Debbie's Doings

[debbiedo]

How is that for a stupid name but what else should I call this journal?

I have been on this site for over 3 years but never wrote a journal. Maybe I will threadjack less if I have a place to write all my daily doings.

I guess for those who visit and don't know me I should tell you all about me.

I am almost 51( November 25th). I live in Maryland and have been here for 13 years. We always lived in Upstate NY before this but love Maryland even though is is far from the family we have left in Syracuse. This includes some aging parents which makes it a bit hard but this is where we are so we deal with it. I am a registered nurse and I work in the Emergency Room mostly in the fast track. I love my job but it is hectic work and the hours are long.

I have a wonderful, supportive husband. We just celebrated our 26th anniversary.

I also have 3 sons who all live in the area thankfully. My oldest is 25 and a teacher. He is unmarried and lives abour 25 minutes away.My second son is 23and moved back home about a year and half ago. He also brought his dog.( lucky us!!!) He is a chef. He does some cooking but not much more then once a week because he is working and gone or doesn't want to. My third son is
16.He is the one I most worry about because he is immature( probably my fault) and has learning issues.

I am a shorty. I am all of 5 feet tall. I have struggled with weight issues since my Freshman year in college. I think it is funny that I thought I was fat at 114pounds and now I would just like to be 114 pounds but I am not that far off.

I came to LCFs in April 2003 I when I started Atkins. I didn't weight myself at first but was around 150 pounds and the size 10's were getting tight. I lost some weight and felt good at around 125 pounds. I gained it back when I stopped counting carbs and ate freely. I may not have been eating sugar and cookies and lots off limit carbs but I was obviously eating too much.

In January of 2006 I decided to go back on Induction and went from around 136 to 122. Now this was on my old scale that I later found out was weighing me a good 6 pounds lighter then I really was. So I lost weight and it stopped there and I was still flabby. Now I exercise alot and it didn't matter I still had alot of body fat. I found info on Burn the Fat Feed the Muscle. I did this plan and lost weight very quickly and got back down to 112. I also started running. The more I ran the less I was lifting weights. I did stick with Pilates 2-3 times most weeks. I started gaining weight back when I stopped counting calories and started eating way too much again so approx 4 weeks ago I started cutting back and eating BFFM style. I refused to weigh myself at first so I don't know I high I was but I have obviously lost weight and I am now at 120 pounds. I was as low as 118 but went on vacation where I didn't diet and gained 3.6 pounds. So my goal is to get back to 115 if possible.


So this is where I am now in my diet life. There is far more going on on my life but I will stop here for my grand introduction to journaling.

I used to write in a journal way back when I was pregnant with first two kids. I wrote to them actually.

So I have some new goals . Number one is to lose 5 more pounds. Doesn't sound like much but is alot on a shorty. Number 2 is to learn to maintain my weight. Not sure how to do this because without tight control and anal retentiveness I gain weight.

So I will track my progress in losing the last 5 or so pounds and hopefully maintaining and sharing my life here and maybe I won't thread jack as I seem to do.

I know this is a low carb site but I do eat carbs. I am just careful as to how much and which carbs I eat. I do eat lower fat. I do eat 4-5 times a day most days. I try not to snack but to eat a small meal instead. This worked in the past. Speaking of eating I need some food and I need to go make chocolate chip brownies for a bake sale. I am good and can resist these things but if I eat even one I am gone.

[jgw]

I know you've been here a while, but Welcome to journaling.
Good luck
Jan

[debbiedo]

wow my first journal visitor. thanks for the welcome!

[debbiedo]

More of my life:

I have been having alot of back problems and sciatica the last few months. I have had back pain before but it always went away and it was never quite so bad.I had an MRI a few weeks ago and today I got the results. I have spinal stenosis and other lovely things going on with my back. I am trying to schedule an epidural but need to find a time the doctor can do it and my husband is around. Could have been tomorrow but he isn't available. My son is at work. My neighbor and friend isn't home to ask if she is working and most people are at work so now we are looking at next week.I can live with the pain I just want it gone. I want to be able to run well again and feel like myself again. You don't realize how bad you feel until you are painfree again. I was on Medrol dose pack and pain free and boy it was nice. I can deal with the pain.I just want it gone. So I am waiting for a phone call from the nurse with a time and I will be there.

