Blonde with a Rose Meets JUDDD

[Princessdmw33]

Originally Posted by Blonde with a Rose

Up day today. Yay!

I need to say how amazing and special it is to have such help and encouragement here. I do not ever take it for granted and I'm humbled by the responses I get, the fellowship, advice, pats on the back and occasional (needed) kicks to the pants. I feel so lucky to have made such wonderful online friends, so fortunate to be able to open up and be honest with them and myself, to face this thing head on with my eyes open instead of retreating into a bag of chips. Thank you.

Dawn~ it must be torture to lose so slowly, and you have a year on me. I'll try to be more patient and remember the benefits are more than just weight loss. You keep reminding me to not wimp out after a couple of weeks! Thanks.

Laura, I'm glad you looked us up at New Year, New You. A great group! I hope you'll stay in touch with me. I get the stuck at home thing. I try to stay as busy as possible on DD's and away from home or out in my garden, if I can. Reading is good too, but TV makes me want to eat! Stay warm and off the ice.

It's been very warm in the afternoons but mornings are cold enough to need a fire in the wood stove. There is a hard frost on the rooftops this morning and I won't want to garden until after lunchtime. I'm off work today and I plan on doing a little painting. I bought some terra cotta pots at the dollar store for...$1 each. They are about 2 1/2 quarts in size and new so I just have to seal them then paint away. Not sure what yet...bright or cottagey? I dunno, I'll have to check my paint supplies.

[Blonde with a Rose]

Boy oh boy, I am not having a good DD...first of all it's going to be a medium day and If I can't get control, it's going to be an UD, and maybe even an over the top day. I'm not sure what the problem is, I am trying not to binge, it's not something that I do...but I seem to be emotional and feel not in control. I can't remember the last time I felt this way, I can't think of anything that is causing it, it's just weird. This is the first time (oh please let it be the last) that I blew a DD. I know that it's no big deal, just call it an UD and DD tomorrow. Lots of JUDDD'ers have two UD's in a row, it's not the end of the world, or the end of anything, really. I have to strive for perfection but perfection is not attainable. Okay, I can feel me talking me down off the ledge...whew.

[Blonde with a Rose]

Originally Posted by ellgee

Okay, I really feel you need to post some pictures of your garden! My husband and I love to work in the yard and yesterday I was looking over things (from the window) and am worried about what the snow/ice this year has done to our plants. Cannot wait for the weather to warm up so we can dig in the dirt!

I managed my DD very well yesterday and have a glorious UD today. Do you count anything on your UDs? I am counting calories and trying to keep them around 1700. When I have done JUDDD before, crazy UDs on my part have kept the weight loss low and I end up quitting. It may just be a fact of my life that I have to count what goes in my piehole!

Laura

Laura I think I have a pathological aversion to counting calories. Since I've been trying to count them on UD's it seems as if I'm obsessed with food and what I can eat or not. When I started this WOE, UD's were for whatever I wanted, unconditionally and I really did well and stayed in control and satisfied. Today is a reaction, I think of all the calorie counting yesterday and the worry over it and the obsession about it. I'm think I need to go back to the beginning and do this the way I started it.

It's a struggle not to beat myself up over this slip, not get into the all or nothing mode which has always been my downfall. This is not a diet it's a way of life for me and I need to stay focused because I'm definitely motivated!!

[ellgee]

EXACTLY! That is why I had to walk away from Weight Watchers. I get so focused on this food and that food and the points or the calories and exercise. It's sick! I work for four doctors and we have lunches all the time. I HATE saying, "Oh too many points. Can't have that." So I rebel in much the same way. Gain a lot. Feel like crap. I worry that by counting on my UDs I am going to set myself up. But I also worry that if I let myself go on UDs I won't lose. I also worry about my kids. I worry about global warming. I worry about there being no social security when I retire....ROFL!!!!

Don't beat yourself up. Just love yourself into starting anew the way that worked for you. Read your sig line. PERFECTION IS IMPOSSIBLE. HOWEVER, STRIVING FOR PERFECTION IS NOT. DO THE BEST YOU CAN UNDER THE CONDITIONS THAT EXIST. THAT IS WHAT COUNTS.

Hugs!

