Starting Over at 40

[ll__raine__ll]

hi and welcome to my journal.

i have just found and joined this site as today i am starting the low carb way of eating again. in saying, "again", i guess it's obvious i've done this before. i think it was around 2002 that i first started low carbing and i lost over 60 lbs, most of it in the first 6 month and i was absolutely stoked with the results.

i managed to keep most of the weight off for around 4 years with minimal effort, then slowly but surely got back into bad eating habits with the predictable outcome of gaining all bar a few pounds of my heaviest weight back. well enough is enough ... today is the beginning of a new start.

about me

i am 39 years old, in september i turn 40. i'm am single and raising two children, a daughter who is 15 and a son who is 6. about two years ago i moved from the top of the south island of new zealand to the bottom. (i basically live at the bottom of the civilized world) since moving down here away from my father and friends i've pretty much stuck to myself and led a sedentary life.

i enjoy reading and writing, online computer games, dvds, gerard butler and just hanging out with my children. i 'don't' enjoy physical activity, going out and/or socializing much, hence gaining weight more rapidly these past 2 years. i seem to have gotten myself into a rut that is leading nowhere and want to make some changes.

goals

• to lose weight
• to become more active
• to get fit and tone up
• to be more sociable

summary

turning 40 with no prospects for improvement in my life is the motivation i need to make some changes. feel free to stop in and say hi as these journeys are always better shared.

raine

[NewYorkGiants32]

Welcome!!

I have the same stats as you, trying hard to lose the weight as well....Good luck to you!

[ll__raine__ll]

hi Jennifer

thanx for stopping in.

well my first day back at low carbing is drawing to a close and i'm feeling pretty good about things. have eaten 4 smallish meals today, drank about 3 litres of water, done some aerobics, stretches and crunches and about to get dinner started.

now to keep this up for another 6 months.

[Moretta]

Sounds like you are on the right track.

Good luck on your journey.

[ll__raine__ll]

good morning Moretta

thank you for your good wishes.

well the bad news this morning is i couldn't pull myself out of bed early as planned and get some aerobic exercises in before breakfast.

the good news is yesterdays effort paid off and the scales were down 1.74 lbs!

breakfast this morning consisted of:
bacon
poached eggs
1/2 fried tomato
some fried onion
celery
coffee, and
water

according to fitday this one meal alone consisted of 11 carbs which is a bummer cuz it means i'm going to have to be really stingy re: carbs for the rest of the day.

i'm planning on making a chicken broth using left over roast chicken, onion, garlic, celery and soy sauce and having that for lunch. i know it's broth but i call it soup and eat it ... i love it!

i have a small hogget roast defrosting. i'm going to roast that in a bag, thicken the juice with butter and/or cream and have that with some greens for afternoon tea and i'll probably have a small dinner of leftover roast or soup.

i'd really like to be able to get 6 smaller meals in each day but considering i usually only get one meal in a day, and i'm now making a point to not eat after 6 pm ... i'm doing well to get 4 in.

[ll__raine__ll]

another day done.

i feel quite tired for some reason. i didn't end up doing any exercises at all today but did put in a few hours spring cleaning my home. (even though it's mid winter here)

i had 1332 calories today and 17 carbs. yesterday i had 1123 cals and 18 carbs. i'm really feeling those extra calories though and hope the scales don't reflect them in the morning. i usually weigh every day; first thing in the morning. it's not a good habit i know but i can't help it.

[ll__raine__ll]

saurday 26th july

i had a little sleep in this morning but when i did get up i did some aerobic exercises which i'm feeling good about. i don't ever do much at a time but figure anything is better than nothing.

also checked to see if i'm in ketosis yet and that showed i definitely, positively am. and the best news this morning is my weight is down: 2.86 lbs!

i know i shouldn't get so excited about these losses when i'm doing induction and that it's just water loss but i can't help it. i like knowing that what i'm doing is working but still need to be aware and prepared for the days when the scales don't move or stop moving; i'd really like to lose at least 5 kilos (11 lbs) within this first two weeks.

