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Old 06-25-2013, 09:17 AM   #1
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So down because I failed

I am feeling so down. I originally lost 30lbs last two months then fell off the wagon and gained back 20lbs this past month. Carbs are like a drug to me. I couldn't stop eating them. Now I am back on the wagon and determined to lose this weight. So depressing to have gained the weight. Has this happened to anyone else?

Theresa
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Old 06-25-2013, 09:20 AM   #2
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This has happened to everyone else, lol.
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Old 06-25-2013, 09:25 AM   #3
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Don't feel down because this has happened to almost everyone. Stay on course and you will succeed! Glad you are back!
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Old 06-25-2013, 09:27 AM   #4
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We've all done it lose4life! It sure is a confidence shaker.

In my case, it took me a long time to get to the weight I am and I know it will not come off overnight. It is as struggle that is worth it though. If weight loss was easy, every one would be thin.

Take it minute by minute, hour by hour and day by day...
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Old 06-25-2013, 09:31 AM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lose4life View Post
I am feeling so down. I originally lost 30lbs last two months then fell off the wagon and gained back 20lbs this past month. Carbs are like a drug to me. I couldn't stop eating them. Now I am back on the wagon and determined to lose this weight. So depressing to have gained the weight. Has this happened to anyone else?

Theresa
That's tough, sorry you're going through it. I was sorry when I went through it too. But, and here's the secret, it's a GREAT THING. Yes, I mean it. It's good to feel this sting, this regret, because it will keep you on track. Those 20 lbs will eventually go, and more still. But keeping it off requires motivation and focus. So remember how you feel now when the drugs start calling. Good luck!
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Old 06-25-2013, 09:52 AM   #6
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Originally Posted by suzanneyea View Post
This has happened to everyone else, lol.
Truth. lol
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Old 06-25-2013, 10:22 AM   #7
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Definitely. I'm glad you stopped it before you gained more than you lost. Look at it this way, you're still at a net loss of 10 pounds, which is the equivalent to carrying around 1.3 gallons of milk around all the time.

It's not a bragging point, but I am bad on the low carb train after gaining most of what I lost over 3 years.
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Old 06-25-2013, 10:54 AM   #8
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Welcome back to 'rehab'!!

It took me literally yrs. to get back and 100lbs. Originally lost to goal (55Lbs) and then took the jump off .... the struggle and physical toll it took makes me firmly planted on this side now!

Btw, it is not a failure but rather a lesson learned and a very important one at that. Most people (it seems) learn the best by going back to old ways. It makes one appreciate what is so good about low carb!

Last edited by clackley; 06-25-2013 at 10:58 AM..
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Old 06-25-2013, 10:55 AM   #9
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I feel your pain. I was less than 20 lbs to my goal and I had started with about 90 lbs to lose. Then I let it creep back on me over the last few years. I feel horrible and can't believe I lived well into the 200's for so long. I am "weighed down" by it all.

I'm back on track now and I'm wiser. See the image in my siggy and adopt it for yourself. Get back up, dust yourself off, take a deep breath and motor on. Nothing to be ashamed of, just learned from.
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Old 06-25-2013, 11:00 AM   #10
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A way of eating isnt a pass-fail and neither is weight loss, marriage, child rearing, friendships etc...its an ebb and flow. You lost ---you gained---now you will lose again and make better choices. Big deal. You are one meal away from learning and reaching a new goal.

Our sports teams do it all the time and we still refer to them as athletes even when then they never win a game!
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Old 06-25-2013, 11:10 AM   #11
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You haven't failed until you stop trying.
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Old 06-25-2013, 11:10 AM   #12
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Ten years ago, I did the first three phases of Atkins and probably lost 70 pounds. (I did not weigh back then).

I did not do Maintenance properly, by a long shot. My slow introduction of "good carbs" gave way over time to eating exactly as I had before I lost the weight. And guess what? All the weight came back, ALL of it.

A good 10 months of dietary work and 70 pounds lost - all undone because I somehow convinced myself that I could eat scones and potato chips and ice cream and cupcakes as much as I wanted. Because I ate them somewhat less than I used to. Despite my previous success and all that I had learned about my metabolism.

So yes, I understand your depression and feeling of failure. The day I finally convinced myself to get on the scale and assess the damage, I outright sobbed seeing the number.

I have decided that this time, though, is the last time. I am down 53 pounds, and although this time it is taking longer, I am okay with it. The weight IS coming off and more importantly I have made the choice to accept my insulin-resistant metabolism and commit to lifelong maintenance. I am not doing this again.

It will all work out for you. Be kind to yourself; there is no changing the past and beating yourself up does nothing.
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Old 06-25-2013, 11:20 AM   #13
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Many of us here can empathize with you I'm sure. But cheer up. RDBhan, smoosh and rndiane are right in their words of wisdom to you. We are all human, there will be obstacles, there will be disappoints, there will be failures and there will be setbacks. But just know, low carb is a woe. This isn't (or shouldn't be) a stimulant to try to reach some goal in 90 days, etc. but a practice that you can incorporate in your everyday life. Stay the course, keep your eyes and the prize, and most importantly know and believe that what you are doing WILL lead to change and WILL ultimately give you the results you are after. All the best on your continued journey.
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Old 06-25-2013, 11:27 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lose4life View Post
Now I am back on the wagon and determined to lose this weight.
This is all that matters!!!
You can do it!!!

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Old 06-25-2013, 11:51 AM   #15
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My best advice is to try not to think of it as "failing" or "succeeding" because both of those things only occur when you're DONE with something. Think of this as a lifestyle that is a work in progress.

