Heather Shrinks in Houston!

[Houston Heather]

Bad news first. I heard of a study that states "Drinking is OK during pregnancy" now. It is so depressing. It ISN'T. You'll damage your kid's brain and set them up for a far more difficult life, but the study says:

LONDON, Oct. 31 (UPI) -- Boys born to light drinkers get higher-than-average vocabulary scores and girls are less likely to have emotional problems, a university study suggests.

Yeah, RIGHT. That's why I spent so much of my life in agonizing emotional pain. Because my Mom drank when pregnant, messing up my brain. I hope expectant mothers can see beyond this bull to the truth, which is no amount of alcohol is safe while pregnant.

OK, that and a recurrent headache were the worst things to happen today. I started knitting some fingerless gloves. The yarn is very soft and light, I won't be able to wear these gloves while pushing a wheelchair. But I'm still making them. They'd be nice when I'm waiting on a delivery.

I felt very glamourous wearing my shawl today. It is gorgeous. I love it. The more I wore it, the more I loved it. I could push Ron in the wheelchair, get in and out of heavy, locked, doors, and stayed pleasantly toasty but not miserable. I can hardly wait to make another one in magenta maybe. It was a lot of fun.

The other vendor's wife took some pictures of me. She did a great job with my half-marathon pics (and I told her so) so I trust her to take good ones of me & my shawl.

My weight was up, I don't know why. 182 I think. My jeans still fit OK. I'm just trying to figure it out. I think I'm reacting to peanuts, so I'm cutting them out of the menu this month. Today the headaches made it hard to eat, so I had 3 slimfast lowcarbs, some hamburger patties, a chicken breast patty, and that's it.

I have no idea what I'll do for dinner.

More later!

[Houston Heather]

I should know better than to start a fetal alcohol thread. Lots of people fighting to defend their "right" to drink while pregnant. What's so great about it that you HAVE to have it? No one can answer that.

At any rate, I don't want to get upset so I'm staying out of there. Not worth it. Let them believe it's fine to drink while pregnant. When they end up with me, they'll see it differently. Ron said "Big Booze" probably funded that study. Probably.

My right arm is twitching in an odd manner. Looks like I'm a little toxic today. No lithium with my dinner tonight!

[Houston Heather]

Doing better today, but tired.

I walked 5 miles to vote. Yay me! I'm proud of myself because I feel I really did my research and voted for the best. I didn't vote straight anything, I made my own choices.

I also stocked candy bars today without touching any. Ron had to put our ride on hold, but I had my Slimfast lowcarb and my lithium. So when pill time hit I could take it.

I'm a little gassy from LC bars, but otherwise OK. I am wearing my "tighter" jeans but they still fit OK. They fit great, in fact. If I maintain for a little bit I'm OK with that.

It does take a little getting used to - I'm getting a lot more attention from men. I'm used to being invisible.

I'm glad I actually got out and got some sun. I think it's important for me to get sun and fresh air if I want to prevent my usual winter depression.

My fingerless gloves are progressing well. I'm really happy with them. I plan to make a few pairs for family members, and then move up to mittens. After that, gloves! And fingerless glove/convertible mittens. Then... maybe a vest.

It's nice to have lots of fun concepts and ideas, without being overwhelmed by compulsions to spend all my money and talk nonstop. I think I am perfectly balanced right now.

Boy, I'm tired. Ltt - example - lots of typos.

Tomorrow I go to Social Security. Then it's a fun trip to THE CRAFT STORE! On Metrolift, no less, so I don't have any bus hassles (Ron gets tacos with guacamole and chips). I've been wanting to go to this store.

[Houston Heather]

Horrible, agonizing migrane today. I started vomiting right around our first pickup. Ron called Metrolift while I was puking and cancelled. Apparently our phone has good pickup because they asked "Is that your wife in the background?" and when he said yes, they said no problem.

