Committing carb-ocide?

[Cavegirl]

I would just like to fess up basically.

Even though a low carb diet gives me great energy levels, balanced moods, weight loss, good immunity and a stack of other pros....

And even though i really enjoy low carb foods and dont even have a sweet tooth....

And even though i have read all the books and studies and fully understand the long term health benefits of this WOE....

I still commit a crazed and rather unladylike carbocide with some regularity....

.....i feel like i must eat the forbidden fruit (whatever that might be) and no matter how great i feel about myself, how in control i feel about the WOE, it's as if i become possessed by some psychopathic binge eating crazy lady and before you know it i'm shovelling in handful of low grade carbs and then not only feeing physically awful afterwards, but mentally and emotionally wrecked too.

I'm not a loon, i'm a (relatively) normal person, with a good job, a stable, loving relationship, great friends and on a day to day basis, i'm happy....

....but yet i act in such a degrading and self sabotaging way sometimes?

Just wondering who else out there feels that way and might feel better for sharing? And if anyone has got over this kind of vicious cycle and has advise, it would greatly appreciated!

[vanilla_latte]

Um .. I think I could have written your post. I've low carbed alot during this year, but not all so I don't consider myself a true "low carber" yet, but working on it. Because I am an extremely slow loser and frustration sets in, I do occasionally commit carbocide. :blush:

So, you're not alone!

[beth719]

You are not alone! I recently rewarded my weight loss with a carb-o-thon that lasted 3 weeks I'm back on track but everyday is a constant struggle even when I know that I feel better, have increased energy, and lose weight if I would just stick with it

[babykinz]

Ummm Hello?

Ive been on and off LC since 1994...

I mess up, I gain...I go back.

I used to feel shameful because there are so many cheat-free people here but I don't care anymore.
This is my life, my body , my choices.
If I want a Lava Crunch cake ...I have one...so it puts my weight loss behind schedule...sooooo what. Yes I am sick for a few days afterwards and have no one to blame but myself... Its my choice.
If I am goood 25 days a month and want to be naughty for 5...Great!
All my choices....and I refuse to feel guilty or bad about...

WOW! that did feel good!:blush:

[micheleredit]

I feel ya!! After a 15 pound weight gain and feeling like absolute crap I am back!!! Today is day one and I am hoping that this sticks this time!!

[sistertzu]

I have done this a time or two too!!! But alas I am doing it for my health and won't quit. I have no choice if I want to live long and happy, lovingly caring for my family.

Sis

[Ilpirata]

yeah. i was absolutely one hundred percent cheat free for my first eighteen months low carb. In the last six months I've comitted carb-o-cide at least three times... for me it absolutely comes from FRUSTRATION at my slow (read that as NO) loss lately. I've weathered stalled before without cheating but this last one... well...

PS - don't you just LOVE the carbocide scene in Bruno? I laughed as hard as I have ever laughed in my ENTIRE LIFE!!!!! I think only true low carbers would get it but it killed me. killed me.

[stargirl21]

I can totally relate. It has been and will be a lifelong struggle for me. I just remind myself that every bite is a chance to regain control.

[momof9]

how i figure it if we fall 100 times its all good if we get up 101 times. we have to live with this way of life and if we fall just get up and start again don't let it become 5 years start again right away.

[NewStartNow]

I must be your twin

[Aptos Gal]

I love that term. Carb-o-cide! Every couple of months I will do this for a few days, and then get back to it. As already said, it is the getting back to it that is important.

[Looweewoo]

I do it, and for me carbocide might literally mean death.

In other addictions I have learned that relapse is one of the symptoms, not something to be ashamed of. It's a physical response coupled with a mental obsession that is, for the most part, beyond our control.

If we can deal with the physical part, that's a big help, but we still have to deal with the obsession. Since everywhere we turn advertisement and friends and everything else in our culture is trying to trigger our obsession, it's no wonder that we suddenly find ourselves all messed up again.

That's where support groups are crucial, IMO. Unless we have a habit of checking in and asking for help, when the obsession hits, we won't have anywhere to turn. I tell my guys that unless they call me when they don't need to, they won't call me when they do need to.

So I'm posting here every day, several times a day (I'm retired), and trying to become an active part of this community. It's what will keep my diet free of carbs, HFCS, gluten, legumes and all the other things that age and the SAD have made into poison for me.

