday and burned a DVD to give to them as a thank-you for having me as a guest. (Cisco is a girl, BTW.)

I'm glad now that all the festivity-type things are over with. No more dietary hurdles until my birthday. I'm thinking about doing a short hhcg round. It would end right before I turn 50. Maybe I could lose 15 lbs in that 21 days or so. I would still rogue it but I just want to lose a bit faster than regular dieting will allow. I opened up a new bottle of pellets so I guess I'm committed. Today is a load.

I was going to keep my mouth shut about it in case it is another failed attempt. Here I am blabbing about it and I haven't taken the first loading dose!! I have plenty of meat in the freezer so I won't have to spend much money. I'll just do it low carb and low fat.

I feel not only have I lost all the weight I gained (that didn't come out right). Not only have I regained a lot of the weight I lost, but I've lost the lower set point that I had achieved. Now my body is happy in the low 90's and that's too friggin high. I have to do something drastic, at least for a short time.

I hope you're having a lovely day! Off to try and get caught up on the other threads. But I'm not blabbing about another round of hhcg on any thread but this one. It will our little secret.
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Old 07-08-2012, 03:15 PM   #767
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Yeah, I didn't know what sex your dog was so it's the norm to say him. Now I think I can remember! LOL
My daughter says thats the reason why they will not have chloe all night.
Today was hot again. My a/c just runs and runs. I've just done 3 loads of wash and I have my last in the dryer. Other than that I layed around watching tv.
Tomorrow morning the car has to get towed to the mechanic. The timer is off & it won't start. On Friday my husband went to the store and had to get it towed home. So all weekend hes used my dd's car. Well, not yesterday bc she went to a wedding & reception.
Well, wish ya lotsa luck with your round! Focus! LOL Easier said than done. I know.
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Old 07-08-2012, 04:19 PM   #768
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I despise the dog-days of summer. I like Fall and Spring but Spring is my favorite. Summer has to be my least favorite of them all. I'm sorry you have to have the car towed. I hope it isn't too much money and hope they get it back to you as soon as they can.

Yes; much easier said than done. But I will try to remind myself that it's only for the shortest round recommended and then I have a nice P3 for my birthday (but we all know I'll do a refeed.) Let's be honest.

Have a nice night.
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Old 07-09-2012, 06:22 PM   #769
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Got a new horse at the therapy center! He's been there since Friday and nobody sent out an email letting the rest of us know. I pulled into the parking lot for my usual barn duty shift and saw this black and white horse in the paddock.

He's 13 years old and has foundered but is doing better. He's currently on quarantine which is what they do for new horses to protect the horses we've already got. I don't think it lasts long, though. His name is Cowboy and he's a lover! Very sweet and friendly.

He was FILTHY too. I groomed him and he has that deep, ground-in dirt. Like an area rug that needs to be taken outside and shaken? Yeah. That bad. He's a little thin and his hooves have some cracking in the "toe" region but I was told that is partly from foundering. Is that true?

He has to wear a feed basket on his face when he grazes in areas with longish grass, to keep him from eating too fast. (Excuse my ignorance here. I'm just repeating what I've been told by another young girl who is also just learning as we go.)

He's part Quarter Horse and part Tennessee Walking Horse but I would have just thought he was a Paint. He is a gorgeous animal and he's being "free leased" to us. If he works out, that is. Hopefully he will. He looks so amiable.

I worked my tail off there today. I cleaned all the paddocks and picked through four of the stalls (well 6 of them, now that I'm thinking of it.) I then helped the two dudes that were unloading more bales of hay from the fields. I offered to count bales as they were being taken off the truck but then I saw how one guy had to keep hopping up into the trailer to throw off more bales, then haul them each over to the guy in the loft. I felt guilty so I said I'd do the hay-unloading and keep the count.

It wasn't long and I was WASTED! I had to keep from losing the little clipboard and pen. There was no place to really put them and it was a hassle. So considering how tired I was getting, I just went back to counting. I went inside to bring the guys out some cold water to drink and then we were taking a break. After that, it was 6 pm and time to do other things. I told them, "I hate to 'bale' on you, but I need to do the usual stuff." They were so nice.

I am just dragging my @$$ right now. I came home and took out the trash and recyclables cause the pick-up is happening tomorrow, then I watered all the parched plants outside. It was all I could do to get out of my dirty, sweaty clothes and get cleaned up.

Tomorrow I go out there and do it all again. I can't wait for summer to be over
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Old 07-10-2012, 10:52 AM   #770
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Got my second equine care day today. I wish it was cooler outside. I need to buy myself one of those goofy hats that has an umbrella over it! Make your own shade.

I'm doing well at keeping calories low so far. Not weighing because I have seen these high numbers enough to last me a lifetime. I'll weigh once a week or so, just to see what the trend is.

