A Diamond in the Rough -- Candy's Journey

[Edwards20]

This one is just another shot in front of the tank, but you can see the whale better (and YES, I mean the one in the tank).

[Edwards20]

This one is at the table during the ball. Hannah was tired and was ticked off because everyone kept taking her picture.

[Edwards20]

This is just my little lady.She had to wear Granny's pocket book.

[Edwards20]

Here are the inlaws.

[Edwards20]

And lastly, here is Hannah dancing with her "Buddy" at the Buffet Party.

[KimmerJ]

Candy they are beautiful pictures!!! em!!

[Edwards20]

I am thinking of cropping myself out of one and changing my avi.
Ok, I did .. but it is blurry. Still it doesn't show all of my chins, so I think I will keep it for now.

[monet0329]

This Mel girly is pretty smart for a youngin.. .. thats why I to her..

what ever you chose.. we are all here for you.. no hiding away!!.. I've been feeling that was here lately.. and like I said in my journal.. if I do that.. I will Loose.. and not in the good way.. so head up.. smile.. the new Avi is just beautiful.. I can tell you've lost in the face.. there are no multiple chins like you said before..( not that I saw any to begin with )


anywho.. don't leave us.. we lub ya.. and we are here for you..

[Sadler_Girl]

You look great I love all the pics!

[Mel78]

I can't see the pics cause I'm at work and they're blocking the picture hosting sites ... but, I can see your avitar and it's absolutely georgous!!! You look very stunning and elegant!!! Love your hair too

You are waaaaay too hard on yourself... ... You need to give great credit where credit is deserved and you can definitely see a difference in the previous pic and this one!!! You are here and you are ready to fight this battle and start on the journey again!!! We all have detours... it's getting back on the main road and continuing along that really matters!!! You are in great company for that...

Hope your day gets better!!!

[Edwards20]

Thanks to all for your encouragement and support. My Gutter Girls have pulled me out of the gutter today and I needed it bad. I was on a pity party that was not necessary. There are others hurting physically and emotionally just as bad as myself, and some perhaps worse.

I was very unproductive at work today. However, I looked around and no one else was working at all. I ate horribly, I am sure some skinny girl posted somewhere about her fat co-worker complaining about not losing weight and then posted my menu. Oh well, today I just didn't care about anything.

But, I feel so much better. I am excited to join the 30lbs in 3 month challenge. I am posting a starting weight of 247 which sux, but is the truth.
Sad since at one point this week the scale said 239.

Perhaps I was unproductive in my career today, but I feel very productive in my life. I have reached a decision and I am going to stick with it. I can do this. I know my DH will support me if I ever see him again ........

And I know my friends here are the best!! I love each and every one of you.

[Edwards20]

20lbs loss


I actually think in the last one my face looks wider, but one of my chins is gone. In the first one I am sitting, and the 2nd one I am standing and the angle is a little different.

[monet0329]

CANDY GIRL.. you need a whippin.. stop being so harsh on yourself!!.. you look absolutely beautiful..!!.. love the outfit.. its so hard to fond nice dress clothes when your heavy..so.. one of two things is going on here.. you either found a great place to shop..( if so.. do share) .. or your not as big as you THINK you are !!!!!..

your dd is just a cutie pie!! and dh is a hotty.. go girl!!.. shhh.. don't tell him.. his head may swell..

the whole picture is just way too cool.. looks like you all had a great time .. good for you!

[monet0329]

Originally Posted by Edwards20

20lbs loss


I actually think in the last one my face looks wider, but one of my chins is gone. In the first one I am sitting, and the 2nd one I am standing and the angle is a little different.

BIG BIG HUGE difference.. ..

[Sadler_Girl]

Originally Posted by Edwards20

20lbs loss


I actually think in the last one my face looks wider, but one of my chins is gone. In the first one I am sitting, and the 2nd one I am standing and the angle is a little different.

I can sooo see the diffrence

[Mel78]

Candy ... You are so incredibly hard on yourself and that makes me soooo sad. I know there are a lot of "proceses" we have to go through to make ourselves determined enough to get this to stick in our heads and to know that there truly is no other option for us... I was there about 15 months ago. I had the hugest amount of self-loathing and self-hatred that any person could have... I torchered myself with disgusting comments about myself to everyone that would listen and talked about how disgusted I was with myself... But, at that lowest place in my life... is where I found the strength to do something about it all. It was a huge revelation that made me realize that I was worth something in this world... It was a feeling that I can't really describe, but only someone that has been there knows...