What else is going on in my life?

My 90 year old MIL finally is moving out of her house but she lives 7 hours north. My husband got a frantic call last night and he is going up there with 2 of my kids Friday just to help get her organized. She isn't moving for over a month.

I am getting my house painted and carpeting changed and am trying to pick paint colors. I am not so great at this but my husband is thankfully.I am adding some color to a few walls. I am in the process of cleaning all the closets and rooms which is much needed.

I am running but not as many miles. I can't plan on any races until I feel better but I won't stop running at this time. I need it for my sanity.I have a wonderful network of friends I run with and often eat out with.

Life is good for me. My back isn't great but I am healthy and have a good marriage and great kids and the whole back thing is just a bump in the road. At least I have a reason for the pain I have had on and off for many years.

[jgw]

Debbiedo,
I wish I can run! I was thinking about joining a training class for runners this summer. I missed the deadline. I was looking at the news and the group I would have been with went to the Chicago Marathon and could not complete it. I think they stopped the race. Maybe I will join the training class and work to do this next year.
I hope your back feel better.
Jan

[debbiedo]

Janice are you a nurse too?? I just noticed the scrub jacket. My cousin lives in Chicago. I have never been there but hope to take trip with my aunt to visit her.

Most areas have running clubs. Check online for the Road Runners. Some running stores even have training programs. I love my club. They have beginning runners programs. I started by doing intervals on the elliptical and then moving to do them on the treadmill. I would walk a few minutes and then jog a minute and kept repeating until I was jogging all the time. Then I increased the speed some. I got brave and did a race and became hooked. I joined the club and started running with other people. I believe most people can run. It takes some training but I did it. My husband who has some extra pounds on him is running. It doesn't have to be fast. Get a good pair of running shoes at a running store. You may have a few near you. Check for a Fleet Feet.They are a national running store chain. There are many running stores. They are a good resource for local races and clubs too. My Fleet Feet even has training groups.

Let me know if I can help.

[jgw]

Yes I'm a nurse,
I will check out the training programs in my area. I have a treadmill at home and I can start training myself.
Thanks alot
Jan

[debbiedo]

Check Coolrunning.com. There is a program called couch to 5K.

[Tylar_Connar]

very interesting journal.

[jgw]

Thanks Debbiedo!

[seb]

Hi Debbie. Just here to cheer you on. I've been on LCF since 2002, but this year have really gotten serious about losing. Sounds like you have a lot going on in your life right now. Hope your DH and boys have a good trip to MIL's this weekend.

[Jackielbrown04]

Fellow shortie who knows what a pain those last 5 pounds are...you'll get there!

[debbiedo]

Thanks for dropping in on my journal.

Off to get my flank steak marinating. My son who is a chef just told me a new way to do it. Youngest just came home from school.

What a beautiful day here. I so wish I could run today but I have cut back and need to do what is best for me. Maybe DH will walk with me after dinner.

[debbiedo]

I gained 1.2 pounds over night. I know it is fluid. I did eat cookie dough yesterday and too much flank steak with dinner but not the amount of calories needed to gain 1.2 pounds.

Haircut today. Run tonight. I have little things to deal with at home that I keep putting off so better get that done too because I work tomorrow, Sunday and Monday. I am also picking up an extra 8 hours next week.

Eats so far today

1.75 cups Kashi Go Lean Cereal and some milk to wet it. Not much milk taken in so don't know how to count it in. I just round up the calories.

lunch will be my ground turkey, brown rice and spinach all premade.

snack will be apple and string cheese.

Dinner tonight after run will be at Tex Mex place so maybe fajitas or a salad.

