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Old 06-01-2012, 11:49 AM   #841
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Ah, another pet lover! They give so much back. Thanks again Maggie, I'm feeling better. I made myself a big romaine salad for lunch (no breakfast) with crumbled burger, cheddar and blue cheese dressing. Yum. I guess I was hungry. We have a few yellow squash in the garden the size of my pinky finger...soon we'll be having egg frittata with sauteed squash.

My plan of action today...

Pick up some l/c bread.
Get a new e-cigarrette (old one is broken) to use with my no-nicotine cartridges.
Use the nicorette gum I bought last time I quit.
drink lots of water
Crest White Strips (my reward for not smoking)
Get in some exercise

Buy:
several bags of romaine and spinach
assorted l/c veggies
more protein
l/c shakes
frozen berries

I've come to the conclusion that my funk has mostly been the complete disappointment in myself for smoking again after 4 months of being clean, and the prospect of quitting (yet again), my poor eating habits that stemmed from my emotional upheaval over the cigarettes. I don't know why it's important for me to understand my behavior, but it is. I need to be able to correct it and to do this I must understand it. What I'll never understand is why I keep doing these self-destructive things....

Well, I'm off to make my changes.....
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Old 06-01-2012, 01:13 PM   #842
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It seems we are hardest on ourselves when nobody else is being hard on us. Blonde yourself where you are right now and just keep on keepin' on or as my son says "Let It Be". He loves the Beatles and has this tattooed on his arm and always says this to me. Don't be so hard on yourself you'll make me cry
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Old 06-01-2012, 01:19 PM   #843
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I know how you feel, Blonde. Maggie's advice is wonderful; we are always so hard on ourselves. But you have done the best thing possible, which is to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and make plans for tomorrow. Hang in there, friend.
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Old 06-02-2012, 03:38 PM   #844
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Hi my friends~ Eating l/c and still working on the cigarette problem. I feel somewhat better with my food under control. Thank you for all the kind words, it's a lucky thing to have such good friends here. Enjoy your weekend!
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Old 06-04-2012, 05:13 PM   #845
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Glad you're feeling better about things, Blonde!
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Old 06-04-2012, 06:49 PM   #846
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Hi there honey! Hugging you from afar. I'm so proud of you for all the change you are making in your life. I know the smoking has upset you but you have a plan and you are taking the steps to put that plan into action. What more can anyone ask of themselves? I have a friend at work who says, "All you can do is all you can do." I used to hate it but it has become my life motto! LOL!

And I'm happy you are doing the LCing. Your salad actually made me hungry!! I've gone of the rails as far as JUDDD. I've attempted to get some semblance of control and today was a start. I've decided to just count straight calories until I'm ready to JUDDD again. Really wanted to LC a bit but I'm worried that will set me up for a binge on Fruity Pebbles or something! LOL!
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Old 06-08-2012, 08:21 AM   #847
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Oh Girls! Thanks Christine, every day is a challenge. Today is NOT smoking, round 2 (or maybe round bazillion). I have a nic patch on, got up at 5 and just stuck it on my arm! I have no smokes in the house so if I think I have to smoke, I have to rip the patch off and go to the store....I'm cautiously optimistic.

Laura, I am going with straight calorie counting, too! Fine minds think alike sometimes. I kept having " l/c Fail" and I figured at this rate I'm going to gain weight because I eat the meat and the cheese and fat etc, then I fall off and eat the bad stuff. So in reality I'm just eating way too may calories and high carb to boot. One of the great things I've learned form JUDDD is that calories DEFINITELY count. Between the smoking and the constant failure to comply with anything I have been beating myself up on a regular basis. Today I will count my calories and not smoke. I wish I knew that last line was an absolute truth, but again, there are no absolutes. Can I just say, that I really want a cigarette right now? Given a few minutes the craving will pass.

I had lunch with my BFF yesterday. We only get to see each other a couple of times a month. She knew I was a little "off" and asked me what was going on...so I looked her straight in the eye and said "I'm smoking again". Her reply? "I love you". Man that just hit me in the heart and I started leaking all over the place. It's pretty much what you girls have been telling me. She wanted to know why I being so hard on myself, and told me that I'm still me, just trying to kick a bad bad habit.

