Amy B's....Decision Time

[Amyb1569]

153...OUCH....pizzia toppings..bad bad bad idea.

I am swollen today...so who knows. I am not worrying..nope I am not.
I am on my way to a day filled with appts. Oncologist and then lab and then a scan. It will be a filled day.
The funny thing is...today is a day the workers will not be here. It would be nice to be home when no one is here..Oh well.
My kitchen is looking really pretty...and well worth it.
My big goal is now my laundry. Jim umm....sucks at doing wash...and the kids..well they learned from their dad...lol
If you guys hear about a lack of water in Florida it is just my house trying to do 12 loads of wash...
I may talk Jim into the laundry mat..it can be expensive but could be well worth it..and very needed.

I am going to try for a good food day..some soft well balanced food.

On appt days I really feel like eating off plan and lot's of it...but deep down I know that the fast food does not help anything...BUT I STILL WANT IT....I DO I REALLY DO...

Oh sorry I needed a moment...lol

[2big4mysize]

Swollen from your meds or your pizza? if it is swollen from the pizza toppings could be you are allergic to one or more of them as many folk swell when they have a food allergy and reintroduce a food during OWL.

fast food can be great Atkins food if you order according to your phase. Since you haven't announced if you are induction or OWL the menus will vary but Hardees has a low carb wrapped burger and you can actually get any burger on the menu low carbed so when you are able to swallow againg think there. Oh and they do not have low carb fries so do not be fooled when they ask you if you want to make it a combo. LOL
As long as the chicken in your salad is grilled not breaded just about every fastfood burger place has serveral you can pick from.
Mexican fast food it a little tougher to pick from but can be done as long as no chips nor shells are eatten. Just think if them as disposible bowls your food is served in.
Skip the itialina as fast food meatballs are ususally filled with bread too. SUb places can be tricky too as many of the meat choices have lots of fillers.
Our local fish place has grilled veggies and fish so you can low carb it just ask them not to put it on the bed of rice.

Laundry you are on your own. I had issues lifting the wet stuff out so I put Mother to work doing the transferring but she is easier to bribe then your kids I'm sure.

[This time]

Amyb, I am so sorry that Philip is having a very bad day Not a day goes by without my and thoughts for you and Philip.......Linda

[2big4mysize]

hey AMYB I just saw on your other blog you are on antibiotics. could your swelling be a reaction to them?

[rebel]

I've got you on my mind ...

[vernswifevickie]

Good morning Amy!!! I just wanted to say hi and tell you that you are, as always, in my thoughts and prayers.

[Amyb1569]

Oh my....I am just a sucky stick to anything gal right now. I had some serious thoughts last night..that I want to share here with myself..so maybe I will be forced to find the answers along the way..

What do I do when I am just not into it?

What does that mean...that I do not care enough? Want it bad enough? ( Gosh I hate that statement).

Does it matter anymmore...losing weight?

I just feel awful and sick and yuck. Okay I dumped...and here comes my famous line..this will pass..and I will get better and stronger..But along the way I am feeling fat frumpy and sick.

Well...I am 157.5 today..I am going to try to start again....I just do not have the WANT in me...and yet I do not WANT to be heavy and unfit ...soo....yep ...I will fake it till I make it...

Please tell me I can make it. Cause ya know what...I need to feel like I can do something...

So the first plan is to make a plan of action for food..

I will start with this...

BACON CHEESEBURGER CASSEROLE
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

1 pound ground beef
1 egg
Mushrooms if wanted
4 ounces shredded cheddar cheese
4 ounces shredded mozzarella cheese
3 to 5 slices of bacon (cooked and crumbled)
garlic powder to taste
black pepper to taste
chili powder to taste

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Lightly brown beef and drain well.
Mix all ingredients together except Mozzarella.
Press mixture into small casserole dish and top with Mozzarella.
Bake in the oven for 25 to 30 minutes.
Cheese should be melted and lightly browned.

