Pri17cess72 Journaling her way to being fit and healthy

[pri17cess72]

This is my first post in my journal. Today is Dec 26, 2006. weight 185.6lbs

I have done Atkins several times in my life the first time was when my Dad passed away in 2002. I stayed on Atkins for 6 weeks and lost 17-20lbs. I felt great and was happy with my success. I was 24 years old at the time.

I continued to do a modified low carb diet until about Dec 2005. I gave up and put on all the weight I lost.
It was a stressful time in my life, my livein boyfriend of 3 years broke up with me. He got another job 100 miles away. I decided to follow him and moved up with him shortly after he moved out of my apt and up to his own apt 100 miles away. One month to the day I moved in with him, he broke up with me. I proceded to live with him for about 4 months after he dumped me and fell into a lot of depression.

I finally got the courage to move back down to my home town in Jan 2005.

I met a new guy he seemed like a dream. dont they always? Anyway I found out that he has a lot of skeletons in his closet and he has done some serious deceitful things to me.
Obviously with my low self esteem I did not break up with him and continue to date him and live with him.

He is not dealing with SAD seasonal affective disorder and it is taking its toll on me as well.

I have a brother, who is a doctor, abusing prescription med. I am currently working on putting him in a rehab.

I hope and pray that 2007 will be a better year than 2006.

My goals for 2007:

1. To feel good about myself and be emotionally healthy. To regain my self esteem.
2. To be a better sister to my brothers and a better daughter to my mother. To spend more time with family.
3. To lose weight so that I can feel better and know that I can do this. I have failed at weight loss so many times. I hope to be 150lbs by 4.15.07.

I will write in my journal as often as I can and hopefully I will look back at where I can from and celebrate the success of where I am.

Today is a new day and I had my breakfast of 2 poached eggs and 3 slices of ham. I ate so bad the last week and had plenty of sugar cookies and cake. I have paid the price with serious diarreah.

Will post often and I know I can do this!!

[pri17cess72]

I totally blew it. I did not have any carb friendly food in the house and after I ate my eggs and ham for breakfast, I spotted some left over sugar cookies from Christmas. I ate the last two. Thinking "now I can start...no more goodies in the house."

I went to the grocery store and saw they had just put out a loaf of fresh baked warm french bread. I bought it and even took a bite while I was at the store. Then DF bought it's it ice cream bars and taffy cookies. I ate an its it and about 6 cookies. I feel so sick now.

I cant eat like this. I cant. I need to get back on track and do this. I also need to start to exercise.

[chloe2t]

Hi Princess. I'm sorry you feel bad. BUT... it does not anything but that you made a mistake. Don't give up even though it gets hard.

I cheated on Christmas Day, and feel very bad about that, but I am right back on track. I do take this WOE seriously, and I simply fell weak for the moment.

Sometimes when we make a mistake, it becomes easier to just keep doing it. When I did atkins the first time, i went over a year without cheating, then fell off the wagon. Then I crashed the wagon, burned the wagon, and buried the ashes....

but anyway, dust yourself off so you can get back on track. I know you are strong enough and smart enough, and I definitely know you CAN!

and even though I don't know you very well yet, I'd like to. I think it is fantastic that you have made the awesome decision to do this, it means that you are finally loving yourself enough to do this. Just don't give up.

[pri17cess72]

12.27.06 today I weigh 186.6. Must have been all the cookies and ice cream. I still feel sick and bloated from my binge.

Thanks for the words of encouragement Chloe2t. I appreciate them.

Today is a new day and I will start fresh and on track.

[islesgirl]

Okay if I call you "Princess" too? It's easier to type. Sounds as if you've had far too much grief in your life. Definitely it is time to look after yourself and love yourself. Know that you deserve self-esteem and good health. But no one else can give these things to us. Only we ourselves can do it. And do it we can! I, too, am a serious carb-addict - an emotional eater. But I am 60 now and can't get away with it anymore. I have two dear sons and a most beautiful and precious daughter who is only 25 years old who doesn't want to lose her Mum. I just hope it isn't too late. We know this WOE works so let's get and give all the encouragement we can from all these others who have similar struggles. I'll watch for your posts. All the best.

islesgirl (Sue)
174/ 115?

[pri17cess72]

Thank you Sue!! It makes me feel good to hear your comments. I have had plenty of grief, but my New's Years Resolution (well one of them) is to take control of my life, my feelings, and my self esteem. I feel so much better doing Low Carb and it will give me a boost of self accomplishments. I will look for your posts as well and glad to know you care!

Liz PS you can call me princess!

