Nkechi's Testimony and Confessions (I am gonna do this! For REAL this time.)

[Lulu Belle]

234!! Great Job!! It's good to hear that the muscles are not as sore. It does get easier. Good, good , good!

[123Nkechi]

Originally Posted by Lulu Belle

234!! Great Job!! It's good to hear that the muscles are not as sore. It does get easier. Good, good , good!

Thanks girl !

[123Nkechi]

I was in an all day training all day today so I have social work stuff on the brain . It started at 8:30 this morning and I didn't get to eat breakfast. Ended up eating low carb junk during the break. At least I stayed legal. Went to workout afterwards and I think I am ready to increase my weights for the back exercise and include more bicep curls . It's been a good but busy day.

Today's Menu

B - Skipped
S - BBQ Pork Skins and Diet Pepsi - 0 carbs
L - Zaxby's Grilled Salad w/Ranch Dressing - 10 carbs
S - Teriaki Beef Jerky (post workout) - 3 carbs
D - Salmon and Broccoli florets - 5 carbs

Dang - That's only 18 carbs! Planning to add another snack of cream cheese and DaVinci's. May add some nuts and that will bring me up to about 7 carbs. So my total carbs for today will be 25 carbs.

Affirmation of the Day:

My future's so bright, I gotta wear shades (I know it's corny but as long as I believe it, it's true!)

[Lulu Belle]

I love this song!! It's not corny at all if you just take the words at face value and not twang the song. You don't think it's ok if your carbs are low on occasion?? Why??



Just keep swimming, swimming , swimming.

[123Nkechi]

Originally Posted by Lulu Belle

I love this song!! It's not corny at all if you just take the words at face value and not twang the song. You don't think it's ok if your carbs are low on occasion?? Why??



Just keep swimming, swimming , swimming.

I don't mind at all. I just have this fear of being hungry and passing out! Just kidding . I want to make sure I get enough calories and I guess the hunger part too . I don't want my body to get used to anything that I am not going to do for a lifetime. I already know that I am never going to go over 150 ever (or 30 carbs per meal) in maintainence due to my insulin resistance. I have been noticing that I tend not to eat as much on the weightlifting days. To bad I can't do it every day.

[Lulu Belle]

Thanks for the explanation! it's really great that you have a long term plan in mind , that's super smart. That's how i screwed up the first time i lc'd. I inducted about 5 months and then did a half butt job of maintaining without ever really climbing the ladder slowly. I was just really careful for a long time and then it just slowly went to crap, and viola', 35 pounds, back on . It's a good lesson to learn to be prepared for the long ride.

[123Nkechi]

I was running late this morning and was only able to grab a bottle of water and the half bag of Teriaki Beef Jerky so that was breakfast. Just refilled the bottle of water and added a packet of Lipton. I have a meeting at 1pm so that means I have to take my lunch exactly at noon which is okay because I usually just go get something and bring it back to the office anyway. I will work through lunch so I can leave early and go workout. I should start working out at lunch but I have this phobia about sweating and being around people (think they may smell me ). Just wouldn't feel comfortable so I save it for the afternoon. I can't wait until they remodel the shower area so I can work out first thing in the morning. But that would mean getting up early and I am a little lazy . I really need to work on that - lol.

Affirmation of the Day :

Lord I need YOU, I really need YOU! I recognize that I can't make it without YOU.

[Lulu Belle]

I don't blame you, there is no way i'm getting up at 4am to work out before work. Forgedabodit!!!! You'll find a schedule that works well for you as time goes on!!

[123Nkechi]

Okay I ate crap today...

B - Teriaki Beef Jerky - 5 Carbs
S - Lipton Green Tea To Go, Cherry Blossom flavor - 0 Carbs (some people say 2 though)
L - The usual: Zaxby's - 10 Carbs
S - a little Pork Rinds, a hotdog (no bun, jsut the dog), and the rest of the cream cheese and DaVinci's and Macadamia dessert I made last night - 5 Carbs
D - 1/2 Fried Chicken breast and California Mix Veggies - 15 Carbs

Total Carbs for the Day: 35 Carbs...Not bad for eating junk

I didn't workout today . Started to go do some cardio on the treadmill or the bike but changed mind at the last minute. I probably should have because it is proving to be to my benefit since I eat better on those days. May do some squats before I get in the bed like I did last night (only did 8 though). I am going to boil some eggs so that I will have them for breakfast for the weekend. May add some tuna to the mix as well. Like my girl Jodi says, "Fail to Plan, Plan to Fail"! I know the weekends are tough so I really need to work on making some more changes. I have my veggies ready for my scrambled eggs in the morning.

