Never Give Up

mtsofmercy · 10-01-2006, 04:29 PM

"Never Give Up"

I won't. I will never stop trying to lose this weight.

Growing up, I was never huge, but I always "chunky". I suppose I always carried about 10-20 lbs more than I should've. As time passed, I kept gaining. My 8th grade year I went on the Slim-fast diet and got down to 146 lbs. I remember even then having a tummy. I am, afterall, only 5' 2". At any rate, I remember feeling pretty good at that weight and seeming to be pretty normal compared to my friends. During high school my weight went up and down depending on how busy I was with work and school activities. By my senior year I was wearing a 12 or 13 in juniors, but was noticing things were getting snug. By the end of my first year of college, I was in a 15 juniors or 16. Then I got pregnant w/ my daughter. I remember being 215 lbs. the day I delivered her. That was the first time I went over 200 lbs. After having her I was back down in the 190's and wearing a 16. Over the next year or so I started working full time and was a single mom and I pretty much stayed at that weight. In 2000 I got married. I remember my dress was a size 20 and I cried all the way home after we bought it. Over the first year of our married we both gained weight, and by the fall of 2001, I was about 240 lbs. We were trying to get pregnant and having no luck b/c I had stopped ovulating. The dr. introduced me to lowcarb (protein Power) and I found this message board. I lost about 27 lbs. then found out I was pregnant.
The day I had my second daughter, I weighed 247 lbs. and by Sept. of 2002 I was down to 199. I started back to college again and life was busy and stressful and I quickly gained up to 253 lbs by the spring of 2004. I struggled from around May of 04- Nov.04 to lose about 30 lbs. Finally in Nov. I got a grip and started losing... by New Years of 2005 I was 217 lbs. and by March, after meat fasting and doing strict low carb, had reached 187 lbs. The lowest weight I ever saw was 180 but I only saw it one day. lol
I veered off plan, and by Nov. of 05 was back to 238 lbs. and found out I was pregnant w/ baby #3. The day I had him, I weighed 275 lbs. My highest ever.
I am now 2 months post partum and have lost 33 lbs. to date. The weigh fell off easily at first, but then starting creeping back on. I took control last Mon. and am down 7 lbs now. I am going to do this. My husband and I want to have one more baby, but I want to reach my goal first.
As of right now, I have 102 lbs to lose...and am already down 33. When all is said and done that will be a total loss of 135 lbs. I know I can do this.
I will post menus here, struggles, thoughts, feelings, tips, etc.

I will never give up.

mtsofmercy · 10-01-2006, 04:34 PM

It is interesting to write a weight history like that. I have never done that before. I see that I have been guilty of the weight creep my entire life. 10 lbs gained here, 10 lbs. there, up and down. That has to stop. I know it is bad for my health and I want to be healthy. I have 3 beautiful kids that need me. I have a family history of diabetes, heart disease, cancer, etc. and I know I need to be healthy if I'm going to be around for my kids.

This past week has been pretty easy so far. Knock on wood. I was shooting for meat fasting, but allowed myself a salad here and there. It is funny, b/c then I end up craving lettuce instead chocolate. How funny is that? And yet, it goes to show, that those cravings are a total mind thing. Your body just wants what it "can't" have.

We had a potluck at church today though, and I was not even tempted by the desserts. I can see myself thin. I believe if you have a vision of something, you can see it come to pass. The goal is bigger and more important to me, than a cookie or a piece of cake. A moment on the lips, forever on the hips.

So true!

cdn_gal · 10-01-2006, 04:44 PM

*peeking in*

Good luck to you Amber, I'm sure with that attitude you'll reach all your goals in no time!! You have done so well since Gabey baby was born!! KUTGW!!

*slipping back into lurkdom*

TXLoser · 10-01-2006, 04:45 PM

Amber,
Thanks for journaling....I have seen you succeed at this before and I have absolutely no doubt you will do this again.

Good job making it through the pot luck...and isn't it funny how you were craving salads!!!

You WILL do this Amber, and I am in your corner cheering you on...

mtsofmercy · 10-01-2006, 07:55 PM

Thanks you guys!

