down to the wire - a plea?

[ishkala]

okay.

here it is - i have decided to get rid of this weight that i do not want.

i wanted to post here in an effort to get a penpal - a serious one - that would want to write, maybe daily (small or big emails)... because i need something to keep me going - i tend to lose motivation VERY quickly.. it's frustrating! i have written with a few people off this board before (not that they weren't cool, it's just that i slacked off and didn't write them back! so, i'm sorry for that.. haha!)

my stats or whatever, i want to be totally open in this process.. i'm 5 foot 6, i weigh 165 and wear like a size 12-14... i am sick of being this weight! i feel crappy and i hate the feeling of the extra pudge. it sucks!! i would like to weigh around 130... that's my goal i suppose... but mainly just to start feeling better!! i'm sick of people saying - oh, you don't need to lose weight or whatever.. well, they don't feel how i feel - i know what i need to do, it's just so hard to continue doing it.

i live in seattle... i'm a girl.. 24 years old..
something about me - i feel like i have tons of ideas for things (in life and also in losing weight), so i get caught up in all these ideas and often get nothing done because i just feel stuck.

i'm also very good at rationalizing myself out of things.. haha... i get a picture in my head of what i want to be, and then as the day progresses, i turn things over and over in my head and change it up and i always end up having to go back to the start...

lately i have been writing down everything that i eat and drink - besides being a handy tool for weight loss, it's extremely fascinating to see how much and what i eat.. it's been such a big help - and a HUGE eye opener!! i do recommend doing this, for sure! perhaps someone would be interested in shooting emails back and forth daily with what we've eaten? i did that last year with a friend - we would exchange food notebooks, it really keeps you accountable because you know someone will be reading exactly what you ate...



if you can identify with some of the things i've said, feel free to write!
and if i am merely writing to my computer with this post, i guess at least i got it in writing somewhere... <shrug>
of course it's okay if you don't write too.. only write me if you feel moved - this is very important!

oh - and thanks for reading.. i normally am not a big fan of writing a book posting, but here's mine, so i do thank you for reading!! (i took a LONG time in coloring it so it's not so daunting to read, haha!)