Keeping It Lit

[Bejewelme]

Hi T!!! Hope all is well in your world!

[WATCH-ME-SHRINK]

I couldn't post on Thanksgiving without including MUSIC, of course.
I chose this piece for its contemplative effect as I reflect on my blessings. With its ebb and tide of complexity,
this music evokes reverence and joy and peacefulness and thankfulness.
I discovered this artist recently and her music is nothing short of mesmerizing.

The Rose In The Vase On The Table - Karen Marie Garrett -...

Happy Thanksgiving to All...

How Can I Say Thanks

• My family and all that they represent in my life, past and present. I cherish each and every one of them unconditionally.
• Friends – one of the greatest gifts that life has to offer. Friends fill a part of your heart that no one else can.
• The ability to love - Love is a beautiful emotion and something we should be grateful for every single day. Your ability to love is what makes you grow as a person. Love can teach us deep lessons we would never learn any other way. It can teach us about ourselves and about others. It is an amazing feeling, and it is unmatched through anything else. It can lead to pain, or heartache, but it is worth every second to have experienced it at all. Love freely and deeply, for being able to love is what makes life worth living.
• The ability to learn - Your ability to learn –Knowledge is a never-ending quest, and is a key player is a happy and fulfilled life. Never take the ability to learn for granted, considering that some people struggle with even the simplest things. Relish in the knowledge of others and teach yourself as much as you can. You can never know too much, the more you open your mind to learn, the greater an experience life will become.
• Our body – The human body is an amazing and interesting thing. It moves us, heals us, takes us places we want to go. Be grateful for your body and treat it with the respect it deserves. Fuel it with proper nutrition and care for it accordingly. Be gentle with it, and challenge it. Use it to the best of your ability, and most of all enjoy it no matter its shape or size. It is a great gift.
• Children – They teach us so much about living. You need only watch a child’s free-spirit for a moment to see the pure joy they hold inside. Children living in the moment, without much regard for what has happened in the past. They love openly, without restriction, and they take pleasure in every thing they do. If you have children of your own, enjoy them every chance you get because they grow for too quickly and before you know it that time is gone. If you do not have children find ways to enjoy others, or embrace the values that they live by and find a way to incorporate them into your life. You will be amazed by how much you can learn from a child if you are willing.
• Good health
• My home
• Faith in God
• Freedom
• My job
• Disappointments - So that I can learn what matters most and enjoy success that much more.
• Happiness – The state of mind – not people, places or things. Happiness is a choice.
• Joy - Joy is deeper than happiness. At it's foundation, it is the security that Christ holds fast and gives peace, hope and
comfort--even in the midst of hardship. Joy is rooted in the certainty that Jesus is our Lord and Savior, and He is in control, no matter what we endure. Joy comes from being connected to him. It comes from a deep trust, an inner "knowing" that He is in control and that he is good. No matter what.
• Mistakes - Without our mistakes we would learn no lessons,
• Kindness of strangers - The kindness of strangers can be a magical thing. Look around you and observe all the wonderful things that people do for each other every day. These kind acts may not always be easy to spot, but they are there, and they are making a difference. When it happens to you, you will know it, and when you do it for someone else it may change their life. Always be aware of those around you, and be thankful for their kindness even when you can’t see it with your eyes.
• Challenges - A good challenge makes us strong, teaches us about ourselves, and pushes us to our limits. Challenge is what makes us grow and what moves us forward in life. Be thankful for the challenges you face because they make life more interesting, and they push you in the direction you need to go.
• Our pets - Animals provide us with unconditional love, trust and companionship. Wild animals not only give us food, but also teach us about life and they cycle it takes. They show us strength, and give us all we need to survive.
• Music – Music soothes the soul and is an extraordinary pleasure. It can enhance a mood, or change an emotion. It invokes memories, and creates new ones. It is a gift I am thankful for regularly.
• Laughter – It truly is the best medicine, and something that should be exercised often. Be thankful you have reasons to laugh, people to laugh with, and the ability to do it at all.
• Food –As you sit down for your next meal be thankful for every bite, and remember that there are so many people who have nothing at all to eat.
• Dreams and goals - Dreams and goals drive us, and knowing they are a possibility is a true bonus. Dream big, set high standards and work to achieve all of your goals. They only thing that is stopping us from accomplishing anything is ourselves.
• Talents – They are God-given. They are not products of our own doing. Give God the glory for your talents, whatever they are, utilize them, and be thankful for them.
• Strengths – to use in order to help ourselves and others
• Weaknesses – Because no one can be good at everything, and because they challenge us to work harder, or urge us to ask others for help. They can lift us higher if used in the right way.
• God’s creation and the world around me – One look around hastens immediate praise and adoration of our Creator. The earth and its raw beauty is an amazing thing, nature offering healing powers like no other.
• Parents – Parents are cherished because without them I would not exist. Parents give love and nurture throughout our lives unconditionally and teach us life lessons of enduring legacies, leaving meaningful and lasting impact on our lives.
• Second chances – the Gift of forgiveness.
• Sunrises and sunsets - The beauty of the sun, the warmth it brings, and the beginnings and the ends that it represents.
• The small things in life – Flowers, fall leaves, the first snow, giggles, friends, warmth of a fire on a cool evening, hugs, recalling fond memories.