I am so thankful for the wonderful support!

ya guys!!

mtsofmercy · 10-01-2006, 08:00 PM

Final menu for today:
b: coffee, cream/sweetner
l: 7 layer salad, roast beef, broccoli w/ cheese
snack: Iced Coffee w/ sf vanilla and cream (Starbucks), cheese
d: bacon, turkey rolls
snack: 1 sf ice cream bar

I ate a lot more today than I have been eating. All on plan of course... I just sort of grazed all evening though. I felt the urge to binge on legal foods and stopped myself and went for more water instead. Tomorrow it's back to meat and eggs to get my cravings under control again.

Night!

TXLoser · 10-02-2006, 06:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mtsofmercy

I felt the urge to binge on legal foods and stopped myself and went for more water instead.

WAY TO GO AMBER!!!!!!!!

mtsofmercy · 10-02-2006, 07:15 AM

Good morning! The scale read 241 this a.m. so that's a loss of 8 lbs. for last week.

mtsofmercy · 10-02-2006, 10:45 AM

b: 2 c black coffee
l: 3 jr. bacon burgers, no bun, diet coke

Reva72 · 10-02-2006, 11:51 AM

Hey Girl! You know I am always here cheering and supporting you. It was great chatting with you this morning. I have missed ya like crazy. WE CAN AND WILL DO THIS!!!! We have been thru good and bad times together. The weight gain that we have seen is just a major bump in the road that we know how to smooth out. We will get there before you know it.

cdn_gal · 10-02-2006, 11:56 AM

8 lbs??

You rock girl!!!

Way To Go!!!!

mtsofmercy · 10-02-2006, 02:26 PM

Thanks Reva and Lei!

Topazz · 10-02-2006, 02:33 PM

Keep up the good work Amber. You are doing great!

Hugs to Gabe too

mtsofmercy · 10-02-2006, 05:13 PM

Thanks Topazz!

Dinner was hamburger, green beans and mozz. cheese mixed. YUM!

TXLoser · 10-02-2006, 05:20 PM

WAY TO GO AMBER..........
8 lbs in a week is fantastic...KUTGW

Reva: Nice to see you here as well

ScarletBlonde · 10-03-2006, 10:42 AM

For 8lbs lost!!!!

your new avi.

I hope you don't mind, but I hope to keep visiting you here!!

mtsofmercy · 10-03-2006, 02:32 PM

Thanks Diane and Scarlet!You are more than welcome to stick around!

Menu today:
b: coffee
l: leftover hamburger, green beans and mozz. cheese "casserole" from last night
snack: coffee (everyone went to lunch at Arby's. I had already eaten so I just drank more coffee)

I'm running out the door to take the girls to cheerleading practice... I'll post more later. We had internet issues all day..

sooo frustrating...

Later!

TXLoser · 10-03-2006, 03:58 PM

Good job Amber.

Are you eating enough food? Only coffee for breakfast

I think I remember you posting the hamburger/green bean/moz cheese casserole before. Do you add anything for a "sauce"?

Good willpower at Arbys!!!

Even if I ate I would have been tempted to eat the meat...

mtsofmercy · 10-03-2006, 05:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TXLoser

Good job Amber.

Are you eating enough food? Only coffee for breakfast

I think I remember you posting the hamburger/green bean/moz cheese casserole before. Do you add anything for a "sauce"?

Good willpower at Arbys!!!

Even if I ate I would have been tempted to eat the meat...

I know... bad me for not eating breakfast...

It is hard for me b/c I'm not a morning person and I usually feel nauseated until around 11. LOL I do eggs and sausage sometimes, but then I find my calories are sky high for the day...

The hambuger/greenbean/cheese thing (I really need to come up w/ a name for this!! lol) is just beef, green beans, mozz cheese and then spices. It is so good.

Thanks for your support... It means so much to me!!

mtsofmercy · 10-03-2006, 05:24 PM

dinner: chicken tenderloin w/ ranch and cheddar cheese
snack: vanilla caramel tea

cdn_gal · 10-03-2006, 05:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mtsofmercy

The hambuger/greenbean/cheese thing (I really need to come up w/ a name for this!! lol) is just beef, green beans, mozz cheese and then spices. It is so good.

