It's never too late...

Potaty · 11-04-2006, 12:20 PM

"It's never too late to be what you might have been."
~George Eliot

Wow. This journal is really hard for me to start for some reason. I guess because I have failed at two other journals and I have failed at losing this weight more times than I can count. I guess I'm scared that I will fail once again.

I'm not sure what my problem is with not being able to stay focused and actually lose this weight. I have some ideas of "why" pertaining to my past, but I even question that. Am I just thinking that so I will have a good excuse that will get sympathy from others? So I can say, "I'm overweight because X, Y, and Z has happened to me?" I will not allow X, Y, and Z to be my excuse anymore. In life you can choose to be a victim or you can choose to be a survivor. I choose the latter.

I am currently facing some fertility/cycle related issues that my doctor thinks can be helped by losing weight. I want a baby, but you wouldn't know it by the choices I make at mealtimes. If I know that only a 10% drop in my weight will help my issues, then why do I put junk in my mouth? I don't know the answer to that question and it drives me crazy!!! I am not getting any younger (I am 28) so if feel the pressure to start a family soon since I would like to have 3 children.

My plan for at least the next month is to continue with the Colonix program (I'm only on day 2), drinking a SlimStyles shake for breakfast, and low carb the rest of the day. I can't say I'm doing induction because of the shake. I only use 1 scoop of SS plus the fiber in the Colonix program for breakfast, so I will be getting 18.5 carbs in the morning (13 of those coming from fiber). That doesn't bother me, even though I count total carbs (not net) because I know how good fiber is for me. So even if my total carb counts are higher at the end of the day, I still know I am eating healthy and getting my fiber in.

I am also taking this journal 5 pounds at a time. I just get so overwhelmed when I look at the whole picture. It is much easier to tell myself I have to lose five pounds, and then repeat that however many times. My signature will reflect my current progress and my total progress. I will not focus on what I have left to lose, except within those current five pounds.

Any lurkers I may have, I have a favor to ask of you. Please, please post and let me know you're reading. It helps me so much to stay motivated and on track.

My ultimate goal for this journal is for it to end in a pregnancy.

At that time I will start a whole new journal on low carbing during pregnancy (maintenance levels, of course

).

Bluqq · 11-04-2006, 01:23 PM

I will be a lowcarbfriends aunt
dont you worry!

We are all here for you

vwchick · 11-04-2006, 06:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Potaty

Any lurkers I may have, I have a favor to ask of you. Please, please post and let me know you're reading. It helps me so much to stay motivated and on track.

Hey woman, you KNOW I'm reading. ALWAYS.

If it would help, I'll start posting more often to keep your butt in line!

Sounds like you have a good plan. And, taking it 5 pounds at a time is much less stressful than the big picture. I hope you know that I'm always here for you if you need me- call, email, whatever.

BTW, I love the new avatar. Riley looks so happy.

Potaty · 11-04-2006, 09:50 PM

Thanks Colleen and Bonnie for stopping by! Means the world to me!

Potaty · 11-05-2006, 11:28 AM

Today will consist of mega home improvement projects to get my house in tip-top shape for the baby shower I am throwing next Saturday. Interspersed of course with training our puppy Jake to be a good boy. I'll try to post some pics of him soon, he is sooooo sweet!

JoyInHope · 11-05-2006, 02:04 PM

Hi there! Just popping in to say hello and that I love the puppies picture in your avitar! I saw your post in the Making a More Fabulous Me challenge board and I always like to see what folks are writing in the journals.... so be encouraged and drop by our challenge thread again (those girls are very silly and inspriring!).

Have a good day!

~ Cathy

buffedstuff · 11-05-2006, 08:22 PM

I am here rooting you on...I wish you the very best keep aiming for the goal.

Sadler_Girl · 11-06-2006, 04:34 AM

I found the new one

!!!!
I hope you are having a great MOnday.

vwchick · 11-07-2006, 01:19 PM

Hey chick! Still going strong? You better get your butt in here for an update!!

