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Old 02-26-2012, 04:00 PM   #1201
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Originally Posted by monet0329 View Post
sounds like a good day!!.. not me

a friend came over.. we went to walmart.. had subway...flat bread bacon ranch footlong...Im a hog.. then.. got Kaydens hair cut and took them to DQ...hd a reese blizzard.. medium.... now I have a shepards pie in the oven.. gonna have a salad with that... tomorrow is a new day...

be strong lady bug!
It's a slippery slope! Once I've messed up, then I figure I've already ruined the day so why even try?

I'm trying to make sure I have meals ready or easy to fix while we're having to help with MIL. I don't wanna be stuck over there and not have stuff to eat and then get so hungry that I don't care what I eat. Like Friday... ugh!
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Old 02-28-2012, 07:32 AM   #1202
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Old 02-28-2012, 09:13 PM   #1203
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how ya doin!?
Blew it today. Pretty stressful.... was with MIL since a few minutes after 6 this morning. Did I ever mention that I'm not a morning person?

MIL is "actively dying." At 8 this morning we all thought she was just about through. But she's still going, although struggling and crying out. Makes us all sad to see.

Most of the time we just watch her or talk to her, but when we do have physical duties with her it takes three or four of us and then we're all exhausted. And she cries out when we move her. I know God's timing will be perfect...

I figured that eating with the family and eating what our church is sending would be easier since I don't have time to run home and cook. But I feel sick after eating wheat products AND sweets that I knew better than to eat. So I hope I can figure out something better tomorrow.
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Old 02-29-2012, 01:13 AM   #1204
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Sorry..

For your MIL, your husband and you.
Know it's hard. Hope you all will have
peace soon.

Glad you had a few days vacation before
all this happen. You didn't say much about
it...so was your friend nicer about her
comments. Hope so.

Take care
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Old 02-29-2012, 03:49 AM   #1205
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For your MIL, your husband and you.
Know it's hard. Hope you all will have
peace soon.

Glad you had a few days vacation before
all this happen. You didn't say much about
it...so was your friend nicer about her
comments. Hope so.

Take care
BellaRose- My friend didn't have a chance to make any rude comments about what I ate because I stayed on plan when she was around. If I remember the time we were away, I stayed almost perfectly on plan.

Thank you for your kind words!

Raini
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Old 02-29-2012, 03:53 AM   #1206
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We just got the call less than 2 hours ago that MIL has passed away. I tried to get back to sleep, but dh isn't sleeping and got up to watch a video of his grandmother's funeral.

My head is pounding. I'm hoping for at least three hours of sleep before we have to begin this day. I still need to call family members, and one of the hardest will be ds#2. We never told him his grandma was dying because he doesn't handle this kind of news well and there was nothing he could do about it from 3000 miles away.
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Old 02-29-2012, 07:19 AM   #1207
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We just got the call less than 2 hours ago that MIL has passed away. I tried to get back to sleep, but dh isn't sleeping and got up to watch a video of his grandmother's funeral.

My head is pounding. I'm hoping for at least three hours of sleep before we have to begin this day. I still need to call family members, and one of the hardest will be ds#2. We never told him his grandma was dying because he doesn't handle this kind of news well and there was nothing he could do about it from 3000 miles away.
so sorry sweetie.... we know she is in a better place.. still make sit hard though.. my prayers with you and your family..
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Old 02-29-2012, 06:37 PM   #1208
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so sorry sweetie.... we know she is in a better place.. still make sit hard though.. my prayers with you and your family..
Thank you so much. Now I'm ready for some sleep.......
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Old 02-29-2012, 07:13 PM   #1209
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Thank you so much. Now I'm ready for some sleep.......
sleep well my friend.. sleep well..
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Old 02-29-2012, 07:47 PM   #1210
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Sorry

She's at peace now and your husband
doesn't have to worry about her being in pain.

You both take care and get some sleep, your
husband and family will need you.
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Old 03-01-2012, 04:46 PM   #1211
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I was so glad to get to bed last night, and fell asleep pretty quickly. Big Kitty woke me up at 7 am, which is early for me, but actually left me with nearly 8 hours of sleep which is wonderful.

