Starting RIGHT NOW-my journey

[Garden]

You'll do it! Look at this as your new starting point and move on! YOU CAN TAKE CONTROL AND DO IT !!!

[Luca]

Thanks Susan! YOU ARE doing so awesome btw!
It means a lot to get support whenever & wherever I can.
I've struggled with eating and self-esteem issues almost my whole life.
LC lifestyle has been the only time where I felt in control, happy and seen progress. Not many people around who have gone thru something similar so it is nice to have people on LCF be so supportive.
I am a stress and emotional eater, so I am a work in progress.
Today, I am home with the kiddos and trying to organize the chaos that ensued because of Christmas. I want to make a good crockpot soup tonight & just get things done around the house in as much of "relaxed" way as possible.

[Luca]

Weighed in at 158.8 today.
Not where I wanted to be but at least I am changing direction on the scale again.
I am learning again how vigilant I still have to be at this stage of my weight loss. The reality is I am NOT in maintain. mode. I still have 20-25 pounds to lose. I think I am allowing myself to subconsciously be "content" or "ok" with my success so far OR just getting lazy. I also think I am forgetting the HARD WORK it takes to lose. It's a delicious way to eat but still requires thought, planning and diligence.

SO, not only do I have to find my discipline again for my graduate studies but also my weight loss, exercising & motherhood.

This new year I want to find that again....I am a true believer that hard work DOES pay off. The rewards can really be endless. Thus far, my weight loss has contributed to me being happier & healthier. Being able to fit into clothes and walk with my head held up higher has been a HUGE change in my life. I don't want to forget that feeling ..EVER. I also believe it is mind over matter. I do not want to settle for mediocrity....

[Garden]

Originally Posted by Luca

Weighed in at 158.8 today.
Not where I wanted to be but at least I am changing direction on the scale again.
I am learning again how vigilant I still have to be at this stage of my weight loss. The reality is I am NOT in maintain. mode. I still have 20-25 pounds to lose. I think I am allowing myself to subconsciously be "content" or "ok" with my success so far OR just getting lazy. I also think I am forgetting the HARD WORK it takes to lose. It's a delicious way to eat but still requires thought, planning and diligence.

SO, not only do I have to find my discipline again for my graduate studies but also my weight loss, exercising & motherhood.

This new year I want to find that again....I am a true believer that hard work DOES pay off. The rewards can really be endless. Thus far, my weight loss has contributed to me being happier & healthier. Being able to fit into clothes and walk with my head held up higher has been a HUGE change in my life. I don't want to forget that feeling ..EVER. I also believe it is mind over matter. I do not want to settle for mediocrity....

BRAVO !!!
I love the way you said that! When I read the word "vigilant", I thought to myself, "That's the most appropriate word to use regarding weight loss efforts!" If we do not consciously think about what our hands are putting into our mouths, we will never reach our goals! I love LC, but I don't let myself go over board on calories and fat. I've got to keep the numbers low in order to see progress. I've been logging my food intake and it has helped me greatly these past couple of weeks.

[Psmileyf]

You are doing great! It is so hard to stay with this.

I ran some quick numbers...you are down over 22% of your total weight!
Last year at this time you were down 13.5%, so you've done a great job in 2012!

[Luca]

Thanks Paula! I know this is the right eating lifestyle for me for many reasons so I am definitely going to keep at it. Hoping for 2013 to be even better!
I weighed in at 158.4 today.

[Garden]

You're doing great!!!

[Luca]

I debated whether to post my weight and type anything about "resolutions" but I figured I needed to start the year off w. honesty and hope.
I weighed in at a disturbing 164. I ate "munchies" last night at my SIL and drank some wine. Today, I WILL detox. I feel like crap. The whole morning will be liquids, water and coffee. If I am hungry in the afternoon, it will be all induction food. I have a long week ahead as far as getting back on track but I know being back at work and on a schedule will help.....

Some resolutions for me this year:
1. Use my treadmill again (at least 3x a week)
2. Stick to low carb more faithfully, try more lc recipes (weekends, holidays)
3. Spend more quality time w. kids and as a family
4. Finish grad school (w. out stressing sooo much)
5. Get rid of "stuff" (attic, closets)
6. be kinder, more patient, & grateful
7. try hiking (be outdoors more)

Hopeful & determined I will be....

[Garden]

You'll get back on track! One day at a time!

[Luca]

Today I weighed in at 159.8.
There is a HUGE difference w. my eating patterns when I go to work vs. when I stay home. Need to get that straight!