[2big4mysize]

Why dont you just try to do maintnenance right now.
Practice carb harm intervention while you are not very motivated. When you realize you are eating a not good for you food stop and make the very next bite back on plan. Don't give yourself permission to be off plan the rest of the day. Don't say i will restart tomorrow.
On Maintnenace you can eat thealthy fats proteins and carbs just not junky food carbs and not sugar filled stuff. Eat the good for you veggies berries melons and fruits. Eat the healthy for you veggies and some proteins too. They you are doing Atkins and when you get motivated you can remove a few extra carbs from your eating and you are losing weight ion a healthy slow manner.

Remember blood sugfar control is an important reason to low carb for you. diabetic complications are not something you want to spend the rest of your life worrying about.

[Amyb1569]

YOU are right...

I am not ready to give up my attempts at induction But I also think I can take your advice. I am going to work towards the induction and if I just can not do it I will do the OWL...or maintenance.

Where the heck is my will power?

[rebel]

Originally Posted by Amyb1569

Where the heck is my will power?

It must have run off with mine!

[Amyb1569]

Can you find yours and mine too?

BTW Love ya Miss rebel

[This time]

Originally Posted by Amyb1569

Can you find yours and mine too?

BTW Love ya Miss rebel

I will make you a deal....if you both find mine, then I will look for yours

[PalmTreeGal]

I understand . . . the motivation can be hard to find, especially when you've been off a while. Now that I have several successful months under my belt it feels like the momentum carries me some days when I feel weak. The only advice I have is to load up on fat and protein, the casserole you posted looks perfect. And for me I have to keep the bad stuff out of the house, DH keeps his treats on a shelf above my head. I don't know how doable that is in your family.

[This time]

If there were a treat under the floorboards of my house....I would dig it up and fight the dogs for it

[2big4mysize]

this is going to sound overly simplified but if you think about your carb eating as an adiction then when the cost to you phyiscally mentally and financially of eating the carb foods exceeds the enjoyment you derive from eating them you will stop. It really is that simple BUT there are many factors involved in that enjoyment including the pharacological effects meany foods have on our bodies like chocolate. We need to find other means to medicate that which we are using the carb foods to do. The detailed food journaling with those Ws would help that but right now you don't seem to be able to handle that along wiht the high stress of your medical and Philips medical issues. When you are ready you will be amazed at how well you stick on plan, but until then it will be a struggle and that is why carb harm prevention becomes so important.

[This time]

Did someone say CHOCOLATE!!..........Just joking around

[vernswifevickie]

Hey Amy...just poking my head in to say hi. I'm praying for you my friend.

[This time]

Amybwe are here for you to lean on.........so lean......Linda

[Amyb1569]

You know what...I adore you guys...Now when I read that you would fight the dogs for a treat it lets me know...we are family and bonded...lol

Vickie...how is the lunch diet thingy going? Tell me...

2big...I have chicken in the crockpot....and now I am thinking veggies..

Mandy..you are a example to follow...great job.

[2big4mysize]

oh boy crockpot chicken. and you can make yummy soup afterwards.

I got a pot of pumpkin curry soup going right now that I will be adding either cooked sausage or cooked diced chicken to the bowl when i consume it.

If you like curry it is good and simple just curry powder chopped onions and garlic if you like can of pumpkin and quart of chicken stock in fat of your choice.
I've use coconut milk/oil ofr cocnut flavors wiht lower carbs, I've used EEOV and I've used chicken fat so far in making different batches. I like the cocnut pumpkin curry with chicken the best. didn't like it at all with fish chunks but pork was okay.

[Amyb1569]

Well I am not sure what I am going to do with it but I put 7 frozen breast in there and now I am thinking...lol
But it is a good base to start with..

So I have now given myself some stables...

I have 3/4 pound boars head roast beef...
a thing of egg salad
a thing of chicken salad
and well the crock pot of chicken
I also have some cabbage...love my cabbage
I have two bags of salad
some so missed from KK starving days Full Fat ranch dressing
and some other odd and ends.

[2big4mysize]

you can swallow tossed salads now? good for you!

you can flavor your chicken at the time you eat it I do that with mine bake a bunch just to the internal safe temp and then put my fat source and herbs and/or spices in the pan heat it up and brown the outside of the chicken with the flavored oils. Yum yum and never bored.

[vernswifevickie]

Vickie...how is the lunch diet thingy going? Tell me...

