Heather Shrinks in Houston!

[bjw]

Hey Heather,
Did you ever get your banking issues fixed?
I was thinking about you and wondering why anyone would be ugly to you. It boggles my mind how many sick folks are in this world.
Take care,
Jean

[Houston Heather]

I don't know. I think they are just frustrated. We're having a dialogue, I guess. I like to think I am very honest in examining my flaws. I would hate for God to show me I was a real butt after I died.

Yeah, the bank gave me back my $10.43. I have yet to order a new debit card... the little allergy/hives thing got in the way!

I smoked up some ribs. You can see the end result here: Heather knits, the junk food queen

I would put up just a link to the video but I don't know how. Anyway, it's fun.

My pork roast is still smoking right now; you can see what happened to the ribs!

I'm not really hungry - chicken fried overload, but I need to eat so I can take my pills. I went up on the lithium today and intend to stay up on it as needed.

Thank God I can still take the LITHIUM. I don't miss the antidepressant at all, and Ron keeps raving about how wonderful I sound. I can think for a change.

[Houston Heather]

Whoooooo... I feel wierd!

I think I'm going to bed early. I ought to be fine once I get some rest.

[skeopple]

Her doctor and I tried to reduce my moms' Lexapro and she took half her dosage for 2 weeks and didn't like "feeling everything". (I really don't think she's grieved my dad's death 6 years ago. That's when she went on this stuff.) So she's back on her full dose.

I'm glad you were able to get off it.

Lord, give dear Heather a peaceful, restful night's sleep. She is a well-deserving servant of yours. But you already know that. Speed her current skin reaction and allow her to enjoy the life you've given her. In your son's name, Amen.

[Snowman]

Heather!!! Know that I'm thinking of you and praying for you and Ron.

I hope you have a good nights rest, wake up feeling better than today!!

[Houston Heather]

I slept pretty well, considering.

I usually layer up, lots of sheets and blankets, even in the summer, but heat and sweating are awful, so it's just me and a thin sheet now.

Sharon, that's the thing I hated the most about medication - it's like my brain was injected with anesthesia. I couldn't think. I was walking around stupid. Even Ron called me "stony" because I was "acting stoned". Now I can think, and the lithium is doing all the work on managing the moods, that's apparent.

I haven't had any significant symptoms since I cut out the Lexapro. I felt really hung-over about 5 days after I stopped, one day of just a nasty headache, very sweaty and groggy. The normal adult dose is 10 mg.

I had a bad reaction a few years back, so I was taking 5 mg. Then last year I was getting very jittery, so on my own, I cut it back to 2.5. The nice thing about the FAS, I seem to be able to get away with very small doses.

The bad thing, (as my family keeps saying) is, that "Heather, you have a very sensitive system". AGH. I don'[t want to be sensitive.

I don't want to have oily skin, either. But I do.

I feel a little jumpy right now, too much tea. I may need to take some benadryl. I'm fairly itchy. I'd like to get off everything, no benadryl, no steroids, nothing other than my lithium and risperdal, but my body has other plans.

I've eaten on plan today, I'm happy about that.

It's just going to take a while. Hopefully I'll be better by my birthday (Sept 22). What-with the hurricanes we seem to get most Septembers, Ron getting sick last year, and all, I am ready for a nice, relaxing birthday.

It's just mindblowing that a little speck of medication, can cause such a severe reaction, leaving me covered in hives weeks later. It's just mindblowing.

I will heal, no permanent damage (perhaps a scar on the back of a leg). I did some research and I came pretty close to something called "Toxic Epidermal Necrylosis" - where the skin dies and falls off. I had a few small black spots on the backs of my thighs (I think where tiny areas of skin died!), that are slowly healing.

It makes me realize this could have been far worse.

Today, I'm too tired to whine about "having" to stay home on my day off. I'm just glad I'm getting better.

Somewhere in here, I do plan to cut back on my diet soda intake.

[Houston Heather]

I don't believe it, this has been the WORST MONTH.