something else i did last night was some more crunches when i got into bed. it wasn't a lot but thought i'd note it here in case this info comes in handy down the line.

this morning i had a bowl of chicken and vege broth (love that stuff ) with some pickled pork in it for breakfast. today i intend to get 5 meals in and make them just a bit smaller than yesterdays portions.

otherwise, i don't have much on today. my son is at his dads for the weekend and my daughter is going to her part time job at mcdonalds so i'll be home alone. after yesterdays effort i have minimal housework to do and i need to go out and sign off on my flat that my tenant is vacating as well but then i'll have absolutely nothing to do ... might get in a few more aerobic exercises, crunches and stretches.

i'm feeling good today.

[ll__raine__ll]

another day of eating down

while today i did manage to get in five meals i didn't stick to what i'd planned in food. the result of this is my calories are right down despite adding an unplanned coffee with cream to bump the calories up. it was just that, after feeling like i've been eating all day long i just couldn't face eating anything substantial in either of my last two meals.

todays menu
breakfast - chicken and vegetable broth w/pickled pork
morning tea - chicken and vegetable broth
lunch - ground beef, bacon, parsely and onion burgers bind with egg (these were yum! )
afternoon tea - chicken and vegetable broth
dinner - chicken and vegetable broth

also - 3 - 4 litres water and 3 cups of coffee w/cream

total calories: 920 (oops)
total carbs: 16

looking at todays menu i might as well be on the soup diet and i really hope i haven't messed things up by not having enough calories for the day. that said i feel full; not stuffed like yesterday but definitely full and not hungry in the slightest.

also did some more aerobics today ... please let the scales reflect my efforts (in a good way) tomorrow ...

[ll__raine__ll]

start of day 4

well the scales didn't move this morning and i'm a bit stressed about that. i'm hoping i ate too little yesterday and/or the crunches i've been doing are building muscle already. i've little faith that it's the later so am going to work on getting more calories in today. i may also cut back to 4 meals per day instead of 5 for now. 5 would be a struggle to keep up anyway.

last night i dreamed that i was drinking and eating caramel and chocolate ... maybe my dream food has calories and carbs?

not losing also gives me an excuse to knock off the exercises ... i didn't do any when i got up this morning but after a big breakfast i'm feeling a bit guilty about that so will get some aerobics in some time today.

breakfast this morning was:

3 small ground beef, garlic, onion, bacon and parsley burgers bind with an egg
2 small fried eggs
1 medium stalk of celery
1 tbspn of mayo
1 coffee w/cream
1/2 a litre of water

there's 543 calories in that and 7 carbs and i'm feeling so full i could barf. the good news though is i haven't been craving more food than i'm getting and i'm especially not craving carbs. (touch wood) so for now and while i'm feeling this way ... i should be able to stick to induction without any cheating.

recap of carbs and calories:

day 1
calories - 1123
carbs - 18
fat - 72%
protein - 23 %
carbs - 5 %
weightloss - 1.74 lbs

day 2
calories - 1332
carbs - 17
fat - 58 %
protein - 37 %
carbs - 5 %
weightloss - 2.86 lbs

day 3
calories - 920
carbs - 16
fat - 61 %
protein - 32 %
carbs 7 %
weightloss - 0 lbs

looking at these stats all together the only difference that really stands out is the lesser amount of calories i ate yesterday. for some reason the carb percentage was up yesterday despite having less than the two previous days.

oh well - hope everyone else has had a good week.

[rdolldee]

I just turned 38 on Wednesday I got to my goal size but of course my twin sister came on from africa small as ever so I have a little more to lose not worrying but we are identical twin an I don't want to be considered the big twin even thou I am at goal.

[ll__raine__ll]

happy birthday rdoll

thank you for stopping in. i have 3 older sisters and they're all bigger than me, they've never really been fussed about their weight so i envy them that. little do they know they inspire me though as ... i recall once visiting them a while after my first stint of low carbing. i wasn't following any plan at the time and was over the whole 'losing weight' thing, i guess i was just cruising along back then.

but my sisters reaction when they saw me was amazing ... i knew i'd lost weight but forgotten how much. they thought i was really skinny and couldn't get over it! i remember thinking they were just being nice and also thinking i could probably stand to lose another 10 - 20 lbs.

i'd really like to be like that again and wear those clothes again ... it was only a few years ago. i wish i appreciated where i was at back then.

