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Gibbs 03-14-2013 03:05 PM

Does your significant other...
 
My hubby has yet to mention anything about noticing the weight leaving. I take that back, he did notice in the boobies. :hyst: But nowhere else. Now I KNOW my butt has changed 'cause I can tell. Does your better half notice your weight loss and comment on it?

mom23kids 03-14-2013 03:20 PM

Yes, but he's the one who encouraged me to start losing and has been my cheerleader throughout my wl journey :) And I've gone down a cup size, to a puny size A, but dh has said he doesn't care cause my butt's gone from a size 14 to a size 6-he's ok with the tradeoff :laugh:

MtherGoos 03-14-2013 03:21 PM

Nope. Not at all. I've lost 100 pounds before, and he never says a word. Of course, he never says a word when I gain either so I guess I can't complain.

TheSouthernPrincess 03-14-2013 03:23 PM

He doesn't offer it on his own, if I ask he says yes or if I say "I feel like I'm smaller", he will say "Oh yeah, you definitely are! I can tell!". So I take what I can get :) Though a lady at work today told me I look great :)

raindroproses 03-14-2013 03:52 PM

Yes, and no... I never get comments directly about how I look now versus then or about how I look thinner from them because they've always been my biggest cheerleader and have always told me I was beautiful. So whenever I'm feeling down, it's always "You look amazing!" and whenever I'm feeling really good about my progress, I get agreed with and get told the same. It's just nice that way I think. It makes me realize what's really important to them, and that they'd love me no matter WHAT I looked like :)

Now from OTHER people I get LOTS of comments... and those are nice too! :laugh:

cfine 03-14-2013 04:37 PM

My sweet husband has loved me thru all sizes. He doesn't mention my weight loss unless I say something first. But then again, he never berated me or made me feel bad about myself when I was almost 300lbs either so I'm ok with it.

mamabear6 03-14-2013 07:13 PM

I think this can be subjective... if you're in a dysfunctional relationship like I am you're not likely going to be able to relate with people that are in normal relationships :lol: I laugh because I have to, otherwise I'd cry!
My husband has commented on weight gain, then adopts jealous behaviors when I lose weight(like recently). Comments on my loss of bust sizes, in not a nice way. We're separating.

haferchamp 03-14-2013 07:39 PM

mamabear6, you go girl!:clap:

GAVIV 03-14-2013 07:49 PM

Yes, I am lucky that my husband has always been supportive. Even when I was my heaviest he always told me he loves me the way I am. But he supports the efforts I made to lose weight to be happy with myself.

And he continues to make positive comments on my progress.

Avy 03-14-2013 08:44 PM

My BF tells me all the time that I look smaller, especially from behind lol. He loves me and my body no matter how much I weigh, but he's good about reminding me I've lost almost 50 lbs. :) Even the people at work comment regularly now. It is motivating.

Gibbs 03-15-2013 03:26 AM

He's proud of me sticking with it, doesn't offer me things I can't eat, not too often anyway. I just wanna hear something nice more often I guess. My biggest issue is when he grabs a roll of blubber and shakes it. I DESPISE THAT SO MUCH!! He knows it, yet he still does it.

Anyway, I guess I just need to hear good things now and then.

SweetMe678 03-15-2013 06:54 AM

I know what you are talking about, I like external validation as well! I think my DH is afraid that I'll loose in my boobies, he seems to be avoiding them. . .

He has commented a couple times that I look smaller from behind though.

I have one *friend* though, who always adds something to her comment "you look thinner, I hope your not starving yourself" or "Good for you that Atkins works, I hope you don't get malnourished". I have given up trying to explain to her that I have better nutrition eating this way, and gently steer the topic to other things.

@mamabear6 ~ My ex was like that. Not just about my weight either. My looks, my hair, my smarts etc. Took me two years after I left him to realize that our relationship was emotionally abusive. (not saying yours is) But I prefer to be with someone who is supportive of even my silliest projects. Anyway, HUGs, it is hard to be in a dysfunctional relationship, or even to be in the process of ending one.