Well...truthfully...I've been screwing around and going on and off plan and making excuses...and all that kind of crap...so yesterday I started 2 weeks of staying on plan...no cheating...no excuses. Sort of a challenge I challenged myself with. So now I am on day 2 of staying strictly on plan...we'll talk about how it's going in a couple of weeks...ok?...LOL

However...in the middle of all that screwing around stuff, Miss Autumn and I had a wonderful cupcake baking/decorating, Grandma Honey & Miss Autumn sleep-over. We wore our cute new jammies and baked and decorated and sprinkled cupcakes and watched Madagascar in bed while we tried really hard to keep our eyes open through the whole movie....we giggled and snuggled and were completely silly and carefree....and had a weekend in which Miss Autumn got to just be a four year old having fun with Grandma and all the "Daddy doesn't live in our house anymore" stuff was far far away.

How are you feeling my friend?

[Amyb1569]

Oh now that sounds like fun...any pics of you in your matching cute jammies? LOL

You are just the kind of grandmama I wanna be...Good for you and wonderful for Autumn...
She will ALWAYS remember these times with you...

[rebel]

Oohhh, how I love Agnes... Ok, where were we?

I finally got up the nerve to get on the scales after months of avoiding them. Funny, since for a while, I would get up in the middle of the night to see if I had lost anything. I lost somewhere around 60 pounds at KK's. I have gained about 20 pounds of it back. I can't really complain since I have eaten everything that didn't eat me first!

This week, I cooked a pork roast aka Boston Butt in the crockpot. My aunt said to put it in and cook it with no water. It was great. I also had green beans with hamhock. Today, I had some steak and broccoli with butter. I really feel better eating this way, but it takes a lot of work and planning. I felt crappy eating the sweets and bread, so I don't even know why I do that. It feels good at the time -- then, reality sets in.

[vernswifevickie]

Hey Reb!!!! Hi! It's like a reunion in here now! Agnes is awfully cute, isn't she? She's asleep in the chair next to me right now. She's so mischevious but oh-so-cute! So, how cool is it that you only gained 20 pounds back post kimkins!? Me...I gained back everything I lost...well almost...I think I weigh about 7 pounds less than I did when I started KK. Oh well...some of us had to learn the hard way about stupid, starvation diets, huh? It's great to run into you here. I've missed you.

Amy....thanks for letting me visit my other buddy in your journal! I didn't get any PJ pics this time. Well...I didn't get any of ME...but I got some awfully cute ones of miss autumn. I love being her Grandma Honey more than I can ever begin to tell you!

So...how are you doing? Are you staying on plan, eating healthy, feeling any better? How is Philip? You are both in my prayers....always

[Amyb1569]

I told you guys this is OUR journal..I NEED this...so keep on coming.

Now you wanna see some kitty pictures...okay check back...lol

20 pounds..good job..serious...I can gain 20 pounds in a week...nah..but close. You are doing great getting back on plan...

[rebel]

Hey! Vickie! I've been here, you just didn't "see" me. I have missed ya'll, too, and I miss this. It's nice we can still feel this close after all the things we have been through. Vickie and I bailed out of KK's at the same time.

Amyb, I always like to take up residence in your journal. It's the fun place to be. It's also a very honest place to be. I really like that.

I am surprised that I only gained 20 pounds. I was really dreading those scales. I went from one extreme to the other. From weighing a couple times a day to not weighing at all. Of course, I have a lot more to lose than ya'll do. I still have a ways to go. I will just feel better when I get under my lowest weight at KK's and leave her behind.

Ok, lots to do today, and I'm still without internet at my new office. The local electric company and TVA are working on a grant to bring fiber optics in to the building. I don't know a lot about it, but I'm hearing that it will be great.

If you are all good, I will list the names of all my pets -- 3 dogs and 6 cats. I can't believe I just wrote that. My mother used to call me Ellie Mae Clampett.

[This time]

Hey Vickie..Hey Rebel.....All that we are missing, are a few good fart jokes...........Amy you're my gal...........Linda

[This time]

Rebel, stop showing off, I have 2 dogs and 5 cats..So far