KITCHEN ACCIDENT - BLOOD EVERYWHERE. DON'T NEED HOSPITAL thank god but got a finger dripping blood as i type hurts like a ---- too

next month will be awesome.
i insist

[Houston Heather]

Ron actually yelled at me for laughing at TV.

My response - as I shut his door. I gotta laugh.

I am going to make it look easy.

Lost the skin on a fingertip - looks bad but OK. No worse than what I did in the garden a couple weeks ago - which finally healed.

Showering will really suck but I won't sit around feeling sorry fir mysekf.

HA hardly notice the hives

[Snowman]

Heather!!!!

When I was about 14 or so and came home from school, my DM asked me to peel potatoes. Somehow, I sliced the tip of my thumb!! It didn't come off, but was flapping!!

I hope you have a wonderful nights sleep and wake up feeling refreshed!!!

You keep right on laughing, laughter is the best medicine!!!

[Houston Heather]

hurt last night but tylenol helped.

hives a lot better.

Yup, gotta laugh.

All this is temporary.

[skeopple]

I'm glad you didn't need to go to E.R., Heather. Finger cuts can bleed a lot! I actually cut the end OFF of my left hand pointer finger when I was 18. Machine at work. Around midnight. They had to graft skin from my thigh to stitch 'er up. Looks weird still. Then a couple years later, cutting cabbage, cut it open again! Yes, fingers bleed lots.

Looks like you're on the road to recovery from your toxic reaction to Lexapro. Happy healing. Praying for no hurricane on your birthday. We have awhile to work on that

[Houston Heather]

You would not believe the freaking drama involved in getting our milk this week.

Supposed to leave work at 10:30, we had to cancel our ride (scream) and wait another hour at work, then wait on our new ride.

Not very itchy until 10 mins ago, took some stuff. Finger hurts a lot but looks OK. No DR needed.

I got on the scale. 172. Not bad considering.

Gotta get up at 3 tomorrow for a delivery. I actually told Ron he didn't have to pay me. I still have money, he'll get me Monday. Rest and sleep planned after I fill 'em up 2morrow.

Also a shark vs Octopus movie on sci-fi.

[skeopple]

Just wondering why you're still itching if it was due to Lexapro? Is it possible the cause is something else too? I was hoping you were totally healing since you took away the probable cause.

Aren't vendors great? Too bad they don't call you to tell you they'll be late at least.

[Houston Heather]

A drug allergy rash can take months to heal. I'm lucky my skin didn't fall off - seriously.

No Mountain Dew on today's delivery, but the Voodoo chips were so good Ron asked me to bring some home. I can't eat 'em. thank God.

Kind of queasy - tired of being sick.

[Houston Heather]

I ate some wheat - hives got mad. Interesting.

My finger's getting better, but I'm not in a rush to type on it just yet. I need a Heather to clean up, cook my food, etc, but I'm stuck with just me.

UGH, where to start? Dishes? clean out fridge? Mop floor? Water backyard? Mow yard? Check on plant babies under flourescent light? I am messy and the house is EXTREME. Ugh.

I guess this is why I only got as sick as I did, it kind if reminds me of the book of Job where God says "You can damage (her) body but only so far.." and the devil goes as nuts as he's allowed. Any worse, we (both me and Ron) would have been very screwed. Really, any worse I could have ended up in hospital, stopped breathing, been unable to work...

The more time passes, the more I realize, I could have DIED,

ACK. God's not ready for me yet! At least I won't snivel as much when I call Dad.

No impulsive posting with my hand like this too. I have to think everything out before typing.

[Houston Heather]

A cautionary tale.

The other vendor has 2 employees, Mike - his brother and "Gary". Gary is a married father of 5.

Hot Legs can't afford a health plan, but Gary's wife has coverage for her and the kids. Hot Legs (the other vendor ) suggested Gary look into getting a policy.

No, said Gary, he didn't need it.

One of his hobbies - horses. He decided to play bronco buster.

The bronco busted him. Broken leg needs sugery. In our line of work, unless your name is Ron B, you need to be able to walk, lift and carry things. In short, you need your legs.