My sister offered to help me with my moving sale this Friday and both days over the weekend so after today, I'll be focusing all my energy over there. I am going to set things up inside the house for the most part and just put some good, rain-proof things out in the front lawn (just to tempt people to park and come inside.) It's supposed to rain this weekend and I don't want to ruin stuff just to have it outside.

Whatever is left after this weekend will likely be given away or donated to a charity. I'll get a receipt and use it for my tax deduction (if indeed the house is foreclosed on this year.) I think sometimes of all the money I could have set aside if I had stayed in the house these past few months, but I just had to try and get this duplex. I'm so happy that I went for it, but I can't help but see dollar signs when I remember how I was paying ZERO for rent over there.

It's much better this way, though. I no longer have to worry about where I'll be moving to, wondering what to sell and what to take with me, etc. Life is really good over here, on the other side of the Fish and Game pond.

When I'm over at the house tomorrow, I'll leave Cisco home and load up the car with boxes of books and kitchen things and other stuff I still want to bring over here. I'm going to keep it to a minimum, though. I already feel I have all that I'm going to need. Why clutter up the cabinets and drawers and closets if I don't really need to?

All I need now is for the temps to stay lowish and for there to be a breeze blowing through the windows over there as I work. Since there is no electricity or water turned on over there anymore, I am at the mercy of the elements.

Have a nice day, ladies! I'm going to go have a bite to eat and then get ready for the barn. I have a whopper of a bug bite on my left forearm. It's like a huge, hard bee sting. I will not complain when summer ends.
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Old 07-10-2012, 04:09 PM   #771
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You really got bit! I don't know the last time I was bitten by anything. LOL
I hope your sale goes the way you want it to. And the rain stays way.
No pellets today in the mail. They def should be here tomorrow so sending my dd to the store for cheesecake, pepperoni and ice cream! hahahaha My legs are hurting too much to go. The walk yesterday & today with Chloe has turned them to mush. I go Thurs morning to the pain dr. My usual visit. I have to tell them I have to hold off going to see the physiatrist bc of insurance change. It'll cost so much! Idk how I'll ever afford going to these specialists.
Well, gonna rest and relax. I'm so tired. THATS another story! Will tell later.
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Old 07-10-2012, 04:54 PM   #772
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Sorry your pellets didn't come today, but sounds like you've got a fun load underway! That's the best part of the diet, anyway. At least that has become my thoughts about it all. I'm really sorry you are in so much pain. Are you going to tell him (the Dr) that you ran out and had to go completely without anything for "x" number of days? Maybe he needs to increase the dosage or change it to something you haven't built up a tolerance to.

Barn day #2 done for the week. Got some more bites, equally huge and hard. This newest one is on my forehead! Good thing I wear bangs. It looks and feels like someone hit me in the head with a bat and left an egg behind. I wear the bug spray but as I sweat and wipe my sweaty places, I need to reapply it. I am going to really work harder at keeping the bugs at bay because it takes way too long for them to mend.

My injured toe on my left foot had been doing much better, but the past day or two, it's back to feeling and looking terrible. It must really be broken and all the "hiking" in boots at the farm and pushing loaded wheelbarrows up hills must be agravating the situation. I hope it is much better soon because I have a ton of stuff to do at the old home.

I'm bombing out on this latest attempt at hhcg, too. I just can't stick to anything these days. I'm so tired of "failures to launch" that I almost want to just stop trying. My heart's not in it, so I'm wasting my time. Whatever bottom I need to reach in order to stoke the dying embers of the fire within me, I guess I'll just have to get that low.

You know, I've done this diet and that diet, all my freakin adult life. Maybe I need to just do it the old fashioned way. Eat less, burn bunches of calories. It works for the Biggest Loser peeps, so maybe I need to just try something that isn't so "diet-like." I went to the food pantry tonight after the barn and I got a good amount of food, but it's all stuff that is considered "bad food." Hey! Bad food or not, it's free.

I came home and ate two slices of blueberry pie. I nuked them and they were warm and comforting, just like they came right out of the oven. I also stopped at the local grocery store after the food pantry, to buy a few things. That turned into a $50 shopping trip. I need to just GROW UP!!!

Get some rest, Tammy. You can tell me your story about being tired tomorrow if you'd prefer. I'll be heading over to the old house at some point tomorrow, to get things organized. Will take a miracle.

Last edited by CherylB; 07-10-2012 at 04:58 PM..
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Old 07-11-2012, 11:30 AM   #773
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WOW CheryB...WOW is all I can say! I have spent the last couple hours, reading a good part of your journal. I have to say YOU are an amazing person and have accomplished so much AND have been through so much. I heard something the other day and it bears repeating, somehow I know that you have experienced this ...God is not angry with you , he is looking for ways to bless you and lift you up! You are such a wonderful encourager of others, I want to just encourage you You will make your goal, you have come so far and I am so glad to be able to get to know you Have an awesome week!!! Hang in there. A bit about me is on my blog. webpageEmBee's Place | There is a place for you!
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Old 07-11-2012, 11:32 AM   #774
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Ooops just Embee’s Blog | EmBee's Place Embee’s Blog | There is a place for you! that will take you to the blog
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Old 07-11-2012, 12:42 PM   #775
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Wow, EmBee. That's some high-praise. Did you read both of my journals or just this second half? I had much better results and was able to stay the course so much better on Journal #1. Lately (and I mean for a long time), I just have lost that fire.

