Heather Shrinks in Houston!

[Tazcat]

Great news on Bubba - very glad to read it! I may order some of those treats too

I made a very hard decision today. In spite of the fact that Lucky is available and I could qualify to be his "mom'/ home...

Now is just not the right time. There are too many other factors. My health is not great, Kiki and Indy just got settled, the place I'm in is too small.



Still, very hard to walk away and say no.

I really should go to bed - I have a doc's appt in the morning.(girl doc AGAIN - 2nd opinion )

Indy is racing around chasing sparkly balls and says HI HEATHER AND RON!



Take care.

[Zer]

How does R cope with the smell of cat treats? I know he is sensitive to some smells, as when you cook up all your meats. Some of your cat treats sound as if they might be a real challenge for someone who reacts strongly to smells.

[Houston Heather]

He finds the smell of human food vastly depressing. It smells good, too good, and he can't eat it. Cat treats smell vile but not edible, so he's fine with them. By the way, Zer, Ron's doctor loved your idea for the shin guards and told him to keep it up.

Today is the 6 year anniversary of the accident. Already tough just there, I wish I could forget all the bad parts. The way his family gave up on him after one look, fighting to care for him, the name calling and slander, people telling me it was my fault... terrible.

Seeing him back in the wheelchair - not fun either! We went to Walmart and they left us there for 2 hours. Poor Ron was miserable. We went home and took a quick nap.

Then, up and at 'em for Ron's trip to the doctor. It was set for 3 PM. We got picked up at 1 ish. The ride there wasn't bad, long but not bad. The driver let Ron use his patch cord to plug his MP3 player into her car's speakers. They were rockin' down the highway to all the old soul classics! She was singing and dancing in her seat, and we all had a blast.

We got there an hour ahead of time. No food place, I assumed it would be in a big medical building and I was wrong! They had a soda vending machine ( ) so I got a diet soda. An hour waiting in the office, I read the funny parts of a Reader's Digest to Ron. The office staff were smiling at him as he laughed.

Finally, they called our name. I love the doc, I'll call her Dr G. She came in and looked at Ron's photos (him at work, mowing the yard, etc), then asked him about his medical history and current symptoms. She examined him and did some osteopathic manipulations. Interestingly enough, she told us Ron's right arm is messed up due to a rotator cuff injury he received in the accident. They could operate if he wanted (Ron - "No!"). She had me march him up and down the hall several times as she pointed and commented on various abnormalities.

Ron said he did feel better after the manipulations. She wants to review his neurology records, then maybe do some "looking" at his back. She said he has foot drop (he does, he was never fitted for a brace after the accident because I assume they figured he wouldn't live) which is factoring into his walking difficulty. I wish we'd seen her 5 years ago! She wrote orders for him to get a brace so he won't be tripping over his right foot.

She wants him to wear that (and keep up with the shin-guards) and check back in a few weeks. He is pretty thin, she wants to watch his weight. I'm going to be keeping a food log for her - everything he eats.

I feel very good about her. I like her AND I trust her. I am very careful with Ron these days, and I don't trust him to just anyone. You've got to be something special and I feel good about her.

I started getting a migraine after the appointment. It got really bad. Fortunately, I had some medicine. Unfortunately, our ride was late and the driver's style could best be described as "Lurching". Not great when you have a killer headache and nausea.

2 hours on the road, lurching, dropping off and picking up. THANK GOD for my phenergan. I was miserable but I didn't puke. Lurch, lurch. OH, and the rush hour traffic just made it worse! Misery! I was chewing one pepto tab after another, not even daring to drink my soda in case I did puke.

Finally, we got home, less than an hour ago. I immediately felt better just being on solid ground.

I checked the mail, and some shawls came. I also got some samples of mineral makeup I ordered! Yay!

I begged Ron to please NEVER make another appoiontment for 3 PM with Dr G. He agreed. I basically threw some dinner at him and he ate it.

Thank God! Now I can curl up in peace.

Taz, give the babies a kiss from me!

