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Old 05-17-2006, 09:40 AM   #91
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Congrats. Your post made my eyes teary cuz I am really struggling with the binge eating right now.

You have some great suggestions that I have heard a million times but need to try. Journalling and using the carb ladder once I reach goal instead of congradulating my self with a binge party.
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Old 05-17-2006, 12:05 PM   #92
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Thank you all so much for your kinds words! I actually have decided that I reached goal a few pounds later, lol! and am trying to figure out how to maintain now.

I jumped back in to mention two things to you Brilliant, that I looked in your siggy and saw that you are trying a low calorie low fat plan for a three day stint. I just wanted to share with you, that if you suffer from binge eating, any plan that is based on very low quantities, chances are you are going to drop yourself right into the binge-restrict-binge cycle. A more moderate approach to getting "back on plan" seems to work better for binge eaters .. from what I've read.

The other thing, you do not have to wait until goal to start the Carb Ladder. I lost weight consistently while going up the Carb Ladder. And, going up the Carb ladder helped me feel inside that I was eating well ... that helped contribute to my ability to stop my own binge-restrict-binge cycle which was out of control last summer.

Anyhow, I hope you don't mind my sharing. It is only one person's opinion - from my own experience and the books I've read on binge and compulsive eating.

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Old 05-22-2006, 11:52 AM   #93
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Thanks SO MUCH for sharing your story. Seems we can't really reach maintenance until we deal with the pain that kept us heavy in the first place.....
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Old 06-15-2006, 03:26 PM   #94
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Your story is a true inspiration of what hard work and determination can do. I so pray I can be a success story like you. Thanks for sharing and letting others know how possible it really is to take control of your life and body.
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Old 06-29-2006, 04:07 PM   #95
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I read what you shared with Alex...and then read your amazing story. WOW WOW WOW very motivating for me!
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Old 06-29-2006, 05:04 PM   #96
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Pauline~ I don't know how I missed this post back in April!!!!

Thanks for being such an inspiration to all of us here. You look amazing and have taken control of your body. Congrats to you! You ROCK!!!!

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Old 06-29-2006, 05:21 PM   #97
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Pauline - thank you so much for taking the time to share your story in such a thoughtful and complete way! I could relate to so many parts of it, and I congratulate you for taking control of your life and your health - you are an inspiration!
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Old 06-29-2006, 06:39 PM   #98
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[COLOR=Magenta]WOW, what an inspiration, I printed it out and will carry your story with me. Thank you for your wonderfully written insights. [/COLOR]
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Old 06-29-2006, 08:09 PM   #99
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AMAZING story! Thank you so much for sharing!
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Old 09-30-2006, 08:39 PM   #100
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Thank you for sharing this story. You may have helped save my life. I relate so much to your struggles. As I read it I now know things I have to do to overcome my journey. This was a hard day for me but reading your story has given me new hope. Thanks again.
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Old 09-30-2006, 09:02 PM   #101
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Has ANYONE heard from Pauline? She's been MIA for a while.
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Old 09-30-2006, 09:30 PM   #102
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If you wouldn't have asked "Where's Pauline" I probably would have never read her story.

Thank you Pauline. I wish I could stop bingeing. Why? Why do I do it? How did you find the strenght and the wisdom to find out why, and how to stop it?

I started atkins on Tues, and Fri Night, I said the heck with it, and I've binged all day long on carbs. I was feeling so good, and I screwed it up.

You are such an inspiration. I saw myself in your post.
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Old 10-01-2006, 04:13 AM   #103
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Pauline.....where are you???? We miss you terribly!!!
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Old 10-01-2006, 06:10 AM   #104
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you are AMAZING! Thank you for posting your story!
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Old 10-01-2006, 06:17 AM   #105
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Noone has found her yet?
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Old 10-01-2006, 07:07 AM   #106
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Nope, not that I know of
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Old 10-01-2006, 07:15 AM   #107
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What a beautiful story. So inspirational. Thanks.
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Old 10-01-2006, 07:19 AM   #108
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thanks and come back!

