Blonde with a Rose Meets JUDDD

[Blonde with a Rose]

Sending out a big hug to my girlfriends here!

Everything is status quo~ Still countin" calories. Good thing I can count pretty high.

I'm trying to talk DH into NOT going to work tomorrow, He's staying busy here but can stop and rest or nap when needed...at work he's just too gunho!

We have s-l-o-w-l-y repainted one "now spare" bedroom, just need to pull the carpet and lay down some sort of floor. (DS is helping). We're actually thinking about concrete paint/stain and a big floor rug. It will be the new hobby room, a place to work on fun stuff that doesn't include eating (or smoking). I can set up my sewing machine, my watercolors and my beads (which are so messy I've never messes with them). I'm excited. DS is getting rich,

[JK130]

"~ Still countin" calories. Good thing I can count pretty high." LOLOLOLOLOLOL!!! I totally GET you Blonde!

"It will be the new hobby room, a place to work on fun stuff that doesn't include eating (or smoking)."
I am at a loss in imagining a space/place that is fun and doesn't involve food. And yeah, I KNOW what that says!

Hey Christine

It's a new week coming up, ladies...any fun plans for the holiday?

[ellgee]

Hi Blonde!

You know what - I can count high too! LOL! You are doing great!

How exciting to change out a room! I'd love a hobby room. DD hasn't gotten all her stuff out of her room yet so we are her storage facility. DS still lives with us as he will be in college for the next three years. And my other bedroom where my father in law resided was going to be my exercise room until DH couldn't get my huge treadmill down the hall! So back into the office it went.

I need to do something with that room. DH's dad will NOT be living with us when my husband's out of town work stint finishes. We hope to get him a small apartment nearby. I decided I don't look good in jailhouse orange. LOL!

[Blonde with a Rose]

Hi Jan and Laura! It's getting so hard to sit down and write. DH is home and the little girls are here every morning during the week, then to the boys and girls club at noon.

Jan, the room is coming along, painted, old carpet out and we're going to put down a new product that is a three step concrete stain made by BEHR brand. The result is called Tuscan Stone. DH says piece of cake, I say "I don't know...." I'm glad you appreciate my humor. How are YOU?

Laura, DD moved out last year (again) and is married now but she was 26 when she moved out. DS moved out last year as well at 26. Eldest DH came back home for nine months so, I really have not experienced true empty nest (but I'm willing to try) Tell your DH to take that treadmill apart and move it on in to your new gym.

One thing I've learned from counting calories is that it's never as bad as I thought. I just have to be accountable and suffer the consequences. As I suspected it's much easier without cabinets full of cookies and gold fish and such. The little girls are disappointed with my selection but have come to like a fried egg and toast when they get here in the mornings. That's a victory in itself.

[DesertGurl]

Hello beautiful lady!

I'm sorry to hear about DH! Hope he's feelin better now.
Wowzers, you've been a busy bee and it sounds absolutely lovely!! Glad to hear that the calorie counting is going well for you honey! Proud of all you're accomplishing!

[JK130]

Happy 4th ladies! I am soooo lazy this morning. I've got a bike ride and bbq planned for later, and should be cleaning my house, washing the car and mowing the yard now. I'm watching "Heavy" instead, when I should be up and moving. What's happening in your day? Anything red, white and blue?

[Blonde with a Rose]

Ughhhhh! Nothing fabulous to report. DH is still suffering, the weather has turned H-O-T, and I'm hanging in there. Still calorie counting. Posted no loss/no gain on Friday...hopefully this Friday will yield some positive results. I am still calorie counting on the high end, but I don't feel like I'm on a "diet" so that helps. JUDDD taught me patience so as long as I'm trying to curtail my monster appetite I'm heading in the right direction, right? Right? On the bright side I worked a 4 1/2 hour shift yesterday so I got lots of exercise!

I have the girls this morning, inside because it's so hot outside, even the dogs don't want to be outside. I'm kinda wishing I had to go to work.

Hope you all are doing well, thank you for checking in on me.

[MagieDen]

Blonde!

[Blonde with a Rose]

MAGGIE!!!!!
How goes the war, Dollface?

[Blonde with a Rose]

I am struggling again, but not beating on myself too much. This too shall pass.