[skeopple]

Sorry your day was so tough. Those headaches must be terrible. I used to get migraines before they invented any meds for them. I never could have ridden around like you do.
So glad Ron's doctor is a good one. Why did he change doctors at this stge of the game?
Hope you are sleeping right now and resting comfortably.

[Zer]

Oh, Dr.G sounds wonderful! I agree that early-day is best for almost anything I have to do. I try to manage what I can, for early on, when I am fresh and able to cope with things. I sure hope Dr.G will find ways to make R's life easier.

Getting R to eat more than he burns sounds like a real challenge. P'butter goes with everything. Maybe you can pack a small p'butter for R to snack on, even if it is just a 1/2cup Glad container. The more he snacks the warmer he will be in chilly weather and those long waits and longer rides. Does he like pb candy like Reese's pieces or pb cups? Or is he a purist for p'butter straight up?

So glad the shin guards protect R from bashing himself.
What a relief that must be! Velcro eases the on/off biz too!

[kristina]

Hi Heather! Just thought I'd say hi :hiya

I love that ring! I also remember Desiderata being on the radio..some guy sang it...maybe I can find it on youtube...brb!


found it

YouTube - Desiderata-Les Crane-1971

[Houston Heather]

Ske, the primary care doctor had nothing to offer Ron. The neurologist said "Take the Neurontin, nothing I can do". The Neurontin does help with the tingling that was keeping Ron awake at night, so that was a win.

My big concern with Ron right now is keeping him from getting worse; and Physiatrists "aim" to do just that. She told me, in fact, that she can "definitely" keep Ron from getting worse. Talk to me!

If someone was actively helping him, I'd keep 'em. The primary care doctor was pretty awful, very much parent-child. Dr G is very respectful of what Ron wants and listens to his input - a very nice change. Physiatrists and Neurologists work together all the time so I feel good about having them both on his team.

Everyone we mentioned the rotator cuff injury to said the same thing: NO SURGERY. I am so glad Ron is opting not to get it! They said it is an awful, long recovery process.

This morning we went to Sam's Club and got some muffins and soda. We've had a real run on the Cokes and had to get more. Hey, if they're buying that's a good thing! I need to do candy tomorrow, too. I guess no one at work resolved to cut out the sugar!

I bought Ron a big plastic jar of his favorite treat ever, peanut butter filled pretzels. He ate some. I got some pizza, and he actually ate a few bites. I ate the top and left the rest. Then I called my aunt. As I was talking to her, I noticed Ron absently eating the pizza crust. He put it down halfway through, realized, "I'm eating!" decided it must taste OK, and continued to polish it off. I believe his flavors ARE gradually coming back, thank God.

Then, off to work. It was mostly helping Ron. Then, surprise! Ron's boss showed up for an inspection. There we were, fillin' 'em up. He's a nice guy, I like him a lot. I respect him too. He gaped at Ron putting bottled water in the machine from his wheelchair and asked me "How I was". I said, good, taking my pills, everything's fine. (I wasn't sure if the other vendor had called about the whole Ron getting screwed out of $90 issue, but I wasn't allowed to react issue). I didn't mention it and neither did the boss. He seemed fine. I did my usual customer service thing while he was there and he was pleased. It was obvious I always go the extra mile.

Oh, I was tired. I'm always tired after a migraine. It was really bad today. We came home and I went straight to bed. I ate some cream cheese for lunch, that was it. Thank you God! I woke up at 4.

I checked the mail and YAY! More, fun, mineral makeup came. I love this stuff, very natural, easy to apply, and it stays put. My skin seems happy too.

Later on I have to do some accounting stuff for Ron.

A nice quiet day. Tomorrow we work longer, but get the weekend off. That's good. I'll also have to file the online report.

Off I go to have some fun.

Edited to add:
Bubba's a lot better!

Ron just said forget the accounting work tonight!

[Snowman]

Hope your feeling better by now!

What wonderful news that you guys found Ron a Dr. that he likes!! I sure hope she is able to help him.

Glad Bubba's feeling better!

I finally found Low Carb shakes and thought of you when I bought them!! They are hard to find around here. I thought if Heather can have them and continue to lose, then I can try them and see if they work for me!