...and, the craving has passed. For now.
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Old 06-08-2012, 09:06 AM   #848
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Old 06-08-2012, 09:54 AM   #849
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Originally Posted by Blonde with a Rose View Post
I had lunch with my BFF yesterday. We only get to see each other a couple of times a month. She knew I was a little "off" and asked me what was going on...so I looked her straight in the eye and said "I'm smoking again". Her reply? "I love you". Man that just hit me in the heart and I started leaking all over the place. It's pretty much what you girls have been telling me. She wanted to know why I being so hard on myself, and told me that I'm still me, just trying to kick a bad bad habit.

...and, the craving has passed. For now.


I'm so glad you were able to see your BFF and that she gave you the perfect response. You ARE still you, and you ARE trying to kick the bad habit. It's the habit that's bad, not you.

You can do it, Blonde. You really can.
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Old 06-08-2012, 11:41 AM   #850
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Oh Blonde, my goes out to you on wanting to stop the smoking. My DS who is 20 started smoking when he turnned 18 and I pray everyday that he can stop. He tells me he desires too but doesn't try to use some of the methods that are out there to stop. It is hard enough to work on food issues so maybe doing one thing at a time may help. I know Amber has stopped but it has taken her awhile to be in the right frame of mind to accomplish it. I really don't know what to say but that I support you and hope you can keep working on it for your health. Have a good weekend and be good to yourself.

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Old 06-08-2012, 02:21 PM   #851
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Hello Sweetie Pie

Hang in there and be kind to yourself. You CAN get it done and conquer it, I know you can. Sounds like you have a really great friend who loves you no matter what, just like us. Be good to you and know you are worth all the hard work. ♥♥
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Old 06-10-2012, 10:14 AM   #852
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Hey Blonde, how are you?
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Old 06-10-2012, 10:28 AM   #853
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Checkin on you! ♥♥
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Old 06-10-2012, 10:32 AM   #854
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Hey friend! You okay? Hope all is well.

I'm still floundering around not doing particularly well on anything I try. And boy does the scale love that. Ugh!

Check in with us!
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Old 06-11-2012, 08:39 AM   #855
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Hello my sweet and caring friends. Danielle, Maggie and Christine thank you for the kind words. I'm doing better, still have the habit and I think I better lay off talking about that one, it makes me feel like the worst flake ever.

Food wise I've been calorie counting since last Friday and I'm doing pretty well with that one. It's keeping me accountable and reminds me of the good results I had when I calorie counted on JUDDD. I'm going to weigh in on Friday and see how it's going.

DD and DSIL found a 3 bedroom condo and they're moving next weekend (15th)! I'll have the girls a lot during the summer but the whole thing will have a different feel, you know? It's been 9 months and in retrospect it went really fast. They wanted to rent a house but the cost was out of sight in San Diego County. The new place though has NEW everything inside from floors to counter and cabinets and appliances, and laundry hook-ups. DD is really excited about that!

Laura hang in there girl, we can do this!
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Old 06-11-2012, 08:44 AM   #856
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Happy Monday Blonde, glad to hear things are well with you.
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Old 06-11-2012, 08:46 AM   #857
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Yes but Maggie I just backed out of Exercise tag.....I'm overwhelmed right now. I hope I can come back when my had is better?
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Old 06-11-2012, 02:13 PM   #858
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Yes but Maggie I just backed out of Exercise tag.....I'm overwhelmed right now. I hope I can come back when my had is better?
No problem Blonde I am not playing anymore. I just wanted to have some fun and I did, I am not sure if anyone is still playing because I don't check the thread. I get enough exercise in for myself so it was really for others that maybe didn't do any and just to have some fun. You do what you want, it is all good. I am getting back to the gym tomorrow to do some laps or maybe do a Water Aerobics class. I need to get going with this and will do hopefully 2 days a week, I get soo tired of talking about my weight and exercising takes my mind off the number on the scale and just lets me BE! It relieves stress for me, try it!


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Old 06-12-2012, 11:03 AM   #859
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Hey girl,

Be sweet to yourself. You are doing fine. Lots of changes coming up and it is never easy. Congrats on the calorie counting! That, my friend, is a victory! Claim it!

Hugs to you!