Confession Time :

I have not been taking my Metformin like I should. I should know better than to skip my Met because it has been doing a good job regulating my cycle. I have been forgeting to take it in the morning and then doing a double dose in the evening (sometimes forgeting and just doing one dose ). It doesn't effect me much since it's extended release formula but I don't know what kind of benefit it is giving me as far as my cycle goes. I still haven't seen TOM and that is probably why. I have ALL of the PMS symptoms but no TOM. In the past, I have gone as long as 2 weeks feeling like this and at it's worst I am miserable. This time the symptoms are not bad and I think it's because I'm working out. Maybe TOM will show up this weekend and I won't feel as bloated and emotional.

[Lulu Belle]

I honestly know how you feel. Weeks of thinking "this feels like pms, i think.....". It truely stinks..... Don't hurt any innocent people! Sorry , i couldn't resist.

[123Nkechi]

I am glad you feel my pain. I can actually feel myself getting an attitude for no reason - lol.

[123Nkechi]

Got on the scale this morning despite feeling PMSish and TA DA 233 lbs! I lost another pound!

Was running late again this morning so I didn't get breakfast again . I am seriously considering going to buy something but I don't know what. May go to the grocery store across the street and see what they have. Don't want to get out of the car though so I really need to think about this. Not in the mood for bacon and eggs today but that is my safest choice. I'll figure something out.

It's the receptionist's last day at work and we are taking her out to lunch so I am going have to really plan that out too. I have to look at the menu online before we go.

I am seriously considering the BFL program. I am going to talk to the trainer today to see what he thinks. It's time for me to take things to the next level. I have been reading the book and I can use fruit as my carb choice for meals. I think that is a lower carb choice that potatoes so I am going to crunch the number this weekend. I also am going to have to figure out how I'm going to get in 6 meals but I may just do 5 (or 3 meals and 2 snacks).

Affirmation of the Day (Weekend) :

I practice total wellness - mentally, physically, and spiritually
If I am eating well then I am treating myself well
If I exercise then I am treating myself well
If I pray and in touch with my spirituality then I am treating myself well

[123Nkechi]

Lunch was a disaster! Ended up ordering the seafood platter with FRIED flounder, shrimp, and oysters. It came with a salad (and a honey buttered croissant) and steamed veggies. Ate about half with about a gallon of splenda sweetened lemonade and now I have a headache. DARN IT ! Can only blame myself though. That's what I get for skipping breakfast...

[Lulu Belle]

Ok , lunch sounds delicious, but BAD. Dust yourself off and begin again. Don't you find whenever you are seeing success (another pound gone!!), you then go and frig it up?? Is it psychological? Do we think "i'm going good, i'm going to have a treat?"

I must warn you - i've made a frozen dessert for the family, and i'm kickin my butt, cause i know i'm going to want some...... see, not planning for ME>>>>>

Take it easy!!

[123Nkechi]

I KNOW!!! Why do we do these things to ourselves? It is mental and I do know better. I'm going out with friends tonight and the "plan" is to keep it meat and veggies. I also have a birthday get-together tomorrow. The weekends are the worst when it comes to dieting. Oh well...I will share all the dirty details later.

[Lulu Belle]

Good luck at your party. I KNOW your going there thinking " i will not have cake". I hope you succeed!! it's hard.

[123Nkechi]

Yes it is hard! I will spare you all the gory details . Had to go to church and repent for the weekend of carbs among other things - lol . I actually didn't do that bad other than the cake .

I was thinking about starting BFL this week but I know know that I am not ready to commit yet. I am going to wait until I finish the book and learn the exercises before I officially start. I have been reading the BFL book and it said that you should have a carb and protein and a veggie to make a full meal. According to the plan, yogurt and fruit can be counted as your carb so I am going to use them instead of the starches like potatoes, bread, and rice. I also have some low carb wraps so I may use them sometimes also. I figured this will keep my carbs lower.

I went shopping after church and got some more yogurt and frozen fruit to start incorporating in my diet in preparation for BFL. I got the plain yogurt because a half a cup is only 6 carbs and I figured I could add DaVinci's to give it flavor (maybe some fruit). I got the frozen berries to make low carb smoothies. One strawberry is only 1 carb so if I use 5 and organic soy milk which also has 5 carbs (4 from fiber so that is really like 1 carb if you count only the net).