Glad you have the weekend off!! I do too.....I'm laid off work!! Seriously, I'd rather have to work than be laid off.

[Houston Heather]

Ron loves 'em too, especially Atkins Dark Chocolate. He is taking the whole borderline diabetic issue VERY seriously, thank God. In fact, he had me throw away a boatload of cereal, rice, crap like that I bought when everything tasted bad to him. Good riddance!

I'm sure some creature at the dump will have a good time with it.

I'm very happy with my mineral makeup. With the regular stuff, I'd sweat it off a couple hours into my day. I could literally wipe my face with a paper towel and watch it melt. Yuck. With this stuff, I got pretty sweaty running around today and I didn't lose a speck. I worked hard, came home, took a nap, woke up, cleaned out the kitchen, helped Ron with the accounting, and took off my makeup. And it was all there - I had gotten very tired of using a makeup remover that came away blank, if that makes sense. Eyes, blush, everything, still there. I still looked "natural" too. I didn't use a name brand, either, just a nice lady on Ebay.

After I get paid, bigger sizes of the stuff. If I like the samples, time to buy bigger ones. I'm thrilled. I usually don't wear makeup but this stuff is easy to apply, stays put, makes me look good. I want Ron to go "Wow!" when God gives him his sight back one day - "I had a pretty hot wife!" It's about respecting myself too. Why not look my best? This is a huge leap for me, self-esteem wise. I have never considered myself worth fixing up.

An interesting consequence of Ron's ailments is that they tend to drive home to me - I'm not that bad! I can do an awful lot! Right now I'm a personal assistant, accounting assistant, assistant manager, nutritionist, physical therapist, and home care provider. I do it all well, and Ron and the business are thriving. Way to go, Heather.

Bubba isn't sneezing at all and looks great. I'm so glad we took him to the vet. I told people today, we spent twice as much on the cat as we did on Ron! That's why I only have 2 cats. If they both got sick at the same time, we could afford to care for them.

I did the candy bars today after eating a good snack. Ron sold some quarters to the other vendor, who is STILL harping on the Dr Pepper incident. I'm over it and we're the ones who got screwed! It's pretty funny now. I didn't laugh at the other vendor, though.

Snacks were otherwise OK. Someone complained about a food machine - they tend to get a little grubby. I scrubbed it out right as everyone was coming in on break, then I stocked it. Ron asked me if I was done cleaning it. I told him, yeah, and I stocked it too. He was very relieved. The vendor put in extra chili cheese dogs for Ron - he says it's the Libby's chili that makes them so tasty. Now YOU know.

The coffee machine was almost totally empty so I had to stock it. Ron had to do an emergency stocking of a soda machine. At the last minute. We won't ask him why he looked at the biggest-sales machine last. No, we won't do that. We'll remember he has brain damage from being hit by a truck and put the whole shrill thing off to the side. It wouldn't do any good and it'd just make him feel crappy. Then he'll get mad and we'll argue. NOT worth it.

Sales actually seem to be a little better this month than they were last month. Usually it's the other way around. I am NOT complaining!

I had to wait outside for an hour on our ride. Ah, the joys of public transit, but we don't have any auto expenses, either.

Now, I have 2 days off, probably, and Ron gave me a little fun money. Yay! I see a fun trip on the bus tomorrow.

[Houston Heather]

I try not to complain. Of course, that's an obvious lead in to: "Heather then complains".

I felt pretty alert earlier. I only took a 2 hour nap. I woke up, helped Ron, cooked some taco meat, which he ATE! Finally, he can eat meat and cheese, at least some. I was cooking 2 things at once, feeling good.

Then I ate and took my lithium. Groggy, fatigued. Hard to type. Soooo tired. I feel very foggy and "thick".

Then I look at my happy husband snoring away in his room, the fact that these same pills have helped me lose 60 pounds (If I was up or down, I was eating poorly). People seek out my company. I don't see that alarmed look as people start backing away from me. I still have $20 in my fun money account - anyone who's dealt with bipolar disorder will tell you it's near impossible to keep from spending all your money on weird crap every time you go up.

