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Old 04-02-2014, 05:39 PM   #1
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Help With Social Drinking Expectations

I have a pretty good workplace with generally good people. The problem is that we have a lot of social and work functions to attend. At these functions and outings we're expected to drink. If you don't there is a lot of pressure to start. Not drinking is possible but it doesn't reflect well, as it's not considered team playing.

Unfortunately, I have always been something of a teetotaler as one drink leaves me floored. To get around the social obligation, I have relied on Shirley Temples and fizzy apple juice to pretend that I'm drinking. Now I'm LCHF, I'm not sure what to do. I could order a diet soda and say it's a mixed drink but diet sodas make me feel awful.

Does anyone have any clever substitutes?
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Old 04-02-2014, 05:46 PM   #2
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Soda water and lime. Looks like a cocktail, no drama. Teetotal in plain sight!
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Old 04-02-2014, 05:57 PM   #3
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You're brilliant! Thank you, I completely forgot about just plain soda water. I suppose I was so hung up on additives that I didn't even remember the one naturally without.
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Old 04-02-2014, 06:12 PM   #4
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Yes, my go to drink is absolute and soda water with a lime. I am sure soda water with a lime will do the trick
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Old 04-02-2014, 09:17 PM   #5
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Wait a minute. You actually are pressured to drink to fit in with coworkers? I would never pretend to be drinking if I didn't want to drink. What kind of business do you work in?
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Old 04-02-2014, 09:48 PM   #6
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She's in Australia. Very different culture.
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Old 04-02-2014, 09:58 PM   #7
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Drinking-related pressure at work is very common where I live. Everyone drinks! I don't drink and it makes me not want to go out socially. I am tired of everything revolving around drinking.
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Old 04-02-2014, 10:30 PM   #8
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LOL! I suppose it might sound a bit odd if you didn't know the specifics.

Australia is a bit different and having a beer with mates is a big togetherness/group bonding thing. This is particularly so in blue collar occupations and I work in the office of a landscaping business. My workplace encourages the office workers mix with the landscapers, so on Friday nights, everyone goes down to the local for a beer/drink or two before they have dinner out. There are also other events and whatnot regularly organized. Not having a drink suggests you're too good to drink with them or that you're wuss.


Occasionally, I will have a drink but usually at home as blood alcohol limits are very strict and I don't process alcohol well. I also don't like to be drunk out and one whole drink will get me there.
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Old 04-03-2014, 10:17 AM   #9
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Also I know you want to avoid a lot of AS - but not sure if they have them there but here we have SF mixes for drinks. So you can order a virgin skinny margarita, or mojito. Many of the crushed ice drinks don't have that much mix in it just mostly ice.

To make your seltzer/lime look more like a drink/mojito-ish you can have them add the crushed mint leaves (if you like mint).

If you can stand the carbs you might consider a virgin bloody mary and sip it through the night.

Other options are seltzer with a splash of cranberry juice (if they have one without a lot of carbs.) and slice of lime.

A daiquiri is strawberry/ice plus alcohol. Ask them to leave off the sugar and just make it with virgin with strawberries/ice.

of course some of these are more carby than others but might be a way to look like you "mix it up" ..
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Old 04-03-2014, 06:20 PM   #10
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I've never thought of that kind of adult peer pressure! Interesting.
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Old 04-04-2014, 08:45 AM   #11
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Wow I'm not sure what I would do in that situation. I take several medications that I can not drink alcohol with.
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Old 04-04-2014, 09:06 AM   #12
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I would probably explain that I can't drink then buy a round for everyone. Nothing says acceptance and understanding like free booze.
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Old 04-04-2014, 10:05 AM   #13
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Not an attitude I understand as I don't allow peer pressure to control my life. Life is way to short to live it by other people's whims/expectations...but then I tend to be a bit of rebel anyway and kind of enjoy 'rocking the boat'.

However, seltzer water is a decent conflict avoidance alternative.
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Old 04-04-2014, 11:10 AM   #14
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Originally Posted by backseatadventurer View Post
LOL! I suppose it might sound a bit odd if you didn't know the specifics.

