-sort of down-

[luvmyboyz]

Yesterday I went grocery shopping to get some much needed SB food friendly stuff. Anyway my dh went with me and we were going down the isles and he was getting some pot pies and asked me what kind I wanted. I told him I can not eat that kind of stuff with trying to lose weight and with the SBD. He said why are doing that stupid diet why can't you just eat simply and you should still lose weight. Okay I have tried portion control and did it for 2 mos and lost I think 4 lbs... but then I could not lose anymore. What makes the difference of what kind of diet I want to do? I mean I will fix my dh and kids what they want ... I am just really upset, cause I am SERIOUS about wanting to get this weight off! Yesterday for dinner I made grilled chicken, brocolli/cauliflower mix, spinach, and mac/cheese. I did not eat the mac/cheese myself. Like I said if they want the junk I will fix it. My boys are only 7 and 5 and I know they want the GOOD stuff well BAD stuff for me! I know I can't let this get me down but I am feeling that way! I had promised myself I would not get on the scales until Phase One is up which will be in a 12 days. But I cheated and got on today and I have lost 6.5 lbs already and I just started on Monday!! Of course I did just have surgery on my gall bladder so Friday and Saturday I did not eat much... but still! I told my dh this morning and said that is good. Well not very encouraging... I know I have started MANY diets and did not finish them, but good greif I am really trying here!!! I told my mother just wait till I get 20 lbs off and then see how ones react!! I guess I have vented enough. Just wondering if any of you have dealt with this same thing? On top of this yesterday I was having major withdrawls I suppose. I wanted CHOCOLATE so bad!! Oh the STRESS! I did make me a SB ricotta cheese CHOCOLATE dessert, so that helped!

[Shalbrihil]

Awww I'm so sorry that you had some discouragement in your family about this way of eating. We have all been were you are. I personally had a supporting hubby that went this road with me but I was very obese at the time and really needed to make some serious changes for my health. Now I'm around where you are now after losing over 100 pounds. We just have to ask ourselves just how much do we want this for ourselves. You were right in venting out this her with us. Now you will be strong and get this job done. I know you can't push this way of life on others in your family but buy setting the example with a good attitude you will soon see there proud looks.

Add some special things like an avacado or some black olives in your salads. While they are having cheese and mac have some coleslaw or 3 bean salad that you make up and have ready for yourself. Make sure you take the time for yourself and plan out special things that don't include food. We are here for you Tina. Let's get ourselves back on track and get this job done. Hugs to you. We can do this! It does get easier if we only give it a chance.

[rose1]

Hi, Tina. Please don't be discouraged. You know where your strength comes from, right? I don't know how tall you are or your bone structure, etc. but I can tell you that I can eat 800 cal. a day on the "regular" way of eating for a month and lose MAYBE one pound. It wasn't until I found SB that things clicked. We have always eaten whole foods-- fresh vegs and fruits, whole grains, very little "junk" , but,after having my last child at age 43, I could not get the weight off. She is now 16 and I finally, just this week, reached my pre-pregnancy weight. I need to lose about 15 more pounds. She and I are doing this together (actually, the whole family eats this way), because she is a competition dancer and the season starts the first of the year. She is working to get back into competition shape. SB will keep her weight in check and energy up. Come here often for encouragement and be sure to join us in the water and exercise challenges.

Emily's Mom

[luvmyboyz]

Thanks Sharon and Emily's mom! I am 5 ft 4 and medium frame so weighing 240 makes me look as wide as I am tall. I want to do SB cause of health issues going on with me and I just would like more support than oh that is great when I lose. Oh well ... I am glad I have you all to support me.

[redqueen]

Hi Tina!

I have also been the "girl who cried diet" and didn't stick with it for one reason or the other. It is hard to convince others that you are serious after a few failed attempts. But the proof will be in the weight loss that you will attain. One of the best ways to get your husband's support is just what you said: Just wait until 20 lbs is gone! Your DH may have been a bit defensive because, prodded to think about it, he probably knows a pot pie isn't the best thing for him either!

It might also help to not refer to your diet. I went out to dinner with friends last night and when I passed up the (yummy looking) garlic bread, I just said "My body doesn't react well to garlic bread" and there were no further questions. Had I said, I can't have italian garlic bread on Phase 1 of the SBD, I would have gotten an ear full of advice! So with the pot pie, you might have said "I don't think my body likes the white flour in the crust". Is this making any sense?

In any case, men can be insensitive without trying and without even knowing that they have been so. I would cut him some slack, remember this is new to him too. Wait and see how he reacts to those lost pounds!

You can do it, and we're all here to help you!

