Heather Shrinks in Houston!

[bjw]

Glad to see you posting Heather.
Did your doctor give you any guide lines for checking back in with him? I would have thought this many days of prednisone would have made a remarkable difference.
Please don't suffer needlessly and call the doc back if you need to.
Love ya,
Jean

[skeopple]

Are you getting all "buff" now (with the steroids)?

We'll be gone most of tomorrow. Following the Harley riders on the Toys for Tots run. In the next county. Our son and his wife are riding, so we'll follow with the 3 grandbabies. Hope the weather is nice. Hope my back can take the car ride. I'll bring my ice bag with.

You have a restful Saturday, Heather. What is tax free weekend?

[Houston Heather]

No sales tax on clothing items under $100, shoes under 100, or school supplies. It is wild.

I'm doing better, but I still have a lot of healing ahead! The backs of my thighs were completely inflammed, purple and deep red. Now they're more of a pinkish-normal color.

Ron has psoriasis, and he occasionally breaks out in nasty rashes. After his accident, they had him in a cervical collar for about 2 weeks, until he was completely cleared. When they took off the collar he had a TERRIBLE rash - worse than what I had. It took a couple weeks to heal. I only got treatment on Tuesday, so I expect it will take at least another week before I'm 100%.

I'm still incredibly tired, the benadryl doesn't help with the fatigue but it helps with the itching... in the meantime my mood is fine. I had a horrible reaction to Compazine 12 years ago, so bad I was up for a month, straight, could barely sleep for 20 minutes at a time. It was ghastly.

Compared to that, this is a relative cakewalk.

[skeopple]

[Houston Heather]

Bubba wants you all to know he's taking GOOD care of his Mommy. He brought me a lovely grasshopper through the cat door just now.

[KutiePie]

Is there any chance at all you were exposed to somebody with chickenpox? I swear the picture of your leg looked exactly like when my kids had chickenpox years ago!

[Houston Heather]

No, I had that when I was 3. I started out with itchy raised bumps on my legs, which spread to my arms, then feet and hands and a little on my waist where I wear my cell phone and fanny pack. All over the course of a week.

Chickenpox starts on the torso, then spreads to extremities. I ride public transit, God only knows what I'm exposed to, but my regular doc and my psychiatrist are convinced this is an allergic reaction.

I never really had a fever, sore throat, or any of that... if anything I have chills.

Sorry to whine, I just feel like crap and it's been almost 2 weeks. Even Mono wasn't this bad.

We got up early and went to Foodtown. Ron planned the trip to be one hour, but after a half hour some guy comes in and starts putting the hustle on Ron "I'm here to pick you up, let's go, you called a cab."

Ron said no he didn't. Metrolift called him and told him they contracted a cab, they were paying the guy to pick us up. I was still checking out.

I had brought several large tote bags to put my groceries into, but the guy was in a big rush, so he said. I'm standing outside in the hot sun with the groceries and he's on the cell phone in the cab, I had to bang on the door because he locked himself and Ron in there, and say "Hey, can you open the trunk?" He says yeah, talks for another couple minutes, then comes out and opens a door for me, and I point at the groceries. "The trunk?" Oh, yeah. He goes back into the cab, shuts the door, back on the cell phone, and comes out a minute or two later with keys. Then he plays "Key surprise" until he finds the right one.

I gave him the pastry I had bought for "our driver" and he acted like it was a dead rodent. I had to say, I bought this, for you to eat, before he would take it.

He gets an attitude about the bags. I told him, you came early, if you had come when Metrolift asked you I would have had everything rebagged and easier. He put a big rush job on me and did the whole "I'm so burdened" thing.

I was really fed up by now. When we get home he parks in the street, not in the driveway. Then gets more attitude and tells me to "Go get your cart". I said, I don't have a cart. I'll carry them to the house. If he had pulled into the driveway, like we asked, no big deal.

More dramatics. I go in the house. Even my bra is irritating me. I take it off. I start putting up the groceries. I am incredibly tired from the benadryl and still itchy.

He bangs on the door. "You owe me money" I said, we didn't call you, Metrolift did. If you look in your computer it says "See so-and-so for voucher." If you want to make a big deal over this we will call Metrolift and they can explain it to you. He finally leaves.

Ugh. What a jerk. I almost wish I WERE contagious.

[karenb]

Could you have shingles? I remember when my dad had them but it's been so long ago I don't remember what they looked like. I know now they have anti-viral meds you can take.

[Houston Heather]

Not shingles either. That's different too... remember 2 doctors said ALLERGIC REACTION to Lexapro. Shingles involves the torso, and my torso is pretty unaffected except for some pressure point hives.

