Imok finally learning

[imok160]

Well here I am day two, feeling pretty crappy but no real hunger pangs, deep down I know this is the way of life for me(low carb),I have never been able to stick to any other diet plan because I was always hungry!
I have had to learn the hard way that good health and longterm weight loss is going to take effort and commintment on my part and I am not going to find it in some pill or magic diet---it means changing my way of life. I always have to learn the hard way.
I hope to post often as I believe it will help me immensely.

[imok160]

My goal is to stay on plan, with no cheating and to start using the treadmill.
I get out of breath just walking to the car but I will start at ten minutes and work my way up. I felt so much better when I did exercise all the time, which was two years ago! I can't believe I have been trying to lose weight all that time and I am actually much bigger!!!Duh!! What I have done in the past has done nothing but hurt me!( as in diet,binge,binge,new diet, binge, exercise,binge,new diet..oh don't forget some miracle diet pills and no exercise= fatter me!)I never really stayed on any plan long enough to actually lose weight.
I know I need to be healthy and not just skinny!!

[imok160]

DAY FOUR-Feeling pretty good this morning. Staying on plan except perhaps as always I eat too much but, hopefully in time I will have a decrease in portion sizes. I plan on weighing after one week so I maybe I will lose some of the weight I gained when I let myself go for 3 weeks before I see the numbers. I am doing good considering I am still fighting a nasty sinus infection and its TOM.
Need to get exercise into the plan.I know I will start feeling much better and having energy and will be able get walking, as it is I manage to get through my work day but, by late afternoon I have nothing left, and my home shows it!

[imok160]

I forgot to note that I could not believe how many times I went to the bathroom the first two days,this was exhausting in itself!! I think I was in there ten times in the day and four times during the night! I was definately retaining fluids!

[imok160]

Well day 6 Sunday morning early. Feeling pretty good except for some aching joints and the ever present sinus problem. I am definately in ketosis and I don't think about food all the time but I eat too much of the food that I am allowed. I hope to get a handle on this with a little time I also need to take time and put some variety in my food. I seem to eat the same five or six staples all the time. I also need to get my butt moving on the treadmill, I know it will help to get some weight moving off of me and my lungs would certainly benefit from it.

[imok160]

Well day seven and I wish I felt better, it is not the woe, it is the sinus problem, it eases up and comes back with lots of pain and pressure,I just can't concentrate or really get any work done, I think I need some medication.
Well some good news I went to Appleby's yesterday with DH and stayed on plan, believe me the chicken caeser salad was great but the fancy chocolate Mochatini drink and the shot glass sundaes on the menu had me in a trance but I held out and feel all the better for it.
Here are some reasons to stay on plan:
NO bloat
No brain fog
No new pimples(note 48 with zits!!)
No heartburn
No pants cutting into my waist because I really need a bigger size
No acid reflux while sleeping
No grouchiness
No itching
No blotchy face/redness
I am sure this list will grow.
I am still fat but, I really feel I am actually on my way to a better me, and I realize finally that it will not happen overnight.

[imok160]

I forgot to mention that I need to start my exercise tomorrow, which will be 10 minutes on the treadmill and I will add a little every day. I also need to weigh and measure in the morning, I hope I will not feel too bad about the numbers.
I also want to note that I allow myself organic peanut butter and cocoa on plan if I really need it, otherwise I am strictly on Atkins induction.
I feel I am doing pretty good for a binge eater!

[imok160]

I am so tired! Tired of being fat and tired. Tired of not going out and socializing because I would rather hide my fat at home. Tired of trying to find something in my vast fat wardrobe that makes me look just a little less fat(HAHA this is a real joke as at 5'3" tall and 228 lbs there is no hiding it!!!).Tired of feeling like crap. Tired of waiting for my life to begin.Tired of wishing. TIRED OF MAKING EXCUSES!
I have been " dieting" (ha here is another laugh as I have never stuck with anything long enough to lose more than a few pounds) for four years and all I have managed to do is make myself FATTER!! I am not stupid so why does it take me so long to learn the obvious---its up to me, and it will not be easy.
O.K. enough of kicking myself. I beat myself up too much as it is.