Yeah. It sucks. It sucks a lot. But, to quote my Dad, "It's better than the alternative".

[Zer]

Heather, your dad's quote reminds me of an old friend who capped off his reflections on aging - most particularly his pique at not being able to digest well some foods that he could now afford that were not affordable when he was a young man with a good digestion. He'd grumble a bit, and then say "But getting older, with all its drawbacks, is better than the alternative" - and we'd all agree!.

Originally Posted by Houston Heather

...to quote my Dad, "It's better than the alternative".

[Houston Heather]

Yup!

I slept in today, all the way to 8. I took a Carnitine with my morning lithium and I feel very alert. Maybe I just need some Carnitine.

Ron asked me to download some tunes. It was very funny that we both had planned to download "You're my best friend" by Queen and "I'm your Captain/closer to home" by Grand Funk Railroad. Other than listening to 6 versions of "Third Rate Romance" it was fun.

It's kind of chilly and windy today, I decided to stay home and veg. Yay!

[Houston Heather]

I'm still pretty tired but I've been peeing a lot. I'll take that as a good sign. Maybe I just needed the Carnitine to jump start my weight loss again.

[skeopple]

I was changing purses/bags today and I found some knitting I'd started last winter. Thought of you right away. I really feel like getting back into it. It gives me a lot of satisfaction to make something useful.

What's carnitine do? I forgot.

[DavesGirl]

Originally Posted by Houston Heather

Yup!

I slept in today, all the way to 8. I took a Carnitine with my morning lithium and I feel very alert. Maybe I just need some Carnitine.

Ron asked me to download some tunes. It was very funny that we both had planned to download "You're my best friend" by Queen and "I'm your Captain/closer to home" by Grand Funk Railroad.

That Grand Funk Railroad is one of my favorites!
How long have you been taking the Carnitine and what does it do for you?

Also, I'm really interested in the mineral makeup you used....could you tell me the name or who the seller is?

So glad you all found DR G!

[Houston Heather]

Carnitine is good for energy and fat burning. I stopped taking my supplements when Ron got sick. I just didn't have the heart for it.

Before I forget, at the very least I have a progress pictures link, if not an actual photo. Here goes.

YEEEHAW! A couple more pictures here Heather knits, the junk food queen

Um, the seller. Glominerals and Goldeneye822. I like Goldeneye better, she's the one I plan to buy the bigger kit from after I get paid. Catalogbrasfinds has awesome eye makeup that stays all day, including sweating like a pig and taking a nap.

I downloaded some Christian Raggaeton and hip-hop for myself. :laugh We are certainly 2 different people!

I need to go to bed!

Let me know what you think of the photos. Sorry they took so long.

[skeopple]

Heather, I don't know what to say. I've been lurking on your journal here and just now read at your blog. You are one intelligent woman with a great writing talent. You put your thoughts into a way that the reader can practically translate into a movie. I feel as if I know you well. You are incredible. Your weight loss astounds me, as well as your dedication as caregiver to Ron and the furbabies. Your determination and self worth is priceless. The way you control your meds amazes me. Your faith in God impresses me. I know you don't care what others think, but I think you are wonder-ful.

[kristina]

Wow, Heather!! Those pictures are great I love the backgrounds Can sure tell you've lost weight
I agree with Sharon's post above!

[Houston Heather]

Thank you both!

I got Ron his own Fitday. This ought to be interesting. I will preface it by saying, I want him eating more protein and fat, and fewer carbs.

Ron's Fitday
I called him "Heather's husband".

I'm very happy to see he's already over 900 calories. I think the hardest part for him will be keeping track of his "treat" intake. Doc was pretty clear, he needs to gain some weight.

Off I go. He wants me to describe the imagery - a show on Dark Matter (astrophysics stuff).

[lisabinil]

Just read your story you wrote about you and Ron-very inspirational. True love still exists in this world!

[Houston Heather]

Aw, thank you!

I can't imagine life without him.

Funny thing today, Ron's eaten more calories than I have! I think I'm starting to see why I "stalled". Not enough food! BAD Heather!

