Allie’s Journey to Lifelong Health and HAWTNESS

[AllieCat0817]

I need to type all this out, cause it is absolutely why I am where I am now.

I started my low carb journey on 5/23/03 at 213.5 lb. A little history:
I have always been chubby. I stayed with my grandmother a lot, because my mom was a single working mom attending grad school. My grandmother would not let us go to bed without first having a bedtime snack. My snack of choice was toast with butter. The bedtime snack thing haunted me for years – it’s a hard habit to break.

My earliest memory of ‘dieting’ was at the age of 13.

1985 – 1986. I lost about 30 lb in 8th grade. Of course it was low fat dieting, but it worked. I remember being 168 lb at that age.

In high school during senior year I had gotten up to 186 lb. In January of senior year, a very very dear close male cousin who I loved with ALL MY HEART died of full-blown AIDS. He lived with it for about 7 years, which at that time was a miracle in itself. But he withered away to nothing and suffered horribly. When he died, that killed me to my heart. I wore a huge tent dress to his funeral. After the funeral I was looking at the funeral pictures and I was horrified at a picture of myself standing at his grave crying. How did I get that big? My cousin wouldn’t want me being like that. That was in 1989-1990 and I had no idea that 186 lb was HARDLY big. But anyway, his death and that pic of me at his funeral propelled me to lose weight for my senior prom and high school graduation. By the time prom and graduation rolled around, I had gotten to 155, by eating high complex carb (lots of veggies and starches- potatoes, corn and low fat desserts) and also lots of walking. I looked hawt and I was excited and so was my family.

August 1990 I leave for college at 155 lb. College was about 3 hours northwest, in upstate SC.

June 1992, sophomore year of college. I am 192 lb. I all of a sudden began experiencing double vision, horrible headaches, neck and shoulder pain, and one side of my face started drooping (they thought Bell’s Palsy?). I had all kinds of testing done, cat scans, MRI's etc and was diagnosed with Papilledema (pseudo-tumor). It is swelling of the spinal fluid, which also increases pressure on the optic nerve. Basically I was going blind.

Wanna know the cause? Rapid weight gain. The neurologist said it was common in girls my age- college age who gain weight like that.

I had to get a spinal tap to reduce my spinal fluid pressure-- they first attempted it with no anesthesia but I had too much fat and they couldn't even find my spine. After that horrible procedure they had to sedate me to do the spinal tap to relieve the pressure. I was put on a medication for 5 yrs to keep it under control. I STILL have scar tissue on my optic nerve.

My neurologist and eye dr told me immediately I HAD TO LOSE WEIGHT. Remember I was 192 at the time. Did I lose weight? NOPE... cause I had medications that kept it under control. Why didn't I lose weight even though I went through that ordeal?-- I wasn't ready.

May 1994 College graduation. I am 220 lb. Even bigger than when I was diagnosed with Papilledema, despite the neurologist and eye dr warnings.

August 1995 Still 220-225 lb, leave to go to graduate school at Kent State University in Ohio to get my MBA.

December 1995 Still 220-225 lb, got married and found out my dad might be HIV positive. Things brings back memories of my favorite cousin who I loved so much, who died of full blown AIDS in 1990. My dad wasn’t admitting anything and was in denial about lots of things.

Father’s Day 1996 Dad is dying, wasting away, but won’t admit anything. Me and my mom (they divorced since I was 2) call an ambulance and force him to get inside. He is cussing me out for calling EMS. I will never forget the image of the EMT’s wheeling my dad’s 6 ft 2 in 125 lb skeleton into the ambulance. I still have no clue what really is wrong with him. Inside the ER, his Infectious Diseases doctor is called in and confirms for me that yes he is HIV+ and has full blown AIDS at this point, and has had HIV since 1985. My grandfather (deceased at this point) was the only person who knew. Dad admitted it to me right there in the ER, and thanked me and my mom for saving his life cause he wasn’t strong enough to do it himself. Up to that point he hadn’t taken ANY medications at all for his HIV. I had no idea, but his being in denial saved him. His body was VERY responsive to the cocktail and after a long fight, he bounced back. After being on the HIV cocktails, he went from 125 to 250 lb, things were looking great. He was getting TOO fat, and we find out he has diabetes which is hereditary in the family. His blood tests were revealing NO HIV at that point (which is still crazy to me). He and I reconciled A LOT of issues that had been building up for years and years. I had to learn forgiveness cause I knew he wouldn’t live forever. He turned his life around after being given the chance, all was well.