[Bejewelme]

WOW T what a beautiful post!!!! I hope you had a great holiday I know you always love this time of year, need to print that when I need a reminder of what all I am grateful for!!!

[WATCH-ME-SHRINK]

YouTube

It’s been about a month since I posted in this journal. Figured it was time for an update.

My passion for fitness lives on as I try to eat clean throughout the week, allowing myself a cheat day/meal on weekends, usually Fridays, since that is when I like to enjoy a glass or two of wine. I would rather sacrifice carbs for wine, frankly. Hmmm. Yep. Let’s just be frank!

My sons are all home for Christmas under one roof, and it’s been nice watching them interact with each other as they’ve grown and matured. I’ve been going to the gym on average three days a week, and almost always my youngest son goes along with me. He tries to go four days a week, in addition to his training/conditioning with his trainer on Sunday evenings. He’s grown into quite the athlete, and is already 5’9 – leaving me the shortest in the family. Imagine THAT. He is thrilled that he’s gained some weight, now at 165. I just commented to him this morning as he was eating breakfast before school that I noticed a big difference in the size of his back. He’s always had really muscular legs, and his efforts are paying off there as well. (We fight over who gets to use the shake blender first when we get home from the gym.) Now that Gavin is home from college (middle son), we all three are spending time at the gym. My gym owners bought a new facility, and it’s now at least three times the size it was before, maybe larger. More weights, more weight machines, more cardio areas, a track, a special area designated for youth/athletes for their plyo conditioning, etc. A huge area for Zumba and aerobics. A spinning class. A movie/cardio room, complete with huge screens to watch movies while you do cardio, painted black, a cool “theater” feel to it. A kitchen/snack bar area. A nursery. The list goes on. It’s AWESOME. If there is any spare time left in my day, I would rather be spending it there than anywhere else I can think of. I’m absolutely certain that I could exist quite happily without a TV in my house. It pretty much serves no purpose, esp since I can get weather and news on my cell phone any time of the day or night.

(Loving my new iphone by the way)

I’ll be taking Friday off this week to finish up some errands and Christmas prep. I have not done any baking or cooking, and I doubt I’ll be doing as much as I have in years past, esp since at least three of us in the family are trying to eat healthy and work out, etc. We’ve agreed that we’ll indulge on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, and then we’ll be back to VLC and busting butt for the week following, until we splurge again on New Year’s. Gavin has actually asked me to make several LC recipes for Christmas dinner. Sounds like a plan to me. Most of them came from LCF Recipe Room. I may have to visit there again and add to my menu options. Just this week we feasted on Nacho Soup. YUM.