That sounds so yummy!! And I guess you could pretty much toss whatever kind of spices you want in it?! I'm so gonna try that tomorrow for dinner!

WTG for staying away from the family Tatertot thingy too!!

Topazz · 10-03-2006, 11:15 PM

Amber, I have a horrible time with the scale if I don't eat. Looking at your food for the last couple of days, I think that's why you were upset with the scale today. I know it's hard to find time to eat, but maybe you would do better to try to get in some more veggies and at least 2 meals??

We are here for you! Never give Up! (heard that somewhere before

)

TXLoser · 10-04-2006, 06:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mtsofmercy

I do eggs and sausage sometimes, but then I find my calories are sky high for the day...

Amber,
May I suggest turkey sausage then???
I too have the issue with calories and I have switched to turkey links..I buy a package and cook them up slice up 2-3 in my eggs. Two links is 100 calories. Not to mention they are very good. I had a hard time switching from beef burgers/sausage to turkey burgers/sausage but I do enjoy them and less calories...the turkey just never looked appetizing in the store, but it is good and I guess I was always used to beef

Keep up the good work...

mtsofmercy · 10-04-2006, 07:15 AM

The scale is going back down thank goodness!
Thanks for your suggestions guys!

Diane: I do love the turkey burgers, but never thought trying the turkey sausage! Good idea! I think I'll pick some up this a.m. when I go to the store. Thanks for the suggestion!

Topazz: I have been slacking on veggies, but I did eat 1/2 a can of green beans for each svg. of my "casserole".

Lei: Let me know if you like the "casserole"!

I was upset yesterday when I found out that a cup of coffee my husband got for me from the new coffee shop in town was full of half and half.

That could explain my gain and cravings too.

I went in there yesterday w/ my SIL and cousin for lunch. I had eaten at home, so was just going to have Iced Coffee w/ sf vanilla and a dibble of half and half b/c they don't have heavy cream. Well... a few days ago DJ had run and got me this and brought to me at home. When I went in yesterday I discovered that what they had made that day and tried to give me yesterday too was more like an iced latte... which would be 1 shot of espresso, sf vanilla and then the rest of cup filled up w/ ice and half and half. Basically, it's like drinking a cup of half and half.

No wonder I gained and was struggling w/ cravings.

I was so mad. I should've known better! At least I caught it yesterday and won't order that anymore...otherwise I suppose it could've slowed me down even more!

Oh and one more thing I wanted to add, I posted this in another thread and wanted to keep it here too. When I get discouraged I need to remind myself of what I wrote...

"... I have so far to go to get where I was, and it's hard not to be discouraged thinking about how long it's going to take to get there. I know I just have to keep taking it one day at a time though and forget the past and be proud of where I am now, knowing that I am doing my best."

I'll post a menu later. It's a busy day for Abby at preschool today... it's her snack day, it's show and tell and green day! The life of a 4 yr. old!! LOL

I'm still getting ready for Hannah's tonsilecomy on Friday too.

mtsofmercy · 10-04-2006, 12:49 PM

Menu so far:

b: eggs, sausage, coffee
l: tuna patties, mayo/mustard for dipping

I plan on chicken for dinner.

Topazz · 10-05-2006, 12:21 AM

where's your veggies

mtsofmercy · 10-05-2006, 08:53 AM

Sorry Topazz, I'm doing meat and eggs w/ a friend until Sunday... I meant to post that.

Still love me?