Laura

[Blonde with a Rose]

Originally Posted by ellgee

EXACTLY! That is why I had to walk away from Weight Watchers. I get so focused on this food and that food and the points or the calories and exercise. It's sick! I work for four doctors and we have lunches all the time. I HATE saying, "Oh too many points. Can't have that." So I rebel in much the same way. Gain a lot. Feel like crap. I worry that by counting on my UDs I am going to set myself up. But I also worry that if I let myself go on UDs I won't lose. I also worry about my kids. I worry about global warming. I worry about there being no social security when I retire....ROFL!!!!

Don't beat yourself up. Just love yourself into starting anew the way that worked for you. Read your sig line. PERFECTION IS IMPOSSIBLE. HOWEVER, STRIVING FOR PERFECTION IS NOT. DO THE BEST YOU CAN UNDER THE CONDITIONS THAT EXIST. THAT IS WHAT COUNTS.

Hugs!

Laura

Thanks Laura, I laughed pretty hard at your "worries"....

Yeah, perfection is impossible. I'm really good a getting my head straight, it just takes awhile. At least this time (as opposed to straight low carb) I won't gain back the 17lbs and then start over again. I'll be back on track tomorrow (well today, really) forgive and forget and move forward, right? Glad you're here.

[MagieDen]

This losing weight stuff is TOUGH! I am learning to take it one day at a time, one meal at a time and 1 pound at a time.

I think we are just sometimes too hard on ourselves, just my opinion. Blonde I think we all will have days where it just isn't clicking and we need to get over the day and go on to the next and work it better than the day before.

I have been looking at weight loss more from the perspective of health and making some better choices of what I am putting in this poor run down body. I have abused my body and now I am paying for it and it wants and needs me to be better to it than I have been.

I have been saying a mantra that goes like this. "For today I WILL......... and then fullfilling that.

I know that as long as you stick to what you are doing and changing the things that you don't like in what you are doing, you will be healthier.

Keep it up!

[Blonde with a Rose]

Starting my day right with a 1/3 cup of southwestern eggbeaters and a little salsa on top. The plan is to stay busy as possible, maybe have eggbeaters again at lunchtime and then my "go-to" salad for dinner. Tea, water, diet soda and any thing else that keeps me hydrated and semi-full. I hate the way I felt yesterday (like a bad girl) and I don't want to repeat that feeling.

Today is yard day...it's going to be 80 degrees (don't be hatin") and I'm down for some dirt and pots.

[JK130]

17 pounds. 17 pounds! 17 pounds!!!

and on to 18....you ARE doing it lady! it is very hard...and YOU are doing it. well done

have fun in your garden

[Blonde with a Rose]

Originally Posted by MagieDen

This losing weight stuff is TOUGH! I am learning to take it one day at a time, one meal at a time and 1 pound at a time.

I think we are just sometimes too hard on ourselves, just my opinion. Blonde I think we all will have days where it just isn't clicking and we need to get over the day and go on to the next and work it better than the day before.

I have been looking at weight loss more from the perspective of health and making some better choices of what I am putting in this poor run down body. I have abused my body and now I am paying for it and it wants and needs me to be better to it than I have been.

I have been saying a mantra that goes like this. "For today I WILL......... and then fullfilling that.

I know that as long as you stick to what you are doing and changing the things that you don't like in what you are doing, you will be healthier.

Keep it up!

Maggie, thanks, I agree with everything you said. Choices. Aren't we the lucky ones, to be able to make choices? To decide for ourselves healthy or not? I plan to stick with this, I DO feel better and maybe I'm weighing in too much. I'm cheering for you too!

Jan~ It is hard and I need to acknowledge it. If it were easy, everyone would do it. How's the maintenance going?

I made it through my DD yesterday, determined to get past my little mistake. And I do remember falling off low carb and basically regaining all the weight (usually 10lbs) before I got control of myself! Then starting all over. In that respect, this feels like a hiccup. I tried some french onion soup (30 calories) with some cut up shiritaki noodles (40 cals) at lunchtime and that helped me get past the really hungry feelings I was having. My stomach growled pretty much all day but I did it.

My little experiment with calorie counting on UD's was a bust. I want to be able to eat without stressing. Maybe I need to re-read Geneen Roth again.

Thanks GF's for hanging with me and giving such awesome advice and encouragement! It is SOOO appreciated!