So I weighed 121.6 today.I want to be 115 and the scale isn't going the right direction. can't let it ruin my day but need to be more careful today. Just had to like the mixing bowl yesterday. Love that chocolate chip cookie dough!!! I did resist the chocolate chip bar my son left sitting next to the computer last night and had an apple instead. Boy that thing was calling my name too.

[BeepBeep]

Wow Deb has a journal.

Your journal makes me think of "ahhhhhhh" like the big ole breath of fresh air and the step back into life that is not consumed by running. I'm SO glad you've returned to your feelings about your body to really touch on what you want to achieve. You had some unfinished business with your *approach* to life and not necessarily your WOE. Remember there are a lot of rigid folks here so I encourage you to be free and flexible and find that happy place in your mind while you seek to achieve your goals.

This is YOUR time! Running hiatuses (though I know you'll keep running like I did) are awesome times for self-reflection.

Enjoy! The timing of this journal is perfect.

kudos and bon voyage!!!!

[debbiedo]

Thanks Jen. I have to come to some place I can live with and not be obsessed with.I guess I will always be a little obsessed.

[BeepBeep]

Deb, I'll always be a little obsessed too. I'm sure that's why we get along so well, isn't it ! Just keep that little file folder in the back of your mind of where you don't want to be mentally. I swear that the times I start gaining it's not the restrictiveness per say that is the downfall its the whole approach to diet and exercise gets WAAAAAY too much and then I start asking myself if I'm vain, etc.

Vanity and obsession are not virtues, yes? I think your approach this time is lovely and you will prevail!!!

Your choices, your life, your happiness!

again, bon voyage!!! you'll do great!

[jgw]

Stopping by to say hello. I may be the steak you ate for the fluid. It'll come off.
Janice

[debbiedo]

If I weigh every day I will see ups and downs. I just have to deal with it. I have eaten well today. I have been on plan with the addition of a sugar free fudgesicle. I don't think I spelled that right. They are tasty,

I went to CVS and printed lots of vacation photos and put them in a small album so I can show them at work. I enlarged on I took of my three sons last week and one of my husband and me to give to him.

Got my hair cut today. Accomplished little else so I am off to do the mundane task of folding laundry. I run tonight. I will go with the slowest group. I did this Tuesday and ended up speeding up. I can run with pain just not like I used to.

Tomorrow I work.Only 8 hours so that is nice. 8 hours goes really fast when you are used to 12 hour shifts.

I am waiting from a call about the epidural I am supposed to get. The nurse hasn't been able to get me a time yet. I need to do it when I am off from work. I pray it works. I think it will because the oral steroids worked for a while.

I don't want back surgery!!!!

My son is home from school and wants the computer and I need to get some things done so this day isn't a total waste. I leave in about 90 minutes and it will fly by. Kids are having pizza because I don't feel like making anything tonight. Bad mom but I just don't feel like cooking.

[Jackielbrown04]

I think anyone who struggles with weight has to be a bit obsessed, and someone short who struggles has it even worse IMO Lol...just kidding, but I know being short does make things a bit harder. You are eating well and exercising- those few pounds will come off in good time

Hope you have a good run tonight and that your shift goes fast tomorrow. How many hours do you work a week?

[BeepBeep]

Mnnnnn steak.

that's all I have to say right now.

well I guess if your son needs to get on the CPU...

I don't know how you prepare full dinners all the time. I'd totally do pizza if I were tired and/or out of ideas.

look at what a hit your journal is already!
we just need Taters to come in here ... and some shirtless men...

I read something interesting in Fitness magazine today while I was waiting for something and it was so interesting I forgot what it was. I thought of you though, so when I remember I'll post it.

good news your shift is short tomorrow!

Janice you're a total cutie!

Jackie shorties are cute. They always get the cute guys.

[Jackielbrown04]

Originally Posted by MaintainLC4me

Jackie shorties are cute. They always get the cute guys.