So, lying in bed. My ice bag leaks. Only one phenergan suppository. Ron made an emergency run to Walmart, but our freind parked across the parking lot and had Ron walk. Ron is miserable. Ron can't even walk into work anymore! Yesterday he rode on my cart, along with my candy. I'm sure Ron, in his delicate manner, made it clear he couldn't walk back to the truck. 'Cause our buddy left him by the door and came back to pick him up.

Every few hours, I vomited miserably, down to horrid, wretched heaves. I had eaten a "Good breakfast" trying to get out of my peanut habit. Bad idea.

I would say, what a wasted day, but around 5 PM I thought "I bet my Knitpicks package came today" and sure enough it had. I took it in to Ron, and had him open it. He said "I really like this thick yarn, what are you using it for?" I told him "Your new hat". The yarn I got to make myself gloves is very soft and luxurious. I can't do any knitting today but I have it! 2 circular needles, 2 sets of double-points (I feel so smart kniting with them), 3 skeins of thick, soft yarn for Ron, and 2 skeins of thin, soft, durable yarn for gloves for me and Mom. I won't tell her the name is "Wicked Stepmother". She is the farthest thing from Wicked you can imagine.

I'm glad I made several PB&J sandwiches (crust cut off) for Ron yesterday, he's been eating them today, he said.

I have decided, no more peanut products, and no slimfast for a week. In a month or two, I can add back the Slimfast but one or both is my migraine culprit.

We still have to go so Social Security, Houston Vital Records, and I still want to go to Michaels.

[Zer]

Heather, so do you figure you are "allergic" to peanuts? Not so bad that you cannot make R his PB&J, but so toxic to you that you'd better not ingest any yourself. So sorry.

Myself, I do not dare have a jar of p'butter. Makes me want bread so badly! That leads me to want milk - another addictive substance for me. So, no PB!

Hope you are feeling better soon. Hope you can get to knitting soon too.

[Snowman]

I hope your feeling real soon, Heather!

My computer was getting fixed, that's why I haven't been around to check on you, but I did think of you and Ron and say a prayer for you both!

You walked 5 miles to vote!! WOW

[Houston Heather]

Yeah. I won some, I lost some, but the elections were pretty close.

Feeling better today, just tired, and down 1/2 an inch off my waist! Yay!

[Houston Heather]

Well, the half inch came back. I don't think Ron will be able to go to the craft store with me today, he said he didn't sleep all night (tingling and burning in his feet). We'll see, he may surprise me. He said he really wanted to go and was very disappointed when I had the migraine.

So, up at 2:30 today. I couldn't stand the thought of a sausage for breakfast, so I had a slimfast lowcarb. Worst case, I have tomorrow off and plenty of phenergan suppositories. But I don't think it's the Slimfast. I wanted to take my pills, and I did that.

My first glove is cute, maybe a little tight at the top, but cute. It is a little itchy, but it's a good start. I have some glorious, fine, soft yarn I just ordered that will work beautifully for my next pair.

I made it to Friday!

[Houston Heather]

The other vendor's wife LOVED my gloves, so I'm going to make her a pair. It'll give me a good chance to practice.

Oh, today was exhausting. Something happened - I can't talk about it. It's not my privacy, but Ron's. It was very wearing for both of us and wore us out. He came home and collapsed.

We got all our deliveries. Ron had to put the ride on hold because of the thing I can't talk about. Our friend Chuck was in the area, so he gave Ron a ride home, and me a ride to the craft store.

I went to Michaels first. I was not impressed with their yarn selection. They had a lot of very interesting books, but not much yarn. I bought myself a salad. Depression was trying to get me so I took 2 lithium. I ended up getting queasy from that but it did stop the depression.

Then I had to cross a very busy street, literally 10 lanes I think. Some moron is yelling at me to go when it's not safe. I yelled back (finally) "I'll go when it's safe!". Which I did. I didn't want to be near him so I walked down to the next bus stop. That was a good walk.