I got a nap but slept too long, woke up ferociously itchy. The backs of my thighs look better, I just have to be patient. They've gone from a deep angry purple to a light pink in the last few days. The Merck Manual for Home Use says that a bad drug reaction rash can last for months. Mine, hopefully only another week or so. It IS getting better. If it weren't I'd go back to the doc.

My calves, tops of thighs, and hands (location of the newest hives, that were popping up Tuesday and Wednesday) are the most uncomfortable now. The thigh-backs are fine, just tender and very dry skin. I'm trying to stay positive, focus on fun things, stay out of the sun and heat! Ron and I are going to Starbucks soon.

I can see I'll need to be taking a lot of Benadryl YET though. This is probably the sickest I have ever been in my life. I'm very fortunate, albeit VERY uncomfortable.

Work is quiet enough that I'm not needed much, and I can handle the jobs I have to do. Hard to believe this all came from a 2.5 mg tablet.

I'll recover, Ron is still suffering the effects of HIS bad drug reaction last year.

I had picked up dozens of the Christian Romance novels I like, and I've been reading 1-2 a day. They cheer me up and make me feel better. I'm glad I had them "for an emergency".

Last night my garden got almost an inch of rain. I stayed on the porch until the blowing rain made my hives mad, then I came in. It was lovely.

[Jennifer]

Hope you feel better Heather

I love reading your journal & I've learned so much from your positive attitude...thank you!

Be sure to post when you're going to be at the farmer's market & I'll try to come see you. It's the one on Richmond between Greenway Plaza and downtown right? I've been wanting to check it out but can never seem to get my butt moving on Saturdays

[Houston Heather]

Yeah! It's at Richmond and Eastside, the one Urban Harvest does. Probably 2 weeks, I think. I have some nice little transplants coming along.

I did get some of my older ones mixed up when I was sick, so I'm keeping those. I'll find out what they are in a few months.

They have fantastic farm eggs for $4 a dozen for large eggs, and you get to see the living conditions - they have albums for you. You can tell the poultry guys are very fond of their "girls". I really WANT to buy humanely raised eggs, I have a heart of butter when it comes to animals. I was even a vegan for a while in JR High.

I would have liked to go today but that was out! I was lucky to get to Foodtown! But, I am getting better and won't I appreciate my health when I do?

Ron and I have a hot date at Starbucks - I plan to bring the stevia I bought today (at Foodtown!) and put that in my drink. Sometimes the Baristas mix up the hazelnut and SF vanilla syrups. I don't want any surprises!

Tonight will probably be some soup and pumpkin pudding for dessert. I am finding it very easy to stay positive thanks to my lithium. I really owe it an apology, all this time, 3 years, I thought the lithium was making me so groggy, and it was the Lexapro.

I'm gonna make it!

[Houston Heather]

I spoke to a family member earlier... worried that I stopped my "medication".

I guess I expect too much. I expect that people understand:
Heather took 3 medications.
Each medication handled a different area
Heather does not get severe depressions anymore.
Heather was taking a very minimal dose of antidepressant
Heather is now violently ALLERGIC to at least one antidepressant.
Taking another antidepressant could KILL Heather.
Both Heather AND DOCTOR feel that Heather is OK without anti-d.
Heather will be her normal self, as long as she continues to take her lithium.
Heather will die before she stops her lithium.
Heather has no desire to go off the deep end again.
Heather likes being sane.
Heather is not stupid.
No, Heather does not "need" to "take something else" to replace what she "stopped".
People on proper doses of lithium are at a very low risk of suicide.
Heather is at a proper dose of lithium.

This rash is as bad as a suicidal depression, and will probably last longer than one. The choice is obvious to me.

BUT TELL THEM THAT. ALL THEY HEAR IS "HEATHER'S OFF HER PILLS".

aggggggggh

[Houston Heather]

Starting to feel a little - unusually irritable. Time to up the lithium.

Like I told Dad when I wasn't () whining, thank God the lithium is OK.

[Houston Heather]

As I applied my cream tonight, I realized I am getting better... it's just taking SO LONG.

But I WILL heal.

[Houston Heather]

Ron's talking to an old girlfreind from 30 years ago. She found us on Facebook.

It seems like every other sentence is "Heather says" or "Heather..."

Very cute. I don't think I need to worry about him.

Besides, I always say if he's dumb enough to leave she can have him.

[Houston Heather]

I woke up feeling crappy again... I am healing, but it's taking a long time. Ron wants to know "how long will it take?" How do I know? I told him, probably another week or two.