I hope you can share your first name with me. It's so much more personal to know a persons' name. I have a hard time putting a face to a name with a made-up name.

I'm a very slow reader but I will try to go over your journal. If it's as monsterouls as mine are, I won't even try.
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Old 07-11-2012, 12:53 PM   #776
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CherylB View Post
Wow, EmBee. That's some high-praise. Did you read both of my journals or just this second half? I had much better results and was able to stay the course so much better on Journal #1. Lately (and I mean for a long time), I just have lost that fire.

I hope you can share your first name with me. It's so much more personal to know a persons' name. I have a hard time putting a face to a name with a made-up name.

I'm a very slow reader but I will try to go over your journal. If it's as monsterouls as mine are, I won't even try.
I read most of both You will get the fire back.

My name ...EmBee / short for MB / MaryBeth alot of my good friends do call me MB, I just thought the stretched out spelling was unique. My recent entry isn't very long and gives a general idea of what my journey has been like. There are other entries about silly things. There are a few pics too.
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Old 07-11-2012, 02:13 PM   #777
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Oh! Okay. I'll remember that because the equine manager where I volunteer goes by M.E. (short for mary ellen.)

I just read your most recent entry. That is one classy blog! You can really see a difference in that red dress that used to fit not long ago. I'm excited for you to be so excited! I was the same way in my first round. I did over 80 days of VLC but put a few refeed days into the mix so I could still enjoy my life and family get togethers. After a day off plan, I'd just do a liquid fast (water and coffee; black) and if I got hungry by the evening hours before bed, I'd eat an apple. Next day I got right back on plan and in three days, all the refeed weight was gone and I was losing more "virgin" weight.

I don't know why I'm so down on myself lately. I have several factors playing into the soup but I think mostly it is that I have been let-down at the therapeutic riding place. I had hopes of climbing the ladder, making an impression, carving out a niche for myself there and eventually being hired. But clearly they lean toward barley adult type kids with lots of horse experience. It makes me feel old and washed-up.

So, I stopped trying so hard to impress. My demeanor became dulled. And the end result will be (if I keep thinking this way), that nobody in their right mind over there would ever hire me. Don't get me wrong. I still work my tail off when I'm there and I get annoyed that the other volunteers don't take it as seriously. But I work as if I AM being paid. That's just how I'm built.

The final nail in the coffin also seems to be equine-related. When I decided to start taking riding lessons there and discovered that it was not possible due to severe hip pain, I could no longer see the younger person inside of me. The one I used to be that I thought I was striving to become again, only better. Then I just felt OLD.

I have to regroup somehow and turn this whole thing around. I believe in those "self-fulfilling prophecies" that happen because we project the sort of energy that causes things to be fulfilled. I know if I keep on this way, that is exactly what I will get. I want good things to happen and I believe that they can, but more and more, I'm thinking and fearing that they won't.

This spiral is what I'm caught up inside right now and I'm desperate to get out of it. I will pray and do some soul-searching and see what I can do today and tomorrow and every day thereafter to take me back on the right road; the one that leads where I want to go.

Last edited by CherylB; 07-11-2012 at 02:16 PM..
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Old 07-11-2012, 02:33 PM   #778
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Thanks about the blog...I love computer things and pictures, plus I am determined to proved to myself I can do things ..hahahaha. A friend of my offered to make me a webpage for a discounted price of $1000 (who has that) LOL.

I understand the frustration about the horse riding lessons. I am going through that a little bit with the "pain in the butt" that reoccurs. I have decided I am more than the things I cannot do ... It really is about changing your mind . Renewing your mind to the beautiful things (there are some) and staying focused on them, plus on how far you have come . Well I am glad I am here now ...I will help encourage you and LISTEN
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Old 07-11-2012, 02:51 PM   #779
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Thank you.

$1000??? Discount?? Please! Do you have to pay to keep that blog? It looks too nice to be free. By "pain in the butt", do you mean Sciatica? That can be terrible. I'm hoping that my hip problems will improve as the weight comes off, but until I get back with the program, that remains a pipe dream.
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Old 07-11-2012, 02:54 PM   #780
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Just got invited to an amusement park tomorrow; my sister's treat. I'm going to take her up on it. We'll be there from 10am to 1:30pm and it will be fun. I like amusement parks best at night but it will be a fun time with my sister and our great-nephew. He's getting so grown up so fast.
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