I caught the bus to the Starbucks/Hobby Lobby shopping center. I got myself a heavy whipping cream thing and went to Hobby Lobby. I bought a gorgeous skein of oatmeal heather yarn. I can mix it with the brown heather I have and make a gorgeous shawl in soft, natural tones. I could see it as soon as I picked up the yarn.

I also got some alpaca/acrylic yarn that's washable, for all the fingerless gloves. I called my aunt while I was at the bus stop to go home. We had a good talk.

Walking home from the bus stop, I was stopped by a cab. It was one of our Metrolift drivers. He gave me a ride home.

What a nice ending to the day. Now I'm going to get a nap.

[Zer]

Hope R is feeling better, from whatever interrupted his workday. Glad R caught a ride home as you finished off the day and made your crafty visits. Busy gal!

[Houston Heather]

Oh, I had a blast. I also got whistled at and someone at work mentioned the weight loss. Ron's OK, today, back to normal.

We went to Walmart, I was worried it would be crazy but it wasn't. I came home, cleaned out the fridge, and put up the groceries. We got great rides to and from the store, and I had just enough time to shop.

I had so much fun this morning, I had a pair of size 10 "eased fit" jeans. My 12's are getting very baggy in the butt, so I tried the 10's on. They fit great.

I was so happy I pranced into Ron's room and made him feel my butt, in the new jeans. He said I looked "hot". That really made my day. I have to wash them before I wear them. I wore the 12's to Walmart and kept pulling them up.

I did try on another pair of 10 eased fits and they did not fit, but I've got one pair that fits great. I can only wear one at a time. Ron likes the idea of going to Taco Bell this week and trying some food, while I drop off a bag of "fat pants" at Salvation Army.

Ron also bought me a cute long sleeve tshirt and some asprin for work. The other day I had a killer headache and he told me he didn't want to watch me suffer. He's a good guy.

After I came home and put up the groceries, I mowed the yard. Someone's dog got into the yard (part of the fence is down due to the hurricane) and left a "gift". As I threw it away, I thought, even though the cats bury their waste, they do this in other people's yard. Now I know how they feel.

We have a pretty big yard, about .15 acre. It's good exercise.

On our way home, I told the driver we have cats. We encountered a driver with a cat phobia once, she took one look at poor little Baby Girl and had a panic attack. 3 pounds of terror! I actually had to crawl out the emergency exit and LOCK the cat up before she'd let Ron off the van. So, I mention that we have cats.

As I was bringing in the groceries, Bubba came out and said hello to the driver. The driver grinned and said "Hi Kitty". It was cute.

I'm having a good day, someone admired my fingerless gloves so much she wanted to buy them. I would never sell my work, I like having artistic control. I do enjoy giving things away.

I'm a little queasy, which is ironic. I got all kinds of good food to eat and now I'm sick to my stomach.

Anyway, I have to eat regardless, lithium time, so we'll see how some sausage and cheese works. It sure looks good.

[Zer]

Heather, is it time to invest in some snazzy red suspenders to keep your britches from falling off you as you slim down?

Originally Posted by Houston Heather

Oh, I had a blast. I also got whistled at and someone at work mentioned the weight loss.... I had so much fun this morning, I had a pair of size 10 "eased fit" jeans. My 12's are getting very baggy in the butt, so I tried the 10's on. They fit great. ... I wore the 12's to Walmart and kept pulling them up.

I did try on another pair of 10 eased fits and they did not fit, but I've got one pair that fits great. I can only wear one at a time. Ron likes the idea of going to Taco Bell this week and trying some food, while I drop off a bag of "fat pants" at Salvation Army.

[Houston Heather]

Nah, now that I've washed the 10's I'll be good.

[skeopple]

Hah, the last time I wore size 10 was ..................................probably........ .....................................
geez......................I can't remember. I was a size 12 for about 2 hours in 1982 after going to a diet doctor that gave out pills that made me clean house around the clock. Whew, fun times. Until I went by ambulance to E.R. with heart problems. Scared me bad.

