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Old 02-25-2011, 12:20 AM   #571
Way too much time on my hands!
 
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stay strong, sweets! Be proud . . . remember, you are in control of the food and it's not the food that's in control of you!
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Old 02-25-2011, 06:23 AM   #572
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NOW IF i CAN ONLY GET THAT ONE IN MY HEAD TO STAY...;LOL

oops.. sorry about the caps..

Raini... I can't sleep when I am hot.. so I like it chili in our room..lol.. then cuddle up in the blankies.. but if its too hot... I can't cuddle up... the hubs is like a furnace.. hot hot hot.. heat just radiates form him..lol... so the temps have to be low when I got to bed.. or I am up alll night..
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Old 02-25-2011, 07:11 PM   #573
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Hang in there. You are in my thoughts and prayers!
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Old 02-25-2011, 10:25 PM   #574
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Well please keep praying... I'm so ticked I could spit!!!

Here I thought that we missed "the viewing" because SIL and dh didn't communicate well. Then we were told there would be no graveside service today... that the kids all said their good-byes to their mom and the funeral park would just bury her with no service. Well...

Dh and I decided to go to the mainland and try to get all our shopping done today instead of trying to do it tomorrow in a hurry and then rushing to pick up his blind sister and her blind husband for the memorial service. I was still confused about conflicting info-- the nephews said "no service" but the funeral home said there was a service at 2:30. I figured it was a temp. worker or someone who just misunderstood. So we drove by the funeral home, and lo and behold, there was SIL's name and the time of her service on a big sign in the driveway. We went in and spoke with the funeral director. At first, he said "Yes, there is a service today at 2:30. We'll all meet in the back room and then drive in a procession to the grave site." I looked at my watch, and it was a few minutes after noon. I was thinking about dh's other sister, the one who lives near us on the island--- I knew that she would be there if she knew there was a service. I called her and said,"I guess there is a service after all." She was wearing sweats and was cleaning out her garage. She looked at her watch and said, "I can't possibly come. The ferry is leaving in less than 20 minutes and there's no way I can be ready." I assured her that we were both in jeans and jackets, and she didn't need to dress up. I also told her that if she couldn't make it, that was fine. I didn't want to upset her... I just didn't want her to miss it if she wanted to be there. She said she'd think about it and see what she could do.

So after I hung up, the funeral director came back in the room and said that maybe he misunderstood, and maybe no one was coming to the graveside after all. Great! So I called SIL back and relayed that info to her. She said, "I'm on my way out the door and I'm coming right now. Don't leave!" We all knew that if she missed that ferry, the next one would be at 2:40 and she'd miss the service, IF there was one! We'd also decided that even if no one else came, the three of us would be there and go to the graveside when they took late-SIL there.

SIL showed up a little after 1p. We all viewed the body (having been told there would be no viewing available) and SIL let go of a lot of emotions that had been bottled up. Clearly she needed this! Dh later said it was good for him, too... even though none of us are keen on viewing bodies.

We ran out for a quick lunch, and told the funeral director we'd be back for the service... if there was one. Oh yeah... there was a service! Our three nephews and their families were all there, and I was so naive when one mumbled something about a "last minute change of plans" and they were sorry they couldn't let us know in time. I bought it hook, line and sinker. Then, as we were getting into our cars for the procession, our sweet little niece ran up to my side of the car and pounded on my door. I opened it and she reached in and started crying and hugging me. She said, "I'm so glad you came! The boys didn't want you here and I told them that Mama would want you here but they didn't listen to me. I got out-voted."

I am so thankful that I believed the best about them when I realized there was a service. God shielded us from realizing what had just happened until we had time to calm down. I didn't have to pretend I wasn't mad, because I wasn't mad... yet! It was after our niece told us what had happened that I put all the pieces together. We missed the "viewing" (which they called just "a dressing") because they know darn well what the ferry schedule is and called just late enough that we couldn't have gone anyway. Then they lied about not having a service. Yes, I know that often the family wants a private burial. But you know what? My dh and SILs and BILs have been family long before those little twerps were family! And their mother was loved by her brothers and sisters, and she loved them. So 3 of them didn't get to go to the graveside service at all (and don't even know there was one yet!)

Oh... and the funeral director? We saw him outside with one of the nephews just before the procession. Turns out they were long-time friends. I don't think he knew what the boys were up to at first, but then figured it out and came in to tell us that "maybe he was mistaken" about the service! Trying to cover for the boys.