[luvmyboyz]

Thanks Chris! My hubby did say so what can you eat and I told him and he said so what are carbs anyway? LOL I wanted to laugh but explained.... men! And yes I have been on so many diets in the past..... oh so many!!! And I do understand where he is coming from... so like you said drop saying diet and just eat what I can and fix them whatever. Be happy right?!

[MotherNaturals]

Hi There!

I know where you are coming from, sort of. My hubby tries to be supportive of whatever way of eating I am trying but at times, he gets frustrated becasue I have tried so many things and have changed my mind so often. One week we will go shopping and I insist I am going to eat Raw and Living Foods only. Then the next week I realize that is too limited and I try Atkins for a while and buy only meat and cheese. I am really just in search of what will work with me so I can stay with it for the long haul but...he sometimes doesn't know what I am doing or why.

Also, my hubby eats the typical Italian American diet...pasta, meat...but drinks rice milk and no dairy. But, it is possi9ble to make one thing for everyone else and one things for you. Hopefully though, once everyone sees how happy and healthy you are on the South Beach Diet that your family will want to join right along with you. It sounds like this is really working for you and I am excited to learn more...my book is in the mail... I lost 54 pounds on Atkins before I met my hubby and tried it again but can't stomach the meat...it grosses me out. Anyway, I suggest that you sit down with your hubby and let him know how much his support would mean to you. As long as he knows how you are really feeling, he may be able to better support what you are doing. Let him know that you understand you have tried several things to lose weight in the past but that different people lose weight in different ways and that you have finally found something that will work for you. Also...like my hubby said, "Do you know why I want you to lose weight?" The answer was "because I know you are unhappy and want to lose it." Hopefully, your hubby feels the same...that he will support you because this is something you want. I amalso sure my hubby is hoping that if I lose weight I will stop complaining about the way I look! Also, pot pies are not good for anyone, if that makes you feel any better.

Peace and Keep Up The GREAT Work~Vanessa

[justmarvi]

Originally Posted by redqueen

Hi Tina!

I have also been the "girl who cried diet" and didn't stick with it for one reason or the other. It is hard to convince others that you are serious after a few failed attempts. But the proof will be in the weight loss that you will attain. One of the best ways to get your husband's support is just what you said: Just wait until 20 lbs is gone! Your DH may have been a bit defensive because, prodded to think about it, he probably knows a pot pie isn't the best thing for him either!

It might also help to not refer to your diet. I went out to dinner with friends last night and when I passed up the (yummy looking) garlic bread, I just said "My body doesn't react well to garlic bread" and there were no further questions. Had I said, I can't have italian garlic bread on Phase 1 of the SBD, I would have gotten an ear full of advice! So with the pot pie, you might have said "I don't think my body likes the white flour in the crust". Is this making any sense?

In any case, men can be insensitive without trying and without even knowing that they have been so. I would cut him some slack, remember this is new to him too. Wait and see how he reacts to those lost pounds!

You can do it, and we're all here to help you!

Ditto here Tina.....I don't think he really understands and might wonder how it's going to affect him during this change. I think he showed his support when he said, okay, what can you eat....most men don't express themselves like women.

Set your goals, stay on program, come here for support, you can be happy and do this. When mama's happy, everybody's happy.

[MountainGirl]

Hey Tina,

You know, we are here to support you!

My hubby was very non-supportive when I started Weight Watchers a few years ago and it was only after I really lost weight (I lost 82 pounds on WW) that he came around. I had been on many diets previously and he thought it was another "fad."

Well, I put that 82 pounds back on and now I'm doing SBd and he's VERY supportive, in fact, he wants me to make the SBD foods for him and I. I make other stuff for the kiddoes, but they do eat some of the SBD foods because they are simply healthy foods!

Anyway, I said all that to say, just do what it takes and don't be upset if your hubby isn't supportive right now, I would venture to say that he will be as he sees you really losing weight!

Hang in there, we're with ya!

[luvmyboyz]

Vanessa, Marva, and Mountaingirl
My hubby wants me to be healthy and wants to see me happy just like you had said your hubby said to you. He I suppose has just seen me on so many diets and well like mountaingirl said he probably thinks this is another "fad". I know by coming here often and venting or whatever I will get the support I need. At least there are others who understand and working toward the same GOAL! And yes Marva when Mama is happy everyone is happy! Good quote!

[SiameseCat]

Hi Tina,

I'm so sorry about hubby not being real supportive of your eating plan right now and I'm glad you came here and posted about it so we could all support you.

You're doing a great job and you're doing it for you so hang in there and just focus on your one perfect day at a time. Like the others said, I bet he'll be more enthusiastic about it once he sees it working for you.

Deb

[luvmyboyz]

Thanks Deb I am feeling much better and I think my hubby is coming around! Yippee!