April 1999 After months of being in infertility meds and finally giving up totally, quit seeing all doctors, and quitting ALL medications and insisting that I wasn’t meant to be a mother, I find out I am two weeks pregnant. On a Saturday night I had a dream that I took a pregnancy test and it was +. So that Sunday morning I went to Wal Mart to buy the pregnancy test, and sure enough it was +. I am around 228 lb and newly pregnant.

December 1999 260 lb and ready to give birth. Thank you Jesus, Tuesday 12/28/99 6:33pm I give birth via emergency c-section to a healthy, BEAUTIFUL boy. 8 lb 11 oz, 20.5 inches. I still remember when they first pulled him out and held him up. So beautiful! A head FULLL of huge black curls, and a HUGE mouth like a cartoon character, wide open and screaming. I thought ‘boy oh boy this child is going to be a TRIP’. I aint neva lied! He still is and he still has that huge cartoon mouth.

6 weeks after giving birth Back to 225, down from 260 with no effort at all, just nursing and trying to eat ‘healthy’ for the baby.

November 2002 Had most of my thyroid removed, and Dad started having strange symptoms all of a sudden. Headaches, blurry vision, crazy images, etc. Turns out he has brain lesions. My first thought is, these brain lesions are a result of HIV. For the next 2 months he keeps having crazy symptoms, in and out of the hospital. Seems like everything is going wrong, yet his HIV doctor insists its not AIDS coming back and none of the problems are because of HIV. He never convinced me—it HAD to be his HIV. Dad’s diabetes was out of control- his sugar levels were at 600-700 sometimes, despite being on insulin and every other treatment. His sugar would spike for no reason. He was falling and passing out, having difficulty breathing, all kinds of crazy stuff. He also started losing weight, rather rapidly.

Friday January 10, 2003 Dad had just gotten out of the hospital on this day. He decided to go outside and empty the trash. A neighbor saw him pass out in the yard and called EMS. EMS came and got him and I happened to call the house to check on him and I was told to go to the ER immediately. I get to the ER, and the doctors have no clue what is wrong. His blood pressure is way way way low and they tell me he is very very sick. Dad is able to talk and tells me when he passed out in the yard he saw the letters GOD. I call my mom and tell her I’m at the hospital by myself and that dad is super sick. She comes down there so I won’t be alone. She comes in the ER with me and dad, grabs his hand and my hand, and we pray out loud. God is in control, not us. Dad goes into Intensive Care and they find that he had a blood clot which is why his blood pressure was so so low.

Saturday January 11, 2003 Dad is released from ICU and sent to the Cardiac Care unit. See, I told you EVERYTHING was going wrong at once. The brain lesions, the diabetes out of control, and now heart problems too? In the Cardiac Care unit, Dad says he feels GREAT. He is accepting visitors constantly and is on the phone all day and night with all of the people he knows. His face is bright and shining, he insists that he has the world’s best nurses and he feels so good he could jog across the bridge (dad aint NEVA exercised).

Sunday January 12, 2003 Dad’s face is still bright and shining and he is still constantly on the phone with his friends. Dad knew EVERYBODY and their momma, you better believe that. He didn’t just know them, he was FRIENDS with them. EVERRRYYYBODDDYY. But… he starts complaining about a pain in his neck. The nurses don’t know why. It got a little better, but the pain was still there. For some reason Dad starts unloading ALL THIS STUFF on me. I was like, WHY is he telling me all this???? I guess he wanted it off his chest. So at the end of the day I am mentally and emotionally DRAINED. When I left there he was on the phone with somebody, chatting his tail off happily, face still bright and shining. He looked NOTHING like he had looked for the past two months. Two days before he literally looked like death, but yesterday and today dad is filled with something. The Holy Spirit I see now in hindsight.