Any medical news? Is the Colonix, ahem, "working" for you? (No pics please...a simple yes or no will do!

) Sorry...I'm so immature.

I hope everything is going well.

Potaty · 11-07-2006, 11:02 PM

Yeah, I'm doing good, I have just been sooo busy this week trying to get my house finished for the shower, plus working! Ack! Why did I offer to host the danged thing!!!!

The Colonix is helping in the sense that I'm more, ahem, regular. However, I have not seen anything scary or spectacular. Not sure if I'm thankful or disappointed.

Tomorrow is the day I am supposed to double everything though so it may change!

No news on the medical front yet. Still no TOM (on day 70 now) but my boobies have started hurting again so I'm hoping to start soon!

Thanks for checking on me! After Saturday passes I will be back on a daily basis, I'm sure!

Bluqq · 11-08-2006, 04:23 AM

We are all here for you!

Sadler_Girl · 11-08-2006, 08:45 AM

I hope today is great!
I am thinking of you!

Potaty · 11-08-2006, 10:22 PM

Thanks to everyone for posting!!!

It's 11:20 pm and I am just now sitting down for the day. I am lazy at heart so I hate being this busy!!!! My ideal day includes daily napping, watching tv, and of course eating.

Today I saw my first scariness from the Colonix. 'Nuff said.

Sadler_Girl · 11-09-2006, 02:19 AM

sorry you are seeing scarry things. I hope you better and get a nap today!

Potaty · 11-09-2006, 01:43 PM

I have been struggling as usual. I hate to admit that on my journal but if I'm not honest with myself "publicly" than I am just cheating myself. I have got to kill the cravings!!! I have been tempted several times today to run to the store for bad foods, and I have resisted. I have tried several times today to talk myself into just starting on Sunday, but I have resisted. Today I have been 100% on track. I teach tonight and I have had a bad habit of drinking Pepsi during class so tonight will be a huge challenge, but I am going to face it and succeed!

I bought the Atkins book last week to re-read it. I lost my copy somehow and I wanted to refresh in my brain all of the science behind it.

Sadler_Girl · 11-09-2006, 04:10 PM

I am so proud of you! You are geting all of your thooughts out there.

I am glad you are back at the MMFM!

heidi21062 · 11-09-2006, 06:47 PM

Hey Kate!

I'm so glad you decided to join us again at MMFM!

I the Colonix colon cleanse about 2 years ago...I never did see the 'scary stuff' that everybody on their website talked about...

I bought 2 kits...I've been thinking about doing it again...I've been having a lot of upper GI discomfort lately - although I've been taking Nexium for a couple of weeks and it's gotten much better - I wondered if the Colonix would help...I guess it couldn't hurt...I guess everybody needs a good 'cleaning out' every once in a while!

vwchick · 11-09-2006, 08:27 PM

Good for you for being strong even though you're struggling with bad thoughts. You rock!

Is the Colonix making you feel any different? I was watching an infomercial the other night about something similar (same thing, different name as far as I can tell.) They claimed that sluggishness is caused by clogged colon. People were talking about how much energy they have and how much better they feel in general. I'm very sluggish...but I'm also scared of freaky things coming out of my body!

BTW, I love your idea day!

We could have so much fun together if we lived close...just sittin' around and being lazy!

Bluqq · 11-12-2006, 12:54 PM

Kate how was the shower?

Sadler_Girl · 11-12-2006, 01:53 PM

Just popping in to say hello!

Samantha42 · 11-12-2006, 03:39 PM

Hey Kate--

Out of curiousity, what does your Dr. think you have that would be improved with weight loss? I'm very interested in the field of reproductive endocrinology and I'm wondering what kinds of things your Dr. has told you?

Sorry to be super nosey! You know you can get back on plan and do this! Your 5 lb increment goals are a great idea. I kinda did the same (see below), unfortunately I have yet to make one of my mini-goals!

But I'm getting close! Do this with me! PM me as much as you want even if just to vent... I know it's frustrating when you want something really badly but keep sabatoging yourself (so it seems), but once you get back into the groove of things it will be so much easier. Just give yourself the 3 days to get into ketosis and see how helpful it is at keeping you onplan.

