For those struggling with maintnance...

[girl81]

For those struggling with maintnance...
I've come to realize that I think the reason that maintaining has become difficult is the fact that, in attaining my goal weight, I've come to realize that weight, a number, is not enough to make me happy. All of my troubles didnt magically dissappear when I attained my low weight. I foolishly continue to seek self worth through a number on a scale; it doesn't lie there and no number will ever be good enough if I don't have real self worth through other areas.
ETA: I want to add that I believe the reverse is also true. For years people have been telling me to put weight back on. With my recent struggles I have begun to (foolishly) think that gaining weight would alleviate my sadness. When will I learn, happiness is not a number on a scale.

[momov2boys]

Originally Posted by girl81

...weight, a number, is not enough to make me happy.
All of my troubles didnt magically dissappear when I attained my low weight.
...no number will ever be good enough if I don't have real self worth...
...happiness is not a number on a scale.

Great reminder, girl81!

Last Fall I weighed 98 pounds.

Sure, I liked seeing that number on the scale.
But I was actually no happier than I am today.

In fact, I was only more obsessed back then.
Food, calories and carbs pretty-much ruled all of my thoughts.

I think I'm getting better at letting go of the whole number on the scale crap.

While it's important to me to stay thin, the evil metal box is certainly not what matters most.

Here's to our health and happiness!

[BellaHMB]

We often think "if only I...." as the solution to unhappiness. Granted, I do feel
much better without 77 lbs to drag around! But it doesnt eliminate all the feelings
that helped me put them on in the first place.

Have you tried journaling? That helps me alot.

Bella

[girl81]

I'm also wondering, maybe the answer is to treat my addiction like a deceitful friend. Perhaps the best course of action is not to bargain with her, not to reason with her, and not to play with her; but rather to walk away from her. I have seen her true colors.
Perhaps part of my problem is my eternal optimism that there is good in everything... perhaps I must learn there is NO good in my addiction.

[JuliaL]

Girl - sounds like you are really doing some deep thinking about your health, lifestyle, and relationship with food and the scale. Personally, I believe I will always struggle with it, and as hard as I try, the number on the scale will always mean something to me. I have become pretty good at staying away from the darned thing when I know I haven't been eating well, but there is a fine line between denial (never getting on the scale) and letting the scale rule my life. I work on it every day.

[Woman Typing Badly]

excellent thread....

[steady]

Originally Posted by girl81

For those struggling with maintnance...
I've come to realize that I think the reason that maintaining has become difficult is the fact that, in attaining my goal weight, I've come to realize that weight, a number, is not enough to make me happy. All of my troubles didnt magically dissappear when I attained my low weight. I foolishly continue to seek self worth through a number on a scale; it doesn't lie there and no number will ever be good enough if I don't have real self worth through other areas.
ETA: I want to add that I believe the reverse is also true. For years people have been telling me to put weight back on. With my recent struggles I have begun to (foolishly) think that gaining weight would alleviate my sadness. When will I learn, happiness is not a number on a scale.

My weight was always a direct reflection of my happiness. After losing about 45 lbs, and keeping my weight between 100-105 lbs for 8 happy years, I once again, fell victim to emotional eating due to new stresses in life. My weight, a direct display of my unhappiness, jumped to 110 two years ago.

In search of happiness, I set myself up on strict low cal/low fat/high carb diet, a punishing intense cardio and weight workout schedules and daily weigh-ins. After weeks of faithfully following my plan of attack, I didn't lose any weight. Scale obsession, binge eating, and body image issues all reimerged.

By nature I am extremely self-sufficient, stubborn, problem-solving, control freak; Therefore, I was more determined and now desperate to get to that happy number on the scale. I kept saying to myself...if I could just get to 100lbs I will be happy again. After much research, and I went LC in Feb 2007.

I lost the weight in the first two-weeks of induction. I thought the weight loss would solve my problems and I would be happy again. Weighloss didn't instantly remove stress, take away loneliness, boost my body image. I concluded the weight loss was just that weight loss. However, the "WOE is a WOL" principle of Atkins made me realized I have to build a happy life.

Girl, you are so right...reaching a number on a scale doesn't make one happy and certainly should not increase or decrease ones self-worth. I hope that you dig deep and find what does make you happy and then go for it. YOU deserve it!!! For me and I hope you will see it this way too, maintenance it about building a life you want to live and maintain it for the rest of your life.. I wish you well. I feel for you...I feel we have similar struggles.

[Smythe]

Originally Posted by girl81

For those struggling with maintnance...
I've come to realize that I think the reason that maintaining has become difficult is the fact that, in attaining my goal weight, I've come to realize that weight, a number, is not enough to make me happy. All of my troubles didnt magically dissappear when I attained my low weight. I foolishly continue to seek self worth through a number on a scale; it doesn't lie there and no number will ever be good enough if I don't have real self worth through other areas.
ETA: I want to add that I believe the reverse is also true. For years people have been telling me to put weight back on. With my recent struggles I have begun to (foolishly) think that gaining weight would alleviate my sadness. When will I learn, happiness is not a number on a scale.