10-01-2006, 04:29 PM	#1
mtsofmercy AMBIE Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Ohio Posts: 14,661 Gallery: mtsofmercy Stats: see sig WOE: RNY Start Date: 04/16/07	Never Give Up "Never Give Up" I won't. I will never stop trying to lose this weight. Growing up, I was never huge, but I always "chunky". I suppose I always carried about 10-20 lbs more than I should've. As time passed, I kept gaining. My 8th grade year I went on the Slim-fast diet and got down to 146 lbs. I remember even then having a tummy. I am, afterall, only 5' 2". At any rate, I remember feeling pretty good at that weight and seeming to be pretty normal compared to my friends. During high school my weight went up and down depending on how busy I was with work and school activities. By my senior year I was wearing a 12 or 13 in juniors, but was noticing things were getting snug. By the end of my first year of college, I was in a 15 juniors or 16. Then I got pregnant w/ my daughter. I remember being 215 lbs. the day I delivered her. That was the first time I went over 200 lbs. After having her I was back down in the 190's and wearing a 16. Over the next year or so I started working full time and was a single mom and I pretty much stayed at that weight. In 2000 I got married. I remember my dress was a size 20 and I cried all the way home after we bought it. Over the first year of our married we both gained weight, and by the fall of 2001, I was about 240 lbs. We were trying to get pregnant and having no luck b/c I had stopped ovulating. The dr. introduced me to lowcarb (protein Power) and I found this message board. I lost about 27 lbs. then found out I was pregnant. The day I had my second daughter, I weighed 247 lbs. and by Sept. of 2002 I was down to 199. I started back to college again and life was busy and stressful and I quickly gained up to 253 lbs by the spring of 2004. I struggled from around May of 04- Nov.04 to lose about 30 lbs. Finally in Nov. I got a grip and started losing... by New Years of 2005 I was 217 lbs. and by March, after meat fasting and doing strict low carb, had reached 187 lbs. The lowest weight I ever saw was 180 but I only saw it one day. lol I veered off plan, and by Nov. of 05 was back to 238 lbs. and found out I was pregnant w/ baby #3. The day I had him, I weighed 275 lbs. My highest ever. I am now 2 months post partum and have lost 33 lbs. to date. The weigh fell off easily at first, but then starting creeping back on. I took control last Mon. and am down 7 lbs now. I am going to do this. My husband and I want to have one more baby, but I want to reach my goal first. As of right now, I have 102 lbs to lose...and am already down 33. When all is said and done that will be a total loss of 135 lbs. I know I can do this. I will post menus here, struggles, thoughts, feelings, tips, etc. I will never give up. __________________ ´¨) ¸.• ´¸.•´¨) ¸.•¨) (¸.•´ (¸.•'Amber ~277/132/130~ (I've lost -145 lbs since RNY on 04/16/07!!)My Blog! Watch Me On YOUTUBE!

10-04-2006, 07:15 AM	#24
mtsofmercy AMBIE Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Ohio Posts: 14,661 Gallery: mtsofmercy Stats: see sig WOE: RNY Start Date: 04/16/07	242 The scale is going back down thank goodness! Thanks for your suggestions guys! Diane: I do love the turkey burgers, but never thought trying the turkey sausage! Good idea! I think I'll pick some up this a.m. when I go to the store. Thanks for the suggestion! Topazz: I have been slacking on veggies, but I did eat 1/2 a can of green beans for each svg. of my "casserole". Lei: Let me know if you like the "casserole"! I was upset yesterday when I found out that a cup of coffee my husband got for me from the new coffee shop in town was full of half and half. That could explain my gain and cravings too. I went in there yesterday w/ my SIL and cousin for lunch. I had eaten at home, so was just going to have Iced Coffee w/ sf vanilla and a dibble of half and half b/c they don't have heavy cream. Well... a few days ago DJ had run and got me this and brought to me at home. When I went in yesterday I discovered that what they had made that day and tried to give me yesterday too was more like an iced latte... which would be 1 shot of espresso, sf vanilla and then the rest of cup filled up w/ ice and half and half. Basically, it's like drinking a cup of half and half. No wonder I gained and was struggling w/ cravings. I was so mad. I should've known better! At least I caught it yesterday and won't order that anymore...otherwise I suppose it could've slowed me down even more! Oh and one more thing I wanted to add, I posted this in another thread and wanted to keep it here too. When I get discouraged I need to remind myself of what I wrote... "... I have so far to go to get where I was, and it's hard not to be discouraged thinking about how long it's going to take to get there. I know I just have to keep taking it one day at a time though and forget the past and be proud of where I am now, knowing that I am doing my best." I'll post a menu later. It's a busy day for Abby at preschool today... it's her snack day, it's show and tell and green day! The life of a 4 yr. old!! LOL I'm still getting ready for Hannah's tonsilecomy on Friday too.