I know there are some people that are so strict on their carb intake and want to see the scale move down everyday. I am not one of those people. I am about quality of life first. I have tried to do the M/E or K/E and I don't see how people can go for so long without eating veggies. If I am going to cut something out of my diet then it needs to be for the long haul because once you go back to it, then it is harder to manage those impulses to overeat. When I first joined this site, I was looking for info on the Kimkins diet and a jumpstart to my weightloss endevours. After trying it and reading all of the threads about various diets. I really began to assess what weightloss is all about and my motivations for losing this gut. For me it is about being healthy and well: MIND, BODY, and SOUL. I don't do emotional eating like some people do (I actually lose my appetite when I am upset) and if anything I am an impulsive eater. I am usually halfway finished with the 2nd or 3rd bit before I figure out that I shouldn't be eating something . I am still in the process of learning what behaviors I have that are barriers to my weightloss efforts. I do know that laziness, procrastination, and impulsive eating are some of them. Professionally I know that you have to deal with the behaviors and motivations behind them if you want to solve a problem. There are so many people that lose weight then transfer their unhealthy behaviors to something new. For example, some people lose weight and end up replacing their obsession with food for other addictive behaviors that are not healthy such as drugs, alcohol, gambling, ED, shopping and the list can go on and on. So I have decided that for me to be successful, then I have to deal with these behaviors. It is my only option for long-term success...

Affirmation of the Day :

Lord grant me WISDOM; for it is the vehicle that will take me where ever I want to go in life

[Lulu Belle]

That BFL plan sounds sensible. Even dedicated lowcarbers know you can't cut out all carbs for ever. And that KIMKINS sounds crazy to me. I'd be reading posts and people are posting menu's with 4 and 500 cals for a entire day. I'm thinking , YEA< this is not healthy. Hopefully BFL will be the winning plan for you.

One question, does atoning for your eating sins at church help??
Just wondering cause i usually just pray for patience and guidance, never thought of carb creep prayers!!

[123Nkechi]

I was just kidding about carb repentance - lol. Seriously though, I would say that praying for patience and guidance in every area of life could include diet. I am striving to be the best person I can be and that means taking good care of myself (and not eating 2 pieces of cake and fried foods and forgetting to take my medicine ). Of course I don't stress over the mistakes I just keep going. I'm only human and can only do the best I can and admit when I am wrong. That is what my journal is about. Being truthful about this process and learning myself and what is good for me. The bonus is that it also shows that losing weight and making life changes is not as easy as some people think.

TOM is here, FINALLY , and I now have an excuse for my bad behavior . I always crave greasy and creamy foods when TOM is coming. Well at least my mood will improve. This have been a very interesting weekend to say the least. I will update on the weekend's events in the morning. Until then...

[Lulu Belle]

You also have a reason not to weigh for a while cause you know you won't like what the time of month scale has to say. Just keep working your plan, and when tom is gone you may have a nice scale surprise waiting for you!!

[123Nkechi]

Today has been a busy day...

The weekend was eventful: I ate too much, spent too much money and almost burnt the house down !

I already told on myself about my eating habits this weekend but I left out that I left a pot of beans cooking on the stove and went to the mall . I THOUGHT I cut the stove off but evidently I left it on low and the pot burned up! The house was all smoky and now everything smells like smoke . I have been spraying deodorizor and washing clothes to get rid of the smell. It now smells like an old cigar bar .

Since TOM is in town, I have been really tired and I have a headache. It does not help that it is hot and humid out. Not feeling like doing much of anything other than going to bed early. I still haven't decided if I'm working out or not. I really don't want to change my routine but I feel so BLAH . I really need some motivation right now.

Affirmation of the WEEK :

See Sunday's Affirmation

[123Nkechi]

Affirmation of the WEEK :

Lord grant me WISDOM; for it is the vehicle that will take me where ever I want to go in life

I decided to start with the affirmations to keep me on track mentally...

I have been praying about my bad habits and the things that I need to change in my life. I was thinking of how in school they say that it takes 21 repetitions for an activity to become a habit. So that means I need to do something 21 times to break my bad habits. This means that if I am good with my eating and exercising daily for 3 weeks then it should become a habit. IF (and that is a big 'if' because I don't even know if I have a plan yet) I start today to attempt to adopt a healthy eating and weightloss plan with no cheats and no breaks for the next 21 days I should have a positive, healthy habit that will last me a lifetime (hopefully). The way I see it, if I start as soon as TOM leaves, then I by the time TOM comes around again I should be better prepared to handle the effects. I am going to have to think about how I am going to approach this. I already know that I can't follow the haphazard plan that I have been doing for the past few weeks. Let me think about it and get back later...

[Lulu Belle]

Originally Posted by 123Nkechi

Today has been a busy day...

The weekend was eventful: I ate too much, spent too much money and almost burnt the house down !


See Sunday's Affirmation

:h yst:

I must apoligize, i read this and literally laughed out loud. Best laugh i had today. Thanks and sorry!!!

I'm sure it really does stink, especially beans. Personally they do not agree with my tumtum.

You are so right, it does take awhile for a habit to take hold, it's just getting to that point that is hard. I find it hard to be vigilant about my eating plan. The first time i did atkins, i gave it two full honest weeks of perfect clean eating. And i was so pleased with the results that i kept it up for 6 months, and maintained for the better part of a year. It seemed so simple the first time and now i think i know too many cheats, or something foolish like that. I think we need our brains fixed .