[ll__raine__ll]

day 4 over

i really struggled to get that 4th meal down, wasn't hungry and (again) felt like barfing trying to get it eaten. it wasn't that appetizing either so that didn't help.

i did manage to get my calories up to 1286 though. only 10 carbs today but i don't think that'll matter much.

meals today

breakfast - beef and bacon burgers, 1 fried egg, mayo and celery
lunch - chicken and vegetable broth
afternoon tea - fried pork chop, 2 fried eggs, celery, brocolli (yum)
dinner - roast lamb
beverarges - 2 cups of coffee w/cream, 4 litres of water

actually, that seems like a hell of a lot of food for only 12 hundred calories. perhaps i'm adding them wrong in fitday. *sigh*

i've had a rather boring day and still bummed about not losing any weight this morning. i'm not that hopeful about tomorrow morning either for some reason ... even though i'm doing everything by the book and not cheating.

i signed up a new tenant for my flat today, he's a painter and going to paint the flat for me in lieu of bond which is good. seems like a nice enough guy. my tenant who just left didn't clean though so i'll have to get onto that in the next week. i really should have taken the cleaning out of her bond but i'm too soft.

my son is due home from his dads any minute ... yay!
my daughter is working again ... least one of us does something constructive.

hope everyone else has had or having a great day.

[ll__raine__ll]

day 5

no movement on the scales this morning again. i'm rather puzzled as i usually do quite well on induction levels, especially when i've got so much weight to lose and i'm not cheating. in the past i've been able to lose even when i do cheat a little.

i hope my age and body hasn't given up on me and my metabolism hasn't decreased to zilch.

i'm going to try getting more carbs in today and getting my calories up even more. whether i lose or not i don't want my body to start getting dependent on too few carbs or calories or i figure it'll make it harder to lose when my weight does finally get down. (don't ask me how i come to that conclusion though)

i'm also still in ketosis. despite not losing and feeling pissed about that, all seems and feels well within me. i think i'll give the soup a rest today too ... maybe there's too much salt in it or something and i'm retaining water.

it's a dreary wet day here today and my daughter is home sick with a tummy bug. i was going to plan a party for my 40 th birthday coming up in about 8 weeks and figured a few lbs loss a week would see me in good shape for that and spring ... but i really needed a good kick start from induction first. so i'll see how things go over the next week before deciding whether to have that party or not.

[ll__raine__ll]

day 6

well i'm not very pleased to report that day 5 didn't end so well as far as low carbing goes. my daughter got over her tummy bug around mid afternoon yesterday and made some chocolate biscuits and i'm afraid the smell of them set off a mad carb craving for me ... and i caved

but i'm back on track this morning and set to carry on.

i've spent the better part of this morning at the ER because my son who is 8 (not sure why i wrote he is 6 in the top post) stuck a bit of pencil lead in his ear. god knows why he would do this at his age but the bottom line is they can't get it out and he has to wait until next week to see a specialist.

[ll__raine__ll]

end of day 6

well i've just had a nice steak and salad dinner. don't know if i'll bother weighing tomorrow morning, if i do i doubt there'll be anything to report so won't write the results in here. hopefully i'll be back in ketosis and just focus on sticking to plan instead of what the scales are doing.

having entered all my foods in fitday today ... for some reason i can't see what i had for breakfast this morning and can't for the life of me remember what i had. it hasn't been a long day ... perhaps i'm going senile or something. yay ... maybe i'll forget to eat for a few months.