You owe it to yourself to get back on plan... think about the long term gratification and not the short term high of carbs! Did you make it without the Pepsi?

Potaty · 11-12-2006, 03:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Samantha42

Out of curiousity, what does your Dr. think you have that would be improved with weight loss? I'm very interested in the field of reproductive endocrinology and I'm wondering what kinds of things your Dr. has told you?

She mentioned a couple of things, but maybe they are all the same with different names. She mentined insulin resistance, metabolic syndrome aka X factor. I am wondering if she might be thinking PCOS too but she didn't mention it. The first round of bloodwork tested for thyroid, pituitary, and prolactin levels and they came back normal.

As soon as I start TOM (on day 74 now), I go back in on day 3 & 21 to see if I'm ovulating. On day 21 I also have to do an insulin resistance test, which she said is the same as the glucose intolerance test but they look for different things. My breasts became sore again about a week ago so I am praying for TOM (never thought I'd say that!) just to put my mind at ease.

Gotta run, dh and I are going on a date to reward ourselves for our hard work this week with finishing the inside of our house. The shower was awesome, I will post pics soon!

Sadler_Girl · 11-12-2006, 03:52 PM

Have fun!
Can't wait to see the pics.

Potaty · 11-13-2006, 02:46 PM

The shower was wonderful. I don't have many pics as I was too busy running the thing, but my mom forwarded me some of hers.

Look at Riley and Jake in the background!

The cake says "Welcome little sweet pea". Soon to be daddy calls soon to be mommy sweet pea so I thought that would make a cute cake. I ordered it and when I picked it up, it looked terrible. I wanted to cry. On the way home, it dawned on me that it looked like girl anatomy with a baby head coming out. This is how it looked originally before I made them fix it

:

Samantha42 · 11-13-2006, 03:39 PM

HHAHAHAHAHA IT does look like a little girl!!! If you had kept it that way I bet it would have been a total riot! The finished one is adorable though!

So how's your day going??

vwchick · 11-13-2006, 07:31 PM

Cute cake and nice table layout but Riley and Jake standing outside has to be the absolute most adorable thing EVER!

I assume that's a door that they're staring in? They almost make me want to get a dog!

How's everything else going? Were you reasonably good during the shower?

Get your butt in here and let us know how you're doing!

Sadler_Girl · 11-13-2006, 07:57 PM

Too cute the table the cake but I just

the dogs!

11-04-2006, 12:20 PM	#1
Potaty Very Gabby LCF Member!!! Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Mulletvane, where mullets grow long and luxurious Posts: 3,407 Gallery: Potaty Stats: Losing weight for another baby! WOE: Atkins	It's never too late... "It's never too late to be what you might have been." ~George Eliot Wow. This journal is really hard for me to start for some reason. I guess because I have failed at two other journals and I have failed at losing this weight more times than I can count. I guess I'm scared that I will fail once again. I'm not sure what my problem is with not being able to stay focused and actually lose this weight. I have some ideas of "why" pertaining to my past, but I even question that. Am I just thinking that so I will have a good excuse that will get sympathy from others? So I can say, "I'm overweight because X, Y, and Z has happened to me?" I will not allow X, Y, and Z to be my excuse anymore. In life you can choose to be a victim or you can choose to be a survivor. I choose the latter. I am currently facing some fertility/cycle related issues that my doctor thinks can be helped by losing weight. I want a baby, but you wouldn't know it by the choices I make at mealtimes. If I know that only a 10% drop in my weight will help my issues, then why do I put junk in my mouth? I don't know the answer to that question and it drives me crazy!!! I am not getting any younger (I am 28) so if feel the pressure to start a family soon since I would like to have 3 children. My plan for at least the next month is to continue with the Colonix program (I'm only on day 2), drinking a SlimStyles shake for breakfast, and low carb the rest of the day. I can't say I'm doing induction because of the shake. I only use 1 scoop of SS plus the fiber in the Colonix program for breakfast, so I will be getting 18.5 carbs in the morning (13 of those coming from fiber). That doesn't bother me, even though I count total carbs (not net) because I know how good fiber is for me. So even if my total carb counts are higher at the end of the day, I still know I am eating healthy and getting my fiber in. I am also taking this journal 5 pounds at a time. I just get so overwhelmed when I look at the whole picture. It is much easier to tell myself I have to lose five pounds, and then repeat that however many times. My signature will reflect my current progress and my total progress. I will not focus on what I have left to lose, except within those current five pounds. Any lurkers I may have, I have a favor to ask of you. Please, please post and let me know you're reading. It helps me so much to stay motivated and on track. My ultimate goal for this journal is for it to end in a pregnancy. At that time I will start a whole new journal on low carbing during pregnancy (maintenance levels, of course ). __________________ KATY POTATY CHRISTMAS CHALLENGE GOAL: 175 November Goal: to start exercising & to stay on plan during the weekends

