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Old 07-06-2013, 11:51 AM   #1
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Guess what my mom is bringing to my house?

My mom is diabetic, and eats about 300 - 400 carbs a day, I bet. She is at the point in life where she doesn't care anymore. I am always telling her to cut way back on the carbs.... but what I have NOT told her, or anybody, really, is that I am only eating 30 carbs or less per day. I took her shopping last week and the first 7 or 8 things she put in her cart were essentially 100% carbs..... Jelly, bread, rice cakes, granola.......

So, while I was on vacation this past week, someone took her to a farmer's market. She is on her way here with:

1. A loaf of peach bread.

2. A loaf of strawberry bread

3. A Shoo - Fly pie

4. "About 12 peaches"

5. A small watermelon.

I just got this message on my answering machine. She knows I have diabetes, too. I can't possibly imagine what she is thinking.

Good grief!
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Old 07-06-2013, 12:05 PM   #2
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What the family won't eat today, throw out. I know I hate to waste food, but what's the alternative? Let it sit around and spoil or eat it. Might as well throw it out before the fruit flies come out.
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Old 07-06-2013, 12:12 PM   #3
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Sounds like time to regift
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Old 07-06-2013, 12:30 PM   #4
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when this happens, I bring it to work!!! I'm not kidding I put ANYTHING in the lounge at 630am and by report at 7 it's half gone and by break time at 9ish IT's all GONE, I've even put out expired pop tarts once (like 3 months exp) as a test and no one even flinched knowing they were expired...their excuse, we work at a hospital....
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Old 07-06-2013, 01:20 PM   #5
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Originally Posted by Avicenna View Post
Sounds like time to regift

In fact, it does, and I think I know just the folks who would want it!
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Old 07-06-2013, 01:24 PM   #6
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Can you tell your mom you are on low carb?
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Old 07-06-2013, 01:42 PM   #7
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I would cut your mom some slack. You yourself only started this diet plan about a month and a half ago, so before then you probably would have eaten the things she brought over to the house. Plus, you did not share with her that you overhauled your diet, so how would she know that you are no longer eating that stuff?

I say take the food graciously, thank her, give the food to someone else or throw it away, and then later tell her about your new diet for the future.
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Old 07-06-2013, 03:05 PM   #8
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I would cut your mom some slack. You yourself only started this diet plan about a month and a half ago, so before then you probably would have eaten the things she brought over to the house. Plus, you did not share with her that you overhauled your diet, so how would she know that you are no longer eating that stuff?

I say take the food graciously, thank her, give the food to someone else or throw it away, and then later tell her about your new diet for the future.

Well, I AM diabetic, and I never would really have eaten much of that anyway..... I told her today.

I don't cut my mom slack ever, because she intentionally does things that she knows you don't want done. And she knows that even though I never said I went low carb, I have been telling her for years that she eats way too many carbs. So, it would likely follow that I don't eat like her. And I never have, even when I wasn't low carb.

We will give it all away tonight to neighbors.
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Old 07-06-2013, 03:11 PM   #9
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Congrats on your awesome weight loss stats. Re-gifting is good.

Sorry your mom vexes you so.
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Old 07-06-2013, 04:38 PM   #10
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I wish my Mom was still here to vex me....cherish your Mom...throw/give away/burn/donate the crap. Congrats on the weight loss
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Old 07-06-2013, 04:43 PM   #11
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Originally Posted by Garlic View Post
My mom is diabetic, and eats about 300 - 400 carbs a day, I bet. She is at the point in life where she doesn't care anymore. I am always telling her to cut way back on the carbs.... but what I have NOT told her, or anybody, really, is that I am only eating 30 carbs or less per day. I took her shopping last week and the first 7 or 8 things she put in her cart were essentially 100% carbs..... Jelly, bread, rice cakes, granola.......

So, while I was on vacation this past week, someone took her to a farmer's market. She is on her way here with:

1. A loaf of peach bread.

2. A loaf of strawberry bread

3. A Shoo - Fly pie

4. "About 12 peaches"

5. A small watermelon.

I just got this message on my answering machine. She knows I have diabetes, too. I can't possibly imagine what she is thinking.

Good grief!
That sounds like my mom (and my whole family). I grew up eating tons of carbs; that is how we were use to cooking. And lets face it, carbs are cheap and they last forever. Rice? Omg so cheap and can sit there in storage for a decade or more. Bread? Just freeze it if you can't eat it. And so cheap. Crackers, same thing, so cheap and last forever. On and on it goes. But meat is expensive and you have to keep it frozen. Veggies, gotta eat most of em fresh or they lose most of their nutritional value, and unless you grow them yourself, they are not cheap.