Congrats Heather. I love the beach pic of you and Ron. You two are so cute together.

[*Pear*]

Stopping by to say Hi! I've been reading your blog and you are doing great! Wish I could say I was in a size 10. I started before you did and you have totally blown right by me. I'm hopelessly stalled now.

I also wanted to say what a beautiful person you are. You take such fantastic care of Ron and run the business and are doing great at dieting. You sparkle!

God bless you!

[Houston Heather]

Thank you! You are so sweet and that is JUST what I needed to hear. Ron just yelled at me for a messy kitchen sink. I told him, a lot of it is your dishes. You don't even prepare your own food. I am doing EVERYTHING here, and you're going to yell at me because you had to move some dishes to put something down the disposal? He didn't want to hear that, shouted at me, the old "I wouldn't have picked you! But I'm STUCK with you!"

I said, fine, fix your own food. And, I'm putting all your food on this counter. It's YOUR problem now. You prepare it, you eat it. If "All I do is open a can and heat it up" he can do that.

Once I put all his stuff on the one counter, the kitchen looked way better. I did the dishes, like I said a lot of them were his, I just hadn't gotten around to (when?). He came out and started up again.

I asked him, did he want us to have a screaming fight? No. OK, then leave me alone. You made your position clear. I am turning up my music and I won't hear anything you say from this point on. He kept talking, realized I'd meant it, and left.

He doesn't seem to care about the load I'm carrying. I wake up with a headache every freaking day for over a week, I'm always sick to my stomach from my medication now, I'm doing his job and mine at work... taking over his chores at home, and all I get is "I wouldn't have picked you".

I'm not even supposed to be able to live on my own, much less be a full-time caregiver! A little thanks now and then would be great. Who cleans the toilet? Who buys the toilet paper? Who does the laundry and hangs it up? Who walks over a mile each way to buy the cat food and bring it home to the cats? Who cleans up the dead rats? Who gets rid of the live rats? Who does the grocery shopping? Who fixes his dinner? Who mows the yard? Who takes out the trash? Who unloads the pallets at work? Who puts the sodas on the cart for Ron to stock? Who puts heavy cases of bottled drinks in the fridge? Who gets the deliveries? Who takes out the dumpster?

Earlier today he told me he wanted to go to work tomorrow, so I don't even have it off like I was promised.

I ate clean, got plenty of exercise at work, took all my pills, my mood is reasonable considering. But I. Am. Pissed.

[pennylovesdarren]

Heather! I'd have picked you! You're a saint! (and a hard working one at that!)

Take a break today, a long break, and do something that you enjoy doing!

[Houston Heather]

Thanks Penny!

Bubba loves me. He knew I was not having a good night so he brought me a huge, live roach, at least 3 inches long. He dropped it right by my foot and meowed proudly.

I did get out a lot of aggression murdering the roach with an old shoe. WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! Paper towel and disinfectant.

Then I picked up Bubba and had a little talk about live prey in the house.

Ay, yi, yi.

[Zer]

Sorry that R got grouchy. That must hurt, as much as you sacrifice for him and his needs. You seriously need to arrange for some RELIEF, someone to help, to be available for R (just so he appreciates how much you DO and intuit for him) and to pick up the slack by jumping in to help you maintain the house when it is too much to do all that AND satisfy Mr.Independent's agenda for his "staff".

You'd feel so much better if you had someone to help you. Do see about this, as you may be astonished at how it feels to come home to a house someone has cleaned. Just a weekly cleaning might give you and your life a BIG LIFT!

Love how your furbaby gifts you - letting you work out your feelings like that! Bet it felt GOOD to squash that monster bug, even if you had to clean up after!

[pennylovesdarren]

You're obviously Bubba's sweetheart!

[Houston Heather]

Bubba loves me, this I know, for his prey does tell me so...