I stopped by Drug Emporium yesterday on my way home from work to pick up an item, and while there visited their wine aisle – THRILLED to discover that their Ergo Rioja, my favorite, was on sale for $11.90 a bottle through Dec 29! Suh-weet. It’s $15 per bottle at my local grocery store. And if you buy 6, you get an additional 10% discount. Oh, yeah, no problem. Oh, and why not throw in a new Pinot Noir to try while I’m at it. And a lovely pine garland I’d had my eye on for weeks, with tiny little pinecones and varying shades of pine that makes it look so authentic – yep, on sale too. Half price! And a yummy bag of Kahlua coffee… wow. So glad I made THAT stop! Christmas came early for T!

People at the gym ask me all the time if I’m gonna compete again. (Even people who don’t know me will approach me and ask: Do you compete? Are you going to compete?”) I thought I had retired. So, yes, it’s a major tease when they bring it up. Competing is hard work, but it’s also VERY EXPENSIVE. Right now, I don’t see it fitting into my budget. And time is NOT on my side. So realistically, I can’t see myself competing again. But I would LOVE to do a prep along with other younger members who are thinking of competing. I’m not ruling that out. It will give me something to focus on during the cold, dreary winter months when depression has a way of setting in. I find that when I’m sad, when I’m longing, empty, remembering, and tend to fall into a funk, spending time at the gym inevitably serves to lift me out of that darkness and rekindles a flame of positive energy within me. Being around like-minded people, friends, it’s such fabulous therapy. They are like family to me.

"I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas...."
But it doesn't look promising for our neck of the woods. Oh, well...

Christmas is my favorite time of the year. It can be a sad time when we’ve experienced loss in one form or another, but I believe that if we focus on the Love of the Christ Child and his Gift to us of Eternity, it takes the spotlight off ourselves and our problems and reignites the flame of the Christmas Spirit. As I’ve mentioned before:
Joy is deeper than happiness. At its foundation, it is the security that Christ holds fast and gives peace, hope and
comfort--even in the midst of hardship. Joy is rooted in the certainty that Jesus is our Lord and Savior, and He is in control, no matter what we endure. Joy comes from being connected to him. It comes from a deep trust, an inner "knowing" that He is in control and that he is good. No matter what.

Merry Christmas to all. May all your homes be blessed by the love that was born on that night so long ago…

(My latest art project for our lawn)

[Bejewelme]

Merry Christmas friend!! It was nice to hear an update from you!!! Sounds like the boys are doing great!! Enjoy this time with them! Have a Merry Christmas!!!
Hugs
Amber

[WATCH-ME-SHRINK]

[GardenGirl639]

Great reminder!

[WATCH-ME-SHRINK]

It has come full circle.
It's what occupies much of my time lately.
A privilege.
An honor.
Rekindling life energy...
indomitable spirit...
happiness...

This is what it's all about.

[WATCH-ME-SHRINK]

Originally Posted by GardenGirl639

Great reminder!

Send me the link to your "fresh" journal!

[GardenGirl639]

Originally Posted by WATCH-ME-SHRINK

Send me the link to your "fresh" journal!

My "Fresh" journal is a physical journal that I write in with a turquoise pen. I'm posting notes from it in my GardenGirl639 Journal here on LCF.

GardenGirl639

[GardenGirl639]

Originally Posted by WATCH-ME-SHRINK

It has come full circle.
It's what occupies much of my time lately.
A privilege.
An honor.
Rekindling life energy...
indomitable spirit...
happiness...

This is what it's all about.

You have always been a huge encouragement to me!!!!

Thank you.

[WATCH-ME-SHRINK]

... to what's important to you.

[Bejewelme]

Hi T!!! Good to see you!!!

[GardenGirl639]

Originally Posted by Bejewelme

Hi T!!! Good to see you!!!