Monday January 13, 2003, 2:30am My phone rings, it’s the nurses. They say for me to get there now—Dad was nonresponsive and they were trying to bring him back. I went by myself. DH stayed home with my son. In the car on the way, I had an EXTREME feeling of peace, but I knew my Dad had gone home with the Lord. I knew it. I get to the cardiac unit and Dad’s door is closed and the hall is very quiet. Who is there but the same HIV doctor… I give him a questioning look and he silently confirms what I thought. Dad went home to Jesus. What a joyous night for Dad – Jesus was holding him and I felt some serious peace cause Dad didn’t have to suffer EVER again, ever. Not physically, emotionally, mentally, none of it. God is good all the time, all the time God is good.

Thursday January 16, 2003 We bury my Daddy.

Later on I am looking at the pictures of me at the gravesite and once again I am horrified. Why am I always at a close male (who had HIV) relative’s gravesite in January, crying, and just HUGE? Believe me, I thought right back to January 1990 when my beloved cousin died. Deja-vu.

Between January and April 2003 I know I have to lose weight. My parent is gone and I will NEVER see him again, not until I go home to the Lord too. I feel sorta alone but I am blessed that my momma is still here! But then she says she has borderline diabetes too. I am looking at myself, knowing that mom AND dad had/have diabetes, and I KNOW I am next. Its like I started feeling thirsty right then and there. God was telling me something- GET IT TOGETHER, and do it NOW. So I start researching about weight loss. Over and over again my research points to low carb eating, eating every 3-4 hours. I am led to Dr Atkins New Diet Revolution. A year later I am ~ 70 lbs lighter. I lose about 16 more the next year. The rest of my story is here:
AllieCat’s Place

[AllieCat0817]

Wed 5/3/06
I do not want to be a ‘skinny fat’ or ‘skinny flabby’ person. Thank you to the many many members here who are either working toward goal or already there, with HAWT bods, who eat well and exercise. Thank you for your presence and being a role model. Thank you Betty (Sugarless4life), JuliaL, JackieLBrowne, WatchMeShrink, Sandooch140, AveryJenn, and so so so so so so many many more.

I want to tone up. I don’t want to be a skinny fat person. I can’t. Not after all of that. Lord please help me learn and develop permanent good exercise habits to go along with the permanent way of eating I have chosen.

Yesterday’s menu:
84oz water spread thru the day
B: 1 cup yogurt w/ 2 tb golden flaxmeal (tastes better than the regular!), ½ orange, Rogerwood sausage link
L: 1 cup Dreamfield’s lasagna w/ ground beef meat sauce, ½ cup yogurt
D: 1 cup green beans cooked in chicken broth, ½ cup ground beef w/ lc ketchup
Exercise: 40 minutes of hard fast power walking
S: 1 cup yogurt w/ 1 tb peanut butter
Exercise: Cleaned house (mopped and vacummed floors).

OOOH I am soo sore today, my legs and arms. When I was walking I was swinging my arms like a crazy woman. I am blessed with such a beautiful neighborhood! Around the corner and down the street a ways is an old Civil War battleground. I knew a battle was fought in the neighborhood (the soldiers from the movie Glory were found in a mass grave right in this area). So I passed right by all these monuments and stuff and it’s a trail up in there too but I didn’t go cause I didn’t want to slow my momentum plus I was by myself and it was a lot of woods in there. There are so many beautiful roads right on the marsh, PERFECT for walking. I was a little nervous being by myself, but I saw an older couple walking so I quickly spoke to them and asked did they walk this way daily and they said yes, so I felt better. Plus I carried my cell phone with me.