But I know, I know, that is all easier said than done! Yes, it has happened to me too. I've lost sight of my priorities and my goals and gained some weight back. I'm actually currently working on this, my lowest weight was 185 pounds, then over the course of about a year I went back up to 220 pounds. But proud to say I'm currently down to 205 again! It is sometimes depressing, frustrating and hard, but you can't give up because that means you're accepting that your life will be that of an overweight, miserable, person. JUST KEEP GOING!!
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Old 06-25-2013, 11:51 AM   #16
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I never gained back while losing like you just did, but what I did was hit goal THEN slowly gained most of it back. either way you look at it, it just stinks.

and of course I am losing that same weight again right now

yes, everyone who has alot to lose most times has to lose it again. and maybe again, before we can handle the big changes it takes to tackle it long term.

great advice on the board for you. hang in there and that wagon you just jumped on will take you to goal!
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Old 06-25-2013, 11:56 AM   #17
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I agree with all the posters.
Can you analyze what caused you to fall off the wagon and devise a strategy for dealing with that when it comes up again? For example, was it just a feeling that you had reached a goal and underestimated how hard maintenance would be? Were you eating because of a stressful event in your life?
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Old 06-25-2013, 12:00 PM   #18
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You haven't failed - you lost 10 pounds!
Get back on track and you will be back at -30 in no time!
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Old 06-25-2013, 12:51 PM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RDBhan View Post
That's tough, sorry you're going through it. I was sorry when I went through it too. But, and here's the secret, it's a GREAT THING. Yes, I mean it. It's good to feel this sting, this regret, because it will keep you on track. Those 20 lbs will eventually go, and more still. But keeping it off requires motivation and focus. So remember how you feel now when the drugs start calling. Good luck!
Yes, as painful as it is.... I think there's truth in this. For me, I feel much more solid this second time around because I know how easy and quick it can be to gain it back, and how hard it is to get back on the wagon once you've fallen hard. I am not convinced it won't happen again but I do thing I learned from the last time.
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Old 06-25-2013, 12:53 PM   #20
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You learned a big lesson. I'm currently re-learning a similar 30 pound regain lesson.
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Old 06-25-2013, 01:20 PM   #21
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This has happened to me many times. Just don't give up. I think carbs is like alcohol, very hard to give up, but we all fall off the wagon sometimes. Just get back on.
It's never to late to start over again.
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Old 06-25-2013, 01:44 PM   #22
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Everyone has great advice. Thank you so much for the support. I can't look at the long road ahead or I will just throw in the towel. I will set short term goals for now and make this my way of life.
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Old 06-25-2013, 02:19 PM   #23
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It's not a failure, it's a learning experience, and we ALL have them.

So what did you learn from this?

Were you eating enough calories to be satisfied, were you eating enough fat? Did you have a plan in place to avoid carbs in unexpected situations? Did you ask for support from family and friends?

What do you need to change to ensure success this time?

Remember, you are only as far away from eating low carb as the next bite of food in your mouth. So if you blow it, get right back on plan. Don't punish yourself or let yourself go hungry because of it.
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Old 06-25-2013, 03:00 PM   #24
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I struggle everyday and I will continue to struggle. For what I am learning, this is a day-by-day, pound-by-pound exercise of discipline and self-restrain.
Hang in there, you will prevail at the end
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Old 06-25-2013, 08:53 PM   #25
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SweetSugaree View Post
This has happened to me many times. Just don't give up. I think carbs is like alcohol, very hard to give up, but we all fall off the wagon sometimes. Just get back on.
It's never to late to start over again.
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Old 06-25-2013, 09:22 PM   #26
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Remember:
Progress, not perfection is what matters.
It is a life long journey ahead.
The struggle is what makes it valuable.
Try to make sure there are many more good days than bad (eating habit-wise).

For me, when I end up cheating, I tend to binge and can gain 10 lbs or more in like 2 days off the wagon. At least some of it is water weight - -I tell myself, but it still takes a full week or more to get rid of it, and then longer to burn off the remaining fat gain.
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Old 06-25-2013, 09:30 PM   #27
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You are back, Theresa. By not giving up, shows a sign of a champion bound for success!
No one can be perfect all of the time; you are probably too hard on yourself. What would you tell your BFF in the same situation? Did you learn anything about yourself this time out?
Then the experience made you stronger, and as long as you don't give up, you will succeed. I've been morbidly obese for 30+ yrs before I had to admit I am a carb addict and had to ask for help. I did, learned, and am still learning a lot; and lost 235 pounds. I'm human like everyone else here who shares their story.
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Old 06-25-2013, 10:14 PM   #28
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Don't feel alone in this! Like so many others have posted, I also made the same mistakes. 10 years ago I lost 70 pounds and looked and felt great. Over time I slowly gained it all back, pretending like I hadn't because I wasn't a size 22 like before. When I couldn't fit into size 16-18 clothes I knew I was fooling myself and was pretty surprised to find I was the same start weight as before.

At least you realized with only a 20 pound gain! You're ahead of the game
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Old 06-26-2013, 01:53 AM   #29
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So sorry you are feeling down!

I have spent the last three years going up and down and falling off the wagon and getting back on. Every time I decide it's the last time, and every time it's not.
I'm just hoping this time it will stick!

Take one day at a time, we are right here with you on your journey! So many people here understand what you are going through. At least you can pat yourself on the back for getting back on the wagon and you still lost a total of 10lbs!!!!! Celebrate that and be proud that you made it back.

xxxx
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Old 06-26-2013, 05:13 AM   #30
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Previously lost pounds become more valuable each time you fall off the wagon.

In time, falling off the wagon becomes too expensive.
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