11-05-2006, 11:28 AM	#5
Potaty Very Gabby LCF Member!!! Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Mulletvane, where mullets grow long and luxurious Posts: 3,407 Gallery: Potaty Stats: Losing weight for another baby! WOE: Atkins	207. Today will consist of mega home improvement projects to get my house in tip-top shape for the baby shower I am throwing next Saturday. Interspersed of course with training our puppy Jake to be a good boy. I'll try to post some pics of him soon, he is sooooo sweet!

11-09-2006, 01:43 PM	#15
Potaty Very Gabby LCF Member!!! Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Mulletvane, where mullets grow long and luxurious Posts: 3,407 Gallery: Potaty Stats: Losing weight for another baby! WOE: Atkins	209 I have been struggling as usual. I hate to admit that on my journal but if I'm not honest with myself "publicly" than I am just cheating myself. I have got to kill the cravings!!! I have been tempted several times today to run to the store for bad foods, and I have resisted. I have tried several times today to talk myself into just starting on Sunday, but I have resisted. Today I have been 100% on track. I teach tonight and I have had a bad habit of drinking Pepsi during class so tonight will be a huge challenge, but I am going to face it and succeed! I bought the Atkins book last week to re-read it. I lost my copy somehow and I wanted to refresh in my brain all of the science behind it.

11-09-2006, 08:27 PM	#18
vwchick MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Ohio Posts: 2,489 Gallery: vwchick Stats: 200.6/ ... /150 5'9" WOE: Atkins Start Date: Restart: 22 Sep 2008	Good for you for being strong even though you're struggling with bad thoughts. You rock! Is the Colonix making you feel any different? I was watching an infomercial the other night about something similar (same thing, different name as far as I can tell.) They claimed that sluggishness is caused by clogged colon. People were talking about how much energy they have and how much better they feel in general. I'm very sluggish...but I'm also scared of freaky things coming out of my body! BTW, I love your idea day! We could have so much fun together if we lived close...just sittin' around and being lazy! __________________ Bonnie 2002-2003: 257/170/150 (Atkins)

11-12-2006, 03:39 PM	#21
Samantha42 Senior LCF Member Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Illinois Posts: 2,547 Gallery: Samantha42 Stats: 205/189.6/150 5'5" 25y/o WOE: LC	Hey Kate-- Out of curiousity, what does your Dr. think you have that would be improved with weight loss? I'm very interested in the field of reproductive endocrinology and I'm wondering what kinds of things your Dr. has told you? Sorry to be super nosey! You know you can get back on plan and do this! Your 5 lb increment goals are a great idea. I kinda did the same (see below), unfortunately I have yet to make one of my mini-goals! But I'm getting close! Do this with me! PM me as much as you want even if just to vent... I know it's frustrating when you want something really badly but keep sabatoging yourself (so it seems), but once you get back into the groove of things it will be so much easier. Just give yourself the 3 days to get into ketosis and see how helpful it is at keeping you onplan. You owe it to yourself to get back on plan... think about the long term gratification and not the short term high of carbs! Did you make it without the Pepsi? __________________ SAMANTHA a little piece of my heart.... Of all the things you can do, what will you do?