I know you weren't around last year when we started the Making A More Fabulous Me challenge group... but the whole reason behind the challenge was to focus on improving not only our weight issues, but on improving our self-image, self-confidence and to end the self-hating... For a lot of us in the group (myself included) it was taking steps to stop the self-hating comments... Like, learning to take a compliment... or to stop downplaying successes and strides forward...and to be more understanding with ourselves when we tripped up... but to also realize we are worth the extra effort to make this dream come true. The biggest part of the group we had/have together is that we are all working on our self-confidence/self-image/self-acceptance issues. We have all been to the point where anytime anyone says something positive about us, we fire back with a negative... Even if we recognize progress ourselves, it was done with a back-slap to ourselves...

I think many of the ladies will agree that the self affirmation and efforts to make ourselves understand that we ARE awesome and we ARE worth all of this has been a hard journey (sometimes harder than the weightloss/dieting)... but it has helped us to feel more alive and happy and confident!!!

You are a beautiful woman with a beautiful family. I hope that you will always know you have a tremendous support circle of friends here and that we're ALWAYS going to be here for you through this journey!!!

to you!!!

[Low Carb Mommy]

Originally Posted by Edwards20

20lbs loss


I actually think in the last one my face looks wider, but one of my chins is gone. In the first one I am sitting, and the 2nd one I am standing and the angle is a little different.

I can see a big difference girl! Plus, you are smiling bigger in the second picture, so your cheeks are what are making it look wider to you. You are smiling bigger because you look and feel better already. Keep up the good work you are doing. Before you know it there will be a third picture there to say WOW at!!

[monet0329]

Good morning Candy Girl..

This Mel continues to amaze me with her words.. for such a young lady.. she always makes me tear up.. .. she is right ya know.. we both need to stop this bad talking that we do... what do ya say? from now on.. we are nothing but beautiful... ..

lets see who can go the longest with praises instead of being so down.. ??

sounds like a plan to me....

also.. I saw where you wanted some help with your pictures.. any time you need anything just yell.. I don't know how much I can help.. but I will sure try ok.. ..

you have a great day..

[losin4good1980]

Hey Candy - thanks for stopping by my journal - I love your new avi and WOW what a difference in your before and after - 20 lbs really does make a difference - you are doing great - KUTGW and I'll be seeing all of you on Monday I got my WW stuff in the mail today so - YIPPEEE!!! LOL I'm feeling like a heffer lately (put on 10 lbs since I stopped Atkins) but ah well - it's all gonna come off me xoxo

[Tippy Toes]

Hi Candy! Peeking in... Wow, what a difference in your face!

May I suggest something? Pick a plan and start. It will renew your faith in yourself. Plan menus ahead so work is no temptations for choices. Just look at the difference in your pics already for inspiration! And yes, Candy, if you think positive thoughts about what you are doing and what you CAN do, you will get what you want. No more bashing... Time for a Candy success story--I see that girl coming out!

[heidi21062]

Hey Candy!

I love the pics - you have a beautiful family!

WOWZA!!! I can really see a difference in your side-by-side pictures! You are doing great!!!!

[Tylar_Connar]

Candy!! You look GREAT. You can so see a difference. And you have a GREAT looking family. Beatufil little girl!!

[Tylar_Connar]

[Edwards20]

Thank you ALL. I have just now read all the encouraging comments. It made me stop and think ....... wow, these girls took TIME to write all this. It wasn't a quick stopping in and saying hello. That makes me feel GREAT.

I shared all of these comments with DH this morning. He is cracking up. He said he said -- "I have been trying to tell you this for years, guess it is gonna take some people on the internet to tell you that, huh ?".

He is such a wonderful man, and yes Monet, he is a "hottie", I question God everyday on how I could be so blessed.

Perhaps it was my "humble" upbringing and my spiritual belief that we are "nothing" without Christ, that has given me low self-esteem. I don't think low self-esteem is what God intended. I do have Christ, and I am something. I am a Diamond in the rough, but I am a child of God. I have wonderful friends and I have the best family that God could ever give me. Being "fat" should not take away from those feelings, but as a human being it often does. And being "skinny" should not add to those feelings, although as a human it will.

Perhaps it is the world/society outside of my family and LCF that places so much emphasis on "looks" as a value of self image.

I will try to work on my self-image and self worth. I make no promises to do this overnight.

[Tylar_Connar]

CAndy, you are a GREAT person with a very kind HEART!! Do not let your weight hold you back from you dreams. I know I have. ANd I know it has lowered my self worth...but I am working on it as well.