Ron understood what I was saying. He woke me up this morning, to ask if it was "OK if we didn't go in to work". I said, sure. Gee, I get the day off .

I had fun knitting, cooking, (Ron gets grumpy about cooking odors, but living in Houston I could open my windows while cooking) and now posting. When I finish up, I'm going to take my nap.

I ate my lunch kind of late (10ish) so I took both lithium tablets then. Might as well get the lunch dose while I'm at it.

Ron liked the sloppy joe mix. He had asked me to make him some. I did. I mixed a small amount of sauce and meat, then served it on a small hamburger bun with milk. He said it wasn't bad, and he'd like to eat more sometime. I proceeded to mix the rest and freeze most of it. Now I can easily make him a sandwich whenever he wants. He got a good mix of whole wheat bread, meat, veggies, and protein (milk and meat). He said he was very full and was taking a nap.

I'm at least half done with his hat, and I'm starting to make myself the Santa hat I've been wanting to knit myself for ages.

I'm glad I'm smart enough to make having fun a priority. It is so important to prevent burnout.

Oh, and I finally got back down to 177.5.

[Snowman]

177.5!!!! GREAT JOB HEATHER!!!

Heather ~ YOUR doing a great job taking care of EVERYTHING!!

I finally went back to the gym!! I haven't been there since July! DD and I promised each other we are going. I got laid off on Oct. 31st, so I have no excuse!! Our DS is getting married next year and I want/need to lose 30 lbs.

I'm so glad you take time to do fun stuff for yourself!! Your inspiring me to try crocheting again. I haven't done it in ages.

Hope Bubba listens to you!!

[Houston Heather]

So do I! For now, since it's a rainy, "Cold" (low 50s) day, he's got me on valet service. Meow at the outside of the door to come in, and meow at the inside to go out. He slept with me when I had my nap, so I oblige him.

Oh, I got ADORABLE cat photos on my camera. I swear they were posing for me.

My favorite is the 2 cats prancing around on Ron as he's lying in bed. He likes help sitting up now.

Ron LOVED the hat, which I finished. It's a nice durable wool/alpaca blend in a chunky weight (about pencil thickness). In teal. A nice manly color, but one I enjoyed looking at for hours.

NOW I have cast on to make the infamous Santa hat.

[Houston Heather]

I've had a lot of nausea and stomach pain recently. I started taking some Licorice root tablets, they're good for ulcers. I won't be doubling up on the lithium for a while. If I need 4 tablets, I'm going to space them out.

It sucks being queasy and knowing I need to eat or I'll get ugly.

[Houston Heather]

Gallstone. Ugh. I don't have any symptoms that require an ER visit, so I'll just muddle on through the day. UGH.

Tomorrow we go and take care of a bunch of paperwork we need. Not fun, but I'll be glad when it's over.

[Houston Heather]

Yay! No more gallstone. Ugh. I hate them.

I had a good nap after lunch. Zer, you'll like this one. I had a dream where we went on a roadtrip together, in a luxuriously appointed bus.

When I woke up, I had 2 sweet cats in my bed. That's a nice way to wake up.

[Houston Heather]

Yay. Dinner and last lithium is down the hatch.

[Zer]

Originally Posted by Houston Heather

I had a good nap after lunch. Zer, you'll like this one. I had a dream where we went on a roadtrip together, in a luxuriously appointed bus.

When I woke up, I had 2 sweet cats in my bed. That's a nice way to wake up.

How nice, to wake up with cats cuddling and cozy. I like your idea of a roadtrip in a posh bus. I'm watching a tale of 3 men who travel Australia (gorgeous scenery) in a massive bus filled with lots of nice stuff including a tanning bed, if you can believe that!

It's "Priscilla, Queen of the Desert" a travelogue that looks as if it's intended to entice viewers to want to see Australia for themself. The government underwrote part of the production cost - and the scenery is just breath-taking. Wild and rugged country. Big country, too. Vast.