No health insurance. No disability insurance either.

Not smart, Gary.

[bjw]

Heather,
So sorry things are not good for you right now.
I read a lot of your Heather knits blog and really enjoyed the videos of Ron protecting his food LOL!
How is the buisness doing these days? Is the recession affecting your sales?
HAGN,
Jean

[skeopple]

Running by and dropping in to say, "Hi, and all the best to you."

[Houston Heather]

He's a cutie, he's a really picky eater. Last year he was so miserable, any protein food tasted revolting. He still can't really do poultry but at least he can enjoy his pork ribs!

Sales are pretty bad, but we can live pretty cheaply - about to go to Foodtown.

I put on my steroid cream. It burns and tingles for about an hour before it settles down. Feel the burn...agh.

I will do some cleanup today, some cooking, but plan to rest a lot too. I need it.

I told Ron I need to work Sunday, I didn't get to finish snacks. We'll go in for a little bit.

Tuesday AM we go see his neurologist about a refill.

[Houston Heather]

Yuck. Dead squirrel in my garden.

I was already queasy... now I have to get rid of that.

Some people here (in Houston) can be racist pigs. If anyone deserves censure, it's not the Latinos.

At Foodtown. I'm getting Ron comfy on the bench. A laborer-looking guy, is leaving with his child. He's hispanic.

He only has one bag of groceries, and is obviously poor. He looks at me helping my husband - Ron is obvoiusly blind and has mobility issues.

"Juan" comes over, and says "Please" as he holds out what is probably his last dollar. "No, thank you!" I take out a $20 and show Juan. "It's OK, thank you! God Bless you!" He tries to offer me the $ again and I say no thanks.

[snort] And to hear SOME talk, nothing good comes north of the border. Juan could teach a lot of "Native citizens" about charity. He was a real man, and I'm asking God to bless him.

Ron has that problem occasionally, a nice spanish speaker will press money into his hand on occasion when he's alone... then disappear.

Just goes to show, a lot of WONDERFUL folk out there. It really made my day.

Worth the trouble to type out.

[skeopple]

Glad to hear the good in people. Too often, we only hear bad. We don't watch the t.v. news much anymore.

Glad you have another 'friend' to pray for.

[Houston Heather]

I think it goes more to are they ignorant selfish people? Or are they compassionate Christians.

I have lived in the ghetto - it would have been easy to say everyone with dark skin was a drug dealer, user, thug, "woman for sale", or all of it. I also lived near a 20 year old woman who took in her sisters 4 kids after sister died "I was in foster care, I'm not doing that to them!" and struggled to raise them. Most of the people I knew would have run like hell.

It really goes to the individual. Some will be awesome Christians who make me examine my own values, and others you just thank God you only meet them in passing!

[bjw]

Thanks for the insight. I am gonna work on it.
Love,
Jean

[Houston Heather]

I've got yummy cheddarburgers and pork ribs smoking.

I am queasy, been queasy all day. Finally said I might as well cook.

I'll be fine when I eat, but until then... QUEASY. Ugh. Better than hives.

[Houston Heather]

Cheddarburgers are yummy. Nausea better now.

The ribs got up to temp so I sauced them. Now letting the sauce cook in a bit. I'm not a big rib fan but Ron loves them.

He feels very loved when I BBQ for him - it's very cute. I had fun.

[Houston Heather]

Running a little depressed today.

Not missing my Lexapro. It's actually better than my old depressions.

Gonna be fine when the lithium kicks in.

[karenb]

My friend was on vacation once in Wa or Oregan once, she was in a wheelchair with a broken foot and was bundled up because they didn't expect it to be so cool. She was drinking hot chocolate and waiting at a corner while her DH got the car our of underground parking when somedroped a handfull of change in her cup! Then another woman gave her a dollar. MY friend tried to explain but the woman just said no, no we all need help sometime.

[Houston Heather]

Yeah.

I have to say, almost everyone I meet is awesome.