[DesertGurl]

Hang in there! You know what to do.

[ChristineCQ]

It will, Blonde, as always you will rise above. Here to listen if you need us!!!

[Blonde with a Rose]

Doing a fly-by! Happy Monday!

DH went back to work today, feeling better and hopefully all over it. Still has some pain in the areas where the rash broke out. He is way less crabby and more like his old self. Yay!

I haven't smoked since Thursday, Double Yay! I'm using nicotine patches to control withdrawal symptoms and "lighting up" is getting farther from my mind. Not as far as I'd like but far enough for now. This has been a huge struggle up to this point. Weirdly, I woke myself up "whistling" (wheezing) on Friday morning and something clicked in my head. "That's it, I've had it" is what I thought, jumped in the shower, washed away any residue of smoke and slapped a patch on my arm. I was strangely "manic" the first day, and highly motivated. Yesterday I was a little depressed but worked through it and stayed clean. I've been cleaning my house like a whirlwind (no we never smoke inside) and I realized how little I've done in the past few months. I moved furniture around, cleared out clutter, and started organizing....all in the name of not thinking about having a cigarette. I truly feel I've kicked it this time. I need to remind myself in the future how easily it can creep back in.

Food....well, not so hot. Not out of control, just not paying much attention. Next step...JUDDD. I need a little more time to adapt first.

Thank you, as always for checking on me, caring and being so supportive.

[ChristineCQ]

Good for you, Blonde! Whether it's smoking or eating or drinking or whatever, that "click" is what it takes!! We're here for ya!

[DesertGurl]

Glad dh is feeling better! I bet you were glad to have him scoot off to work, huh?

You've been a busy bee. Moving in the right direction, and it appears everything is starting to align the way it's supposed to. Proud of you as always. Love you lady!

[Blonde with a Rose]

Hi ladies! Today is day six of NO smoke. Going through a little depression over not having a quick fix to anxiety but I'm still motivated and feeling stronger every day. My mantra? "Don't look back, don't look back......."

[ChristineCQ]

Boston - Don't Look Back (Studio Version) - YouTube

[MagieDen]

Hang in there Blonde!

[Blonde with a Rose]

LOL, Christine! Mags, I'm hangin in there. I've come too far to go back now.

[Blonde with a Rose]

Thursday, July 26th 2012~

While kicking my cigarette habit, my food habit has reared it's ugly, obese head and I'm feeling like I did before I started JUDDD. I went back to the very beginning, and re-read my own words about it. Was that positive, excited person really me? Did I really find the will to starve every other day? I did. Can I get back there?

I can. If I can stop smoking, I can do JUDDD. I need to remember that the first day is the most difficult but I can make it. To remember the feeling of peace and lightness that came with being in control of myself and my eating. I need to remember how wonderful it felt NOT to be food obsessed. I didn't smoke when I started JUDDD. I fought through the hunger and the naysayers without a single crutch. It's time to regain my freedom from crutches. To once again feel hopeful and happy, in control.

I'm starting fresh, tomorrow will be my first DD in a long time. I'm ready to rock it! My plan? B: 2 boiled eggs D: Chicken Breast and Romaine Salad, Walden Farms, and Salsa! Water, tea, tea, tea. Onederland, you are my target and I've got you in my sights!

[MagieDen]

You Can Do It Blonde!!! You are doing it! Will be here cheering you on to ONEderland!!!!

You've got this!

[Blonde with a Rose]

Yay Maggie! WooHoo!! Thank you! Love your new journal!

Just got back from the market with eggs, romaine, chicken, cabbage (oops, sorry Maggie) tea, FF Cottage cheese, Walden Farms dressing, broccoli slaw, mushrooms etc. Getting all geared up for tomorrow!

[DesertGurl]

Yes, that was really YOU. And yes, you CAN get back there again. I KNOW YOU CAN!

You are prepared and ready, now all you do is DO IT.

Proud of you for finding your way back. That is the hardest part about losing weight, the mental anguish,road blocks, ideas, etc that we put ourselves through. The most important thing is, YOU'RE BACK!

[Blonde with a Rose]

That is the hardest part about losing weight, the mental anguish,road blocks, ideas, etc that we put ourselves through.