[ll__raine__ll]

30th july 2008

well today is the start of day 7 of low carbing with one massive cheat during the week that sees my weight at 192.06 lbs

today i'm going to try and keep the carbs right down to a minimal and stick to meat and eggs with maybe a bit of celery and see if i can't get under 191 lbs by tomorrow. that's a fair bit off my short term goal but after the big cheat i did two days ago it's to be expected.

i don't know why i sabotaged myself this week considering up until it happened i wasn't even craving carbs or particularly hungry. i'll just have to remember how bad it's made me feel in the meantime and how i messed up a weeks worth of good work. i'll also need to remember that if i hadn't have caved i more than likely would have been a further pound or two down than i am now and possibly at goal.

so i'm going to re-set my short term goal and add another. i might make these next goals more realistic and achievable and start trying to focus on slow weight loss instead of fast. in the past i've always lost quite well and fast on induction and it's bummed me out this isn't happening this time around. now i'm just going to face the fact that my body has changed and how things worked before are a thing of the past.

i need to accept that this is going to be a long term thing and condition my body and self to low carbing forever. that's "low" carbing, not "no" carbs. i also need to be prepared and happy to lose a few lbs a week instead of a few lbs a day.

[ll__raine__ll]

day 8

well i think i've got some good news. still no movement on the scales this morning and despite all my blathering about this being ok and not focusing on the scales ... i still had niggling doubts about what i was doing wrong. from what i could tell, bar that one cheat (albeit it was a big one), i've been doing things strictly by the book. when i low carb by the book the pounds usually melt off me and when absolutely nothing happens i have to wonder if i'm ever going to lose weight this way again.

but this morning i realized that there is something i'm doing differently now from when i usually low carb. i've been taking musilax 3 times a day. i take musilax to keep 'regular' so i don't get blocked up. there are no ingredients listed on the pack but i figured surely there'd be nothing noteworthy to worry about in it.

but i googled the stuff this morning ... i still couldn't find any ingredients for it but i did find that it comes in regular and sugar-free. mine is regular which indicates it must have sugar in it. i also found a couple of links that says products like this sometimes contain aspartame and sucrose!

so i think i've found my archilles heel. needless to say this musilax sh*t is going in the bin and hopefully these scales of mine will get moving again!

[ll__raine__ll]

end of day 8

i've had dinner a bit late tonight as it's just before 7 but considering i have to go out and clean some more of my flat before the new tenant moves in it should be ok.

i've also not gotten many calories in today either, under 900 actually but oh well ... i'm not hungry and i'll make sure to try and eat a good deal more tomorrow.

[Bobby]

Good job for a first week even with the oops on day five. The main thing is you owned it and got back in line where you need to be. On day five it looked like you didn't have allot of fat in the morning did you? It may be why you craved the biscuits so much? Something to think about.

Again, congrats on a great start and really good journal.

[Meekness29]

Hi Raine!

I just realized you had a journal. Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us all Hang in there and keep up the good work!

Meekness

[ll__raine__ll]

good morning Bobby and Meek

thanks for stopping in.

bobby you might be right about day 5. in fact for most of the week my calories have been on the lowish side so i'm really going to have to make a concerted effort to get them up.

i've had bacon, sausage, an egg and salad for breakfast. have chicken wings planned for lunch and must get to the supermarket today to get some more meat. i've had no cheese the last few days but might add a bit of that back into my meals. still been drinking heaps of water.

will keep chugging along.

[ll__raine__ll]

day 9 ends

well todays menu was:

breakfast
1 sausage
1 peice of bacon
1 fried egg
small lettuce salad
coffee w/cream
water, water, water

lunch
baked chicken wings
cheese and bacon omelette
cucumber and celery salad
coffee
water, water, water

dinner
1 peice of bacon
1 fried egg
coffee
water, water, water

all up i had a total of 1700 calories today and 14 carbs. hopefully boosting my calories will be just what the dr ordered.

ciao!

[Meekness29]

Hi Raine,

You menu looks awesome. Also, good job on eating more cals. Your numbers look perfect too! Have you ever used Fit Day? It's a great too to track your cals/fat/pro/carbs. You should try it!

Keep up the good work

[ll__raine__ll]

good morning Meek

yep i plug all my foods into fitday religiously after every meal. it's become part of my routine when i sit down here with my coffee after eating. and you're right, it is a great way to keep a track of everything and it also helps me plan what and how much i should have for my remaining two meals after breakfast.

i haven't changed it on my stats yet but the