How did we handle it? I told our niece that she didn't need to be upset with her brothers. I told her that "they are going to be your brothers for the rest of your life and you need to get along with them." I told SIL and dh that we need to stay calm and not make a big deal out of it. I've seen families torn apart by stuff like this, and we need to just let it go. Easier said than done, I know, but I've been working on that Bible verse all week... "Whether you eat or drink, or WHATEVER you do, do it all for the glory of God." Our religious views differ greatly from the nephews, and maybe that's why they wanted to exclude us. But God worked it out so we could be there. I wonder if they think that what they did was pleasing to God?

I just had to vent... better in front of people who don't know all my in-laws that those who do!!! Y'all might pray that we can genuinely love on our nephews and their families tomorrow, and put away all bitterness. And pray that the two brothers and other sister that missed the graveside service will handle it okay, too. The next 24 hours are going to be emotional ones!

Heading to bed... oh... stayed on plan all day. Worried about tomorrow... blind SIL wants us to take them for lunch and then there's a spaghetti dinner after the memorial service. I need to stay on plan and don't know how I can sit and watch everyone eat pizza for lunch (no decent salad available) and then eat spaghetti for dinner and not have food available for me. But I'm sure God will work it out...
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Old 02-26-2011, 06:27 AM   #575
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WOW.. .. you handled it well ..

prayers for you all

have a great day sweetie pie
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Old 02-26-2011, 08:08 AM   #576
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Oh RainiI am so proud of the way you handled it. I could have not done it that way.You can teach me alot!
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Old 02-26-2011, 08:55 PM   #577
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Yeah... sweet on the outside and grumbling on the inside! At least God kept my mouth shut!

The memorial service was this evening. We just got home after a long day off-island. First we finished up shopping that didn't get done yesterday. Then we picked up bling SIL and her blind husband and met other SIL and BIL for lunch at Red Robin. Then off to the service, where two of the nephews pretty much ignored us. When they did speak to us once, the referred to us by our first names instead of Aunt and Uncle like they used to. Sounds like maybe we've been disowned because we are not of their religion. (Dh is an ex-member of their religion, by his choice when we became Christians.) Anyway, one nephew was still lovable, and our niece still loves us... but she is pretty much an outcast to her brothers.

Long day... glad it's over. STAYED ON PLAN!!! Salad and a lettuce-wrapped burger at Red Robin, and ham and salad after the memorial service.

Hoping to do just about nothing after church tomorrow. Dh is really exhausted... rarely complains but mentioned it this evening.
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Old 02-27-2011, 01:38 PM   #578
Way too much time on my hands!
 
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You go girl! Stayed on plan while all that drama is going on! YOU ROCK!
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Old 02-27-2011, 03:49 PM   #579
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You go girl! Stayed on plan while all that drama is going on! YOU ROCK!
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Old 02-27-2011, 05:34 PM   #580
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LOL- Just noticed that I called my blind SIL a "bling" SIL in an earlier post. She'd probably be laughing pretty hard at that one!

We are SO tired, and while dh usually doesn't show it and won't admit to it, he is really exhausted. He thinks that it's not just that he lost his sister... he thinks it has a lot to do with the way the nephews treated us. I'm trying to get him to sit down and relax, but he has changed and washed our bedding, vacuumed our bedroom, done other laundry, taken out the garbage, taken out the compost, and probably a dozen other things. Of course that means I can't sit around either without feeling guilty. So no rest for the weary here!

We turned down the offers for friends to bring meals, since another friend died the same day as SIL and they also are taking meals to her daughter. This is a small island and folks can get worn out! But I bought a roasted chicken at Costco, so we'll have that and a salad tonight.

More work to be done on the house tomorrow, and maybe we're going back to the mainland on Tuesday for a vet appt. and other stuff. Just wishing we had a week with nothing to do so we could get away... even for a few days. <sigh>
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Old 02-27-2011, 05:41 PM   #581
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yeah.. I bet it weighing heavy on his mind.. I'm like that.. if something really worries me.. I clean..lol.. good thing I don't worry to much.. kiddin.. :P

you both should sleep well tonight.. and maybe soon will you get to just relaxxxx for a few days !..
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Old 02-27-2011, 05:50 PM   #582
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Can I borrow him for a while! I have LOADS to clean!
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Old 02-27-2011, 07:18 PM   #583
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Can I borrow him for a while! I have LOADS to clean!
He usually putters around outside... chopping wood, building fences, transplanting shrubs or bushes, tinkering with stuff in the garage... that kind of stuff. When the good weather comes back, he will be outside and won't give a second look to the house! LOL But I'm sure thankful for all the help right now!
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Old 02-27-2011, 07:19 PM   #584
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yeah.. I bet it weighing heavy on his mind.. I'm like that.. if something really worries me.. I clean..lol.. good thing I don't worry to much.. kiddin.. :P

you both should sleep well tonight.. and maybe soon will you get to just relaxxxx for a few days !..
I'm glad he's wanting to clean in order to de-stress. In the "olden days" he'd want to drink!
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Old 02-27-2011, 07:33 PM   #585
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Gotta mention dinner tonight. YUMMMM!