[AllieCat0817]

Thursday 5/4/06

Yesterday 5/3/06:
84oz water spread throughout the day
B: 1 cup yogurt w/ 2tb golden flaxmeal, ½ orange, Rogerwood sausage link with mustard
L: 1 cup Dreamfields lasagna w/ groundbeef meatsauce, ½ cup yogurt
Exercise: 15 minute fast stroll at work
D: 1 cup green beans, ½ cup ground beef w/ lc ketchup
Exercise: 40 minute hard cardio walk in the neighborhood
S: 1 cup yocheese w/ 1.5 tb peanut butter

Calories: 1392

[CarolinaRocker]

Hi Allie! Come kick my butt....I havent worked out since I went to Florida

[AllieCat0817]

Girl I aint got NO ROOM to kick nobody's butt cause of not exercisin. Me workin out 2 days in a row don't qualify me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Girl PLEASE pray that I continue this.

[CarolinaRocker]

Geeez whats a girl gotta do to get her @ss kicked around here

[ddog27]

Your doing great Allie!! Keep up the good work!

[Tommyswife]

Awesome story Allie. Thank you for your transparency.

[bre_73]

Hey Allie,

As always, great post!

Is this your first attempt at consistence exercise?

--bre

[AllieCat0817]

Thanks all!!

I exercised every day prior to Atkins... but then I saw I could lose so good even without it, I got lazy.

[AllieCat0817]

5/5/06
I drove my walking route yesterday after I walked it so I could get the mileage. 2.4 miles, so so far I’ve done 7.2 miles total!

I am soo sore. Legs are on FIYAH. One problem is my right middle toe is hurtin, I think the nail keeps hitting on the shoe. Its hurting pretty bad. The nail is short but I cut it shorter just in case that was the problem. Last night I thought my nail was gon fall off. I can NOT have no foul looking toes cause I love some open toe shoes! I’m wearing some different shoes today.

My mom said she wants to come with me so she can see the route cause we usually NEVER drive back up in there and it is so gorgeous. I love smelling the honesuckles and confederate jasmine and the marsh and just hearing birds chirp as the only noise. Its LOVELY. Oh and how about its about 6 or 7 ROOSTERS chillin on the side of the road- they belong to this one HUGE mansion house. One day I didn’t see the roosters but they were c-o-c-k--a-doodle-dooin up a STORM when I was walking past. I felt like I was in the country for real.

Those roosters remind me of a time when I went to Nassau Bahamas with my friend to stay with her family and the neighbors had roosters which made that freakin noise starting at 5am. And I was like 7 weeks pregnant at the time and MAD at those roosters!

Yesterday 5/4/06
92 oz water spread throughout day
B: 1 cup yogurt w/ 2 tb golden flaxmeal, ½ orange, Rogerwood sausage link w/ mustard
L: 1 cup Dreamfields lasagna w/ meat sauce, ½ cup yogurt
D: 1 cup brocolli drizzled w/ ranch dressing; ½ cup ground beef w/ lc ketchup
Exercise: 2.4 mile fast power walk
S: 1 cup yocheese w/ 1.5 tb peanut butter
Exercise: 20 minutes of hand weights

Calories: 1415

[AllieCat0817]

I am REALLY hurtin but I did 2.4 more miles today. When I'm doin it, I feel NO PAIN. Must be them endorphins. My mom and her DH came cause I wanted them to see my route. We found some very very wooded trails and we also went into that battleground. VERY cool.

84oz water spread thru the day
B: 1 cup yogurt w/ 2tb golden flaxmeal; 1/2 orange; sausage link
L: Wild Wing Cafe w/ coworkers- 8 Chernobyl (supah hot) wings and a bowl of chili (no cheese)
D: 1 cup yogurt
Exercise: 2.4 mile power walk
S: 1 cup yogurt mixed w/ yocheese w/ 1 tb peanut butter

1495 calories

[AllieCat0817]

I took these today.

