TexasMommy: Finding My Way

[TexasMommy]

He is a sweetheart Amber... It is still strange to me to be treated like that... I know it is right and how everyone always said I deserved to be treated, but I never got that with my ex. I was only happy if he was happy. He actually said that to me, "if you make me happy, you will be happy in return". WTH.

I'm still sick. I'm worse actually. Last night I had a fever 102.2. My son seems worse too, and he is at the doctor right now with his grandparents. I have this new high deductible health insurance plan, and I don't want to take myself to the doctor. I already have my son's 3 doctor appointments to pay for in full.

Food has been okay but too much of it. If I can stick to LC, I think I will calm down on the overeating soon.

Today:
B- 2 eggs scrambled with cheddar, 2 sausage patties, sf syrup, coffee
L- 1 roasted chicken quarter, salad w ranch
D- brisket, maybe fried eggs, maybe salad (as long as the brisket is done by the time I get home)
I'm also taking dayquil and emergenc stuff that has sugar but oh well, I have to do something to feel better.

[Izzysdream]

Oh Cass I am so happy you found someone nice that treats you with the respect you deserve!!! Love it!!!

[Bejewelme]

Hun I am so sorry you are sick, I had it too I swear by that Zicam when it is first coming on, I have a high deductible plan too I hate it I am switching to Tony's plan now that we are married they just redid their benefits they were so crappy he got stuck owing $17K for his knee surgery now they got a good one.

I am so glad you have a met a nice day that really respects you, just go slow and let it happen, dont rush anything!!! Take the time to get to see all sides of him and let him see all your shades and it will all reveal itself when it is right!

[Izzysdream]

Hope you are feeling better sweetie!

[TexasMommy]

Well, it's time to update this....

Not much is going on right now. I have gotten my eating back on track. I'm on my period as well, so emotionally I'm struggling again. I have been taking Iron supplements at my doc's recomendation and they do seem to be helping me not feel dizzy this time. I'm a little less fatigued as well.

My son is almost completely better after having the flu, croup, and ear infections.

Food today:
b- fried chicken w/ mayo and ketchup
l- leftovers... sauteed zuchinni, alfredo sauce, cream, chicken, and jalapenos.
d- ?

[Bejewelme]

Oh hun that is a shame!!!! Did you ever get that cup thing for your period I keep forgetting to ask you about that? Hope all is well and you are all on the mend now!

[TexasMommy]

OMG the cup... My flow was too heavy for the thing... I used it for three days... and the damn thing fell into the toliet... I actually tried to retrive it, but the toliet gods have it now.

I'm sick AGAIN!! I can't believe this crap. Last night my throat starting hurting pretty bad - woke this morning with a fever and I'm pretty sure I have Strep throat again.

Food:
B- coffee, 2 small grilled chicken breasts, light bbq sauce, provolone cheese
L- nothing
D-?

I was hoping to go to Palo Duro Canyon tomorrow for a picnic with my kids and Tim and his kids. Hopefully I can get to feeling better by tomorrow.

[Izzysdream]

Hopefully you feel better tomorrow so you can go sweetie!

[TexasMommy]

Well, after taking another round of antibiotics I was feeling better this weekend. We went to Palo Duro Canyon Saturday and had a great time eating a picnic lunch and the kids hiked some. It was my first time meeting Tim's children - his DD12 was pretty clingy to him and she made a show of being a "tough girl". I know it's hard for kids when their divorced parents meet other people. I went through it with my daughter, so I can understand somewhat how she feels, and I am able to deal with it. Basically, I was just nice and acted normal. Her and my daughter had a great time with each other... she wanted to spend the night at my house with Caity, so I let her and they had a fun night.

Yesterday evening, Caity and I got out in the front yard to clean up branches, twigs, and leaves. They were everywhere... we have a large willow tree and a row of evergreens in front of the house and the yard looked awful. I have got to spend more time outside taking care of the yards, but I feel like I have to choose between the outside or the inside looking a mess lol.

I really want to look good for Summertime. I bought a pair of size 14 shorts yesterday, and while they fit... my thighs are looking pretty bad. I need to look for a flattering swimsuit for our company work party at the swim pool.

Food Today:
B- coffee, chorizo and egg scramble with cheese
L- sandwich w/ sf whole wheat bread, turkey, provolone, mayo, pickles
S- maybe another sandwhich if I'm hungry
D-??

[Bejewelme]

Hey hun, we started a new badger weigh in why dont you come over and post there with us again?

Oh tell me about daughters and their Dad, I have struggled with Tony's daughter from the get go, she is so clingy and whiny and wants to make sure she takes all his attention the only thing that saved me is that her and my son get along so well. She is a difficult child though. Having kids the same age will help so much! Sounds like you guys are getting sort of serious if you are meeting the kids and stuff! That is excellent!

[Izzysdream]

Hey honey!

[TexasMommy]

Well, things with Tim didn't work out. My daughter was starting to get hopes of having a step-sister and pushing me about him, but he only wants to be friends. So, I had to stop that because I didn't want Caity thinking things and getting her hopes up. I have met someone else (ah the dating life), and he wants what I want, but he is moving quickly...

I have stayed on plan and LC expect for a chocolate on Friday I believe. Easter was nice and the kids had a fun day. I played pool with my best friend and met my new guy friend up there too.

