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-   -   Sometimes you gotta put YOU ahead of the family... (http://www.lowcarbfriends.com/bbs/main-lowcarb-lobby/796750-sometimes-you-gotta-put-you-ahead-family.html)

mainemom 02-09-2013 08:57 AM

Sometimes you gotta put YOU ahead of the family...
 
I've been pretty proud of myself the past month or so. Not because I've been totally compliant with my carbs, or even lost much weight. In fact, for the last half of 2012, I'd gotten kinda kinda lazy and complacent after reaching goal and have paid the price with weight gain and just not feeling so good. But recently I've re-committed to ME, physically and emotionally.

During that lax period, I stayed away from LC Friends, because I felt ashamed and hypocritical. But toward the end of December, I clicked on the Main LC Lobby, started reading again, bit the bullet, and began - cautiously - posting and regaining wisdom again.

So back to my title: so many of us put our families wants/needs ahead of our own. Those of us nurturers do this constantly and without thinking, often at the detriment of our own needs/health. I decided in January (not really a resolution, more a re-dedication to my health) that I need to do what's best for me food-wise, and in the long run, best for the family too. I've been cooking up a storm and trying out a lot of new LC recipes. So I cook something rather exotic to my family's tastes, and I love it, but them not so much. So what? They're not starving. 95% of the time the food I prepare, always LC for the main/meat portion of the meal, is food they have learned to enjoy, even without the mixed in carbs, breading, etc. I always prepare a carb side for the husband and teenagers (potatoes, pasta or rice) and always include at least one vegetable, but often two, carby and lower carb. For Super Bowl Sunday we had no guests over, just the 4 of us, but I cooked up a huge appetizer feast. Our habit in the past has been to have fun, appetizer-y meals for Super Bowl or when we're watching a special TV event. I made amazing jalapeno poppers, cauliflower breadsticks, spinach stuffed mushrooms, chicken tenders baked in hot wing sauce, fresh veggies with Ranch and guacamole (didn't make that, though), topped off with amazingly good mini cheesecakes. I also supplemented for the others some non-LC frozen honey BBQ wings and fried cheese sticks. Everyone was happy, liked some stuff but not others, but there was A LOT OF FOOD! I happily ate the leftovers for the next few days.

The other night, I made a new recipe, Thai Chicken Skewers with Spicy Peanut Sauce. I couldn't stop eating it, but the rest of the family was kinda so-so to them. But so what! I have to consider what they want/need all the time, yes, but ALSO what I want/need. I can have my LC meals and can slightly modify for them, but I refuse to cook separate meals. They need to see that I can stick to something for myself that is good for me physically and emotionally. I want my kids to someday remember that their mom took care of herself - not at their expense - but found a balance between family and herself.

I'm still struggling, but feeling better every day and slowly dropping the extra pounds I’d gained after making goal last summer. Any new way of eating that is out of the norm is not always an easy route to follow. But it's been 2 years now for me LC, and I know this way of eating is healthiest for my body and makes me feel best emotionally and physically. Additionally, I’ve decided to not feel guilty about giving myself chunks of “me” time when I find a spare moment, instead of feeling I have to always be doing something for the family’s welfare.

For those of you out there who truly want to adopt a LC lifestyle but think they can't while also trying to raise and feed a family, think again. It can be done, and if the family *****es and moans a bit, tell them to suck it up! They are fed (quite well) and can't always have what they want, but sometimes it isn't always just about them. Sound selfish? It's not. It's the best gift we can give our families - they get to keep us around happy and healthy (plus learning a bit of self-sacrifice and tolerance along the way - I hope)!

tymom 02-09-2013 09:13 AM

love it!

shawneesioux 02-09-2013 12:02 PM

Excellent post!

(where's the *like* button ?!?) lol

I'm betting your stance will be positive reinforcement for others in the same family situation.

Erin57 02-09-2013 01:17 PM

:goodpost:

I don't have any kids at home but DH has a debit card and a working vehicle if he doesn't like what is cooked/bought.