It's hard eating low-carb. It's expensive and the recipes that actually taste good are few and far between. I'm still struggling to find recipes that I like that are low-carb.

I have no idea how you get by on 30 carbs a day; I don't think I could do that. Would have to be eating only meat and veggies and dairy, no fruit, no desert, few nuts. I want my nuts and I want my 84% dark chocolate lol.
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Old 07-06-2013, 05:10 PM   #12
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Seeking, desserts are actually very easy on low carb. I made a low carb coffee cheesecake tonight. One portion has less than 4 carbs.... No crust, and certainly not as good as a Cheesecake Factory cheesecake, but pretty good, regardless.
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Old 07-06-2013, 05:11 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by glennjones View Post
I wish my Mom was still here to vex me....cherish your Mom...throw/give away/burn/donate the crap. Congrats on the weight loss
That is much easier if you have a good relationship with your mom. Mine is not like that.
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Old 07-06-2013, 08:17 PM   #14
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she's thinking you will join her in denial and eat them. it's hard, you don't want to seem disrespectful of the decisions she has made even when you disapprove. *hug*
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Old 07-07-2013, 02:09 AM   #15
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Being diabetic (my hubby is Type 2 the last 6.5 years), you could tell her you wish to keep Your toes, feet, legs and eyesight.
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Old 07-07-2013, 07:07 AM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mayleesa View Post
when this happens, I bring it to work!!! I'm not kidding I put ANYTHING in the lounge at 630am and by report at 7 it's half gone and by break time at 9ish IT's all GONE, I've even put out expired pop tarts once (like 3 months exp) as a test and no one even flinched knowing they were expired...their excuse, we work at a hospital....
Absolutely X 100 THIS!!!

It's a guilt free way of ridding yourself unwanted goodies, plus there are always plenty of skinny-Minnnies who greatly appreciate the stuff During the holidays and well, basically from September thur xmas, i am bombarded with things like loafs and loafs of home made Banana bread and so on...

I used to freeze them, but started taking them to work, leaving in break room with a simple note saying **enjoy** and wa-la...GONE!!
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Old 07-07-2013, 07:10 AM   #17
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Old 07-07-2013, 07:12 AM   #18
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Garlic, good for you for staying strong against your mom, who is a "food pusher." You did the right thing.
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Old 07-07-2013, 07:15 AM   #19
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So your mom brought you things she didnt realize you couldn't eat in small quantaties. I mean really- not horrendous. Cause really, I would have eaten the watermelon and peaches no problem and maybe a slice of the bread on occasion while losing and still lost. I am vlc now. Respect her choice then make yours, ---- regift or toss when she leaves . But still, remember even for non diabetics eating all of that food yourself in one sitting is never required. That may not be your mother's intention for you nor herself . Perhaps she is thinking you will be enjoying a slice on occasion or some peach and yougurt.

Still- if you don't want her to bring food tell her before she comes next time .

Last edited by Spanilingo; 07-07-2013 at 07:18 AM..
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Old 07-07-2013, 07:21 AM   #20
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A compost heap is a great means of guilt free food disposal! I know this doesn't work for everyone, but you can even freeze your waste, let it accomulate, and give to someone who has a compost heap.

Stand your ground against mom. Regardless of her motives, don't eat what she pushes on you. It may take a series of no's, but surely she will eventually get around to the idea that she is wasting her money. If not, still stick to no. You will grow stronger with each no (my little prediction).
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Old 07-07-2013, 07:27 AM   #21
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Spanilingo View Post
So your mom brought you things she didnt realize you couldn't eat in small quantaties. I mean really- not horrendous. Cause really, I would have eaten the watermelon and peaches no problem and maybe a slice of the bread on occasion while losing and still lost. I am vlc now. Respect her choice then make yours, ---- regift or toss when she leaves . But still, remember even for non diabetics eating all of that food yourself in one sitting is never required. That may not be your mother's intention for you nor herself . Perhaps she is thinking you will be enjoying a slice on occasion or some peach and yougurt.

Still- if you don't want her to bring food tell her before she comes next time .

Haha..... you don't know my mom.... when I was 42 years old, she left a box of Alli on my kitchen table, and a weight loss book. She does whatever she wants, and I am the "Beneficiary"..... No changing her at age 72.

Oh, and in addition to what she said she was bringing, she also brought spinach bread, and a French Apple Pie..... I couldn't eat all that if I had a year to do it if I was a diabetic. Or maybe I could, but I certainly wouldn't.
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Old 07-07-2013, 07:30 AM   #22
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I'm missing something here. Don't you have a wife and 4 children who do not eat low carb?