[WATCH-ME-SHRINK]

Hey, Amber and Elizabeth.

Burrrrrrr! It is freezing out there...bundle up, my friends. Stay warm ... and STAY ACTIVE!

Dusting things off in my journal now and then.

Staying as committed as always. Winter is a little tough on us, as we all know, and that is my biggest hurdle, fighting the winter blah-blues, the urge to soothe my woes with carbage. We all know that doesn't work. It's only a temporary lift to the mood, that ends in an even deeper nose dive hours/days/weeks later.

Staying distracted, staying inspired, staying active -- that's my arsenal for kicking all of that.

Since the New Year, I've switched my exercise up a bit. I take spinning two nights per week (butt-kicker! but euphoric), I lift weights 2-3 x per week, I try to get in 30 mins of morning cardio four days per week, and I throw in one morning of my endearing Callanetics to keep my body nice and long and limber and lifted. Can't beat Callanetics for that.

My biggest hurdle these days it trying to convince my husband that he isn't special, he's no exception, his body is aging just like the rest of us, and if he doesn't get off his ass and start being proactive about it, he's going to pay for it in the not too distant future, and certainly in years to come. His fitness level is the worst it's ever been, he's gotten very careless about his diet, and he is getting pretty much zero exercise. He can't wear lots of clothes in his closet, rotating the few things that do fit, and thinks nothing of that. A bigger and bigger waist size? No problem to him. My youngest son and I both are members of our gym, and we are passionate about it, love going, and our bodies are proof of it. He and I both have tried every approach to convince him to join us, dancing around the dreaded "N" word (NAG) as much as possible, trying to be positive with our remarks and encouragement, but it falls on deafened ears. He won't give us any reasons for his disinterest in cleaning up his act and/or working out. It mostly boils down to him basically saying, "...but I don't WANT to..." or "...it's just not my thing..." or "...I will eventually, just not now..." (that one's been overused going on about 15 years now???).

I'm beyond frustrated. The phrase that runs through my head over and over: Quid pro quo. I take care of myself for him (and for me, of course, but he benefits, no?), is it not fair that he should want to take care of himself for me?

It's getting to the point of causing a lot of strife in our marriage. I'll leave it at that.

He's the best father a child could ever hope for. The.Best. He is a good husband, staying on top of paying attention to our expenses, repairs, financial planning issues. I guess that should be enough. Maybe others see this as shallow, my wanting him to take care of his health, fitness and his body. I would disagree. When I'm in my seventies and I'm running around , burning up the road, hiking, being active, going here and there and in this and that, where is he going to be? Will have health issues? Will he feel like doing those things with me?

Everything he wants me to do with him, I try. I am as open-minded as I can be in embracing his interests. He agrees with that. So why can't he try to do the same for me?

I'm out of solutions. And I'm really sad about it.

I don't like it to bring me down and affect my mood, esp at this time of year, so I dig into my "arsenal" I spoke of and just keep peddling. It's all I can do.

So. There. My dirty laundry is spilled. It is what it is.

I don't usually purge personal crap, but it feels good to get it out.

I'm meeting my friend Danielle at the gym at 10 to work butt/hamstrings/legs today. We're spinning partners too. Love her.

Guess it's time to get ready. I plan to make the most of this day.

Life goes on.

[GardenGirl639]

[RENEWED]

Twyla,

I don't think its shallow at all! You want one of the most important people in your life to grow old with you! Not just that, but to grow old with you as healthy as he can be. Awwww, I feel your frustration and pray that he gets a little 'spark' of your fire and get in the best shape of his life!

[WATCH-ME-SHRINK]

Originally Posted by RENEWED

Twyla,

I don't think its shallow at all! You want one of the most important people in your life to grow old with you! Not just that, but to grow old with you as healthy as he can be. Awwww, I feel your frustration and pray that he gets a little 'spark' of your fire and get in the best shape of his life!