[imok160]

Day10. I am feeling much better in the mornings and I actually wake up before the alarm but I still just don't have any energy. I know eating cleanly really helps me feel better but I still can't seem to get any exercise in my day and by 5:30 when I get home I already feel exhausted, it is all I can do to get some food ready and clean up and do some housework before I melt. I am now taking some antibiotics so I hope the sinus infection clears up soon and maybe then I will have some energy.
I weighed this morning and it is still the same! What! I am still fat! This is how I actually feel, like I should have lost all the weight that I want to lose in ten days! This is my mentallity. I want everything RIGHT NOW! I think I am making some progress and finally getting into my brain that it will not happen overnight but I still get discouraged, the difference is that now I don't binge over the bad feelings, I stay on plan.
I still look in the mirror and wonder who that fat lady is.
Not thinking about food all the time!

[imok160]

Well Day 12 and still here still working things out, still not always perfect but striving to stay on track.

Went to a party last night and stayed on plan, bingeing, but on plan, I allowed my self 3 rum and diet colas. I overate deviled eggs, cheese,ham slices, and parmesan cheese chips.Today I am feeling the effects of the alcohol; I am "starving" today.I have begun to think about food food food and what can I eat next, just like past behavior which were usually binges. I need to eat cleanly and get back into ketosis and lose the cravings.

I also forgot to list my actual weight from my Tues. weigh in---234---I regained 6 lbs over the christmas free for all. I hope to have at least a 4 pound loss when I weigh this coming Tues. morning. I feel thinner and my clothes feel looser so I know I have lost something. I am also keeping track of my measurements and will locate those numbers and post them also.

[imok160]

Well here it is Day 16(Jan 23) I think. I am feeling pretty good. I have been religiously recording my food counts and I have been really overeating every day, it is all on plan but ,way too much.The party really held me back and threw me out of ketosis for a couple days and made the cravings return. They are gone now, thank you ketosis.
I haven't really lost anything, I am weighing once a week(Tue.) and it is the same as last week!! I know I have had too many calories and too much salt to really lose. Weight 234. I have not started on the treadmill yet. I am also measuring and I am still the same!!! Maybe the whoooosh fairy lost my address.

Here are my Goals:
Stay on plan
Get moving
Get to onderland by May 23
Get into a size 12 by Aug.16

I may add some others but I think these will keep me on track.

[imok160]

I meant to be in a size 14 by Aug. 16, not a 12--I can't expect any miracles!

[imok160]

Decided to weigh this morning because I just felt bloated and fat and I am up 2 pounds!!!! I came into this woe with high hopes and the belief that if I stayed on plan I would lose weight(however slowly) but not gain!!! I was pretty broken up looking at the scale and checking it three or four times!!!
I never thought I would gain on this plan! I managed to pretty much maintain my weight while bingeing before.
Not feeling so good emotionally. I have not binged as I would have in the past, I am sticking to it. I am going to concentrate on lowering my calories and getting some walking done.
One ray of happiness is I feel so much better physically and I wake up with a clear head.

[imok160]

Resisted the urge to weigh this morning, I don't want to get on that roller -coaster,I will stick to once a week weigh in and if I have gained more weight on Tues.,I will really have to consider changeing my eating plan. I would not mind if I maintained but I am gaining and this is not good for my emotions.
I am starting the cla/gla combo and will start on treadmill today,I already take a multi.,calcium,vit D,b-12 and folic acid. I will record any exercise, I will not consider my normal weekend warrior house clean/and any other major jobs I can't do during the week as activities.I will have to take some probiotics as soon as I finish the antibiotic.