Hey Pauline, (and all who read...)

It appears you haven't logged in for while. I also am visiting here for the first time in almost a year (well, i may have logged in....but havent really been lowcarbing for almost a year). Im going to use your amazing story, and this situation- to maybe help bring you back.. where ever you may be... plus- we need to keep this story bumped b/c it is inspiring to say the least.

I think you probobly remember me.... as ive been posting here for years. I even accomplished a huge life goal for me and wrote a low carb cookbook last year that I self published. I am going now to expose some private things- in hope that you will come back, or maybe others can lift me out of this time I am in...This is two years of venting and frustration, so i am sorry if it is too long.

My journey on low carb has always been a rocky one. Never really smooth.. I have always been slightly jealous of those who could eat "clean" for months, or years at a time. I am weak and food, sugar etc has a power over me. My lowest weight, on my wedding day, was apx 123-4. (i didnt actually weigh in on my wedding day of course, but i maybe even hit 120 as i was barely eating anything for a few weeks due to extreme nervousness/pre-wedding insomnia!)

To get to that wedding weight, i did low carb, completely modified. It was my own version, and not the healthiest. However, i was willing to do WHATEVER it took. I basically ate two meals a day, for weeks. I ate low carb special K w/ milk for breakfast, and a McDonalds chicken salad for lunch (near the end, that was ALL i was eating) prior i would vary my two meals- breakfast might be eggs, and lunch- a different salad w/ some kind of chicken... And, when dinner time rolled around i would just plan my wedding, and my now hubbie, who was always out on appts for work at his old job, would eat out w/o me... and I would maybe have some S/F candy or soda to tie me over. Or Dentyne Fire gum.... yum. But- i knew this wasnt healthy (and was very stinky some nights when DH got home.. LOL...) but i was losing so much weight, and it wasnt that painful at the time(now- i cant even do low carb period....)

OK -- fast forward past my wedding, and all events leading up to it (the most amazing, but stressful time of my life - but i was proud. I was receiving compliments- "How did you do it" even at my bridal shower)..

Then- they honeymoon. DH and I were on cloud 9. We went to Niagara Falls, Cananda. We had a blast. It was awesome (were supposed to go on a cruise, but i actually walked off the ship due to non-cleanliness and the bad vibes i felt on it... crazy- another story for another day)... but each day in our hotel, i tried to eat healthy, but not having a scale, i didnt realize i was gaining. And, b/c i was eating barely anything before the big day, my body was storing alot of fat. We walked and walked, but despite the excercize, i ate too badly, and put on over 10 pounds that week. I came home, and told myself (sadly) that i probably will never be able to get to that low weight again, b/c i never want to go back to thise extreme measures of eating again. So- that was the start of a gain.

That was in 2004. Over the past two years- i have had ups and downs ... our marriage has not been easy to say the least. Dh and i lived in a beautiful condo that we bought a few months after our marriage (lived w/ the in-laws until then...yikes.. and i still do now... double yikess), and we lived in that condo for a year. It was a crazy year. The tenant below made it hell for us, and despite how much i loved the condo, we sold. Despite searching the world over for a house, i couldnt find one suitable (prices are insane here in New England)... we looked all around, but i was scared to buy again, for many reasons. So, we (very reluctantly) moved back in w/ the in-laws. I haven't felt married since. That was over a year ago.

During the time we lived in the condo, i maintained between 130-140... I wasnt terribly upset about that, (looking back, i wish i was there) and I even wrote a low carb cookbook, as i love to cook, with my sister, who will graduate in march from the Culinary Institue of America! So obviously my family loves food and all aspects of it.