[flatferenghi]

we all need to be put away, SOMEPLACE, like Norman Bates. or, perhaps, we need to find low carb substitutes for the the stuff that we crave. Either way, problem solved. Love & Profits: FLATFERENGHI

[ab1ht]

I go through this cycle literally every day.

I eat a great breakfast and lunch. Then evening sets in...

I get by with just frying up some tater tots (my weakness) and occasionally have a drink. But I really need to figure something out. I'd be interested to see the other posts.

[Looweewoo]

Paul, I don't mean to diminish your struggle but rather to understand it. Why is it that a person who had less than 20 lbs to lose and lost it, a thin man in good health who runs marathons and appears to have met all his goals... why can't he have a few tater tots if he wants them?

I mean, OK, maybe switch over to actual potatoes, maybe those nice small red potatoes, cut in quarters and fried in butter with a little salt and black pepper, but (and please remember I'm asking not telling) can't you have those if you want them?

Unless you're talking half a bag of tots, it seems like an allowable indulgence. Of course, I understand that if it's outside the standards you have set for yourself, you regret going there, I'm just curious.

[Jonahsafta]

been there ..done that....hate it too

[SarahAnne717]

I can totally relate!!! You are not alone.

Without going into all the details, after losing all my baby weight a couple years ago being really strict low carb for over 3 months(down to 140), I became a horrible binge eater. If I ate bad, it was REALLY bad. I'd eat until I was in physical agony and emotional hell. Then I'd try and be good for awhile, I was in an extremely viscous cycle 145-155# up and down too many times in a short period of time. Like you mentioned, I was self-sabotaging. I felt hopeless about ever feeling normal again.

I knew I needed help for myself and for my husband and son. I went for counseling for several months, sacrificing my weight going up to 172 by not dieting during that time to learn why I binged and how to control it. I actually had almost nothing to do with food and more to do with issues I would bury and never deal with! After working through a lot of things and getting some good tools, including surrounding myself with supportive friends, I was ready to try and get the weight off.

I've made it down 20 pounds in the last year since I left counseling. I still binge occasionally, but it's never as bad and never lasts as long. I think a big thing is that if I do eat something bad, I try not to let the guilt lead me down the path of further bad eating. I just get up and try again. I also use it as a gauge to let me know if there is something bothering me that I need to deal with and I'm using food as my outlet instead. When I recognize why I'm doing it, it's a little easier to stop.

I'm not saying that you need counseling, of course. I just want to let you know that you are not the only one struggling and if it really bothers you, there is hope for change, something I never thought possible.

Before I write a book on here, I'll stop

But if you're curious for more details or want to talk, let me know.

Good luck to you!

[ab1ht]

Originally Posted by Looweewoo

Paul, I don't mean to diminish your struggle but rather to understand it. Why is it that a person who had less than 20 lbs to lose and lost it, a thin man in good health who runs marathons and appears to have met all his goals... why can't he have a few tater tots if he wants them?

Sorry for the threadjack, but Louis started it...

These are fair questions and there are two general answers:

1. There is no finish line. Yeah, it's a running cliche, but it's true. While I've met my original goals, I know I can do better. I look OK in clothes, but once they come off it's like, "Um, maybe I should put them back on." Sorry for the mental picture. I really could go down another 5 or so.

2. My bigger issue is that "once in a while" quickly turns into every night. Alcohol and taters every night is not a healthy habit.

Hope that answers your questions. And thanks for asking.

[Looweewoo]

That sure does. The vanity issue is an imponderable that only you can ponder and yes, I see that if it's every night, that's a different story.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled thread.

[Indychick829]

delete this meant to be a new thread. sorry.

[Cavegirl]

I felt better just for getting it out, i've only just started posting again on LCF's after months of radio silence, because i just felt really rubbish and guilty about carb bingeing!

It's been really helpful to read everyone else's struggles, so thank you all.

Even though i know deep down, i'm not the only one doing it, i still feel less alone with it by reading all the posts here and somehow feel like less of a freak!

[fishmonger]

Originally Posted by babykinz

Ummm Hello?

Ive been on and off LC since 1994...

I mess up, I gain...I go back.