Today has been hectic with people pulling me in all directions at once. This needs to be done, THAT needs to be done, can you do this for me now? Remember the song "Cinderella, Cinderella, Cinderella...?" An unexpected showing of relatives of a different faith wreaked havoc on what I thought was a well-planned out day. We were sure they were here to give their input on the service for MIL, but where were they when she was sick? Where were they when she was in the hospital? When she was dying? It turned out okay... dh met with them at SILs house while I was helping an acquaintance with a project she had. Dh just made it clear that the plans were all made, and they didn't make a fuss.

I'm going to work in some "me" time by making thank you cards to be ready for the wonderful people from our church that have been sending meals, and for some of the other things people are doing. It gives me an excuse to spend time in my studio and step away from the daily grind for a bit.

I need to plan meals for this week and next, and quit grabbing cake and snacks!
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Old 03-02-2012, 12:59 AM   #1212
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Isn't that the truth..

Where are the "people" when you need
help in caring for someone. Where are they
when the sick/dying person would like to see them.

"They" always come around to make "waves"
or to see what they can get. (things or money)
Not that your relatives were doing that. Speaking in
general.

Glad yours turned out well, that your husband spoke up.
It's nice that you have such good people from your
church helping out.

Yes take time for yourself. Don't forget to give your
husband a hug.
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Old 03-02-2012, 12:37 PM   #1213
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Where are the "people" when you need
help in caring for someone. Where are they
when the sick/dying person would like to see them.

"They" always come around to make "waves"
or to see what they can get. (things or money)
Not that your relatives were doing that. Speaking in
general.

Glad yours turned out well, that your husband spoke up.
It's nice that you have such good people from your
church helping out.

Yes take time for yourself. Don't forget to give your
husband a hug.
Thank you!!! Hugs always needed and always readily accepted!

These relatives were coming to have input on the memorial service and the burial. But they weren't here when she was in her group home, or when she was in the hospital. Never showed up to help with anything. They DID try to get here the night she was dying, but our last ferry to the island is 7:30 pm and they couldn't make that. Not sure why they didn't come a few days earlier, or last week, or...? Three live in the area... the only one with a real excuse lives over the mountains on the other end of the state.

Thank you again for your caring words and the hugs!
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Old 03-02-2012, 12:48 PM   #1214
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I've been messing up SO bad. Had a healthy breakfast yesterday (bacon and eggs) but lunch was lemon cake and orange angel food cake from SILs house, and then I had a snack of it later! What's WRONG with me???? Had a healthy dinner at the island's only restaurant... a chicken breast and salad; and at least I didn't eat cake again last night.

It's after noon and I still haven't eaten any breakfast. Almost afraid to start eating because apparently I don't know how to stop.

Had a really bad struggle with depression last night... cried myself to sleep and then dreamed I was eating, eating, eating. I just keep getting fatter and fatter and can't seem to make the turn-around. I don't need to be doing this when my poor dh is grieving over the loss of his mother!

We're going to have a houseful of family and guests next week-end for MILs service. I need to get the house ready as well as the RV for an over-flow guest room, and I need to plan meals that are easy to fix and easy to clean up after.

I'm planning most of the service, just because we are having it at our church. (It's not like others are unwilling... one BIL is formatting a slide show and his wife is ordering the memorial leaflets. It's just that there is so much to do on this end that the others can't help with.)

Feeling overwhelmed...

Last edited by raini; 03-02-2012 at 12:49 PM..
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Old 03-02-2012, 02:01 PM   #1215
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I've been messing up SO bad. Had a healthy breakfast yesterday (bacon and eggs) but lunch was lemon cake and orange angel food cake from SILs house, and then I had a snack of it later! What's WRONG with me???? Had a healthy dinner at the island's only restaurant... a chicken breast and salad; and at least I didn't eat cake again last night.

It's after noon and I still haven't eaten any breakfast. Almost afraid to start eating because apparently I don't know how to stop.

Had a really bad struggle with depression last night... cried myself to sleep and then dreamed I was eating, eating, eating. I just keep getting fatter and fatter and can't seem to make the turn-around. I don't need to be doing this when my poor dh is grieving over the loss of his mother!

We're going to have a houseful of family and guests next week-end for MILs service. I need to get the house ready as well as the RV for an over-flow guest room, and I need to plan meals that are easy to fix and easy to clean up after.

I'm planning most of the service, just because we are having it at our church. (It's not like others are unwilling... one BIL is formatting a slide show and his wife is ordering the memorial leaflets. It's just that there is so much to do on this end that the others can't help with.)