[Blonde with a Rose]

Just a quick post. Today is my DD. Supposed to be yesterday, but I got to tearing up my house, moving furniture, sweeping mopping, an dusting and trashing stuff and so I was starving by lunchtime and did two up days in a row. I got sooo much done (DH was out of town for school for two days) and I'm getting ready to go to work at my paying job today. I don't know where all that energy came from but by 6:00 yesterday PM I was dying, everything hurt and I curled up with the dogs and watched TV til I nodded off, then went to bed with the lights and TV on....

[ellgee]

Hey girlie!

How are things going? Sounds like you were quite the whirlwind yesterday!

I am having a tough time with my UDs. Tried counting calories - made me crazy. Tried not counting calories - went crazy anyway. I'm not sure what my major malfunction is but I imagine I have more than one!

Have a great day!

Laura

[Princessdmw33]

Originally Posted by Blonde with a Rose

Just a quick post. Today is my DD. Supposed to be yesterday, but I got to tearing up my house, moving furniture, sweeping mopping, an dusting and trashing stuff and so I was starving by lunchtime and did two up days in a row. I got sooo much done (DH was out of town for school for two days) and I'm getting ready to go to work at my paying job today. I don't know where all that energy came from but by 6:00 yesterday PM I was dying, everything hurt and I curled up with the dogs and watched TV til I nodded off, then went to bed with the lights and TV on....

Sounds like a good day.

[JK130]

it sounds like you're done with the cleaning genie...please send him my way next. he's desperately needed

[Blonde with a Rose]

Morning Girlies!

Laura~ I don't know what to say about the UD's. I have some of the same issues. I know the best thing to do is plan it, just like down day. Breakfast lunch and dinner and snacks. Know what it will be before hand. I also have better luck when I plan a BIG salad somewhere in there. Try not to worry too much about, that's when I get into trouble, when I make it an issue. I am staying off the scale for awhile, it was setting me back and making me feel bad when I didn't lose every week, and I'm in this for the long haul. Hang in there Laura, keep with the DD's and the rest will come.

Hi Dawn, how ya doin"? I still have so much work to do around here but it was a good day for cleaning and AM-Vets came and picked up a lot of items, including clothing that is too big and things I haven't worn in a couple of years that hang in my closet "just in case". Feels good to clear out some clutter! How is DH's ankle? Is he still on crutches?

Jan~ fortunately the Cleaning Genie is able to be many places at once so I'll send him over and keep him as well....is that like having your cake and eating it too? Mmmmm...caaake. (Homer Simpson). How goes the maintenance?

[JK130]

happy new week to you!!

[Blonde with a Rose]

Originally Posted by jkaay

happy new week to you!!

Thank you Jan! Right back at ya! You still workin' your "maintenance magic"?

I had an amazing DD yesterday! Eggbeaters and salsa for breakfast than off to work to serve pasta to the Presidents Day escapees! Long shift, good money and then came home to my sick hubby (head cold)...made a BAS (big a$$ salad) with chicken, watched the tube, went to bed and now I'm tryingto be low carb today on my UD. I would like to start feeling more in control on these days and I think getting back to low carb will help alot. I'm still off the scale for now, I don't need any discouragement and apparently I can make my own encouragement without the help of the scale. I'm completely out of Julian Bakery LC bread so I need to make a trip to the ONE place I can get it here without mail order. The bread has 1 net carb!!! This mornings breakfast was Southwestern eggbeaters and turkey sausage w/ salsa. Yum. I'm completely addicted to salsa. I believe that going back to strict low carb will help me get that mean old scale movin on down.

Work again today, DH is sleeping (finally) and hopefully on the mend.

[Princessdmw33]

It is funny I have been eating eggs lately with salsa on it too. I think it has been all of your mentioning of salsa that did me in.

[Blonde with a Rose]

Originally Posted by Princessdmw33

It is funny I have been eating eggs lately with salsa on it too. I think it has been all of your mentioning of salsa that did me in.

Dawn ~ I am officially a salsa addict and eat it every day! It's veggies, right?

Today is day three of returning to lowcarb UD's with JUDDD. I'm hoping to jumpstart my weight loss again. Yesterday was tough going, I worked and was mentally challenged. It's the lowcarb mental fog that comes in the very beginning...but, I had a successful DD and went to bed early, frankly I was wiped out but I slept very well. This my first day off this week so I'm finally going to pick up some Julian Bakery LC bread. Yum!