[Bejewelme]

Oh hun well you are young now is your time to make sure you pick the right one, having battled with this myself, I always thought should they meet my son, or wait? I think in the long run it is good to have a minimum of maybe 5 dates before introducing to the kids. Me and Tony dated 3 months before we introduced each other to the kids, I thought he could be the one and I didnt want to mess anything up. I think it is hard on the kids they might start liking someone and then they are gone and its hard to wrap their little heads around that.

[Izzysdream]

Sorry it didn't work out with Tim. Hopefully this new guy works out!!
I'm supposed to go with someone new to the Cardinal Game Opener on Friday. But we haven't even talked on the phone yet. So we'll see....

[TexasMommy]

That's one of the biggest reasons it took me so long to start dating Amber... it is hard, especially since I have the kids almost all of the time. I do want to have a relationship though, so I have to get out there. I took time off for my daughter and she seems to be in a good place now.

I hope so too Denise... let me know how it goes if you do make it to the game. Love you girl.

[TexasMommy]

Work has been so busy, I think I'm losing my mind! We have about 20 maintenance guys from our company here today doing a plant tour, and I have also been buried in paperwork trying to find a variance in our year end financial statement.

I have still been on plan but maybe not eating enough. I haven't had very many veggies the past couple days either. Will be back later to update.

[Izzysdream]

Originally Posted by TexasMommy

Work has been so busy, I think I'm losing my mind! We have about 20 maintenance guys from our company here today doing a plant tour, and I have also been buried in paperwork trying to find a variance in our year end financial statement.

I have still been on plan but maybe not eating enough. I haven't had very many veggies the past couple days either. Will be back later to update.

Hi honey, hope the day gets better and you find the variance for the year's end.

[TexasMommy]

Thanks lady... I do believe I found the variance, but part of it won't make my company happy, but at least I found it.

My lower left back/abdominal hurts for some reason... maybe constipation?? It's very painful whatever it is.

[Izzysdream]

Originally Posted by TexasMommy

Thanks lady... I do believe I found the variance, but part of it won't make my company happy, but at least I found it.

My lower left back/abdominal hurts for some reason... maybe constipation?? It's very painful whatever it is.

Maybe TOM is on the horizon? Mine is due within the week, probably why I'm hungrier....

Almost got to go to the Blues Hockey game tonight, but my ticket was gladly given to a 15 y/o boy whose father died a couple of months ago.
I'll be going with Bob on Saturday. That'll meet my quota for the year. LOL

[Bejewelme]

Texas- its been awhile hun, what's up??

[Izzysdream]

Good to see your not settling sweetie!

[Bejewelme]

Texas- what is up hun, you have been quiet!!! Thinking of you!

[TexasMommy]

I'm still here, but I've been busy with school and finals and my new boyfriend.

I am pretty on track except for a burger and pizza the other day. My weight was 203.5 this morning. I'm still really wanting to pass the 200lb threshold though!!

[Bejewelme]

Yeah for new men and burgers!! LOL
You are so close you will get there soon

[TexasMommy]

199.5 today!!!!

[Izzysdream]

Originally Posted by TexasMommy

199.5 today!!!!

WooHoo!!!

[Jayce]

Way to go! Welcome to Onederland, lady! Now, make room for me there! Lol

[TexasMommy]

Wow, I can't believe I haven't been in my Journal for so long! I still frequent the board... just haven't felt like talking... damn my introverted self lol.

So... after a breakup that left me in the hole financially back in June... I ate my way to 231.5 pounds after getting down to 199 lbs. WTH!!!!

I was binging like mad - just trying to deal with the depression. I had done so well managing my money and finally had all of my personal debt paid off in early 2012, and I went and blew it like an IDIOT on a MAN no less!! I'm digging myself out of that slowly, and I've been eating a clean diet since Oct. 1st.

10 days of clean eating... and I feel so much better about life in general.

I quit smoking on September 24. I'm saving money and am proud of myself.

I started a blog, but changed the settings so that only I can see it LOL. I hate having my life out there so public, but I don't mind posting here as much. Plus, there is so much good support here and kicks in the ass when I need it.

I haven't weighed since I got back on track on October 1. I took some God awful pictures in my underwear, and I am going to track my progress on the first day of each month with pictures and a weigh in.

[Izzysdream]

Cass really good to see you back here! I've missed you! Congrats on quitting smoking, It's been a bit over 2 months for me!
Love ya!

[TexasMommy]

Thanks for the welcome back Denise.

Congrats on 2 months! I knew you had been quit for awhile. I had a bad craving hit yesterday when I was messing around in the breakroom at work... I drink an extra cup of coffee each afternoon instead of smoking lol.

I'm glad it is Friday, but I still have homework to do this weekend. In my Environmental Science lab I have to write a paper on global warming, and I have two tests to take.

I am seeing someone, and I know he doesn't get to spend as much time with me as he would like - but, I refuse to move too quickly with him. I learned my lesson with the last guy I was with. He's nice about it though which I really appreciate. He's nice about everything actually... anytime I have an issue with anything he picks up on it, asks me what's going on, and then takes care of it on his part. My Mom has met him a few times and I think she mostly likes his accent lol. French is his first language but he speaks English well and he is really educated which is important to me. He is in school too, so we both have pretty busy schedules.

Anywho... on to food. I cooked 3 chicken quarters in the slow cooker yesterday and shredded up the chicken and made a casserole with in the included green beans and cream of chicken and mushroom soup. That's what had for breakfast, and it will be lunch too.

I've really had to tighten the belt on food costs. I shopped last week at a Mexican grocery store and got some okay meat deals. I got paid today and need to go shopping again.