Thank you so much, Renewed.

Sometimes when our frustrations hit the wall, we just need to know it's okay. We need validated somehow, if that makes sense.

That meant the world to me.

Blessings to you.

[Bejewelme]

T-
It is not shallow to want your husband to be healthy and there for you as you age!!! The problem is no one can want it for him, he has to want it for himself! Oh how I know this from 42 years of living in denial!!!! It was what prompted me 2 years ago to get my act together before I embarked on another marriage with Tony. He was 7 years older than me and fit and healthy and I was waddling along. People probably thought I was stealing his food, LOL

My advice it to maybe not nag per se, but like I know you eat healthy so when you make dinner it is what it is, dont have snacks around, maybe plan some active dates to get him moving, like pick a spot and go for a walk with the lure of being together. Make him a nice shake for breakfast, sort of throw some healthy changes his way and see if he adapts????

It is a tough spot, but boy as the years are ticking, it is becoming more apparent about prolonging an active lifestyle, I dont want to be 70 and hunched over unable to walk, it is hard to watch loved ones on a downward spiral, but we all know you have to want it for yourself! Maybe a really good private heart to heart, like it is not about his looks or any of that, but growing old together and being there to become grandparents one day and watching the boys grow etc. That you want him along for the ride?

I feel for you T, I know how it is!!!

But it was good to hear from you, I miss you!!! I love spin class too!!!!

[WATCH-ME-SHRINK]

Originally Posted by Bejewelme

T-
It is not shallow to want your husband to be healthy and there for you as you age!!! The problem is no one can want it for him, he has to want it for himself! Oh how I know this from 42 years of living in denial!!!! It was what prompted me 2 years ago to get my act together before I embarked on another marriage with Tony. He was 7 years older than me and fit and healthy and I was waddling along. People probably thought I was stealing his food, LOL

My advice it to maybe not nag per se, but like I know you eat healthy so when you make dinner it is what it is, dont have snacks around, maybe plan some active dates to get him moving, like pick a spot and go for a walk with the lure of being together. Make him a nice shake for breakfast, sort of throw some healthy changes his way and see if he adapts????

It is a tough spot, but boy as the years are ticking, it is becoming more apparent about prolonging an active lifestyle, I dont want to be 70 and hunched over unable to walk, it is hard to watch loved ones on a downward spiral, but we all know you have to want it for yourself! Maybe a really good private heart to heart, like it is not about his looks or any of that, but growing old together and being there to become grandparents one day and watching the boys grow etc. That you want him along for the ride?

I feel for you T, I know how it is!!!

But it was good to hear from you, I miss you!!! I love spin class too!!!!

Thanks for those words of encouragement, Amber. Good advice, most all have been tried.

I'm not giving up hope. We all know that once someone makes the effort to exercise, for it to become a habit, not a chore, it has to be done -- what, 21 times/days, something like that? It's getting him to hang in there once he makes an effort, instead of taking the easy way out (the back door) and just letting it become less and less of a priority. Getting there is just plain and simple discipline. You either have it or you don't.

So. Should I hold my breath? Not hold my breath?

I'm waiting to exhale.

In the meantime, yes, spinning. Love.It. The music and energy of that class is what makes it -- just makes me come alive, totally "plugged in." Does it take the place of weight lifting for my "fix"? Nevah! But I do love the other kind of high that I get from this intense form of cardio.

Plus, I love mixing up my routine anyway.

It's good to see you. I peeked in your journal, and I see you're working hard at the gym and have a new trainer -- I like that relentless spirit about you. I dig it! You go, girl. Keep up the great work.

[Bejewelme]

I am doing a 5K mud run for cancer, so now I have to run again, ughgh I am not a fan of running but hoping that will help me get ready lifting is still by far my favorite! I do miss my trainer though, this one is working on the running but she is still not like my first gal, but talk about a habit, 2 faithful years of working out, I joined that gym at 290 pounds and everyone thought I wouldn't last a week!!! The one thing I wont give up is the working out! The new trainer gave me like the Presidential fit test I was in the top 10% for 44 year old women, that totally made me stokked, I battle that darn scale but ultimately I want to be fit! So that is what I focus on! Eating right 90% of the time, living life and making sure I exercise 5 days a week!