Avy 03-15-2013 08:45 PM

LOL I thought my bf was the only one who did that... and he does it ALL THE TIME. I don't mind it though, at least I know he loves me like I am. :P

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gibbs (Post 16317009)
He's proud of me sticking with it, doesn't offer me things I can't eat, not too often anyway. I just wanna hear something nice more often I guess. My biggest issue is when he grabs a roll of blubber and shakes it. I DESPISE THAT SO MUCH!! He knows it, yet he still does it.

Anyway, I guess I just need to hear good things now and then.


Demonica 03-15-2013 11:23 PM

DH and DD were my biggest cheerleaders when I first started losing weight. DH was quick to comment on my "small, soft behind":o:love:. Even when I gained some weight back he never said anything. When I would complain about "trying to get back on track to lose the weight I had gained back" I always heard "you're not big. I know big, I was with BIG" (His ex was so enormous, that she had to lay down on the bed and he had to use grips to zip her pants up:hyst: I would have paid to see that!)

As far as comments from other people, I switched jobs 2 years ago so the people that I worked with when I first started losing haven't seen the difference lately.

mamabear6 03-15-2013 11:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SweetMe678 (Post 16317277)

@mamabear6 ~ My ex was like that. Not just about my weight either. My looks, my hair, my smarts etc. Took me two years after I left him to realize that our relationship was emotionally abusive. (not saying yours is) But I prefer to be with someone who is supportive of even my silliest projects. Anyway, HUGs, it is hard to be in a dysfunctional relationship, or even to be in the process of ending one.

Thank you for sharing that with me. I was in an abusive relationship and dealing with similar problems, and I am glad it's ending! I feel so much better now and it's such a nice feeling to be happy to wake up in the morning and not have all the excess stress! I hear ya, I still don't quite understand how my being intelligent, attractive, and confident was such a huge threat to him. We certainly don't need people like that in our lives! :hugs:

mamabear6 03-15-2013 11:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gibbs (Post 16317009)
My biggest issue is when he grabs a roll of blubber and shakes it. I DESPISE THAT SO MUCH!! He knows it, yet he still does it.

Anyway, I guess I just need to hear good things now and then.

WOW. My STB ex did that to me once...Over the summer when we didn't have a lot of money (had to eat carby stuff)... grabbed and shook my stomach. I am hoping this isn't abusive behavior you're talking about? :sad:

avid 03-16-2013 12:23 AM

My wife is obsessed with weight. She gets on the scale in the morning and it can make or break her day. She is thin and petite.
She has commented on my weight loss, but I'm not sure she is really happy about it.
I sometimes suspect that she feels something like "Your being thin makes me feel fat"
crazy right? but that's the vibe I get.

Gibbs 03-16-2013 03:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mamabear6 (Post 16318759)
I am hoping this isn't abusive behavior you're talking about? :sad:

No it sure isn't!! I have ZERO tolerance for that! I own a gun, I know how to use it, and he knows it too! He bought it for me :D

Just Russ 03-16-2013 07:13 AM

I occasionally had to help my EX zip up with vise grips while she laid on the bed... so much for all her wasted time going to WWs. :jumpjoy: It turned out I was on the wrong side of that abusive relationship. (And I caught her cheating.) I was fit healthy then. After all these years, still a dark place... better I not go there.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Demonica (Post 16318752)
DH and DD were my biggest cheerleaders when I first started losing weight. DH was quick to comment on my "small, soft behind":o:love:. Even when I gained some weight back he never said anything. When I would complain about "trying to get back on track to lose the weight I had gained back" I always heard "you're not big. I know big, I was with BIG" (His ex was so enormous, that she had to lay down on the bed and he had to use grips to zip her pants up:hyst: I would have paid to see that!)

As far as comments from other people, I switched jobs 2 years ago so the people that I worked with when I first started losing haven't seen the difference lately.


avid 03-16-2013 07:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by flagman1776 (Post 16319027)
I occasionally had to help my EX zip up with vise grips while she laid on the bed... so much for all her wasted time going to WWs. :jumpjoy: It turned out I was on the wrong side of that abusive relationship. (And I caught her cheating.) I was fit healthy then. After all these years, still a dark place... better I not go there.