Australia is a bit different and having a beer with mates is a big togetherness/group bonding thing. ..... Not having a drink suggests you're too good to drink with them or that you're wuss.
It's amazing how different drinking culture is in different countries! The US has a long history of temperance movements, Prohibition, etc. And there are still lots of "dry" places, where you can't even buy alcohol! Very different from the UK, Ireland, Australia - where the pub can be a second home, a place where people see their friends on Fridays for a pint or two, and bring their families on Sundays to watch the game.

I'm sure you do face a lot of pressure to be one of the lads and have a drink! But if you don't want to do it, just don't do it. Take the first round and get yourself a non-alcoholic drink, and then stick to it when it's someone else's round.

Don't apologize! Keep it short! "Just a coke for me, thanks!", "I'm fine with what I'm drinking, thanks!" "No thanks, I don't care for a beer today, mate!"

Say your piece, then stop talking and/or change the subject. If they come back, just repeat your short phrase again - the broken record technique .

People care mostly about themselves, so if you come up with a couple of short, confident things to say to the pressure, they'll back off. Soon you'll just be that guy - "backseatadventurer - he doesn't drink".


Good luck! Have fun! Report back and tell us what happens .
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Old 04-04-2014, 04:10 PM   #15
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I'm sure you do face a lot of pressure to be one of the lads and have a drink! But if you don't want to do it, just don't do it. Take the first round and get yourself a non-alcoholic drink, and then stick to it when it's someone else's round.

Don't apologize! Keep it short! "Just a coke for me, thanks!", "I'm fine with what I'm drinking, thanks!" "No thanks, I don't care for a beer today, mate!"
LOL, actually I'm a lady but I get your point.

To be honest, if I insisted and dealt with the ego bruises of my workmates, I could probably do what you're suggesting. Usually, I don't have problems saying no but being the new girl and so busy, it's easier to fake-drink. I just don't want to be bothered to deal with it.
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Old 04-04-2014, 05:21 PM   #16
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LOL, actually I'm a lady but I get your point.

To be honest, if I insisted and dealt with the ego bruises of my workmates, I could probably do what you're suggesting. Usually, I don't have problems saying no but being the new girl and so busy, it's easier to fake-drink. I just don't want to be bothered to deal with it.
Sorry!

But either way, self-confidence and good boundaries look equally good on lads or ladies .
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Old 04-04-2014, 06:14 PM   #17
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This makes me want to move to Australia!
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Old 04-06-2014, 04:14 AM   #18
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Hahaha...i am sort of with 85Cardinals on this one...though I feel for backseatadventurer!
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Old 04-06-2014, 09:43 AM   #19
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Club soda with lime...or wine spritzer heavy on the spritz
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Old 04-06-2014, 12:10 PM   #20
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Do they have non-alcoholic beer that could pass as real beer? I can understand feeling that pressure to drink. Now the question is, how do you avoid ordering at the bar without everyone hearing your drink is booze-free?
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Old 04-06-2014, 12:28 PM   #21
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My work crowd goes out sometimes and orders pitchers of margaritas. I say something like "too much sugar for me, I'm going to get something else" and excuse myself and go to the bar and order a diet coke. No one knows what is in there other than it is brown.
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Old 04-06-2014, 01:04 PM   #22
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I'm an alcoholic who is trying to quit and also trying to restart the low carb WOE, so I'm kind of glad we don't have those kinds of expectations where I work.
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Old 04-06-2014, 03:34 PM   #23
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I'm an alcoholic who is trying to quit and also trying to restart the low carb WOE, so I'm kind of glad we don't have those kinds of expectations where I work.
That is so awesome that you are trying to quit! It's a very hard step to take - some people don't even realize how very hard. I hope you succeed.
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Old 04-06-2014, 03:41 PM   #24
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I would probably explain that I can't drink then buy a round for everyone. Nothing says acceptance and understanding like free booze.
HERE, HERE!!
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Old 04-06-2014, 03:52 PM   #25
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I worked in sales and as an event promoter (and alcohol promoter) for years.

Sales teams, event planning, being a chef and working for a good ol' boys club will all put you in the hot seat/competition for drinking and socializing.

I agree with everyone else that you can order club soda with lime and get away with it. Please expect to pay for it ($1 or so) and be on your way.

My drink of choice has always been Stoli Soda with Lemon- no one would ever guess that there wasn't any vodka!
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