Yeah, I found a keeper

[debbiedo]

Before you know it Janice will be a runner too!!

Jen is that you in that avi because you are skinny and have great muscle definition too.

Jackie, I work around 32 hours a week. Sometimes I do 40. Next week I am doing 40. The following weeks I am taking 4 hours off to go to races on Sundays. Good thing I have that flexibility.

My weight today is 119.6. So I dropped 2 pounds from yesterday. I think I am still retaining some fluid too.

My run was great. I had the usual thigh crap but that is something I can live with when I run slow. I did just under 11 minute mile pace so very easy pace and we did 4.78 miles.

I had salmon, small salad and some brocolli for dinner. I resisted the tortilla chips and salsa. I can't even have one or am gone and eat them all.

I leave for work at 10:15am. Better read all my email, pay may bills, eat some breakfast, pack up lunch and a snack and get to the bank.

My husband has to travel to Syracuse to help his mom this weekend. She is 90. Her move is stressing her. She can't even begin to handle this without alot of help. My BIL can't go this weekend so my husband and oldest are making the trip. Hopefully my BIL can get there over the next few weekends too. There are 52 years of things to go through and mostly get rid of. She needs new furnature to fit her new place. I am glad I am not really involved. Moving totally stresses me too.

Thanks to all who visit me here. Life has alot of mundane moments but I share them.

I am trying to decide if racing knowing my pace will be slower is something I want to do. I also wonder if I will push harder then I should and pay the price after. I run with lots of people with back problems. I don't see it stopping my friend Sunny from PRing at the Steamtown marathon with a 4:01 time at age 51. Maybe her stenosis isn't as bad. I guess I can't compare myself to others and have to do what is best for me.

Eating today;

Breakfast: Oatmeal( 1 cup cooked) and cottage cheese( 1/2 c)
snack: apple and string cheese
Lunch: ground turkey, brown rice( 1/2 c) and spinach
Dinner: lamb chops( 2 ) and what ever they cook while I am at work. Probably salad and maybe sweet potato.

Sounds healthy!!!!

[BeepBeep]

Deb, your eats are SO healthy... wow... you're a saint...

we have similar schedules Deb!

yes don't compare yourself to others with running. that's the quickest way to disappointment and feelings of inadequacy. i used to do that with other faster women in the local running club but why? it's like self-torture.

UGH i am starving today. TOM is coming... should be here in about 2-3 days.

your hubby sounds like a very nice person. i wonder if brad would do something that nice for a little old lady! perhaps.

so this is totally morbid but we were talking about health care directives last night. i'm going to write mine this weekend. HOW MORBID! but you know what it's gotta get done... do you talk about this stuff at all at work deb?

in HAPPY news... another day of work and probably at coffee shop if i can get the desktop fixed then it's at home which is less productive. i have a light run today... enjoy your day DEB!!

[debbiedo]

Jen, we don't have advanced directives. I know I should know better. We don't even have wills which is even worse.

TOM done for the month here. Wish it was done forever. I guess getting it is good because I still have those hormones. Once they are gone lots of other problems like bone loss.

You know what scares me most about my back is what will be as I get older.

I told my mom about my back and as her normal form she told me about her back and then told me I shouldn't be running. She can't believe the doctor says it is OK. This doctor believes the damage is done. He says I can do what ever I can tolerate. If I want to run with pain then run. Of course my mom told me she has bone on bone. I hope it isn't that bad for her. Bone on Bone sounds like she couldn't move and she does. She plays lots of golf and walks and plays tennis.

MOMS!!!

Could go on and on about them.

Better get my bills paid and get to work. They are orienting lots of new people so I will not be where I like. I hope I am not in the psych ER like Monday with an incontinent autistic huge 19 year old. That really killed me that day. I usually don't do too much heavy work. Mostly it is meds, assessing and teaching with some blood work and IV's thrown in and lots of charting!

[jgw]

Thanks MaintainLC4me for that compliment.
So are you!
I hope all of you have a great weekend.
Janice