Well. I tackled the dishes. Pretty obvious I'm the only one who does them. I think I destroyed a civilization living on one dish.

Ugh... that's the bad thing about getting better -playing catch up and still keeping up with daily chores too. Like laundry. You don't want to see my floors, either. I'll do them tomorrow.

I think that's why God has never let me get REALLY sick since 1993 - He knows Ron needs me. I was thinking, the last time I got really sick was the salmonella 5 years ago. And I was better in about a week, this is the sickest I've been ever.

And considering, that's not bad. My sister and her daughter have to see an immune specialist every few months - she has an immune deficiency and a simple cold can really flatten her for weeks. If you have ever donated blood or plasma, she probably got some.

I figure I'll be good to donate blood in a few more weeks. My finger ought to be typeable by Wednesday at the worst.

I still need to get a new debit card too.

Plans:
Work and get paid tomorrow
Go to sporting goods store and buy disaster kit supplies for family kits. If I don't make a kit, they won't have one. So I will make them earthquake country disaster kits and mail them. Then I won't worry. I plan to make a house kit and a car kit, especially for my sister in sales who is always driving.
Walmart, and get supplies for kits.
Mail kits.
Tend garden
Mow and edge garden beds
Laundry, dishes, cooking
Work
Get better
Avoid sun while having a day out if possible.
Get debit card
Sign up for monthly delivery of romance novels - I have really enjoyed my stash as I've gotten better.
Take Ron to neurologist on Tuesday.

Lots to do! I'm glad I am getting better so I can think about all this.

Time to go water, hope it is quiet and no dead thing in my garden it was awful.

I did tell Ron, that's the only time I wish you could see. It WOULD be nice to say "Get rid of it" and he could.

[skeopple]

G'night, Heather. Sad day here. If you have time, click link to my journal for info.

Hugs.

[Houston Heather]

I'll be praying for his widow.

UGH. Got up at 3. Got picked up before 4. We go to a nearby subdivision. We wait and wait - it's past the pickup time. I remark sadly on the 2 cars in the driveway - can't or won't they give the "client" a ride? Pickup is 4:07. They don't come out until 4:15.

It's a blind mother, I can tell by her bag she also uses dialysis so she went blind and killed her kidneys from diabetes. Her boy is about 8. And people wonder about my paratransit stories!

Anyway, she comes out 10 minutes late. "I didn't think you'd REALLY be here at 4."

I wanted to say something so bad. "No. They just tell you to be ready at 3:45 - LIKE WE WERE - so they can make you get up early!" Then she wanted to know where we were going and shut up right quick when I said "Work. We have a delivery coming at 5." I am not cheerful first thing. I would love to say that I am but I'd be lying.

Not only that, I slept like crap and had a hallucination because I thought I could stop the anti-psychotic too. Big mistake. AGGGH. Battled some depression too.

= Heather not happy. I was terse, that's the best I could do. Let her think it was because she was late - which was a factor.

Anyway, we get to work. "Gary" normally goes in at 5 AM to get the soda delivery. He can't, so Hot Legs and wife show up. I tease him about angering God, now he has to see me twice in a week. He chuckles.

He notices I am a little depressed so he tells me FILTHY jokes until I laugh. He's a good guy. I like him.

I put up 2 pallets of stuff and work my butt off. I also got paid. Considering, business was good.

Ron decided to introduce a new pastry. We'll see how it does. I was even a little tempted until I read the carb count, then I dropped it like it bit me!

We went to the bank, I got paid. Then we went to Starbucks. I checked out the sporting goods store. What a rip. They even had $160 disaster kits that were tiny. I passed it up.

I will assemble the components separately, I guess. Then I had time for the pet store. NO ONE WARNED ME! They have cats for adoption - including precious black kittens. I LOVE black cats. They also had a dilute calico female siamese. She was so haughty, but came over and said Meow like a princess.

I got a fluffy cat toy, played with them all, and called Ron. We agreed Bubba would never, ever forgive us. Then I bought him the toy, which he loves.

Then home and bed. For some reason I'm really warm right now. Whew.