Also~ I mailed ordered some Miracle Noodles (0 calorie) and some glucomannan powder. Apparently the powder is a zero calorie thickener with no taste and all fiber. Lots of the girls on the JUDDD use it for making puddings and sauces, it's supposed to be very filling and seems to help them alot on the DD's. One of the ladies makes pudding with almond milk and flavored zero calorie drink powders. Another makes a "chinese style" sauce for stir fry. I can't wait to get mine!!

I'm going to make the thin crust (egg and mozzarella) pizza today with a little turkey pepperoni, olives, mushrooms and onion. Good stuff!

Dawn, if you stop by...have you heard from Stacy?

I'm still not weighing, just following JUDDD every day.

[Princessdmw33]

Originally Posted by Blonde with a Rose

Dawn ~ I am officially a salsa addict and eat it every day! It's veggies, right?

Today is day three of returning to lowcarb UD's with JUDDD. I'm hoping to jumpstart my weight loss again. Yesterday was tough going, I worked and was mentally challenged. It's the lowcarb mental fog that comes in the very beginning...but, I had a successful DD and went to bed early, frankly I was wiped out but I slept very well. This my first day off this week so I'm finally going to pick up some Julian Bakery LC bread. Yum!

Also~ I mailed ordered some Miracle Noodles (0 calorie) and some glucomannan powder. Apparently the powder is a zero calorie thickener with no taste and all fiber. Lots of the girls on the JUDDD use it for making puddings and sauces, it's supposed to be very filling and seems to help them alot on the DD's. One of the ladies makes pudding with almond milk and flavored zero calorie drink powders. Another makes a "chinese style" sauce for stir fry. I can't wait to get mine!!

I'm going to make the thin crust (egg and mozzarella) pizza today with a little turkey pepperoni, olives, mushrooms and onion. Good stuff!

Dawn, if you stop by...have you heard from Stacy?

I'm still not weighing, just following JUDDD every day.

A good way not to get that mental fog with low carbing is just to make sure that you have enough fat in your diet. Hot chocolate made with almond milk is really good too and enough to keep you hunger free for a while.

I text her the other day and just told her I was thinking of her. I won't speak for her but I am guessing she is struggling right now and send her every once in a while. I will tell her you are asking. She will appreciate it.

[Blonde with a Rose]

Dawn, last night I had swiss miss 25 cal hot choc, made with almond milk. It was yummy and filling.

Made it through my UD, stayed low carb and am not as hungry this morning as I usually am. I have a lunch ate with my best gf today, need to find a place with a good salad!!!

[Princessdmw33]

Woohoo!!!!!!!

I need to find a place with a good salad too. I had one the other day but the dressing that my DH brought home was raspberry vingerette. I don't know what he was thinking. I'm not so much concerned with the sugar that was in it but the whole taste! Ick!!! I asked him for balsamic vingerette and ended up just making my own.

[Blonde with a Rose]

Originally Posted by Princessdmw33

Woohoo!!!!!!!

I need to find a place with a good salad too. I had one the other day but the dressing that my DH brought home was raspberry vingerette. I don't know what he was thinking. I'm not so much concerned with the sugar that was in it but the whole taste! Ick!!! I asked him for balsamic vingerette and ended up just making my own.

My DD salads are pretty much the same everytime. A giant pile of romaine, drizzled with Walden Farms bacon and ranch or caesar dressing (0 cals), then drizzled with Taco bell hot sauce (lol), then topped with Herdez salsa and then baked chicken breast (cubed). I can't tell you why this is sooo good, but it just is good. When I'm out I use Balsamic vinegrette and tabasco sauce. Apparently my mouth doesn't miss the fat in the dressing if it has some heat to eat. On my UD I will sometimes have blue cheese dressing but I've gotten used to the fat free salads and I think it's best if I stay with it. I don't like sweet vinagrettes either.

Things are really winding down in the other thread, do you think it's because we took the challenge part out of it? I love the support so much, I don't think I would still be hanging in if I didn't have that. I feel so close to you and Stacy, Maggie, Jan, Christine. I really miss Danielle. I've made some other friends on the JUDDD thread, but they're still new, know what I mean?