[imok160]

Well it's Sun. morning 6:30 am,I have been waking up early with my mind clear but have lots pain in my hip joints--this prevents me from sleeping in!
I don't know if this is from the "diet" or supplements or the antibiotics I have been taking, these are the only changes I have made other than the short time I was on treadmill and this pain has been there about a week.

I was very busy with heavy housework(cleaning out,organizing basement storage/christmas,carrying and lifting)yesterday.My calories were a little high at 1815 but I seemed to be having lots of cravings!

I resisted the urge to weigh this morning, I will wait until Tue. morning. I have bee n checking ketone strips at various times and they have all showed trace or small amounts---never dark purple,maybe if I exercise more I will get a darker color,I am happy with "trace or small" for now.

[imok160]

I started the cla/gla combo on 1/25, I remember DR Atkins recommending these supplements,and I found a thread on it, it may help the fat to not stick around!
I wanted to post my New Years resolutions so I will continue to work on them:
Get healthy/lose weight
Save more money.
Improve social life/keep closer touch with family and friends

[imok160]

Weight is 230, I guess I would say its a 2 lb loss, or if I consider my fatter fat day weight of 234, I would have a 4 lb loss in 20 days, not feeling real good, really thought there might be 7-8 lbs. in induction etc....well not for me, I need to find the sllloooooowwwwww loosers club I guess. I am still in it for the long haul because I do feel physically better and I know my calories were very high in the first couple weeks and I did not exercise so, deep down I know I could have lost more with a little more commitment to the plan. My joints are not feeling the best and my carpal tunnel is really bothering me at night, I do not know if this is the antibiotics that I took, the plan or the supplements I am taking.

I will measure and see if there is any difference.

I don't have big cravings but I do get them and I still very much want to eat large portions but, I am slowly getting this into normal potions.

[imok160]

Not Happy, decided to weigh this morning; 231, yep UP one pound boy that makes me so happy(NOT). TOM also so double crap!
I am figureing I have had a 3 pound loss in 25 days not good for the well being,really hoped to lose like two pounds a week!
I have kept my carbs under 20 and I have tried to keep my cals. around 1500,a couple days the cals. were over two thousand but the carbs were kept at 20, these were days I just had cravings! I have not cheated. I do not know why I can't even get under 230!
This new month I am going to stick to it,keep cals under 1500, and get walking!I will stay with the woe and see if this fat will go! I guess I am hoping for a whoosh or something, this is what's keepng me from falling of the plan.
I do not understand ,everyone else seems to have such wnderful results and I am stagnant.
I will weigh on Tue(my usual day) and hope the tom is not affecting my weight. I had high hopes but, losing hope.I will measure on Tues. also, I am not even going to bother today, it would probably just depress me more. I am taking a multi. vit., calcium, and the cla/gla combo.

[Tommyswife]

Congragulations on choosing better health. I can see it's been challenging. How are you doing?

[imok160]

I lost it this weekend, and it wasn't weight, it was my mind! I crashed big time! Sat it started with Red Lobster( rum, biscuits, breaded shrimp and then ice cream and cake) and Sun. it was tacos with the shell, ice cream, toast with peanut butter,pretzels,ice cream, giant blueberry muffin and maybe something I forgot! It was like a feeding frenzy or a addict looking for a fix!
I had thousands of calories and hundreds of carbs both days!I felt physically terrible and did not sleep, I am puffy and bloated this Monday morning!My head hurts, its like a terrible hangover. Why would I do this? I can only figure that I felt so bad about only losing a few pounds in three weeks that I just went on a binge. This is exactly the behavior that has gotten me this fat. I hope I can get over it and not let it happen again. I just want to cry this morning. Well I must get breakfast(strictly on plan) and get ready for work.I want to get back into ketosis as quickly as possible. I will not be weighing myself this Tues., there maybe weight gain and this will just make me feel worse at this time.