Feeling overwhelmed...
Its a new dayyyy... be good
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Old 03-02-2012, 05:28 PM   #1216
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Doing okay so far... breakfast of a bacon and cheese omelette. Dinner time and I haven't had lunch yet and have no plans for dinner. Oy-vay!

Exercised, took my meds and supplements and have been drinking more water than usual (that's not saying much though.)
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Old 03-02-2012, 08:35 PM   #1217
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Glad you slept..

Take it one day at a time till
everything is over and family has
gone home.

Always so much to do..sorry you have
to do most of it. Just try to relax inbetwwen.

More hugs sent your way for you and husband.
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Old 03-03-2012, 07:21 AM   #1218
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Take it one day at a time till
everything is over and family has
gone home.

Always so much to do..sorry you have
to do most of it. Just try to relax inbetwwen.

More hugs sent your way for you and husband.
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Old 03-03-2012, 10:24 AM   #1219
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Stayed 100% on program yesterday until almost bedtime... then "rewarded" myself with a small piece of both the lemon cake and the orange angel food cake, which equaled to at least one regular slice of cake, maybe bigger. I did ask dh to finish up those stupid things today before my will power gives way again.

Big snafu with the memorial service planning today. Dh has dyslexia (#1 excuse) and there are way too many times he just doesn't listen to me (#2 excuse.) So, SIL wanted our choir to sing at the service, and we're working on that. I told dh that we'd know Monday evening (at choir practice) if they will be able to participate in the service. (I don't think I will, even though I'm in the choir.)

So today he takes his sister over to the church so she can decide where she wants the flowers to go. She decided she'd cover the choir risers with flowers, because dh told her that the choir wouldn't be using that area! He came home and told me her plan, and I told him that we probably need to are for the choir. He got all mad at me, and then when I told his sister, SHE got all mad about it. I'm pretty hurt and angry about now.

They're expecting me to make the lion's share of the arrangements. I've checked and double-checked with everyone involved during each step to make sure they get exactly what they want. Last night, after I thought everything was agreed on, our pastor called and had some questions. I had to go back up and turn my computer back on. I had to call one SIL and then one BIL to go over things again. I had to wait and exchange another 4 lengthy e-mails with different people. I'm not feeling very appreciated, but I'm trying to remember that this is not about me. I'm just going to try to stay out of the way!
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Old 03-03-2012, 11:26 AM   #1220
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Hang in there...

This to shall pass,,,

In a week or two..hope everything
will be back to normal. Lot of stress
right now.
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Old 03-03-2012, 02:19 PM   #1221
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Stayed 100% on program yesterday until almost bedtime... then "rewarded" myself with a small piece of both the lemon cake and the orange angel food cake, which equaled to at least one regular slice of cake, maybe bigger. I did ask dh to finish up those stupid things today before my will power gives way again.

Big snafu with the memorial service planning today. Dh has dyslexia (#1 excuse) and there are way too many times he just doesn't listen to me (#2 excuse.) So, SIL wanted our choir to sing at the service, and we're working on that. I told dh that we'd know Monday evening (at choir practice) if they will be able to participate in the service. (I don't think I will, even though I'm in the choir.)

So today he takes his sister over to the church so she can decide where she wants the flowers to go. She decided she'd cover the choir risers with flowers, because dh told her that the choir wouldn't be using that area! He came home and told me her plan, and I told him that we probably need to are for the choir. He got all mad at me, and then when I told his sister, SHE got all mad about it. I'm pretty hurt and angry about now.

They're expecting me to make the lion's share of the arrangements. I've checked and double-checked with everyone involved during each step to make sure they get exactly what they want. Last night, after I thought everything was agreed on, our pastor called and had some questions. I had to go back up and turn my computer back on. I had to call one SIL and then one BIL to go over things again. I had to wait and exchange another 4 lengthy e-mails with different people. I'm not feeling very appreciated, but I'm trying to remember that this is not about me. I'm just going to try to stay out of the way!
.. its hard on everyone who has to plan this kinda thing.. and it will be over soon.. I am sure that DH appreciates everything you're doing.. but in this time.. he isn't showing it.. he will.. he just wanted everything to be perfect for his momma.. and its stressing him out... Not taking his side.. or anyones.. I just don't want you to take thuings so personal.. if it wasn't YOU setting everything up.. it would be someone else and they would be the same was with them... stress is a burger.. :/

love ya sweet pea..
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Old 03-04-2012, 06:47 PM   #1222
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love ya sweet pea..
Glad SOMEONE does! LOL It wasn't any better today, but I'll spare you the details. It'll be over in a week...
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Old 03-05-2012, 12:59 PM   #1223
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Glad SOMEONE does! LOL It wasn't any better today, but I'll spare you the details. It'll be over in a week...
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Old 03-05-2012, 11:14 PM   #1224
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Hang in There...