[Princessdmw33]

Things are winding down but I don't think that it was because we took the challenge out of it. I think when you put challenge in it people can become intimidated and back away. I would have backed away because my weight loss is slower than molasses and if it would have become one of those competition things I couldn't have done it. I do believe that it is possible that it is still viewed as a challenge though. The other thing is that when people are ashamed because they may have fallen they shy away instead of just seeking the emotional support to know that they "aren't bad".

I don't know if that made any sense or not.

[MagieDen]

Originally Posted by Blonde with a Rose

My DD salads are pretty much the same everytime. A giant pile of romaine, drizzled with Walden Farms bacon and ranch or caesar dressing (0 cals), then drizzled with Taco bell hot sauce (lol), then topped with Herdez salsa and then baked chicken breast (cubed). I can't tell you why this is sooo good, but it just is good. When I'm out I use Balsamic vinegrette and tabasco sauce. Apparently my mouth doesn't miss the fat in the dressing if it has some heat to eat. On my UD I will sometimes have blue cheese dressing but I've gotten used to the fat free salads and I think it's best if I stay with it. I don't like sweet vinagrettes either.

Things are really winding down in the other thread, do you think it's because we took the challenge part out of it? I love the support so much, I don't think I would still be hanging in if I didn't have that. I feel so close to you and Stacy, Maggie, Jan, Christine. I really miss Danielle. I've made some other friends on the JUDDD thread, but they're still new, know what I mean?

Danielle is still working this weight loss thing, just finding out what can work for her. We all have a road to travel on and it can get bumpy and hard. I having the support but sometimes I am not as chatty as others or charting as others or coundting carbs, calories etc...... I pull away when that goes on but I stay on working on myself. I enjoy reading what others are doing and try to take some suggestions and such.

I have seen where some have put themselves out there only to be told something is wrong with the way they lose or chose to lose. I miss Stacy as well but also know that there are so many challenges for her to overcome and she came pull back some but come back later, I just wait. Blonde I am so glad that you have found something that is working for you and I like your honesty about this losing weight stuff. Dawn is the bomb too! She hangs in there everyday and keeps on keepin' on. I told someone as long as we don't give on ourselves that we are ALL winners.

I know where I can find you and you can find me also on my journal and counting it down until I reach under 200 lbs, which by the way I WILL DO THIS YEAR!!!!!!! I don't alwasy post but that is where you can find me.

Have a wonderful day, and NEVER give up!

[Blonde with a Rose]

Dawn and Maggie! You are both right. Dawn I wouldn't want to be competing to lose weight, it's hard enough competing with myself. I also think people drop out or pull back because they are struggling. I know for myself personally it's so hard to respond to everyone and then I feel guilty for leaving someone out...also, when things get extremely personal...I find myself at a loss for words. Maggie, I'm a dunce! I didn't know you have a journal?! How can I find you? You will do it this year!!I'd love to support you as well. As for people feeling "bad" about falling away or not losing...isn't it awful the way we treat ourselves sometimes? I have made food my enemy for so long and just lately have come to see it as sustenance and a tool for good health. I've used it as my "drug of choice" for years and like any other abused drug it has taken it's toll on me, my health, my body, my self esteem.

I'm lucky to have such wonderful support. I know you have busy lives and I want you to know I do appreciate you.

[MagieDen]

Originally Posted by Blonde with a Rose

Dawn and Maggie! You are both right. Dawn I wouldn't want to be competing to lose weight, it's hard enough competing with myself. I also think people drop out or pull back because they are struggling. I know for myself personally it's so hard to respond to everyone and then I feel guilty for leaving someone out...also, when things get extremely personal...I find myself at a loss for words. Maggie, I'm a dunce! I didn't know you have a journal?! How can I find you? You will do it this year!!I'd love to support you as well. As for people feeling "bad" about falling away or not losing...isn't it awful the way we treat ourselves sometimes? I have made food my enemy for so long and just lately have come to see it as sustenance and a tool for good health. I've used it as my "drug of choice" for years and like any other abused drug it has taken it's toll on me, my health, my body, my self esteem.

I'm lucky to have such wonderful support. I know you have busy lives and I want you to know I do appreciate you.

