Squishy's history

[Squishy]

I have always been significantly overweight so that was pretty much normal. When I was 12 or 13, I had problems with my blood sugar. I got tested by a specialist with glucose tolerance tests and having the results baffle the doctors. A specialist from Harvard was flown to review my results. They were mystified. My blood sugar would spike drastically initially and then my GC would crash severely and level out at amazingly low numbers for a substantial period of time. Normal results would see a spike and then a decrease in blood glucose over time.

I remember the doctor telling my mother that I was obese and I needed to lose weight so my insulin could go back to normal. In spite of being athletic I was still obese. The doctors said I just needed to "push away from the dinner table sooner". This just set the perfect storm into motion.

My parents just nagged on me more about not eating so much until I was actually only eating a school lunch. My dad's favorite name for me was chubbs and to refer to me as "gobula" which was short for for gobulas of fat.

So pretty much my "diet" growing up was now mired in self esteem issues. I wasn't gaining as much weight then, but I was still gaining. By the time I graduated I was a size 16. I was having maybe 3-6 periods a year by then and every once in a while one was particularly bad with cramping etc. I had all the symptoms of PCOS but was still undiagnosed.

Back then, things were a little different and about the worst thing that could happen to you, was you got herpes or you got pregnant so there wasnt much in the way of practicing safe sex against STD's. There wasnt as much pressure to see GYNs that there is now.

Because I was fat I never had much in the way of a steady boyfriend. I was sexually active but never with a steady partner so my need for BCPs was low. Yeah, I was a little slutty. I was the fat girl with self esteem problems, of course I was an easy mark Even though I was pretty promiscuous, I never practiced any methods of birth control, but I also never got pregnant. I was pretty happy go lucky about that and it was fine with me. I lived under the whole "dont look a gift horse in the mouth" thing.

In 1994 I met the guy who'd be my first boyfriend (on a online game of course). By 1996 we decided to take things into real life. I made the decision that I would do the right thing and get on birth control. 1997 we met and I was now on BCPs. I had complained to my doctor several times about the weight gain but their response was always "eat healthier". Well, when you're eating not much in the first place, "eat healthier" isnt always the right answer. I was put on phen/fen which helped me loose 45lbs but of course, you dont keep that weight off when you stop taking the pills. I also started displaying hirituism.

Luckily for me, my division was was sold to another company and my insurance changed in 1999. I now had a new doctor who immediately recognized my symptoms as being PCOS and ordered the blood tests, the ultrasound to check my ovaries. We agreed to try the Magnesium/Calcium/B12 therapy for the prevention of cramping. The ultrasound confirmed PCOS diagnosis.

Because my doctor was taking part in a medical study in Georgetown Medical School on low carb eating as a solution for insuline resistance she highly recommended atkins to me. I took her up on that.

While I was initially successful in losing during induction, I slammed to a screeching halt and remained for 7 months. Sometimes, fate has a way of taking care of a person. Who knows. My boyfriend and I broke up and because i had no use of the BCPs any longer, I stopped taking them with my doctor's permission. My weight started dropping again until I hit another plateau that actually turned into a stall. (anything over 6 weeks is considered a stall in my book. anything under is a plateau). It was then that my doctor decided we would give glucophage a try. 2 weeks later, I had dropped another 10lbs.

By this time, I had become obsessed with losing weight and my meals got steadily smaller and smaller until finally I had stalled out completely. My division was sold again for the 3rd time and my health insurance changed to a plan which was no longer carried by doctor. I was now 43lbs down and found what had worked until I stalled myself out by NOT eating.

My new doctor couldn't be arsed to continue with the glucophage therapy and I admit, after not eating much for several months, I couldn't be either. I slowly went back to eating my same old destructive way of carby poison and slowly gaining a lb or 2 here and there.

My biggest wake up has been in the last year where my weight has really ballooned up and I managed to gain 70lbs in the past few months.