Amen to that Danielle!

The idea is not to be our own worst enemy....

[DesertGurl]

I am my own worst critic in the very hardest, worst case scenario. I'm ashamed about it, that I can't see myself as being worthy of success and good health. I'm thankful that I have my husband, my kids, and this website, it keeps me going. If I wasn't here I don't know that I'd be all that productive in getting my life together, so I have to really credit all the wonderful people I've met here, many life long friendships that have been made. And my husband, well, he's been amazing.

[Blonde with a Rose]

I completely get where you are right now. I had some very loving friends here tell me to lighten up on myself, I'm doing the same for you. You deserve to be healthy and happy, and you're already wonderful. If you need answers, then go and seek them. You have every right to know what's happening with your body, your blood...all of that. I believe in you, you're working so hard and you will be rewarded. Keep the faith, sista.

[MagieDen]

We ALL deserve to be healthy and happy!!!! Group hug!!!

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{ Danielle, Christine, Jan, Blonde, Me , Dawn(I know she's lurking! , LCF's not mentioned! }}}}}}}}}

Let's Do this THANG!!!!!

[Blonde with a Rose]

Okay, here we go...
DD 1

I didn't have coffee this morning. I want it my way and I can't use my calories on creamer so I had Iced Tea instead. I woke up really thirsty anyway and it was good and refreshing. I haven't eaten yet, I boiled a couple of eggs and started reading the Alternate Calorie Diet which I downloaded last night onto my NookBook. I know how this works but it's good to have back up info as to why it's such a good plan. It is a good plan.

Granddaughters are watching Megamind on demand. Their mother was very upset this morning upon discovering someone's cell phone in GD1's backpack, and was clearly frazzled when she dropped them off. I asked DD1 if she wanted to talk to me about something and she said not right now. I'm not sure how to handle this one, so I'll drop the phone at the boys and girls club and figure out what to say. Anyone have any ideas? GD1 has no backpack today. Ya think?

Day 8, no cigs. I've got this one. Lunch today with my bestie, I've got this one as well. Salad, chicken yada yada. She emailed me this morning and asked if I had a vegan cookbook she could borrow. Well of course I do, I've done it all, including straight up, no cheat, fat free vegan for two solid years about a decade or so ago. Sounds like she's on a mission, too.

One other little niggling glitch in this JUDDD thing...my biggest supporter, my DD2 is not on board with this, this time. I'm not sure why, but I think it may have something to do her with reading Bethenny Frankel's book, Skinny Girl. I've read the book, it's a good one but it's more for...Skinny girls. Not for someone with a lot of weight to lose. I'm not too worried, the proof is in the pudding but I'll be sure not to complain about being hungry to my baby girl.

One of the things she said is that she worried about me jumping all over the place with different plans...lowcarb, calorie counting and now this again. I asked if she thought I should just give up? I can't give up. I need to succeed, not just for my health but my self esteem. It's hard to keep failing and failing and falling down and not ever getting anywhere.

I have got this.

[DesertGurl]

You DO have this!

Hmmm, phone in the backpack... I'd just take it back and tell'em the truth, no one knows how or why this was in her bag... IMO there shouldn't be too much issue...a million reasons how that got in there are possible. Is that all DD was worried about or do you think it was something else?

Oh my! Vegan for 2 straight years... Mission or no mission I think I might die without my meat.

Day 8 no cigs, lunch with the bestie....totally yours for the taking my friend!

Bummer that your DD won't be joining you on this, but hopefully she will understand that it's important that you keep trying and making every effort to keep yourself healthy and happy. I know she's worried about you and only wants you happy, she'll soon see that this *does* make you happy.

Here ya go honey, moving forward! You got this!

[Blonde with a Rose]

Hey Maggie, hey Dani~

Made it!

I'm not worried that DD2 won't join me, she thinks this whole UP/Down diet is a bad idea. I'll just have to change her mind by setting a good example. DD2 is svelte, tall, and gorgeous...exercises like a demon. Her weakness is gummy bears and red twizzlers. Can you imagine?

I had a good day yesterday, and it actually wasn't as bad as my very first DD. Mind set, I guess. Onward I go.....