It is awful the way we treat ourselves and others for that matter. We are only human and have to work on ourselves daily, more for some than others.(me ) I will be 50 next year and I am determined NOT to go into that age over 200 lbs. I will continue to work on myself daily and myself along the way. As far as food being your enenmy I can relate to all you said. Working on having a better relationship with it as well. MY journal is entitled to ONEDERland & Beyond I have been posting there off and on. I usually post when I am in the mood(boy I can be moody). I will blame it on my fluctuating hormones. Anyhoo, appreciate you and your support as well! Have a wonderful day!

[DesertGurl]

Hello ladies..dropping by for a chat.

Blonde, you're doing so well!!! It sounds like you are really getting a handle on this JUDDD thing to make it work for you, that's awesome. I just couldn't do it. Mentally I dunno if I'm there yet to have those UD's be available to me. LOL

Personally, I've never felt unable to come and post on the thread. For me it's been about actually sitting long enough to do so because of all the crappola going on in my life. However, I believe I have reached a point where I have finally decided that I need to do this for myself, I WANT to do this for myself and that is IS okay for me to be selfish right now. I have given SO much of myself this year in more ways than I even care to write. I am starting at a very very low point in my life, but determined to not stay here. I can see where I want to be and how I want to succeed, the challenge is just finding the energy to slog through all the muck to get there.

Good to see you girls, I'll be back to check in.

♥danielle

[Princessdmw33]

Originally Posted by MagieDen

Danielle is still working this weight loss thing, just finding out what can work for her. We all have a road to travel on and it can get bumpy and hard. I having the support but sometimes I am not as chatty as others or charting as others or coundting carbs, calories etc...... I pull away when that goes on but I stay on working on myself. I enjoy reading what others are doing and try to take some suggestions and such.

I have seen where some have put themselves out there only to be told something is wrong with the way they lose or chose to lose. I miss Stacy as well but also know that there are so many challenges for her to overcome and she came pull back some but come back later, I just wait. Blonde I am so glad that you have found something that is working for you and I like your honesty about this losing weight stuff. Dawn is the bomb too! She hangs in there everyday and keeps on keepin' on. I told someone as long as we don't give on ourselves that we are ALL winners.

I know where I can find you and you can find me also on my journal and counting it down until I reach under 200 lbs, which by the way I WILL DO THIS YEAR!!!!!!! I don't alwasy post but that is where you can find me.

Have a wonderful day, and NEVER give up!

Originally Posted by Blonde with a Rose

Dawn and Maggie! You are both right. Dawn I wouldn't want to be competing to lose weight, it's hard enough competing with myself. I also think people drop out or pull back because they are struggling. I know for myself personally it's so hard to respond to everyone and then I feel guilty for leaving someone out...also, when things get extremely personal...I find myself at a loss for words. Maggie, I'm a dunce! I didn't know you have a journal?! How can I find you? You will do it this year!!I'd love to support you as well. As for people feeling "bad" about falling away or not losing...isn't it awful the way we treat ourselves sometimes? I have made food my enemy for so long and just lately have come to see it as sustenance and a tool for good health. I've used it as my "drug of choice" for years and like any other abused drug it has taken it's toll on me, my health, my body, my self esteem.

I'm lucky to have such wonderful support. I know you have busy lives and I want you to know I do appreciate you.

Originally Posted by DesertGurl

Hello ladies..dropping by for a chat.

Blonde, you're doing so well!!! It sounds like you are really getting a handle on this JUDDD thing to make it work for you, that's awesome. I just couldn't do it. Mentally I dunno if I'm there yet to have those UD's be available to me. LOL

Personally, I've never felt unable to come and post on the thread. For me it's been about actually sitting long enough to do so because of all the crappola going on in my life. However, I believe I have reached a point where I have finally decided that I need to do this for myself, I WANT to do this for myself and that is IS okay for me to be selfish right now. I have given SO much of myself this year in more ways than I even care to write. I am starting at a very very low point in my life, but determined to not stay here. I can see where I want to be and how I want to succeed, the challenge is just finding the energy to slog through all the muck to get there.

Good to see you girls, I'll be back to check in.

♥danielle

This is to all of you but was inspired by Maggie!!



I love ya all. Danielle - we are here if you need us. We are all a private message away too.

[Blonde with a Rose]

This is the best part. Connecting, supporting, encouraging. Ditto what Dawn said. Right back at ya!!

[DesertGurl]

Dawn, you're such a sweetie. thank you.

Blonde, how's it going staying off the scale? I dunno if I could do it!