[Luca]

160 today.
We are having friends over tonight and may order Chinese food..not sure. But if we go with that, I am going to order straight steamed stuff-sauce on the side. If we do pizza, I will order a salad.
Then, there is the weekend. My plan is to try and mock a work day as much as possible...I also want to get the treadmill up and running (or should I say myself up and running) on Sunday. Getting exercise in is something I want to get back to this year. Walking outside is my favorite but its too cold and dark in the mornings and at night.....so we'll see.

[Luca]

159.6 today.
I've been working hard since the weekend to undo the carb/sugar damage I created. I have also been adding to the Sexy By Summer board...
I have been doing well but I ALWAYS do well during the week. Then the weekend comes and I lose control!? So I will not pat myself on the back until I get at least 2 solid weeks of sticking to plan.
I think when I am home, I become more stressed w. a different kind of stress and less focused....plus I do not pack a lunch and my refrigerator is so much more accessible. Ugh..one of these days I will figure it out! I am hoping by the summer I will do it!

[Luca]

Today I weighed in at 159.6

I had some ice cream w. my kids and dh at friendly's yesterday ...
but today I am seriously focused on NOT letting the whole weekend go bad.

Finishing up my thesis and hoping to get the treadmill back up.

[Luca]

Today I weighed in at 159.4 (not too happy about that)
But I am tryin'...
DH got the flu and things have been typically busy. The good thing is I did finish my thesis for graduate school and I am waiting for a grade. I have one more class and will be done in March. I am very excited to get that done. At work, I have more responsibilities and it is kind of stressful. But I am going to try and budget my time and I NEED to be very organized with everything (but especially time). Hopefully, in the meantime, my goal/s for losing weigth will happen. The winter is still new and I really want to knock off 20 pounds before the spring/summer.

No treadmill up yet either....

[Luca]

I weighed in at 156.6 today-.

Happy about that! But I have been feeling under the weather so I am thinking it is the loss of appetite that is making the numbers go down.
I have not been posting for a few days....kids and dh were sick (now me I guess) work has been busier than ever and I am just plain tired!

I am learning more and more as I get older that you cannot rely on ANYONE for your happiness...it's only you.
Without getting so specific about what I am referring to, all I can say is that I definitely have certain "expectations" for people in my life and when I see that people were not what I thought, I get crushed and let it ruin me...it's awful. But I think I have to come to realize I am in charge of MY happiness...and if I want to reach any goal in life I cannot depend on anyone or let their behavior alter mine. When I do that, I get depressed, angry and then I tend to eat emotionally...all NOT good behaviors. Anyhow, not sure that makes sense to anyone else but me-but this is why I like having a journal.

[Luca]

Weighed in at 157.2 today-but I am really down in the dumps.
DH lost his job-again.....

[Luca]

Weighed in at 156.8.

I am in a better mood today.
I want to start the new month off well-I want to do well making good choices and being in charge of me. I cannot control my surroundings but I CAN control myself-my moods, my choices, my life.

Here's to a good month! Welcome February!

[Luca]

Today I weighed in at 157.
I feel good and I am hoping to get past these dreaded 150's soon. I want to get to the low end or completely out of the 150's by the end of the month. Spring will be here before I know it. I will be getting my masters degree and I have another wedding this summer to go to, so I really want to feel my best.
My goal for this weekend is to get that darn treadmill going. I think that will help me feel less jiggly.
I have been slacking with planning food a bit. I need to get back to making some good low carb meals that I can not only eat for dinner but reheat for my lunches. I have been replacing my cream in my coffee with coconut oil and I do like it~
Hoping to continue to monitor my progress and more importantly to NOT quit no matter how much life can get stressful...

[Luca]

Boy I never realized how badly I can be my own worst enemy!
I weighed in at 161 this morning-mostly water weight I am sure. But I binged this weekend. I was so disappointed that I would not be going to this fancy dinner that I had a new dress and heels for that I wallowed in food-partcularly Pringles and chocolate chip cookies. I am disappointed in myself for sure. It's like I am coming so far-I have been given so many compliments-yet-I am sabotaging myself over a few sad or angry feelings? It doesn't make sense-except it does-there were just so many years of using food as a friend and that is how I have been conditioned to cope with my feelings. No writing in a journal, no go for a brisk walk, no talk to a friend or relative, no take a nice warm bath--GO EAT..alone, in my room, tv on and just forget everything. What a horrible way to live... I've blamed others about that for so long. I know I am passed that part of it-I take full responsibility now for what I have become and my part in changing that but nevertheless, it doesn't always come easy. I wasn't going to post my weight today..I feared I would disappoint "someone" or annoy someone out there in cyber world. But then I realized, yet again, this is a LONG process. I have been doing this LC for almost 2 years now-this summer it will be 2. I have lost almost 50 pounds-not as much others in that time but enough to know that it is much better to feel lighter & wear nice clothes.
Well-I've cooked some stuff for the week-and hoping to walk on that treadmill for 30 minutes tonight and from there-I will keep going-not just to change that number on the scale (although a big motivator) but mainly to get rid of that damn friend named Food that keeps me away from everything and everyone else in the world...