Couldn't some of this food that your mother brought be intended for the FAMILY rather than only you personally?

Even if you suspect her intentions, why not just freeze what will go stale before it can be eaten, and just let your family deal with the food. I'm sure they'll enjoy it.

You're not required to eat the food simply because it's in your house.
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Old 07-07-2013, 07:38 AM   #23
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I'm missing something here. Don't you have a wife and 4 children who do not eat low carb?

Couldn't some of this food that your mother brought be intended for the FAMILY rather than only you personally?

Even if you suspect her intentions, why not just freeze what will go stale before it can be eaten, and just let your family deal with the food. I'm sure they'll enjoy it.

You're not required to eat the food simply because it's in your house.
No, I have a wife and 2 children.... and my wife always tells her not to bring anything at all over to our house. As do I. In fact, she does it so often that I have thrown stuff in the trash in front of her before. You really don't know my mom. She does this stuff on purpose. And she can't afford to spend the money, but she does all the time.

No worries this time though, as 75% of it has already been given away, and the remainder will go to work with my wife tomorrow.
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Old 07-07-2013, 08:05 AM   #24
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Garlic,
I think you handled it beautifully. You know your mom better than anyone and, while she may not be able to afford it, she gets some type of pleasure out of it so consider it her 'entertainment'. At her age, she's likely not going to change.
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Old 07-07-2013, 08:09 AM   #25
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ah- I misunderstood! I thought she DIDN'T know and you were unsure how to spare her feelings!

I look at food pushers like anyone else who doesn't understand thAat "no means no". I find any person male or female who doesn't understand this personal boundary to be dangerous period .
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Old 07-07-2013, 08:14 AM   #26
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Quote:
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You're not required to eat the food simply because it's in your house.
Yeah...for some of us it's not that easy. I have no problem going out to dinner or other places where there are carbs and people sitting in front of me eating them...but if they're in my house, it is inevitable that I will cave and eat them. For that reason, carbs are not permitted in my home. My husband and my 20 year old still living at home eat the way I do or they get their carb fix outside the home. Fortunately, both 'get it' and they love me enough to comply.

I have several alcoholics in my extended family, their families live the exact same way and they have the exact same reaction to alcohol. They have no problem with someone drinking in front of them...but they can't have it in their home.

We all need to know our limitations and if his is that it can't be in his home, then he's smart to recognize that.
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Old 07-07-2013, 08:35 AM   #27
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Agree here, Aomiel. I prefer not to have alcohol in my home, for reasons you describe, and some foods, too. With distance from both, I grow strong enough to tolerate some in my home, but it takes some building up of my strength. Some people here seem to be able to have the food around and deal with it, but we all have different boundaries, and I think it is completely ok to tell someone not to bring food or alcohol into your home. I'd prefer not to freeze it and have it around. There may well be exceptions. I am thinking of funerals, when the tradition where I am from is for people to bring food to bereaved. But there are typically many guests around to work through that food. I got a good bar of dark chocolate as a thank you gift and still haven't been tempted, but it's at my office. My plan is to regift it. I do the same with wine. Sounds like garlic's mom is in a different category . . . although as I am getting older I don't care for the sentiment that at 72 we can't change.

Last edited by Patience; 07-07-2013 at 08:36 AM..
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Old 07-07-2013, 11:50 AM   #28
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Is your mom a bigger woman, too? Just wondering, maybe she is trying to sabotage you. Or just plain control,you. both which suck. Nice job on being strong. Maybe next time try a nice, hard stop at the front door. "Food stays out, you may come in.". Good luck!
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Old 07-07-2013, 11:59 AM   #29
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Yup, I would bring it to work. Those people will eat anything!!!!!
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Old 07-07-2013, 08:26 PM   #30
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Garlic View Post
She is at the point in life where she doesn't care anymore.
WHY doesn't she care about her health anymore? It is a shame when people give up on health.

my mom is 84 and dad is 82. no pills at all. they move more than me in a normal day I hope I get their genes into old age LOL


work around her. tell her direct what you are doing, why you are doing it, how good you feel, etc. and whatever she says, she says. Just say no to anything she brings or feed it to others or have her bring it home.

food ''gifts'' don't have to be accepted. there is always the garbage can when they leave HAHA (yea I've done it. my mom knows I am LC and supports it and sometmies just forgets what I eat and don't eat, but brought over a monster lasagna for us. family ate some and the rest hit the garbage. never told her that part...just said we loved it!)
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