I think a lot of us stuggle with this. There is shame associated with being overweight (or too under weight). It illustrates a lack of self control or an ability to regulate ones behavior in relation to food. I have put on 15 lbs from my goal weight and I'm up 2 pant sizes. I am embarassed. I thought I had beat "the monster" and yet if I didn't get a grip I could wake up 192 lbs again before I knew it. Being slim gives a confidence I don't have when I'm heavy. But here's the weird thing... Now I consider myself huge at 140 lbs. How did I ever tolerate 192...I'll never know. I do know that regaining weight has keep me from socializing. My friends miss me...they like me for me...not my pants size! Too bad I don't feel the same way about myself. Kinda sad, no?

[Smythe]

Originally Posted by Smythe

I think a lot of us stuggle with this. There is shame associated with being overweight (or too under weight). It illustrates a lack of self control or an inability to regulate ones behavior in relation to food. I have put on 15 lbs from my goal weight and I'm up 2 pant sizes. I am embarassed. I thought I had beat "the monster" and yet if I didn't get a grip I could wake up 192 lbs again before I knew it. Being slim gives a confidence I don't have when I'm heavy. But here's the weird thing... Now I consider myself huge at 140 lbs. How did I ever tolerate 192...I'll never know. I do know that regaining weight has keep me from socializing. My friends miss me...they like me for me...not my pants size! Too bad I don't feel the same way about myself. That's kinda sad, no?

I definately need more work it that area

[JuliaL]

Originally Posted by Smythe

I do know that regaining weight has keep me from socializing. My friends miss me...they like me for me...not my pants size! Too bad I don't feel the same way about myself. Kinda sad, no?

Smythe - it makes me so sad to hear you say this! I too have gained some weight recently, about 8 lbs. and am up a pants size. When I mention to anyone that I've gained or that I'm frustrated about my weight they just roll their eyes. I know I don't look any bigger to them, but I know I am, and it's hard to deal with. My fear is the same as yours - that one day I'll wake up and realize I've gained all my weight back!

I'm trying really hard to just accept the fact that due to my age, hormone issue, etc., I might not be able to stay at a size 6. I don't want to be any more restrictive about my eating, and I don't want to have to think about it every minute - quality of life is important to me. I do continue to exercise regularly, and that helps with both my outlook and my waistline.

You are not a number on the scale or a size label! If you're healthy, that's all that matters. If you keep coming here and posting, and keep trying to make good healthy food choices every day you will never be obese again. Hang in there!

[BellaHMB]

Ive never been able to maintain at 135 (my present weight) but the only time I ever reached it was when I was 23! Also, I had done Atkins and lost over 70 pounds but then went back to my old eating patterns and within about 2 years was at 155 where I stayed for a long while. So I am nervous about whether I can maintain this weight now. I am eating healthy, but it is very strict! And Julia, Im 52 and post menopausal having stopped my periods naturally when I was 45.

Bella

[Smythe]

hi Julia-
Thanks for your kind words. I am not ready to give up the battle yet but I do get tired of fighting it. If I don't think about what I'm eating and get into the gym on a regular basis, it seems I'm sunk! It's like some crazy all or nothing mentality. I'm working on it. Thanks Girl

[MichelleM]

Great thread! Thanx for starting it. I too have always been 'obsssssssessed' with my weight and that damm NUMBER on the scale!

Ive been thin, fat, thin and fat in my life. ALWAYS a yo yoer. Funny but my self esteem 'issues' are very similiar (HA!) no matter what weight I have been at.

I used to sing for a living (in Las Vegas shows). There were VERY THIN dancers dancing behind me and I seemed to look 'ok' around them--(stayed around 130 lbs or so).

About 3 years ago I did a concert and weighed 129. Im doing a New Years Eve concert this coming new years. I now weigh 143 but HEY you know what?? I still sing the SAME!! I am still the SAME ME! I will just wear a girdle thingy (spanx) this time and wear a nice black velvet jacket thingy. Im actually handling this concert sooo much better than normal.

Im also 46 years old now so my bod is just a bit 'larger' than it was. (also am pre/peri menopausal).

Im realizing its OK! Im OK! No matter what weight I am. My goal is to lose a bit more before New Years (4 more lbs would be great!)...but MORE IMPORTANTLY my self esteem is what matters and the number on the scale will NOT determine how well I perform on stage or how well the audience reacts.

Thats just silly!

[KJ-43]

Hello all,

I too have put back on some of my weight... It started with vaction in October and some stressful events in my life along with getting sick and taking meds with sugar in it. I can say I not afraid b/c I know what to do and how to get back where I need to be. I have continued to work out and none of my clothes are tight as a matter of fact I can get into an eight. I say keep our heads up and our weight down and like the Nike logo, "Just Do it"

Karen