[pri17cess72]

Today I did well for my first reinduction. I ate clean and had my water. I feel so much better than I did yesterday with all the binging on sweets I did.

Will check in tomorrow. I am doing a morning daily weigh in. I keeps me honest and motivated.

I just need to start exercising again. I have not exercised consistently for about a year.

[pri17cess72]

Today 12.28.06 183.4lbs.

I am losing all the Christmas week cheat weight!! I think I was down to about 179lbs prior to my Christmas week cheat. I am so happy I am close to that goal again.

Well, had my first day of clean eating and feel great. Today I have to go to one of my stores that is 1.5 hr drive one way. It is the farthest store from me. It is hard to stay on plan when I have these long drives, but I have stayed on plan before and I can do it today!!

Woke up feeling pretty good today. The wind was blowing so hard out here last night I could hear it and it was howling.

[pri17cess72]

183.3 lbs. Today is the start of day 3 on induction. So far so good. I have been eating clean. My travel to one of my stores 1.5 hrs away was not so bad. There is a Wendy's close by so I had a cheesburger (sans bun) and felt good.

Today should be a good day as well. Looking forward to having a fresh start to the new year.

[JannyLite]

Liz: You're doing great!! We're pulling for you.

You might find this thread really helpful for some positive inspirational thinking: http://www.lowcarbfriends.com/bbs/se...earchid=925913.

[chloe2t]

hi princess. thx for stopping by my journal. I think it's great that you are back on track. You seem to be doing a fabulous job of it too!!!

I am glad that you are getting rid of the cheat week weight, and that you are feeling good.

chloe

[pri17cess72]

Thanks Chloe....
Jan, I could not click on the link...can you help?

Today was not as good as a day as I expected. One of the girls at one of my stores brough in fudge. I had three pieces......YIKES!!!!

Here we go again.....Am I subconsciencoulsy waiting for New Years to make this official???? I feel like it because I cant stop cheating. Didnt eat dinner so late in the evening around 9pm I had 5 chicken mc nuggets.

I really need to get serious about this.....Got to get back on track.

[pri17cess72]

12/30/06 185lbs.....after my fudge and mc d's setback last night, I am up again.....

ARRRGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!

I am going to do this!!

[JannyLite]

Wow, sorry. Don't know what I did wrong there. The post I thought you'd find helpful was written on 11/9/06 by Ixtapacheryl and entitled "Positive Thinking and Losing Weight?" in the Main Lowcarb Lobby. I found it when I searched for more of her threads after an insightful remark she made to another post of yours.

Let's see if this link works better: Positive Thinking and Losing Weight?

Oh, and by the by...if the fudge at work is getting you down, make some of this Coconut Oil Fudge for yourself. I just tried it last night and it is great!!

Sorry to be invading your journal space. I'll be quiet now!

[pri17cess72]

Hi Jan,

I was able to see the link. I have not had a chance to read all of it yet, so I cant comment but I will as soon as possible.
Ixtapacheryl is very inspirational and I am sure her post is right on.

Today I weighed in at 187lbs. Today is the last day of my horrible old WOE. I am on track starting Jan 1,2007. I read another members journal who really inspired me today. She really showed me through her own challenges what I am really struggling with. It is my self esteem. My weight gain is a symptom of that. I want to be in control of my own happiness, and esteem. The weight loss is just a benefit.

I am tired of being overweight. I am tired of so many people telling me how beautiful I am if only I would lose weight. I am tired of worrying if my BF is checking out other woman wishing I looked like them. I am tired of going on vacation and not being able to wear shorts and skirts and tank tops. I am tired of covering up. I went to Hawaii and wore long sleeves in the sweltering heat because I was embarrassed of who I became.

It is time for a new me. I am up for the challenge. I cant wait to be at my goal. 145lbs-150lbs. It is about a 40lb to 50lb loss for me.

I want to be healthy and happy. I want to live long and not feel this way. I cannot wait to feel so good.

So thank you to everyone who is visted my journal and inspired me to overcome my challenges of low self esteem and using food to self medicate.

Have a happy New Year!!!

[chloe2t]

Hi Liz ,

It means so much to get to the point where we can learn to love ourselves. Part of that journey is for us to support each other.

Struggles that we have had will strengthen us if we let them. The challenge is to get past the pain and learn that we are strong enough to overcome the issues of our past, learn from them, and help others to learn how to do this as well.

Remember that each new day is a beautiful blessing. It is ok to celebrate yourself, to honor yourself, and seek healing anew each day.

The fact that you are able to share your challenges openly means that half of the battle is already won. Remember that in order to be who we were designed to be, we have to be brave enough to face the issues that brought us to this point.