We have changed our diets a lot over the past few years. He still drags in some stuff from time to time and I still fix some carby things. They are a small percentage compared to the good fat, meat and veggies that we now eat.

He has not dropped any weight at all but hasn't found any either. Everyone is his family is morbidly obese and has diabetes. He could stand to lose maybe 30 lbs. He just had his 1 year checkup at the Dr. The Doc told him whatever he is doing, keep doing it. All his bloodwork was perfect!! Everything that was an issue last time was in line.

Sometimes Mamma just knows best.

Spanilingo 02-09-2013 01:26 PM

I so agree. You know how they tell you on a plane to put on your oxygen mask FIRST so you can help your kids?

I agree. Teaching your children to love them themselves by showing them how you care for yourself is the greatest gift you give them.

cfine 02-09-2013 02:53 PM

I wish we had a like button!

JessieBear 02-09-2013 03:53 PM

Do you have a recipe for the spicy thai peanut sauce? I have been craving peanut sauce chicken.

Thanks!

giJ 02-09-2013 05:06 PM

I was rolling right through your post, cheering you on, til I read this:

Quote:

Originally Posted by mainemom (Post 16249621)
cauliflower breadsticks

At which point, I think I actually heard the sound of screeching brakes.

Recipe? Please? :)

Oh, yeah, and GO YOU! Take care of yourself, first and foremost!

reddarin 02-09-2013 07:13 PM

Welp, I dunno about all the squishy stuff but I'd go farther. I am totally on board with an LC or starve menu plan for them heh. *The* best most healthy way to eat is LC :)

Luckyone2934 02-10-2013 06:25 AM

:goodpost:

I'm feeling exactly the same way these days.

sfmom 02-10-2013 03:06 PM

:goodpost: Life isn't always about everyone else, as women we need to learn to put ourselves first - I am so happy for you that you are doing that and setting a good example for your children and you are right they can suck it up LOL

mainemom 02-10-2013 03:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JessieBear (Post 16250265)
Do you have a recipe for the spicy thai peanut sauce? I have been craving peanut sauce chicken.

Thanks!

JessieBear - you can find this recipe on Linda's Sue's recipe site. Google "Linda's low carb" and you'll find it. The recipes are called, "Chutatip's Chicken Satay," and "Chutatip's Peanut Sauce." VERY, VERY good!

By the way, my daughter (the more adventurous eater) is named Jessie!

mainemom 02-10-2013 03:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by giJ (Post 16250367)
I was rolling right through your post, cheering you on, til I read this:



At which point, I think I actually heard the sound of screeching brakes.

Recipe? Please? :)

Oh, yeah, and GO YOU! Take care of yourself, first and foremost!

giJ: The cauliflower breadsticks, and so many other great recipes, can be found on "Your Lighter Side" blog. LCF member Cleochatra writes this blog and she is both informative, inspirational and hilarious!

And thanks for the "cheering on!"

Tracey

dee 02-10-2013 03:37 PM

@giJ you can find cauliflower breadsticks on Jamie Van Eaton's blog. Google your lighter side. She has tons of LC recipes. I've tried a few. They were all excellent.

JessieBear 02-11-2013 03:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mainemom (Post 16251832)
JessieBear - you can find this recipe on Linda's Sue's recipe site. Google "Linda's low carb" and you'll find it. The recipes are called, "Chutatip's Chicken Satay," and "Chutatip's Peanut Sauce." VERY, VERY good!

By the way, my daughter (the more adventurous eater) is named Jessie!

Thanks!!

zombiegoat2000 02-11-2013 04:16 PM

Bout time someone on here gets a backbone and stands up to their family! Seriously, back in the 50's whatever the wife made for dinner was what was eaten no ifs, ands or buts about it! Unless you run a restaraunt out of your house or there are other dietary needs there is absolutely no reason why you shold be cooking 20 different meals! Take care of business mainemom!:goodpost:

Susann 02-11-2013 04:45 PM

What a great post-you deserve a Elvis for that!!!!:sing:


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