It will get better.
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Old 03-10-2012, 12:15 AM   #1225
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How are you?

Is everything over now..people gone?

Just you and your husband now?

Wishing you two a quiet weekend to rest and relax.
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Old 03-10-2012, 05:45 PM   #1226
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Is everything over now..people gone?

Just you and your husband now?

Wishing you two a quiet weekend to rest and relax.
I think it is.. maybe shes just gettingthings all cleaned up and back in order..

miss ya Raini..
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Old 03-11-2012, 12:19 PM   #1227
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How are you today Rain1?

Monet..Think your right...maybe to
much company. Cleaning and resting.

Also maybe husband needs her time
for now.

Hope to hear from you soon.
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Old 03-11-2012, 09:36 PM   #1228
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The memorial service was yesterday. A powerful service and a great message. The pastor's wife and son sang "When It's All Been Said and Done" (check youtube for Robin Mark's version... lyrics are beautiful.) We had a stringed trio play- violins and cello- darling girls who go to our church. I held together pretty well until the slide presentations photos of her last days. Then there were tears...

Our house has been full and noisy. Everyone left this afternoon and I am exhausted. I'll bet dh is asleep in front of the TV right now. I've been up in my studio making thank you cards but not having a lot of luck with how they are going together.

Found out that dd lied about having to work tonight and I'm hurt. I think she just wanted to get back to see her boyfriend. She took all week off school last week for "bereavement" but none of that was spent with us. Then she left early today, saying she had to be at work. I teased her about calling in sick on her behalf, and she made a sarcastic comment about was I going to pay her bills? But when I called her work to make sure she made it home okay, they said she wasn't scheduled to work tonight. And of course she's not answering her phone...

Just learned we have to go to the church and remove all the flowers without help from SIL tomorrow. Dh said he'd do it alone, but I'll help. We have to haul everything to SIL's garage so others can come pick up vases and such. It will be a whole trailer load. SIL does have a good excuse-- waiting for a grandbaby to be born on the mainland.

I did tell dh that I'm sleeping in tomorrow. Hope nothing wakes me up!!!

Thank you sweeties for caring!!!!
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Old 03-12-2012, 06:15 AM   #1229
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The memorial service was yesterday. A powerful service and a great message. The pastor's wife and son sang "When It's All Been Said and Done" (check youtube for Robin Mark's version... lyrics are beautiful.) We had a stringed trio play- violins and cello- darling girls who go to our church. I held together pretty well until the slide presentations photos of her last days. Then there were tears...

Our house has been full and noisy. Everyone left this afternoon and I am exhausted. I'll bet dh is asleep in front of the TV right now. I've been up in my studio making thank you cards but not having a lot of luck with how they are going together.

Found out that dd lied about having to work tonight and I'm hurt. I think she just wanted to get back to see her boyfriend. She took all week off school last week for "bereavement" but none of that was spent with us. Then she left early today, saying she had to be at work. I teased her about calling in sick on her behalf, and she made a sarcastic comment about was I going to pay her bills? But when I called her work to make sure she made it home okay, they said she wasn't scheduled to work tonight. And of course she's not answering her phone...

Just learned we have to go to the church and remove all the flowers without help from SIL tomorrow. Dh said he'd do it alone, but I'll help. We have to haul everything to SIL's garage so others can come pick up vases and such. It will be a whole trailer load. SIL does have a good excuse-- waiting for a grandbaby to be born on the mainland.

I did tell dh that I'm sleeping in tomorrow. Hope nothing wakes me up!!!

Thank you sweeties for caring!!!!
Hey sweetie.. I am glad to hear everything went ok...I'll have to check out that song..

sorry DD lied.. ..

I do hope you gte to sleep in

good hearing from you..
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Old 03-12-2012, 11:20 AM   #1230
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Bad emotional start to the day, but I did stay on track with the food so far. Then popped in a piece of chewing gum to keep my mouth busy!

Lots to do today.... ended up having to clear all the flowers from the church, even though after all that we found out that SIL was on the island after all! I didn't mind helping- I just wanted to sleep in and didn't get to. Hopefully I'll get some rest this week and won't be so crabby!
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