My cookbook didnt get finalized or published until i was already living w/ my in-laws. So, they offered to allow me to have a Book Launch party at their house (a very large, beautiful house)... it was a great turn out. I even had a local news editor feature my story in the local paper. It was really cool. However, half of my family didnt come to support me. I was mainly friends, and church friends, and neighbors, not really family. I felt totally insulted. I was really and still am, somewhat PO'd that they wouldnt come to support me. I have lived near all my family for my whole life. And, i have NO idea why they dont support me, but it made me mad, and turned me somewhat against low carbing (not immediately but it ate at me... and made me feel actually embaressed for writing a cookbook, which took YEARS to do, and even features some recipes that you all have actually emailed to me to put in the book!).

That was about a year ago. Since then, alot has changed. We DID finally buy a house, down the road from my inlaws, and also down the road from my parents. ( I wonder if its too close? we will find out soon!)This house has been our project for 9 months now, kind of like our "babY" so to speak. We have literally gutted rooms, and remodeled the whole thing, and we are finally going to move w/in a month from now... DH has promised. But, being we also started down a brand new career path (we started a hub. and wife mortgage business, and i am a part time realtor) weve had so much on our plate. Too much for us young newleyweds.... all this, plus the stress of living w/ the inlaws meant that many times we would go out to eat. Who am i kidding? We eat out 3 times a day. The problem started b/c we both have been working on our house daily for months. We cant eat at the house b/c there hasnt been anything close to a kitchen for along time, and we both work such an appetite up doing all that manual labor (things i never dreamed i could do) that we just go out to eat, and get fast food daily. McD's for breakfast, with the whole works, and a Sub for lunch, with chips, and Wendys for dinner (chicken snadwich, fries and a frosty)!!! I had actaully turned to various other diets during this time, weight watchers (which i think is a great diet- btw- but you really need a kitchen to do well.... actually- you need a kitchen period)... And, needless to say- i feel the most unhealthiest (my own word) that i ever have. My weight (despite all the manual labor ) is up to 155 apx ( i hate to weigh myhself now).... I continually tell myself that I will get back on track once i move .... but that has been said for months now (we were supposed to be in our house months ago) and i keep justifying the way i eat w/ all the physical work i do each day.

But- im only fooling myself. I am miserable. I cant fit into any of my clothing anymore ( i got rid of all my previous fat clothes years ago b/c i have been ap 130-140 lbs for about 4-5 years prior to this). My body hurts and aches. My joints hurt.

The worse day- was when i had started the daunting task of painting our entire house. Well, i needed to remove my wedding rings, and guess what? They were stuck! It was very very painful to get them off (i used windex- it actually worked!) but not w/o alot of pain. I havent tried to put them on since, and have felt low before, but now, i feel low low....

I need to do something. I dont know what?

Then, this past weekend, my Great Grandmother (88 years old) passed away. I spent the weekend w/ my family, and mourning a great lady who had a great long life. I woke up this morning, and said- I need to do something. I want to live that long too- or longer- but be incredibly healthy at that old age. So- i made my eggs with parmesan cheese ( a old time low carb fav of mine) and turned on my comptere, b/c DH is asleep. Then, i typed www.lowcarbfriends.com, and came here - and decided i had somethings to say. I dont know what im trying to do. I have tried a few other times to go back to lowcarbing while we are still in this chaotic state of living, and always get weak and hungry and its really hard b/c we eat out for each meal (but deep inside, i know i can do it, its just that i choose not too. I can get a salad anywhere, i can go to Boston Market and get chicken and green beans ... it all just doent appeal to me in the moment. Its so much easier to say "ill have a number 7 " then to say "salad please"....I dont know if anyone has encountered anything like this. Its a crazy story- and im just feeling low low low..... hoping i guess, that someone can sympathize with me, b/c we all have lows in life. Mine has just been going on for so long.... its really turning into a downward spiral, and i want out. I know i am too knowledgeable about the low carb lifestyle ( i am a research junkie) and i certainly know by looking in the mirror the consequence of fast food lifesytle, and I guess now i am ready to make the switch, i just cant seem to part w/ the carbs to be honest. I am afraid. I know it sounds crazy- but i think a midst this turmoil and stress of my lifestyle, the carbs are the only happieness i have right now.