I used to feel shameful because there are so many cheat-free people here but I don't care anymore.
This is my life, my body , my choices.
If I want a Lava Crunch cake ...I have one...so it puts my weight loss behind schedule...sooooo what. Yes I am sick for a few days afterwards and have no one to blame but myself... Its my choice.
If I am goood 25 days a month and want to be naughty for 5...Great!
All my choices....and I refuse to feel guilty or bad about...

WOW! that did feel good!:blush:

I just LOVE this babykinz!! For me, im 36 and have ONLY JUST recently realised that I have choices in my life - Ive always been a "yes" person...........yes too everyone else that is

So there ya go legrandeginge - you are not alone - I am firmly convinced that humans have some sort of built in self destructive streak, and its not until you can accept this and embrace it that you can move on and, more importantly, make your choice as to HOW YOU DEAL WITH IT. We are HUMAN, we aint robots, and we make mistakes - its how we deal with them that count...................good luck and bravo for realising how you are going wrong - thats half the battle y'know

xx

[Big Kahuna 13]

Originally Posted by legrandeginge

I felt better just for getting it out, i've only just started posting again on LCF's after months of radio silence, because i just felt really rubbish and guilty about carb bingeing!

It's been really helpful to read everyone else's struggles, so thank you all.

Even though i know deep down, i'm not the only one doing it, i still feel less alone with it by reading all the posts here and somehow feel like less of a freak!

Carb-o-holic carb-o-cider extraordinaire checking in!!!

I've been away since May for the same reason. I lost 50 and was proudly on my way to 80 lbs when I hit "SUMMER" lol

I will go dig up my post and add info there - sorry for the threadjack, thanks for posting.

[way2fluffy]

WHAT!!!!
You mean to tell us "You are Human???!!!"

here all this time I thought we were perfect...........

[ny_shelly]

I have been a binge eater since I was in about 9th grade - so that would make it about 30 years or so.

Since I've "restarted" July 18 (this is week 11) I have had a few "legal" food binges (overeating when I know I'm not hungry and deep down I know I'm emotional eating) and 2 full fledge day and a half binges. The last one was this past Sunday night and Monday.

Both times I binged out I was able to come back, which is unusual, because normally I go into hiding and keep bingeing for several months.

But I think I've adopted a similar attitude as babykinz - well not exactly the same - b/c I don't say "screw it I'm eating this" but I am being more forgiving and realizing that if my weight loss schedule is thrown off - who cares - not the end of the world.

I am still working on preventing a binge. I face the challenge every day so I think I am successful 90% of the time. I use techniques like changing what I'm thinking about, distraction, doing other things instead.

But sometimes I feel such great stress and anxiety I "feel" like eating is the only cure to relieve the pain.

That is the problem - this is not true. Sitting here right now I can feel completely confident that binge eating is not the solution. The problem occurs when your emotional self takes over your logical self and your brain is telling you that a binge is the only thing that will work.

I'm still working on that process. I am sad that sometimes things are so painful to me that food is my only comfort. From what I understand, a lot of that feeling is conditioning, and if you can break the cycle and relearn a new habit you can be free of the association of "extreme stress" means "binge eat".

Keep working on it and never give up. Be kind to yourself when you don't quite make it and congratulate yourself when you do.

[Big Kahuna 13]

Yep, I know we're not perfect. But my new improved commitment is to come back strong when I slip.

No more turning one bad meal into an excuse to go for a day/week/month (or worse) of being bad.

REBORN HARDCORE!

[francine]

Originally Posted by micheleredit

I feel ya!! After a 15 pound weight gain and feeling like absolute crap I am back!!! Today is day one and I am hoping that this sticks this time!!

same here. We go out so much, alot of parties and events this past summer and it was hard to stick to low carb. But fall is here and alot of those tempting events are ended, so it's back to being serious. I can't believe I gained so fast. Just hope I can lose it fast!

[Cavegirl]

nyshelly thanks so much for your honest and heart felt post. For me, i know it's emotional eating and conditioning. But i guess the good news there is then hope for change as you say, thanks!

fishmonger hell yes to the inbuilt self destructive streak and need for acceptance, i think that is why i felt i wanted to start this thread in the first place...so that it wasn't some dirty festering secret anymore! thanks for your post!

and thanks again to everyone, this conversation really helps to keep me clean eating!!

[Butternut]

It's like my brain disconnects sometimes and I carb out, later hating myself, sick and sleepy. I am an addict...soooo stupid.