[DavesGirl]

Woo hoo! Can you say hourglass figure?! You look fab!!
The PG is not the same without you...so I'll just come here to keep up with ya!

[Houston Heather]

Good! A lot of people apparently never knew I was here. I just need to cut out all the stress I can, I have a lot on my plate and I need to take care of myself. I'm still learning how to do that.

I decided to make tonight a cook night - boil up a bunch of eggs for Ron - I hate peeling them, such a PITA! But he can eat them and they're good for him so I've got about a dozen going.

As they cook, I've got a skillet full of ground sausage, then after the sausage is done I'll cook scrambled eggs in the grease, then make "Sausage and Egg" bowls topped with grated cheddar cheese [drool]. So easy to grab one and nuke it!

You can probably guess I haven't taken my lithium yet, once I do the sausage I'll eat and take it. It'll kick in about the time I finish up. Medication and boiling water, hot skillets full of grease, not a safe idea. I work it.

When Ron wakes up I gotta feed him dinner. Then I have to log it.... finish the laundry, and do the dishes.

I need to be asleep in about 2 hours. It's doable. Ron made "You're getting paid tomorrow noises". That means a trip to Wally world. I'm thinking about cube steaks, I haven't had any in ages. I need to get more ground beef for Ron. Now that we know he can eat it, he's going to be eating a lot of it if I have anything to say about it!

Off I go to check on the clothes. Bubba cat was lying in front of Ron's closet last I checked. He knows I won't disturb Him to hang clothes. If He's moved, I'll hang 'em. Otherwise they stay on the back of his chair. I'm a good, dumb, animal.

I know the smart animal doesn't have an alarm clock.

[Zer]

Originally Posted by Houston Heather

Funny thing today, Ron's eaten more calories than I have! I think I'm starting to see why I "stalled". Not enough food! BAD Heather!

Interesting, that tracking R's intake and coaxing him to eat more has had impact on your own LC plan. What a great payoff for getting R his own FitDay and tracking his calories. Your sausage-egg-cheese bowls sound so good that I may well try to make some up for myself. I am so particular about how my eggs are scrambled - like 'em soft and custardy! - that it is probably not a good idea to ask anyone to cook 'em up for me. So, I'll try to work out a way to do the eggs myself. Funny how I accept leathery eggs in a fastfood delivery, but want something better when I can manage to get it.

[Houston Heather]

It makes sense to me, Zer. Maybe you could even try Sardines and eggs? Pour the sauce over the eggs? I might try that myself.

I turned on my MP3 player and have "Wake up the Dead" on repeat.

YouTube - Family Force 5- Wake Up the Dead

I love the song, it's easy to listen to, and why not.

I was dancing in front of the stove, some pretty good moves in my opinion. I felt I was being watched, and turned my head. Two freaked-out cats gaped at me before they bolted out the cat door. Apparently my dancing is as bad as my singing. Good thing Ron's blind.

Ron isn't hungry AGH. My sausage should be almost done. Off I go.

[Houston Heather]

I've been stuffing Ron at every opportunity, and he's still 200 calories short of his BMR. I'm going to have to become a nag...

I did give him some hardboiled eggs and milk, even though he wasn't hungry. I told him, peeled hardboiled eggs are in a gallon ziplock, on the door of the fridge, along with your apples. If I had a dollar for every apple he's eaten, we could pay off the mortgage! Now he can lurch out there if he wants and get himself a healthy snack.

I put my food into fitday, and everything was great except for magnesium and iron. Maybe that's a factor in my fatigue - iron? I do donate a lot of blood. Might be worth considering.

[Houston Heather]

I found some B-50 in my vitamin box last night. I put it on my side table along with my lithium and friends. This morning, I took a B-50, Carnitine, lithium, and anti-depressant.

I didn't get tired until about 1 PM. That's a big deal. I got some CoQ10, antioxidants (one factor in my breakouts - not enough A and E), and a multi with iron. I'm going to work those into my pills - I've already figured out who's an evening pill and who's a morning pill. You can't take iron and E at the same time, the iron will "eat" the E. Can you tell I seriously considered majoring in nutrition?