I know when i move - when ever it may be- DH and i will have a much better grasp on life. We have already decided and vowed we will ge healthy and use our new kitchen each day, and we plan not to go out to eat for a LONG time- which i will not complain about. But, for now, for the mean time, i want to get healthy now. I dont want to wait. I need some encouragement- i guess thats why i am writing now. Thanks if you have read this entire post- i sincerely thank you from the bottom of my heart.

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Old 10-01-2006, 07:53 AM   #109
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My weightloss story is similar to yours. I lost quite a bit of weight, from 215 to 148, for my wedding following a diet similar to your pre-wedding diet. I weighed in at 160 on the day back from our honeymoon.

My weight creeped back up into the 180s over the past couple of years. I finally reached a point where enough was enough in May of this year. I was tired of eating fast food garbage that made me feel like garbage. The weight is slowly coming off, but I am doing it much healthier this time, eating 3 meals a day w/lots of veggies, lean meats, some berries, small quantities of nuts, yogurt...

I hope that you can move into your new house very soon so you can have your own space, cook healthier foods, take better care of yourself & feel married again. I know that you can get back to a weight that makes you feel healthy & happy!

My sincerest sympathies for the loss of your great grandmother.

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Old 01-17-2008, 02:59 PM   #110
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Pauline and her story has really inspired me. I've read a few threads on here lately of people who are desperate and want to give in or quit.

I looked this thread up and am bumping it again in hopes that it will help more people like me.

You are the best Pauline! Hope it is OK that I bumped this thread.
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Old 01-17-2008, 03:33 PM   #111
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Oh gosh Alex, not angry, just a wee bit embarassed -- and I feel really bad that I was not around for the posts above. Hard to believe it's almost been two years since I wrote this and I am still going strong on Atkins and fighting the good fight against the evil binge

Nicky if you are around at all -- all I can say to you is to keep trying and the same advice I gave above to Brilliant. If you are a binge-eater, strict strict plans will likely only backfire. PM me if you want to talk. P
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Old 01-17-2008, 06:03 PM   #112
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Originally Posted by TaDa! View Post
Oh gosh Alex, not angry, just a wee bit embarassed --
Oh, Pauline... You should not be embarrassed. You should be proud of how you overcame so much and how amazingly well and articulately you can relate your amazing story. I know you read a lot of books, ever thought of writing one??
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Old 01-17-2008, 06:52 PM   #113
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Words can not express my grattitude to you for posting your story - you are a REAL life inspiration - tank you so much!
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Old 01-17-2008, 07:03 PM   #114
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Oh my gosh, Pauline you're back! Pauline you inspired many, including me, especially back when I was a vegetarian and you were so helpful.

Many of us have missed you Pauline. So what if the clothes are a little snug; you and a million others during this time of year...look how far you've come!!!

Welcome back!!!
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Old 01-17-2008, 07:22 PM   #115
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Old 01-17-2008, 07:23 PM   #116
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A-mazing!!! You look fantastic and so happy. I identify with a lot of your struggles and it's really great to see someone who's pushed past her issues and succeeded. Let's me know we can all do it. Thanks!
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Old 01-17-2008, 07:32 PM   #117
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I can not even put in to word's how your story touched me.

Prolific in only a way a true binger can relate to.

It is one day at a time but you lived to tell the story, healthy body and mind. That is true success.
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Old 01-18-2008, 06:52 AM   #118
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[COLOR=darkorchid]Your story IS an inspiration.[/COLOR]
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Old 01-19-2008, 01:08 PM   #119
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[COLOR="Sienna"]WOW. I am floored by your candor and while reading I can't help looking for the me in your story. Thank God for His helping you do what no one else could.. and even in part what you were unable to do apart from Him ![/COLOR]
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Old 01-22-2008, 12:43 AM   #120
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Wow.... I'm speechless... What a great story- Congratulations!
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