11-04-2006, 01:23 PM	#2
Bluqq Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: New Yawk Posts: 11,654 Gallery: Bluqq Stats: 144/102 Start Date: 11/24/05	I will be a lowcarbfriends aunt dont you worry! We are all here for you

11-04-2006, 09:50 PM	#4
Potaty Very Gabby LCF Member!!! Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Mulletvane, where mullets grow long and luxurious Posts: 3,407 Gallery: Potaty Stats: Losing weight for another baby! WOE: Atkins	Thanks Colleen and Bonnie for stopping by! Means the world to me!

11-05-2006, 02:04 PM	#6
JoyInHope Senior LCF Member Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Pacific Northwest Posts: 768 Gallery: JoyInHope Stats: 206/181/169 (37yo, 5'8") Start Date: LC succes in 2004, back at it in 2007!	Hi there! Just popping in to say hello and that I love the puppies picture in your avitar! I saw your post in the Making a More Fabulous Me challenge board and I always like to see what folks are writing in the journals.... so be encouraged and drop by our challenge thread again (those girls are very silly and inspriring!). Have a good day! ~ Cathy

11-05-2006, 08:22 PM	#7
buffedstuff Senior LCF Member Join Date: Sep 2005 Posts: 641 Blog Entries: 4 Gallery: buffedstuff WOE: BFFM	I am here rooting you on...I wish you the very best keep aiming for the goal.

11-06-2006, 04:34 AM	#8
Sadler_Girl Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: sarasota florida Posts: 15,825 Gallery: Sadler_Girl Stats: 282 start Start Date: 3/5/2006 (full into on the 9th) for the last time	I found the new one !!!! I hope you are having a great MOnday.

11-07-2006, 01:19 PM	#9
vwchick MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Ohio Posts: 2,489 Gallery: vwchick Stats: 200.6/ ... /150 5'9" WOE: Atkins Start Date: Restart: 22 Sep 2008	Hey chick! Still going strong? You better get your butt in here for an update!! Any medical news? Is the Colonix, ahem, "working" for you? (No pics please...a simple yes or no will do! ) Sorry...I'm so immature. I hope everything is going well.

11-07-2006, 11:02 PM	#10
Potaty Very Gabby LCF Member!!! Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Mulletvane, where mullets grow long and luxurious Posts: 3,407 Gallery: Potaty Stats: Losing weight for another baby! WOE: Atkins	Yeah, I'm doing good, I have just been sooo busy this week trying to get my house finished for the shower, plus working! Ack! Why did I offer to host the danged thing!!!! The Colonix is helping in the sense that I'm more, ahem, regular. However, I have not seen anything scary or spectacular. Not sure if I'm thankful or disappointed. Tomorrow is the day I am supposed to double everything though so it may change! No news on the medical front yet. Still no TOM (on day 70 now) but my boobies have started hurting again so I'm hoping to start soon! Thanks for checking on me! After Saturday passes I will be back on a daily basis, I'm sure!

11-08-2006, 04:23 AM	#11
Bluqq Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: New Yawk Posts: 11,654 Gallery: Bluqq Stats: 144/102 Start Date: 11/24/05	We are all here for you!

11-08-2006, 08:45 AM	#12
Sadler_Girl Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: sarasota florida Posts: 15,825 Gallery: Sadler_Girl Stats: 282 start Start Date: 3/5/2006 (full into on the 9th) for the last time	I hope today is great! I am thinking of you!

11-08-2006, 10:22 PM	#13
Potaty Very Gabby LCF Member!!! Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Mulletvane, where mullets grow long and luxurious Posts: 3,407 Gallery: Potaty Stats: Losing weight for another baby! WOE: Atkins	Thanks to everyone for posting!!! It's 11:20 pm and I am just now sitting down for the day. I am lazy at heart so I hate being this busy!!!! My ideal day includes daily napping, watching tv, and of course eating. Today I saw my first scariness from the Colonix. 'Nuff said.