Ron wanted to go to Walmart, so we went. I did find 2 packets of veggie seeds. Other than that, Walmart does not carry the good milk thistle anymore. Don't waste your money on what they sell. They didn't even have the toothpaste I wanted.

Ron was talking a lot about his old girlfriend. Kept "reassuring" me he "wasn't going to do anything". I told him, I wasn't worried. I'm not. Besides, God will deal with him.

Then it was "Gee, wouldn't it be fun if we could..." it involved breaking at least a couple of commandments. I said no. It wouldn't be fun. It would be a terrible idea and probably destroy "us". He implied I "wasn't any fun" and was "boring". I said, well, you knew I was "boring" when you married me and you seemed pretty happy with it. Then he said "Oh, it's just a fantasy".

I told him, how would you feel if I were always "fantasising" about how great it would be to be with a guy who could see? And always told you about it? Would you like it? Would it make you feel special and loved? Or would it hurt your feelings and make you wonder why I ever bothered to marry someone who coudln't see to begin with? Hopefully he got it. It seemed to make an impact, but due to the head injury I will probably need to remind him several MORE times.

Then it was back to the old g/f and how unimportant she is. I asked him, if she is so unimportant how come every word for the last 10 minutes is regarding her? I am tired of hearing about her already. Oh, I didn't need to worry, he wouldn't DO anything. I thought we already covered this.

I haven't slept the night through in almost 2 weeks. I am constant discomfort. I have no appetite. The benadryl makes me groggy and thirsty. I'm tired. I never feel "good" or even "OK" it's always some flavor of lousy. And why? Because I am trying to be a pleasant, lovable, person and minimize the fallout from my mood disorder. In trying to make things easier for HIM and everyone else (hard to have fun with someone who's suicidal), I ended up being badly hurt.

Ron has decided I am "mean" and is hiding in his room. I thought "we" were more mature.

I'm going back to bed... until my every-four-hours itch attack wakes me up and I have to take more benadryl.

[Houston Heather]

Not much appetite since I started on the steroids, but I was craving salt so I fixed myself a sausage patty, cut up cheese, and some celery. Then I ate it while sipping splenda-sweetened iced tea as I read in bed. I really have to work at spoiling myself.

Benadryl time... the welts are angry. I'll take a new photo today and you can compare if you want. I'd never just stick the photo up, my legs aren't pretty. I wouldn't want to see them on someone else, so I won't do that to you!

Ugggghg. I'm gonna get better, I'll be fine, complete recovery. No lasting damage - perhaps maybe a scar or two on the back of my left thigh, but nothing serious. I have to keep reminding myself.

I feel incredibly whiny. Not cranky, just whiny. When I eat again, I'll take a lithium 150 too. It can only help. I don't want to cycle in the middle of all this. AGH.

I really miss sleeping through the night. I truly miss enjoying my time in the shower and taking a long bath. Bathing is very irritating and uncomfortable now.

[*Pear*]

Oh Heather, I'm so sorry you are having such a rough time with the drug reaction. I'll be praying for you.

Oh, and the PF Losers are missing you. Stop in and say hi.

[Houston Heather]

New rash photos. Ouch. Scroll down, top ones are garden and afghan.

Picasa Web Albums - Heather - August 2009

And you thought YOU had it bad!

It'll take more than this, to get ME down.

[bjw]

It does look some better Heather. I just can't imagine the agony you have endured. Itching is the worst! I had an itching problem maybe from blood pressure meds last year. I would scratch till I was bloody for several months. Prednisone did no good. I never did find out what the culprit was and one day it just stopped.
Hagn,
Jean

[Houston Heather]

I still get a few new hives every day, but far less than before. I figure I'm just toxic from the stuff stored in my fat.

Apparently this kind of reaction can be fairly common with some meds. I tell you, if I weren't bipolar I'd never take prescriptions. I am so paranoid about medication now... I will only take my lithium, anti-psychotic, and vitamins. Oh, and my benadryl.

Ron and I do have some fun planned tomorrow after work, he wants eggrolls from Walmart, and we're going to Burger King. I love me a good juicy bunless flamebroiled burger, and God knows I can use the protein!

[skeopple]

Hello Heather. We've been gone most of the weekend. Just checking in to see how you are doing. Those hives look soooo irritating. I'm glad you're making your way through all of this. And healing.
Ron needs to (and probably does, most of the time) realize what he has in you. That'd hurt me if DH talked that way. You must've given it to God; since I don't think you mentioned pummeting Ron!
Take care, friend.