Hugs to you T, I hope you can get hubby on board, I see this alot at some of my bootcamp classes with husbands and wives, like one is hardcore and the other is sort of dragged there and not into it. Maybe your husband is a little jealous of your success, and feels like he can never live up to the level of perfection that you achieved? So it is not worth trying? You know the male ego is a strange thing. Like the one couple, he lost 125 pounds, she has lost nothing in 8 months of going to bootcamp, etc, and she is at least 100 pounds overweight, and she said one time, I will never be able to do what Mike did, and I said WTH not??? He is a great support and you can do it too, and heck if I can you can, so maybe that is in your hubby's head? I think just reassuring him that you want him healthy, is the only thing you can do at this point, and hope he catches the drift.

My favorite cartoon is a man with a belly at the doctors and the doctor says, "What fits your busy schedule better, exercising one hour a day, or being dead 24 hours a day?

I have that written and posted everywhere, it is a constant reminder of why I climb out of bed at 5:00 am to go to the gym!

[h82bl8]

Twyla - We are in the same boat with our hubbies. My dh is on meds for hb pressure, high cholesteral and diabetes. I asked him to take a walk with me arounda nearby school and he stated that he would go, but only take the short route. All he wants to do when he gets home from work is sit, watch TV and eat. We are no longer intimate, and while I understand I've put on some weight, I am trying to do something about it. My concern is that he will have some type of stroke or heart attack and I will have to quit my job to take care of him, something that I can't afford to do. As soon as I say I'm going to start low carb here he comes with lots of chips, fried foods and candie.

[WATCH-ME-SHRINK]

Okay. I'm done.

Done with WINTER, that is. So very done. It has not been an easy winter for me, and I fear there's a pattern starting here for the years to come. That is, until I can manage to move a bit farther south.

And to think that I used to be a snowbird of sorts.

Frankly, WE haven't had much snow at all this year, but the cold weather, the rain, stuck inside, dry skin (ugh), dark/long days, having to bundle up in layers before going for a morning run -- oh, and don't forget tissues -- omg. Enuf!

Sunday was glorious.

I want more of those days!

It's become more and more difficult getting/staying motivated to eat on plan, make GOOD choices when eating. It really IS about what we put in our mouth, NOT about how many hours we THINK we can spend trying to work it off. That just AIN'T gonna happen. Dream on.

So. Being a big believer in visualization...

Learning to Exhale: This Picture Is Worth a Thousand Words

... I'm gonna take a pic of my motivational board and post copies around in obvious places -- my car, my bathroom mirror, my desk at work -- as a constant reminder that time does not stand still, and if I plan to be "beach ready" by June, excuses are out the window. Now or never.

It's up to me. No one else. Nothing else.

It's time to roll.

“Every person who wins in any undertaking
must be willing to cut all sources of retreat.
Only by doing so
can one be sure of maintaining that state of mind known as
a burning desire to win,
essential to success.”

- Napoleon Hill

[WATCH-ME-SHRINK]

Originally Posted by Bejewelme

I am doing a 5K mud run for cancer, so now I have to run again, ughgh I am not a fan of running but hoping that will help me get ready lifting is still by far my favorite!

.....I have that written and posted everywhere, it is a constant reminder of why I climb out of bed at 5:00 am to go to the gym!

Go, Amber!

Hope the running is going well.

And yes, post those "reminders."

We all need a whole lot more IN YOUR FACE reality checks.

[WATCH-ME-SHRINK]

I Run Because


Learning to Exhale: I Run Because

[WATCH-ME-SHRINK]

It's official!

I got an email notification this morning...