[AllieCat0817]

84 oz water spread thru day
HAWG DAY
B: 1 cup yogurt w/ 2 tb golden flaxmeal, 1/2 orange, sausage link
L: 1 chicken tender, toppings off 4 slices of pepperoni pizza, 1 cup yogurt
S: 1/2 bag pork rinds, South Beach chocolate crisp bar (at movies)
D: salad bar at Ruby Tuesdays, 2 hot wing drummies

Calories: 2026
Exercise: none

[CARBBABY]

Wow Allie,
You look fabulous. Sizzling hot! You are inspiring me to get off my duff and start some kind of exercising. I really need to. Your post about the skinny-fat really hit home. Got to get rid of the flab and tone up. Hats off to you lady.

[AllieCat0817]

Thanks Angie. I swear I HAVE TO be more toned. I can't begin to tell you how totally hard I sleep at night when I exercise that day. Seriously, the sleep is the BOMB. I can't wait to power walk tomorrow!!!!!!!

[Tommyswife]

Allie,

Girl you are so pretty. I love your spirit and sassyness (sp). I wish you lived closer because I'd love to have you as a walking/running partner. Love you hair cut.

[AllieCat0817]

Thanks TommysWife!! I feel good cause I just did 2 more miles, and this is the first time my son (6 yr old) went with me. He rode his bike. It was cool, except he can TALLLKKKKK, jeez.

[AllieCat0817]

Today Sun 5/7/06
Today is 12 years since I graduated college.

84oz water spread thru the day
B: 1 cup yogurt w/ 2tb golden flaxmeal, 1/2 orange
S: 1/2 cup yogurt w/ 1tb peanut butter
Exercise: power-walk 2.4 miles, 40 minutes
L: 1/2 bag pork rinds, 1 cup yogurt, sausage
S: Deviled egg half
D: 1 cup yogurt, 3 deviled egg halves
Exercise: 20 minutes hand weights

1337 calories

[Valentine Baby]

Originally Posted by AllieCat0817

Thanks TommysWife!! I feel good cause I just did 2 more miles, and this is the first time my son (6 yr old) went with me. He rode his bike. It was cool, except he can TALLLKKKKK, jeez.

Allie you have been such an inspiration to me since I started LCing.

I hear ya about walking with your son When my DD comes with me I sometimes feel like telling her to shut up! Not that I ever do but I have said to hush up! That girl can talk! I don't even have to answer her and she still continues to talk!

[AllieCat0817]

Today:
84oz water spread thru the day
B: 1 cup yogurt w/ 2tb golden flaxmeal & 2tb pecans; 1/2 orange; 2 deviled egg halves
L: 2 deviled egg halves; 1 cup boiled rutabagas n ham; 1/2 cup yogurt
D: 1 cup brocolli drizzled w/ ranch; 1/2 cup ground beef w/ lc ketchup
S: 1 cup yogurt/yocheese w/ 1 tb peanut butter; 2 deviled egg halves

Plan to walk 2.4 miles, will update later

[AllieCat0817]

Thanks for checkin in Val!!!!!!!!!!! Yeah listenin to motor mouth while you're trying to walk is like UGH. Thats supposed to be UNWIND time...

[AllieCat0817]

double post

[AllieCat0817]

OK I ate what I planned earlier for today:

84oz water spread thru the day
B: 1 cup yogurt w/ 2tb golden flaxmeal & 2tb pecans; 1/2 orange; 2 deviled egg halves
L: 2 deviled egg halves; 1 cup boiled rutabagas n ham; 1/2 cup yogurt
D: 1 cup brocolli drizzled w/ ranch; 1/2 cup ground beef w/ lc ketchup
S: 1 cup yogurt/yocheese w/ 1 tb peanut butter; 2 deviled egg halves
approx 1350 calories (I added it up but don't feel like looking in my written journal right now)

Exercise:
vacummed and mopped ceramic floors
vacummed carpet
AM/PM Callanetics back to back (40 minutes total) plus 75 extra ab pulses
20 minutes hand weights and maybe some more ab pulses

Worked my job 7-3:45 today. LOVE IT!