So I bought a Costco roasted chicken so dinner would be easy. This evening I made a salad with romaine lettuce, avocado, cucumbers, jicama and cilantro. I squeezed some lime juice over all of it, and then added just a tiny bit of agave syrup... and I do mean tiny-- less than a teaspoon for a big salad.

Then I did a stir-fry with zucchini, sweet onions and mushrooms. When a friend called (to tell me her brother had died!!!) I let dh take over in the kitchen. He cooked the veggies until they were "very done" and the onions were carmelized. Not what I would have done, but they were yummy.

Along with the chicken, the salad and veggies made for a delicious dinner. Dh plans to make soup with the leftover chicken tomorrow.
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Old 02-27-2011, 07:58 PM   #586
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Yes we got snow although its gone now. Now rainy and windy. Last night I played Bunko with some girlfriends and slid down a hill on the way home. I honestly thought I was going to crash my company car again!!!! It was a sheet of ice. Do you have snow/ice tonight? Wish we lived closer, it would be nice to have a close friend doing this WOE.
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Old 02-28-2011, 11:44 AM   #587
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We had a lot of rain, hail and wind last night. It reminded me of a big storm at the beach (which I miss!) The rain washed away all the last traces of snow. I was thankful we didn't have any more trees land on our house.

Yes, it would be nice to have someone closer... like D and Lisa are! I had good friends on Atkins when we lived in Portland, but no one lives close to me now that I know of.
*****************
After my horrid gain last week, I'd lost 4.5 pounds when I weighed this morning. And I feel like I'm retaining some fluids, so maybe I actually lost even more. I just need to keep going! Thank you Lord!

I've spent most of the morning on ******, so won't be posting much here today.
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Old 02-28-2011, 01:03 PM   #588
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I love it when I drop a bunch of water weight! Kudos to you . . . just keep on keepin' on, Raini!!
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Old 02-28-2011, 01:43 PM   #589
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We had a lot of rain, hail and wind last night. It reminded me of a big storm at the beach (which I miss!) The rain washed away all the last traces of snow. I was thankful we didn't have any more trees land on our house.

Yes, it would be nice to have someone closer... like D and Lisa are! I had good friends on Atkins when we lived in Portland, but no one lives close to me now that I know of.
*****************
After my horrid gain last week, I'd lost 4.5 pounds when I weighed this morning. And I feel like I'm retaining some fluids, so maybe I actually lost even more. I just need to keep going! Thank you Lord!

I've spent most of the morning on ******, so won't be posting much here today.
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Old 02-28-2011, 08:28 PM   #590
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Another great day, food-wise. No exercise, though.

Breakfast was an Atkins' shake because I was busy on the computer and didn't get breakfast fixed before the contractor came to work on our stairs and fireplace.

Lunch was a bowl of low-carb chili, topped with melted cheese. Kudos to dh for getting out of the freezer and reminding me to eat it! I also finished up the last of last night's salad.

Dinner was a big bowl of yummy chicken vegetable soup, homemade by my dear dh because it is too cold to go outside still! He's finally understanding about which veggies are low-carb, and is proud to only have LC veggies in the soup he makes for me! This one had bean sprouts, green beans, onions (a few), celery and jicama. What a great guy! I made some Cheese Crackers from Kraft Deluxe Cheese slices to go with my soup.

I may have a cup of LC cocoa tonight while we watch TV.

I told dh that staying on LC is easy IF the food is available and ready to eat! If not, it's really hard! Right now he is doing a lot to make sure I can stick with it, and I really appreciate his efforts.
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Old 03-01-2011, 07:05 AM   #591
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Another great day, food-wise. No exercise, though.

Breakfast was an Atkins' shake because I was busy on the computer and didn't get breakfast fixed before the contractor came to work on our stairs and fireplace.

Lunch was a bowl of low-carb chili, topped with melted cheese. Kudos to dh for getting out of the freezer and reminding me to eat it! I also finished up the last of last night's salad.

Dinner was a big bowl of yummy chicken vegetable soup, homemade by my dear dh because it is too cold to go outside still! He's finally understanding about which veggies are low-carb, and is proud to only have LC veggies in the soup he makes for me! This one had bean sprouts, green beans, onions (a few), celery and jicama. What a great guy! I made some Cheese Crackers from Kraft Deluxe Cheese slices to go with my soup.