Great story about a man whose very independent wife has reared a wonderful boy on her own and who calls on the estranged husband after a 6yr separation to take the child for a few months, to get to know his son.

The child is amazing, a credit to his single mom's belief that honesty is the best policy and her belief that her child is competent to handle life and will make up his own mind about his values as he matures. I like this film a lot!

Like the bus a lot too, except when it breaks down and they do not have a clue how to fix it. No more than I know how to fix my own turn signals. So dream on, about a posh bus. I'm content to dream about that myself from the safety of my bed. No cats, alas, to nap with me. Ah, I miss cats!

[Houston Heather]

I'll look for one, Zer. My favorites are dilute calicos:



Solid black cats, solid white cats, solid grey cats, 2 color cats, and tabby cats. But my favorites right now are Frosty and Bubba. I really got the most precious photos ever, I can hardly wait to develop them.

I'm almost done with my turq/magenta/orange hat. I like it, but I want to play with colorwork (making and orange stitch, and then a magenta one), so I've already planned my next hat. That, plus a few pair of fingerless gloves for everyone, ought to keep me busy for a while.

Tomorrow will entail a lot of time waiting at government offices. Good news: shelter from the elements, bathrooms. Bad news: Bring my own food, and my own entertainment. I wish Ron had let me bring home the wheelchair but he said NO.

I fell in love with an independent man so I'd better respect that. I'd hate to change him into someone I didn't love anymore, not that he'd EVER let me.

Anyway, time to go to bed.

[Zer]

Hope your day with bureaucrats proves fruitful. Accomplishing ANYthing with bureaucrats really frazzles my nerves.

Originally Posted by Houston Heather

Tomorrow will entail a lot of time waiting at government offices. Good news: shelter from the elements, bathrooms. Bad news: Bring my own food, and my own entertainment.

I wish Ron had let me bring home the wheelchair but he said NO.

I fell in love with an independent man so I'd better respect that. I'd hate to change him into someone I didn't love anymore, not that he'd EVER let me.

Wonderful awareness that changing a person turns him/her into a different entity than we were attracted to in the first place. R is a lucky man, to have a partner who respects that fact. Now, why no wheelchair, I wonder. Maybe R wants bureaucrats to see his struggle to walk on his own - or is there a courtesy wheelchair offered, as some places seem to offer.

At any rate, it's wise of you to allow him to set his own transport, even if it is his own unsteady gait. I tend to resent people who prompt me to use a chair when they see my struggle to walk with a cane. I'm afraid if I got a chair I'd lose sight of my hope for improvement.

My feet are largely insensate from a nutritional neuropathy in mid1970s and from a family foot problem that has been traced from my paternal g'dad to my dad and his siblings, all of whom noted diminished capacity in their feet as they aged. All recall their dad's "bad feet" and believe that there is a hereditary problem. My cousins are alerting their MDs to this probability.

My own foot and balance problem may not be that alone, as I did have a peripheral neuropathy of astonishing extent in mid1970s as I suffered 8mos of tossing anything I ate while I lost half my 400# bodyweight. Most of my neuropathy seems to have repaired itself, far as I can tell. I'm no longer numb up to my tongue, as I was back before the WLSurgery was reversed to save my life. My speech was slurred before a 2d surgeon was located to undo the damage done by an inexperienced MD who had no biz practicing on me. I trusted him and a college prof who wanted to see if WLSurgery was a course she might give a try to. As mine WLS went bad, both dropped me - fast! They were friends, I gather. I quickly went downhill. They did not want to know me as I suffered the side effects of having my small intestine shortened from 26ft to 18" - lucky for me that it was a reversible truncation!

When I was put back together, my weight rose again to 400# as I ate the same old way and did not think that I'd live long. Here I am, 35yrs later, wishing I'd worked to stay at 200#, my low weight with the dreadful WLSurgery.