When Ron first came home from the hospital, I had a terrible time getting him to drink his water. He had a bladder infection and a catheter at the time. I finally asked a Urologist for a good "baseline" level of urine - per day. He said 900 ml. I told Ron, we need to get you to 900 ml a day. If you can't do it on your own then I'm going to come after you with a glass of water every time you're awake. It worked great - he had a contest to see how soon he could hit 900 ml.

I told him, according to fitday, he needs at least 1,600 calories a day to maintain and probably 1800 to gain. Yesterday he got 1400. He's already trying to "reach" it. It helps to use a man's competitive nature against his illness!

Today we went to work and filled 'em up. Plenty of activity for me. I got pretty sweaty, it made me glad I hadn't put on any makeup today. I guess I'll just have sweaty days. Would I rather be sick? No.

I got the money and counted it. Enough to pay me and make a deposit. Next stop, the bank.

I was sneaky. I brought Ron's "treats" - that's what we call his pretzel things. I handed him the bag at the bus stop and sure enough he started munching. I don't even know if he was aware of it.

He kept munching in the cab and the driver asked what he was eating. He offered her some. She liked them so much Ron let her keep the rest.

The bank went great, just enough time to transact the business without being stuck there forever. Then, off to Walmart.

Bad news was they left us there for 2 hours - per Ron "Too long". I had a great time. I made my deposit, got the groceries, and spent longer than I'll admit deliberating over mascara. I wanted something waterproof, black, not too fakey. I'm happy. Then I had to get something to take it off. Pretty good scam there.

I started getting really hungry. Grocery shopping and hunger is a bad idea. I went to McD's. I ordered 2 double cheeseburgers, 2 chicken breast filets (I ate it all), and a fried fish sandwich for Ron. I gave it to him with a sack of "treats" - about 5 bags, and a bottle of water. Ron was pretty annoyed.

"I'm not hungry! Don't buy me food I won't eat!" I apologized and left. When I was done shopping, he'd eaten the sandwich and drank most of the water. Good thing I'm a disobedient wife.

I got my usual stuff. I found 2 cute clearance tops for $3 each, kind of dressy. Kind of too big, in a large! If I can find another black in a medium I'll get it. I'm not used to seeing myself as a medium. That and the mascara was about the extent of my indulgence. I got cheese, stuff for Ron, etc.

This 2 week budget's going to feel a pinch because I see my doctor on the 29th. That's $50. I pay for that, and Ron pays for the prescriptions. I only see him every 3 months unless my brain is melting. And that only happened once. Anyway, that's $50 less than I'm used to.

I had fun, I'm happy, I still have some cash money left in this week's budget. If I can, I plan to go out and do some shopping on Wednesday by myself. I like to leave Ron at home if I can.

I forgot to mention that while my scale showed a slight increase, my water percentage is WAY up and my fat percentage is DOWN! I'll take it!

[Houston Heather]

I ate a lot of food today, but not enough carbs! Still less than 20. Agh. I need to up those carbs!

I just had a lot of fun on Ebay with this week's internet fun money. I got a full size kit of the mineral makeup I like, and some more eyeshadow from another seller I love.

I made a casserole out of cut up broccoli and cauliflower, cheese, a scrambled egg, and some ground pork sausage. It was really excellent. I thought it would suck, but it didn't.

Ron told me, we don't have to get up 'till 6, and it's just "Work and Home". He ate 1600 calories today, thank God. The cream cheese and apple was a stroke of genius. I also kept him well supplied with "treats".

[Houston Heather]

Bad gallbladder day.

I ate some bacon just now for lunch. Either that'll fix me or that'll fix me.

[Houston Heather]

Well, it looks like I get to keep my gallbladder for now - the bacon challenge and a nap worked. It's been really cranky for the last day or so, more than usual, but I feel fine now.

If I get any of the warning signs I'll go to the nonprofit hospital and get it taken care of. I'm just not wild about the idea of waiting forever in a room with a bunch of sick people, surgery, and not being able to work if I can help it.

I paid for my mineral makeup, so I should get it in a few days. I really like the stuff.