I may have a cup of LC cocoa tonight while we watch TV.

I told dh that staying on LC is easy IF the food is available and ready to eat! If not, it's really hard! Right now he is doing a lot to make sure I can stick with it, and I really appreciate his efforts.
GREAT HUBBY!!
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Old 03-02-2011, 05:32 PM   #592
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I need to start exercising again. I got out of the habit of doing so when we had all the construction workers here every day.

I'm staying on track with my food, and dh has been great and very supportive lately. Not counting last night, when we knew we wouldn't be home until late and dh had eaten a huge lunch so he wasn't hungry for dinner. I kept my mouth shut, even though I was hungry and kind of felt like I might cry. I survived...

Choir practice tonight. Gotta run!
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Old 03-03-2011, 10:00 AM   #593
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Dh came through for me again! Just as we ran out of leftover chicken to use for quick meals, he asked if he should bring in some hamburger for "crack slaw" or something else with cabbage. One of my biggest problems is not figuring out what to fix until its time to eat, and then of course I have nothing ready when I'm hungry. Bless his heart!

He also froze some of his yummy chicken vegetable soup for me this week, and then thawed it out yesterday so I will have soup to take to the craft group today. I'll make some of my cheese crackers so go with it, and I'm all set.

As if that wasn't enough, he asked me to tell the ladies that he will provide homemade soup for next week's meal. It will be a treat for me to be eating the same food as everyone else for a change!

We're having company over for dinner on Saturday. Dh is fixing beef brisket. I'll bake some potatoes for dh and company, and maybe try a new "faux potato" recipe I've thought of for me. (I'll share it if it works out well.) I'll also fix a nice salad with cucumbers, celery, romaine, avocado, cilantro and lime juice. (I made this last week, and it was the first time in history that dh had a bottle of dressing next to him but decided the salad was so good he didn't want to ruin it with dressing!)

Our guests are bringing rolls or some kind of bread. We've eaten with them often enough that I know they always have a lot of bread with their meals. So when she asked what she could bring, I suggested the rolls. Then I don't have to deal with buying them, or having leftover bread here to worry about.

**********************
The memorial service for our friend that died the same day as dh's sister is this Sunday. I know what is being served, so I know what I need to take for myself for a main dish. Then I'll add LC coleslaw and a LC gelatin dessert for my part in the potluck.
I bought an apple pie for dessert, but I'm not having any. I will need to come up with something else for me to have for dessert, though. I know me well enough to know that I won't be happy watching them eat dessert if I don't have any.
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Old 03-03-2011, 01:33 PM   #594
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Dh came through for me again! Just as we ran out of leftover chicken to use for quick meals, he asked if he should bring in some hamburger for "crack slaw" or something else with cabbage. One of my biggest problems is not figuring out what to fix until its time to eat, and then of course I have nothing ready when I'm hungry. Bless his heart!

He also froze some of his yummy chicken vegetable soup for me this week, and then thawed it out yesterday so I will have soup to take to the craft group today. I'll make some of my cheese crackers so go with it, and I'm all set.

As if that wasn't enough, he asked me to tell the ladies that he will provide homemade soup for next week's meal. It will be a treat for me to be eating the same food as everyone else for a change!

We're having company over for dinner on Saturday. Dh is fixing beef brisket. I'll bake some potatoes for dh and company, and maybe try a new "faux potato" recipe I've thought of for me. (I'll share it if it works out well.) I'll also fix a nice salad with cucumbers, celery, romaine, avocado, cilantro and lime juice. (I made this last week, and it was the first time in history that dh had a bottle of dressing next to him but decided the salad was so good he didn't want to ruin it with dressing!)

Our guests are bringing rolls or some kind of bread. We've eaten with them often enough that I know they always have a lot of bread with their meals. So when she asked what she could bring, I suggested the rolls. Then I don't have to deal with buying them, or having leftover bread here to worry about.

**********************
The memorial service for our friend that died the same day as dh's sister is this Sunday. I know what is being served, so I know what I need to take for myself for a main dish. Then I'll add LC coleslaw and a LC gelatin dessert for my part in the potluck.
I bought an apple pie for dessert, but I'm not having any. I will need to come up with something else for me to have for dessert, though. I know me well enough to know that I won't be happy watching them eat dessert if I don't have any.
HEY girly.. sounds like you have everything planned out.... you should do well at your weigh in
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Old 03-04-2011, 01:45 PM   #595
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Did well at the service and meal afterward. We had lunch at Red Robin, and I had the special burger wrapped in lettuce.