[AngelzWingz]

Sorry to hear you are having such problems. I hope you continue to get better. I know what you mean about being able to sleep through the night and enjoy a good shower. I told my husband I think I would sell my soul to the devil for a nice long hot shower. Don't think it would be too good on the casts though and since they cost me $550 I'm not about to do anything to mess them up. Hang in there! Angel

[Houston Heather]

Sad, Sharon, it took me a couple minutes to figure out what you were referring to. Ron's crankiness this morning? The way he bit my head off? OH, no, something he said yesterday.

Unfortunately, riding the paratransit service you are often at the mercy of the driver. Today I could hear the dispatch radio blaring as the driver pulled up. I went outside and he opened the door. It was extremely loud. I could hear each WORD spoken INSIDE MY HOME with the DOOR SHUT. I asked him to turn the radio down.

"I can't do that, I have to hear the radio".
"Then SHUT THE DOOR SO YOU DON'T WAKE UP MY NEIGHBORS!"
"WHAT?"
Ron came out eventually, I had told him he needed to get this issue addressed - he was already pretty irritable (I assume he slept poorly).

It ended with Ron stomping and cursing up the driveway, and the driver leaving. We are waiting for another ride.

We've had this problem several times now, the driver wants the radio up at an extreme volume. I suspect that some of the drivers have some kind of hearing damage - they are the young kids you would see with the loud BOOM BOOM cars. The driver needs you to shout the instructions at them, and has to have the volume on the dispatch radio VERY LOUD in order to hear the dispatcher.

In my mind, they are unfit to drive. How can you get directions? Many people with developmental disabilties, autism, and brain damage can't handle very loud volume. It upsets them.

But ask the driver to turn it down, and they get an attitude and say "Well, suck it up, because I'm not turning it down."

[skeopple]

Ya, I was referring to the idea of the X gf. Nasty. Did R forget he's married? Sorry, I'm just a b---- when it comes to that stuff.

Have a wonderful Monday, Heather. How's your weather now? Any relief from that heat and humidity?

[Houston Heather]

Still pretty hot and humid, but not as sunny. We only got an hour at work, and that was more than we needed. On the one hand, I feel bad that things are slow, but on the other, I'm not really up for much!

Ron called in a formal complaint on the driver this morning - I could literally hear every word on the radio, in my kitchen, with the front door closed. That's WAY too loud.

We ended up riding with an old lady and her fresh-out-of jail caregiver. The caregiver had prison tattoos on her neck and hands, and was dressed like a man with the whole "Pants falling off over the boxers" look. Caregiver had a big attitude and called me a "Nosy B" because I said the driver had to keep the schedule he's given. At times, I really hate the paratransit service.

No wonder some of the people who ride are so bitter - I was NEVER able to drive myself around, and I hate being dependent on careless drivers and unpleasant "companions". I can't imagine being able to drive myself around, and then now I'm stuck riding paratransit.

Some of the cabs are so filthy I wonder if I'll ever wear shorts again - God only knows what I could pick up riding in those vehicles! Ugh.

Anyway, enough complaining - I'm just tired of being sick and tired... covered in hives and forced to take benadryl every 4 hours. I'm tired of being thirsty and itchy. I'm tired of waking up because the hives are mad, tired of avoiding all the fun things I want to do because being outside makes them mad, too.

Tired of riding around with unpleasant, nasty, people on the paratransit service. I am very grateful for the things God has given me, but sometimes I wish my load were lighter!

[Houston Heather]

Some hater left an anonymous message on my other blog. I would have taken it a lot more seriously if they had signed their name! Real easy to use profanity and all that when you're "Anonymous".

Ugh... didn't sleep great, but slept OK. Woke up itchy and headachy. Scared to take anything for the headache! I did manage to go 8 hours between benadryl doses, so I am healing. It'll just be another week or two.

It's hard not to focus on all the "fun" I can't have.

[skeopple]

Ignore the blogger if they can't be nice. Some people!! Knowing you, you are probably praying for them.........he he Love ya Heather!

Hope and pray for your speedier healing.

[Houston Heather]

Yeah, they're on the prayer list.

Aggggh. I need to get better about my eating. I'm getting sloppy! Really thirsty today.

Ron is marveling at the "receipt" he got from the bank, for making a coin deposit. It's a long strip of perforated plastic with numbers on it. Oh-kay.

It's hot and sunny and my pork roast needs to be cooked. Off I go to fire up the coals.

[Houston Heather]

I felt a little moody so I had a lithium 150 with my lunch. The evil chicken fried lunch.

AGH. It is so hard to get back on track, once I slip.

I am waiting on the coals right now. I feel like my mood is OK considering.

I think a degree of crankiness is normal and expected considering.