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Old 06-12-2012, 05:39 PM   #860
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Condo sounds great! Going to be a big adjustment, but you'll manage just fine, amazing woman that you are!!
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Old 06-13-2012, 05:18 AM   #861
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Happy Hump Day Blonde!!!! Be good to yourself and enjoy your day!
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Old 06-13-2012, 08:19 AM   #862
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Mornin" Ladies!

I'm still calorie counting and doing well with that. It's amazing how much you can eat if you get more than 500 a day! Right, Laura? Right, Maggie? Christine, I think you all are amazing!!!!

I've been super busy this week, up with the Four Oclocks (flowers) today to get DH out the door. I'm also scheduled for more shifts this week and I've been dragging my butt home every day. I'm afraid that by Friday I'll be crawling home (if my knees weren't so bad). It's good to be busy though, not much time to brood. I did manage to get a nice long walk in after work yesterday, yay me!

Our veggie garden is coming along nicely. The tomatoes are just starting to make tiny green, shooter marble sized fruits but the yellow crookneck squash is producing already, zukes not far behind. The Japanese cucumbers just went in last weekend so it'll be awhile before we get any of those. I planted marigolds and salvia in the garden for prettiness but I told DH he needed them to discourage bugs.

I'm off to visit some journals (yours) and see how you're doing. Thank you all again for the wonderful support!

and

~Blonde
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Old 06-13-2012, 10:21 AM   #863
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Oh heck yeah on those calories! 500 is really kind of hard and it seems like feasting when you have a regular amount of calories to eat. How many are you doing per day?

Your garden sounds amazing! I only have some potted plants - cherry tomatoes and jalapenos. My tomatoes have been producing like crazy and they are soooo sweet! My jalapenos have just started to flower.

You sure are working hard, my love!
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Old 06-13-2012, 02:58 PM   #864
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Glad to hear about your garden! My cuke plants have flowers....yay! I've been eating lettuce from the garden, too. Delicious!
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Old 06-14-2012, 12:17 PM   #865
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Nice garden! I have the blackest thumb known to mankind and am not allowed to have plants or anything else

Hope all is well!
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Old 06-14-2012, 12:37 PM   #866
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Hi girls! Home today with a sick granddaughter.

Laura I'm counting 1000-1300 calories, depending on how hungry I am. Yes indeed a feast compared to 500. So far so good, I'm not feeling defeated yet, we'll see what happens when I get on the scale in the morning. I want to weigh on Friday to help keep myself honest, but you know how much I like the scale.... I love fresh peppers! Ours are Anaheim chilies and bell. I love roasted jalapenos (had a mistype in penos and almost peed my pants).

Christine I've never tried to grow lettuce, I'm afraid the bugs will eat them all. I'll bet it's nice to pick and eat super fresh lettuce! What kind of cukes did you plant?

Danielle, there's no such thing as a black thumb! Plants can die for anyone, sometimes from too much attention (water or fertilizer). I know you could have houseplants if you wanted to have some. So no black thumb for you. Anyone who can raise such great kids like you did, can have plants. Silly. Start with a cactus....

Other than being unexpectedly home today, I'm doing well. I feel in control again (except for the dreaded tobacco problem). I'm gearing up to quit. Today was the day but I had no nic patches here so later when I can leave the house...no excuses, just sayin'. If I get the little ones chest cold I'm gonna be hurtin' for sure.

I'll check in tomorrow with after I weigh in, good or bad, I'm accountable.
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Old 06-14-2012, 12:39 PM   #867
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Hope DGD is feeling better!!! I am growing something called salt and pepper cukes. I've never heard of them, but DS thought they'd be good.

Glad to hear you are feeling in control, and I hope you avoid that chest cold! Yuck.
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Old 06-14-2012, 01:07 PM   #868
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Hope DGD is feeling better!!! I am growing something called salt and pepper cukes. I've never heard of them, but DS thought they'd be good.

Glad to hear you are feeling in control, and I hope you avoid that chest cold! Yuck.
Well if I don't ~ it'll be my own dang fault.
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Old 06-14-2012, 01:45 PM   #869
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No, I can't grow a thing I have tried houseplants so many times it's embarrassing. I dunno what the heck they do they just don't love me back. lol I do much better with humans apparently

Hope DGD feels better soon Glad that you're feeling better and in control. One day at a time is all anybody can do!
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Old 06-14-2012, 02:04 PM   #870
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Sounds like you are in a good place Blonde!
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