I woke up really sick this morning. At first I thought maybe my throat was just sore from maybe sleeping with my mouth open or something (catching flies?) LOL But then I started coughing and my chest feels like it's being ripped apart. So yeah.. I'm sick.

We're supposed to have a houseful of company for dinner and Wii tomorrow evening. Not sure it's gonna happen now. I told dh I would work around the house a bit today to get things ready, just in case I'm feeling okay tomorrow.
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Old 03-04-2011, 05:28 PM   #596
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Did well at the service and meal afterward. We had lunch at Red Robin, and I had the special burger wrapped in lettuce.

I woke up really sick this morning. At first I thought maybe my throat was just sore from maybe sleeping with my mouth open or something (catching flies?) LOL But then I started coughing and my chest feels like it's being ripped apart. So yeah.. I'm sick.

We're supposed to have a houseful of company for dinner and Wii tomorrow evening. Not sure it's gonna happen now. I told dh I would work around the house a bit today to get things ready, just in case I'm feeling okay tomorrow.
ugh... get well girly!.. don't breathe on me..
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Old 03-04-2011, 06:12 PM   #597
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Originally Posted by monet0329 View Post
ugh... get well girly!.. don't breathe on me..
I wanna know who breathed on ME!

You should hear our conversation here. Dh first said that if I was sick, we simply wouldn't go ahead with the dinner party. Now he's all excited about having the party, and I'm saying, "But I'm sick!" So he says, "That's okay. I'm fixing most of the food anyway!" And I go, "But I'm SICK! I don't WANT people over here if I'm sick!" So he says, "Lots of people are sick. They could catch what you have anywhere else just as easily." And I say, "But I'm SICK! I don't want company here if I am sick! THEY don't want to get sick. I don't WANT them to get sick. I feel awful!!! I don't want people here when I feel awful!."

"But I'm fixing most of the food anyway..."

I'm never gonna hear the end of this. Dh just lost his sainthood... in my eyes.... for today...
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Old 03-04-2011, 08:01 PM   #598
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Raini View Post
I wanna know who breathed on ME!

You should hear our conversation here. Dh first said that if I was sick, we simply wouldn't go ahead with the dinner party. Now he's all excited about having the party, and I'm saying, "But I'm sick!" So he says, "That's okay. I'm fixing most of the food anyway!" And I go, "But I'm SICK! I don't WANT people over here if I'm sick!" So he says, "Lots of people are sick. They could catch what you have anywhere else just as easily." And I say, "But I'm SICK! I don't want company here if I am sick! THEY don't want to get sick. I don't WANT them to get sick. I feel awful!!! I don't want people here when I feel awful!."

"But I'm fixing most of the food anyway..."

I'm never gonna hear the end of this. Dh just lost his sainthood... in my eyes.... for today...
.. some days.. they are wonderful.. some days they aren't so wonderful.. but.. that's a man for ya.... OK.. I am sure they feel the same way about us .....

enjoy.. or shall I say/.. TRY to enjoy your party..

I am kinda having one next weekend.. just a few friends over.. haven't decided yet if we are going out.. or if I am cooking.... would be nice of the weather would decide to be nice.. we could cook out .. we shall see..
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Old 03-05-2011, 09:45 AM   #599
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UGH . . . what does it matter if he's fixing the food? He obviously wants these people to come over and is NOT taking your feelings into consideration . . . yeah . . . I would strip him of his sainthood right about now as well . . .
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Old 03-06-2011, 05:21 PM   #600
Very Gabby LCF Member!!!
 
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I certainly hope no one is reading this that knows my dh personally... 'cuz he's gonna get raked over the coals right now and it ain't gonna be pretty! And, when I am healthy again, and he is treating me better, I'm sure I'll take it all back. But right now I'm

No party yesterday, and he seemed okay with that. Three of the guests were thinking of canceling anyway, since they were sick. The other couple didn't pick up their message, and would have ended up showing up if I hadn't called them again. Then SHE said she was worried that she might catch what I have because she gave my dh a hug the day before. Sheesh!

The brisket turned out beautifully. Dh brought me one bite into our bedroom. Today he brought home a plate of lettuce from the memorial potluck. No dressing. No fork. Didn't offer to help me get any and I didn't ask. I remember the days, early in our marriage, when he used to say, "If you're healthy enough to eat, then you're healthy enough to come to the dining room to eat." I think he knows better than to say that now, but he still acts like that is the case.

Last night my temperature was 102.5 and then sky-rocketed to over 104.5. I was trying not to freak out... it was late, and the only way off-island was by Fire Department boat or Life Flight. Dh did bring me some ice, and I used it on my forehead, my neck, my throat and my jaw mostly. Other places, as well, but mostly around my head.
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