You are doing that, and I respect that more than you know.

keep on truckin', and I will be looking for your posts also, lovie.

love,
chloe

[pri17cess72]

Walked 1 hr today and 1 hr yesterday. I think it is about 3 miles.
I used to exercise at least 5 days a week.

The last time I exercised before yesterday was around Halloween.

I have not done myself justice by not exercising. I will commit to this new WOE and I will commit to regular exercise.

When I exercised today and yesterday I felt soooooo good. I will have to remember that when I dread doing exercise.

[pri17cess72]

Okay....I promised myself that today is going to be the day. This is going to be the first day of a new healthy fit me. I will get control of my emotional eatiang. I will start feeling good about myself. I will start exercising regularly.

The last few days I have eaten all the forbidden foods, to get it out of my system....I guess. I have thrown all the junk away in my home. I am ready to do this and I am going to do this.

Cheers to a new fit, healthy and happy me!!!!

[chloe2t]

hello, princess!!!

good for you!
Het, i joined the challenge today, too, so we can be accountability buddies(but i am SO not good at exercising) Still, we can do it together

chloe

[pri17cess72]

Took a 45 min walk today. My foot hurts in my arch slightly...not sure why. That is 3 days in a row I have exercised.
Today is day 1 of my induction. I ate clean today.

B: eggs w/ ham
L: Chicken salad
D: Steak and veggies Broccoli and yellow squash.
S: Turkey and cheese roll up. plenty of water and 1 diet rite.

I am planning on starting my gallon of water a day plan. This only lasted one day but hopefully I can do this or at least .5 gal to gal a day.

[chloe2t]

hey princess, you're off to an awesome new year! joining an exercise challenge and a back on track one too!!!!!

I am gonna walk the megamountain today (in my journal) and try WATP later.
what cardio r u planning?

see you later, sunshine

chloe

[pri17cess72]

Off to a good start....passed my first day of induction. I love to eat low carb and dont find it hard to do. The only time I slip up is if I am super hungry and there is no low carb food around.

One day at a time....
I checked my BMI it is 30.1 Obese.
A healthy BMI is 145lbs....so far I have the right goal in mind.

Have a great day!!!!!

[pri17cess72]

Feeling good today. Just completed my 1 hr walk with BF. BF and I have decided that we need to stretch more, we dont have much flexibility. Thought about trying yoga.

2nd day of induction-no problems. I feel very accountable by journaling everyday.

B: Chicken salad
L: LC protein bar
D: Chicken, asparagus and spinach
S: half avocado, cheese.
Drank .5 gallon of water.
Back on the CLA/GLA combo this is day 2 along with induction.

BF suggested that we go on a cruise when we lose weight. I think that is a good idea. BF does not have much weight to lose. He gained a few pounds over the month of Dec, he is very muscular and I am sure he will burn it off.

Good day....

[kiwicherryprincess]

Aw, Chloe and Liz, mind if I join in on this two-some??? Liz, I think you are determined and you are going to be successful at anything you try because of that. You'll always get back on the wagon, I can see that in you.

You sound like you have the same problem as me when it comes to certain foods: compulsive eating. I love cookies, and if I could have just one serving when they're around, that would be great! But I feel compelled to eat them all until they are gone. That's when the cookie goes from being a treat to a downright problem. Most thin people (even though we think they can eat whatever they like) in reality they're able to eat that one serving and be content. If we we're able to discipline ourselves to accepting that same amount, we would be good too. Does that all make sense???

Hehe, anyways, I am officially a subscriber now of your thread, and thinking about getting one of these journal-thingies for myself. I am planning a trip to Pleasanton to visit my aunt that lives there and if you are interested in a meeting, I am available! I will let you know when.

As for me, well, I've gotten over the frappuchino-incident, and so far low-carbing is a piece of cake.... except that only two days in and I already feel like I'm turning into a giant meat patty. Let's hope I can stick it out for 13 more days!

Your Loyal Subscriber,
"Kiwi"

[pri17cess72]

So good to have you stop by my journal Kiwi....by the way, I love calling you that. Feel free to stop by anytime and it is a good idea that you start a "kiwi" journal. I come to my journal everyday and write about how my day went. Makes me feel good. Let me know if you start one.

Yes, I agree we are compulsive and emotional eaters. I only feel in control of that when I an LCing.

Well off to day 3 of induction.
Kiwi- I also do CLA/GLA combo there is a thread under vitamins and supplements. Check it out and tell me what you think.

[pri17cess72]

day 3 induction