10-01-2006, 04:34 PM	#2
mtsofmercy AMBIE Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Ohio Posts: 14,661 Gallery: mtsofmercy Stats: see sig WOE: RNY Start Date: 04/16/07	It is interesting to write a weight history like that. I have never done that before. I see that I have been guilty of the weight creep my entire life. 10 lbs gained here, 10 lbs. there, up and down. That has to stop. I know it is bad for my health and I want to be healthy. I have 3 beautiful kids that need me. I have a family history of diabetes, heart disease, cancer, etc. and I know I need to be healthy if I'm going to be around for my kids. This past week has been pretty easy so far. Knock on wood. I was shooting for meat fasting, but allowed myself a salad here and there. It is funny, b/c then I end up craving lettuce instead chocolate. How funny is that? And yet, it goes to show, that those cravings are a total mind thing. Your body just wants what it "can't" have. We had a potluck at church today though, and I was not even tempted by the desserts. I can see myself thin. I believe if you have a vision of something, you can see it come to pass. The goal is bigger and more important to me, than a cookie or a piece of cake. A moment on the lips, forever on the hips. So true!

10-01-2006, 04:44 PM	#3
cdn_gal Daddy's Girl Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Vancouver Canuck Land!!! Posts: 6,950 Blog Entries: 16 Gallery: cdn_gal Stats: 230/?/140~~5'10 WOE: Atkins Start Date: Sept9/08	peeking in Good luck to you Amber, I'm sure with that attitude you'll reach all your goals in no time!! You have done so well since Gabey baby was born!! KUTGW!! slipping back into lurkdom

10-01-2006, 04:45 PM	#4
TXLoser Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 10,612 Gallery: TXLoser Stats: 354/224 WOE: LC Start Date: January 2004	Amber, Thanks for journaling....I have seen you succeed at this before and I have absolutely no doubt you will do this again. Good job making it through the pot luck...and isn't it funny how you were craving salads!!! You WILL do this Amber, and I am in your corner cheering you on...

10-01-2006, 07:55 PM	#5
mtsofmercy AMBIE Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Ohio Posts: 14,661 Gallery: mtsofmercy Stats: see sig WOE: RNY Start Date: 04/16/07	Thanks you guys! I am so thankful for the wonderful support! ya guys!!

10-01-2006, 08:00 PM	#6
mtsofmercy AMBIE Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Ohio Posts: 14,661 Gallery: mtsofmercy Stats: see sig WOE: RNY Start Date: 04/16/07	Final menu for today: b: coffee, cream/sweetner l: 7 layer salad, roast beef, broccoli w/ cheese snack: Iced Coffee w/ sf vanilla and cream (Starbucks), cheese d: bacon, turkey rolls snack: 1 sf ice cream bar I ate a lot more today than I have been eating. All on plan of course... I just sort of grazed all evening though. I felt the urge to binge on legal foods and stopped myself and went for more water instead. Tomorrow it's back to meat and eggs to get my cravings under control again. Night!

10-02-2006, 07:15 AM	#8
mtsofmercy AMBIE Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Ohio Posts: 14,661 Gallery: mtsofmercy Stats: see sig WOE: RNY Start Date: 04/16/07	Good morning! The scale read 241 this a.m. so that's a loss of 8 lbs. for last week.

10-02-2006, 10:45 AM	#9
mtsofmercy AMBIE Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Ohio Posts: 14,661 Gallery: mtsofmercy Stats: see sig WOE: RNY Start Date: 04/16/07	b: 2 c black coffee l: 3 jr. bacon burgers, no bun, diet coke

10-02-2006, 11:51 AM	#10
Reva72 Blabbermouth!!! Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Missouri Posts: 7,140 Gallery: Reva72 Stats: 356/311/199 to start WOE: Atkins Start Date: 5/18/08	Hey Girl! You know I am always here cheering and supporting you. It was great chatting with you this morning. I have missed ya like crazy. WE CAN AND WILL DO THIS!!!! We have been thru good and bad times together. The weight gain that we have seen is just a major bump in the road that we know how to smooth out. We will get there before you know it.