[imok160]

Well still trying to get back on track since the binge, I have been exactly on plan since Monday, I try to keep the carbs under 20 and the cals under 1500, except yesterday they were high but I was on plan so I am not going to sweat that! I am not really having any cravings so I would guess I am in ketosis(although keto sticks are not showing any color!). I need to drink more water. I need to get moving! I will weigh and measure tomorrow, I do not feel any thinner, my stomach maybe feels larger,just by the feel of my jeans. I sure hope I am not gaining weight on Atkins, because I do not know what I would do, this is the only plan that I have been able to stick to and not have continuous cravings! I am slowly getting my binges under control, a side effect from chronic dieting( hundreds of half-a$$ed attempts,stay on diet 2 or 3 days and then binge from feeling of being deprived, over and over) I have a mini library of diet books,and I have managed to gain and gain, I am the heaviest I have ever been in my life.
Reading the boards really gives me hope for myself.

[imok160]

Well I have been sticking on plan very well,although my calories some days are at 2000 and I don't think I will lose at this number. I have not been exercising and that needs to be done. I started the cla/gla combo a couple weeks ago and recently stopped because I think I was having some side effects; groggy in the morning ,tired in the afternoons, and spotting. I stopped the combo a few days ago and for two days I am up and alert in the moring. I will try the combo in a few days and see if that was it or if it was the natural peanut butter that was causing me problems.I stopped eating the peanut butter because I can't control my portions. I did start the coconut oil a few days ago and I think it makes me feel more energetic and maybe lose the cravings.I am using unrefined and it tastes like coconut which I like.
I Have not weighed because I was just becoming obbsessed and depressed about NO weight loss or 1 pound a week loss! OF COURSE IT WOULD NOT FALL OFF OF ME, LIFE STINKS! I will weigh and measure tomorrow(sat) as I forgot this morning and I have already had my breakfast.I do not feel any thinner in my clothes, I did feel kind of jiggly after I started taking the cla/gla combo but I doubt that really meant anything. If any thing my stomach may feel bigger as in my jeans feel like they are gouging my waist??
I do feel better and I am sleeping well.
I am back on the L-glutamine hoping to get my cravings and large portions under control, it does work if I take it.
My carbs are always under 20, except one day they were 26.

[Livywilltim-mom]

Stopping in to give you support and encouragement.
I hope you are pleasantly surprised tomorrow

Peace

[imok160]

Well I am still here and still learning. I don't get a lot of time to read and post on this site, I do read a few posts every day but I don't post much. Reading these boards really helps me feel like I am not alone in this effort and to know that it isn't always easy.
I don't really feel like I am making much progress, at this time i have lost about 4 pounds in 46 days,which really doesn't give me much hope.I have lost a few inches but I still want to cry. I am still wearing the same clothes and they don't feel much looser. I have read about women who started around the same time and they are down two or three sizes!!!!I have stayed on plan but my appetite has not diminished at all, I still eat way too much food and I know I use too much splenda and I do not drink enough water. I do not exercise much as I have not gotten that great burst of energy that I hear so many talking about and I feel so stressed so much of the time I just don't have the motivation to do it. I usually feel exhausted every evening during the week.
I did wake up this morning with sinus pain and I think it was a reaction to peanut butter as I had a tablespoon last night.

[imok160]

I just want to say thanks to those who have sent encouragement to me. It is appreciated.

[imok160]

Well another month almost gone, I don't know if I have made much progress. I am still on the plan but I am recovering from a two day carb/sugar binge!

Sun and Monday were not good. Bread,pretzels,Chinese,Rice, Macaroni and Cheese are just some of the high carb high sugar crap I ate! I look like crap also my face is blotchy,puffy and my eyes have giant bags under them! My nose is stuffy!I have gas!I have a slight headache.I have not weighed,I am not going to do that to my self, I am just getting right back (day two) on plan foods and forgetting about it! I will be on induction for a minimum of one week.I will weigh on Friday and measure and hope the after effects of the binge are gone.
I have made progress because before if I would have binged like this it would have went on for weeks or months instead I am right back on my woe. Those old habits are hard to break but it can and will happen! I know this plan works,It just will not happen overnight.