[Luca]

159.6 today-still mad at myself-but ready to start a better week.
Need to keep my emotions about dh losing job and other stuff away from food.
Ugh and the great or not so great thing about these dated journals is there is evidence to the up-down behavior of me! I noticed in the beginning of January I was also progressing around 157 156 and then BOOM another slip-up-Icre cream-something I did not even like caused me to binge. The cycle begins again...the rough days getting back into the groove, seeing progress, then making excuses for bad choices again. I HAVE TO BREAK THE CYCLE!

[Luca]

The last day of February and this morning I weighed in at 155.8. My state of mind is half frustrated and half content. I know the reason I have not lost more weight at this point is all because of me. I know what to do but overeating is still a big part of me. I know much of this is mind over matter and I have not completely fallen off the wagon BUT there still is a "better yet" for me.

My March goal is to continue making good low carb choices and to add exercise into my week.

[Luca]

I weighed in at 155.8 today

[Luca]

Weighed in at 155.8 today.

Hoping to get things done around the house but also get out with the kids and get fresh air. Tomorrow I will be visiting a friend who had a baby (prematurely) but everyone is doing well. I am noticing that after weeks of not "much going on" we will be having many family events going on the next few weeks. I admit, I get a bit anxious about having so much to do but I have to realize I need to keep a good balance. My kids are only children once and I need to be healthy and live in the moment while they are young.

So, as usual, I am hoping to be productive but eat well.

[Luca]

I was just looking over these diary pages. I cannot believe I am still putzing around with the same 5-6 pounds from September! I need to get serious! Spring and summer is around the corner...

[Luca]

Today I weighed in at 154.6.

So far I have not committed to the exercise routine I wanted to pick up again this March. I KNOW this would help my jiggly thighs and my state of mind but I am just soo tired at the end of the day and there is no time in the morning with the kids getting off to school and me getting ready for work. I KNOW it is only an excuse. A half hour of activity IS DOABLE with 24 hours in a day.

Spring starts this week and there are so many family events starting again. My dh is going thru a "clear out stuff in the house" mood. I am all for that as I do not like clutter and "stuff" we do not need laying around. I am glad he is feeling this way because he lost his job...again. This has put me in a bigger funk this time around. It's hard to be in a dismal mood when yiou have 3 young kids. You can't curl up in your bed and just cry...you have to soldier on thru things for their sake. So I am left with trying to make good choices for myself so that I can stay as healthy as I possibly can. My belief is when you are taking care of yourself all the other "things" in life will seem better than if you were unhealthy both mind and body.
Well, I am done with my rant for the day....

[Luca]

I weighed in at 155.6.
I will be going away for a few days this week with my dh and and BIL's, I am excited to get away for a few days because work has been stressing me out.

[Luca]

Today I weighed in at 159. I had a few days away and made some bad choices and drank some wine. I will not dwell on it. I am too busy to think about it. Today, I am getting back on track no matter what. I am feeling anxious as I am hosting Easter and have tons of work responsibilities too. There is always so much to do! But I cannot complain. The hubby and I did get away and had a massage.

[Luca]

Today I weighed in at 157.6.
Glad some of it was water weight but hoping to continue to make good choices.

[Luca]

159.4 today? can't figure it out? peanuts lat last night?

[Luca]

I am feeling way off track lately.
I have a gained only a few pounds but know too well that is a few too many.
I have to get motivated and dedicated again.

The next few weeks I am in charge of something at work that will require me to be ultra focused and organized. If I succeed at this, it will be a big deal for me professionally. I need to stay calm and steadfast as I focus on my health. I think if I do this, stay on track with my food choices, that will transcend into other areas of my life. One area I know needs to change is my energy. I need energy big time. I think the yo-yoing of my eating habits lately have impacted my energy or lack there of. So, one of my goals is to start walking.running again. This was so good to clear my head as well. Praying/spirituality has also been lacking lately. I need to take time to reflect and be thankful. This has always helped me stay focused and in tune to the moment. Here's hoping for a good day.