10-02-2006, 11:56 AM	#11
cdn_gal Daddy's Girl Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Vancouver Canuck Land!!! Posts: 6,950 Blog Entries: 16 Gallery: cdn_gal Stats: 230/?/140~~5'10 WOE: Atkins Start Date: Sept9/08	8 lbs?? You rock girl!!! Way To Go!!!!

10-02-2006, 02:26 PM	#12
mtsofmercy AMBIE Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Ohio Posts: 14,661 Gallery: mtsofmercy Stats: see sig WOE: RNY Start Date: 04/16/07	Thanks Reva and Lei!

10-02-2006, 02:33 PM	#13
Topazz Guest Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Central Florida Posts: 5,600 Gallery: Topazz	Keep up the good work Amber. You are doing great! Hugs to Gabe too

10-02-2006, 05:13 PM	#14
mtsofmercy AMBIE Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Ohio Posts: 14,661 Gallery: mtsofmercy Stats: see sig WOE: RNY Start Date: 04/16/07	Thanks Topazz! Dinner was hamburger, green beans and mozz. cheese mixed. YUM!

10-02-2006, 05:20 PM	#15
TXLoser Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 10,612 Gallery: TXLoser Stats: 354/224 WOE: LC Start Date: January 2004	WAY TO GO AMBER.......... 8 lbs in a week is fantastic...KUTGW Reva: Nice to see you here as well

10-03-2006, 10:42 AM	#16
ScarletBlonde Big Yapper!!!! Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Puerto Rico Posts: 7,564 Gallery: ScarletBlonde	For 8lbs lost!!!! your new avi. I hope you don't mind, but I hope to keep visiting you here!!

10-03-2006, 02:32 PM	#17
mtsofmercy AMBIE Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Ohio Posts: 14,661 Gallery: mtsofmercy Stats: see sig WOE: RNY Start Date: 04/16/07	Thanks Diane and Scarlet!You are more than welcome to stick around! Menu today: b: coffee l: leftover hamburger, green beans and mozz. cheese "casserole" from last night snack: coffee (everyone went to lunch at Arby's. I had already eaten so I just drank more coffee) I'm running out the door to take the girls to cheerleading practice... I'll post more later. We had internet issues all day.. sooo frustrating... Later!

10-03-2006, 03:58 PM	#18
TXLoser Way too much time on my hands! Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 10,612 Gallery: TXLoser Stats: 354/224 WOE: LC Start Date: January 2004	Good job Amber. Are you eating enough food? Only coffee for breakfast I think I remember you posting the hamburger/green bean/moz cheese casserole before. Do you add anything for a "sauce"? Good willpower at Arbys!!! Even if I ate I would have been tempted to eat the meat...

10-03-2006, 05:24 PM	#20
mtsofmercy AMBIE Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Ohio Posts: 14,661 Gallery: mtsofmercy Stats: see sig WOE: RNY Start Date: 04/16/07	dinner: chicken tenderloin w/ ranch and cheddar cheese snack: vanilla caramel tea

10-03-2006, 11:15 PM	#22
Topazz Guest Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Central Florida Posts: 5,600 Gallery: Topazz	Amber, I have a horrible time with the scale if I don't eat. Looking at your food for the last couple of days, I think that's why you were upset with the scale today. I know it's hard to find time to eat, but maybe you would do better to try to get in some more veggies and at least 2 meals?? We are here for you! Never give Up! (heard that somewhere before )

10-04-2006, 12:49 PM	#25
mtsofmercy AMBIE Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Ohio Posts: 14,661 Gallery: mtsofmercy Stats: see sig WOE: RNY Start Date: 04/16/07	Menu so far: b: eggs, sausage, coffee l: tuna patties, mayo/mustard for dipping I plan on chicken for dinner.

10-05-2006, 12:21 AM	#26
Topazz Guest Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Central Florida Posts: 5,600 Gallery: Topazz	where's your veggies

10-05-2006, 08:53 AM	#27
mtsofmercy AMBIE Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Ohio Posts: 14,661 Gallery: mtsofmercy Stats: see sig WOE: RNY Start Date: 04/16/07	Sorry Topazz, I'm doing meat and eggs w/ a friend until Sunday... I meant to post that. Still love me?