11-09-2006, 02:19 AM	#14
Sadler_Girl Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: sarasota florida Posts: 15,825 Gallery: Sadler_Girl Stats: 282 start Start Date: 3/5/2006 (full into on the 9th) for the last time	sorry you are seeing scarry things. I hope you better and get a nap today!

11-09-2006, 04:10 PM	#16
Sadler_Girl Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: sarasota florida Posts: 15,825 Gallery: Sadler_Girl Stats: 282 start Start Date: 3/5/2006 (full into on the 9th) for the last time	I am so proud of you! You are geting all of your thooughts out there. I am glad you are back at the MMFM!

11-09-2006, 06:47 PM	#17
heidi21062 Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Transplanted to NC...but my hearts in Hampton, VA.... Posts: 14,573 Gallery: heidi21062 Stats: 190/176/110 - 5'3" WOE: Atkins..no WW's...wait a minute....what day is it? Start Date: Started WW 07/28/08 @ 178.6 lbs	Hey Kate! I'm so glad you decided to join us again at MMFM! I the Colonix colon cleanse about 2 years ago...I never did see the 'scary stuff' that everybody on their website talked about... I bought 2 kits...I've been thinking about doing it again...I've been having a lot of upper GI discomfort lately - although I've been taking Nexium for a couple of weeks and it's gotten much better - I wondered if the Colonix would help...I guess it couldn't hurt...I guess everybody needs a good 'cleaning out' every once in a while!

11-12-2006, 12:54 PM	#19
Bluqq Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: New Yawk Posts: 11,654 Gallery: Bluqq Stats: 144/102 Start Date: 11/24/05	Kate how was the shower?

11-12-2006, 01:53 PM	#20
Sadler_Girl Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: sarasota florida Posts: 15,825 Gallery: Sadler_Girl Stats: 282 start Start Date: 3/5/2006 (full into on the 9th) for the last time	Just popping in to say hello!

11-12-2006, 03:52 PM	#23
Sadler_Girl Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: sarasota florida Posts: 15,825 Gallery: Sadler_Girl Stats: 282 start Start Date: 3/5/2006 (full into on the 9th) for the last time	Have fun! Can't wait to see the pics.

11-13-2006, 02:46 PM	#24
Potaty Very Gabby LCF Member!!! Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Mulletvane, where mullets grow long and luxurious Posts: 3,407 Gallery: Potaty Stats: Losing weight for another baby! WOE: Atkins	The shower was wonderful. I don't have many pics as I was too busy running the thing, but my mom forwarded me some of hers. Look at Riley and Jake in the background! The cake says "Welcome little sweet pea". Soon to be daddy calls soon to be mommy sweet pea so I thought that would make a cute cake. I ordered it and when I picked it up, it looked terrible. I wanted to cry. On the way home, it dawned on me that it looked like girl anatomy with a baby head coming out. This is how it looked originally before I made them fix it :

11-13-2006, 03:39 PM	#25
Samantha42 Senior LCF Member Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Illinois Posts: 2,547 Gallery: Samantha42 Stats: 205/189.6/150 5'5" 25y/o WOE: LC	HHAHAHAHAHA IT does look like a little girl!!! If you had kept it that way I bet it would have been a total riot! The finished one is adorable though! So how's your day going??

11-13-2006, 07:31 PM	#26
vwchick MAJOR LCF POSTER! Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Ohio Posts: 2,489 Gallery: vwchick Stats: 200.6/ ... /150 5'9" WOE: Atkins Start Date: Restart: 22 Sep 2008	Cute cake and nice table layout but Riley and Jake standing outside has to be the absolute most adorable thing EVER! I assume that's a door that they're staring in? They almost make me want to get a dog! How's everything else going? Were you reasonably good during the shower? Get your butt in here and let us know how you're doing!

11-13-2006, 07:57 PM	#27
Sadler_Girl Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: sarasota florida Posts: 15,825 Gallery: Sadler_Girl Stats: 282 start Start Date: 3/5/2006 (full into on the 9th) for the last time	Too cute the table the cake but I just the dogs!