I was in that dark place you speak of for years.
After a long talk with my son, I decided to forgive....everyone,
including myself AND my ex.
It has brought me peace and I can truly love again.
Wishing you all happiness.

Ntombi 03-16-2013 10:18 AM

I just want to offer a gentle reminder: we have people of all sizes on this board, and some people reading this might be hurt at the thought of a poster laughing at someone who was "so enormous" that they needed help getting dressed. I know it's meant to be in good humor, but laughing at someone because they're larger and may have struggles that come along with that doesn't always feel benign, especially on a weight loss support board.

I hope you understand where I'm coming from. I really wouldn't want anyone to feel turned off and leave without the support they need.

janetsbreeze 03-16-2013 11:03 AM

My SO has loved my through all my sizes and I am truly blessed in that.
We both struggle with our weight and are each others biggest cheerleaders.

ChristiansMom 03-16-2013 12:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ntombi (Post 16319239)
I just want to offer a gentle reminder: we have people of all sizes on this board, and some people reading this might be hurt at the thought of a poster laughing at someone who was "so enormous" that they needed help getting dressed. I know it's meant to be in good humor, but laughing at someone because they're larger and may have struggles that come along with that doesn't always feel benign, especially on a weight loss support board.

I hope you understand where I'm coming from. I really wouldn't want anyone to feel turned off and leave without the support they need.

Well said Ntombi. Weight is a sensitive issue and many here are struggling with those very situations. I'm glad some of you have never or will never have to deal with this but have a little heart for those who have.

Kittee 03-16-2013 02:00 PM

Mine does, he'll just be like "You're lookin thin!!" He too does Atkins/low carb.

A&F 03-17-2013 07:24 AM

I don't think mine notices, but then he is gone for weeks at a time and I think he's just happy to see me when he gets home. I hope he notices this time though, I'm down almost twenty pounds from the last time he saw me.

Tammy2002 03-17-2013 07:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ntombi (Post 16319239)
I just want to offer a gentle reminder: we have people of all sizes on this board, and some people reading this might be hurt at the thought of a poster laughing at someone who was "so enormous" that they needed help getting dressed. I know it's meant to be in good humor, but laughing at someone because they're larger and may have struggles that come along with that doesn't always feel benign, especially on a weight loss support board.

I hope you understand where I'm coming from. I really wouldn't want anyone to feel turned off and leave without the support they need.

I agree.

lterry913 03-17-2013 09:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ntombi (Post 16319239)
I just want to offer a gentle reminder: we have people of all sizes on this board, and some people reading this might be hurt at the thought of a poster laughing at someone who was "so enormous" that they needed help getting dressed. I know it's meant to be in good humor, but laughing at someone because they're larger and may have struggles that come along with that doesn't always feel benign, especially on a weight loss support board.

I hope you understand where I'm coming from. I really wouldn't want anyone to feel turned off and leave without the support they need.

I understand where you are coming from...but I have known people who were a size 2 or 4 and used coat hangers and pliers to zip up their pants because they actually like them that tight...not my idea of a good time, but it can go both ways.

here's to hoping that no one would be poking fun at others problems here.

baileygirl3 03-17-2013 10:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lterry913 (Post 16320637)
I understand where you are coming from...but I have known people who were a size 2 or 4 and used coat hangers and pliers to zip up their pants because they actually like them that tight...not my idea of a good time, but it can go both ways.

here's to hoping that no one would be poking fun at others problems here.

I remember a time when I was determined to not go up a size in jeans that I literally would lay down in bed, push my feet against the wall and zip my smaller jeans, this is myself I am talking about, not making fun of anyone here...lol!!! Just remembering something about myself when that was said. I did not want to go up a size, this was before I knew LC eating.

Demonica 03-17-2013 02:48 PM

I wasn't meaning a bad way toward anyone in general, I was talking about a woman who willingly and knowingly wore pants that were 2 sizes too small for her and refused to buy bigger pants, forcing her SO to zip her up with vice grips because she couldn't do it herself. No offense meant towards anyone here.

Gibbs 03-17-2013 04:00 PM

And there have been many a time where I've had to lay down to zip the britches too! Dad calls it "5&10", looks like I'm trying to stuff 10 pounds of crap into a 5 pound bag. :hyst:


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