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Old 03-27-2013, 08:49 AM   #631
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Lisa- Definitely go to the doc if you are still feeling sick. Hopefully you'll get better in a day or two and be able to enjoy Florida.

Jeanie- Have you read any of the following books: Brain Over Binge by Kathryn Hansen, Food:The Good Girl's Drug by Sunny Sea Gold, Beating OVEReating by Gillian Riley. All good books with differing perspectives on binge eating. Brain Over Binge is especially good and I would recommend reading it. If you cannot afford to get a copy PM me your address and I would be happy to send you one.
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Old 03-27-2013, 02:02 PM   #632
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Went to doctor today. Change of meds. Hoping to feel better...
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Old 03-27-2013, 03:39 PM   #633
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Lisa- Definitely go to the doc if you are still feeling sick. Hopefully you'll get better in a day or two and be able to enjoy Florida.

Jeanie- Have you read any of the following books: Brain Over Binge by Kathryn Hansen, Food:The Good Girl's Drug by Sunny Sea Gold, Beating OVEReating by Gillian Riley. All good books with differing perspectives on binge eating. Brain Over Binge is especially good and I would recommend reading it. If you cannot afford to get a copy PM me your address and I would be happy to send you one.
I have read Brain over Binge, but will look into the others as well. Thanks.
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Old 03-27-2013, 04:59 PM   #634
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Reviews stated that The Good Girl's drug book was geared toward teens and the Beating overeating was $325 at Amazon-don't know what that crazy price was about. I ordered Ditching Dieting by Gillian Riley which is supposed to be basically an update of the Beating Overeating book.
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Old 03-28-2013, 05:11 AM   #635
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Good luck to you Jeanie. I know how hard you have been trying to get this monster under control. Do not give up! Something will click eventually as long as you keep fighting. I admire your tenacity.
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Old 03-28-2013, 04:06 PM   #636
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Jeanie have you considered trying to find a local suport group for eating disorders in your area? I would think there would be some with affiliation to local hospitals or mental health centers. I feel for you and understand the helpless, hopeless and out of control feeling you are having.
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Old 03-28-2013, 04:47 PM   #637
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I tried on OA meeting and it didn't click with me at all. There is a Food Addicts group at the local hospital on Saturdays but I am scared to go.
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Old 03-28-2013, 10:45 PM   #638
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Hi everybody.

Welcome back Frankie, glad to see you posting again!

Lisa, I hope you feel better and have a happy time in Florida.

Jeanie, I feel your pain. Once again I have blown it. Sometimes it feels like am never gonna win this battle. I have a hard time posting here when I have blown it. I am reading a book now that looks at binge eating from a religious/spiritual perspective. I will let you know if it's of value. So once again I am getting back on the wagon. Sigh

Cici, it has been quiet here, but I hope we don't let this thread die on the vine. I really want to keep coming here. You know, maybe we should start counting days again. What do you all think?

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Old 03-29-2013, 05:31 AM   #639
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Day one here. More when I get to computer.
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Old 03-29-2013, 05:43 AM   #640
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Hi friends.

Brandi I think you're right. Let's not let this thread die. It is too valuable.

Jeanie. I tried an OA meeting a few years back. Wasn't for me either. Try the one at the hospital. Do not let fear stand in your way. What is the worst thing that could happen?

Cici. Hi! Hope all is well.

Frankie-
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Old 03-29-2013, 08:24 AM   #641
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Jeanie- Call the leader/organizer of the support group and explain your fears of going to the group. You can bet that every person in the group felt the same way before their first meeting. Is the fear to go check it out greater than the self hate and anguish you have after binging? I would guess that it would not measure up to a fraction of the negative feelings you have after a binge. You have been dealing with those feelings for so long it might be a huge relief to unburden yourself along with others and try and find a solution that will really help you.
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Old 03-29-2013, 08:56 AM   #642
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You no longer binge right? What worked for you? I am scared of the unknown, but what makes me take pause is that I fear trying to follow their food plan will cause me to lose the little bit of control I do have by eating low carb.
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Old 03-30-2013, 11:02 AM   #643
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Jeanie, I don't follow anyone else's plan. I follow my own plan based on what I feel will work for me. If this was not working for me then I might have considered following a more structured plan. But this is working right now. I am not sure what clicked. I think part of it was getting a "stop" mechanism for when the urge to eat bubbles up after a stressful or emotionally charged time. I actually make myself stop and think about the reason I want to eat and why my thoughts keep circling back to eating. It is always something I have not dealt with straight on. So I make myself stop everything and think about it. This is sooooo hard to do. In a way it is easier to not think about it and go eat some chips and french fries. So I think physically stopping and sitting and thinking about what has been going on in my life is the first thing. I may have to do this several times. I know it is not working if I keep thinking about food, bad junky, carby food. If I focus on my feelings and let myself feel them the urge to eat does subside.

The the second thing is that instead of obsessing on and thinking about the next thing I will eat while I am already eating, I have been looking at food kind of cut and dry. I log, measure, calculate, weigh and plan my foods ahead of time. I am learning to know how much food I can actually live with and not go beyond that. I plan and portion everything. I cannot just eat "some" nuts or I'd eat half the bag without thinking about it. I can still mindlessly eat. So now I am mindful about all food. I plan in the morning or even the day before what I will have and then I don't really have to think about it again. I have gotten to the point now where I can be a tiny bit more lenient. If I find I want to substitute something in my daily meal plan I get on my food journal and see the repercussions of changing or adding a particular food. Will I need to adjust something else or completely delete something to be able to add that item into my daily intake. But if I feel myself pulling to the side of eating off plan, I regroup and get strict again.

I also do not cook high carb foods that I love and have them in the house. As a result if my BF wants something he has to make it himself. I just don't do it anymore. If I cook high carb, it has to be for a party or some event where I take it out of the house. If I plan to eat some of it at an event I log what size portion I will have ahead of time and stick to it. But it has got to be outta the house. I learned this with some cookies I made and ate more than I wanted or planned. I was not super stressed or emotional but those cookies wormed their way into my head. My mind will think about that food constantly, obsessively until I go and get some and then the obsessive thoughts start again until I go get more. So it is better to just not even tempt myself.

I do eat some higher carb portions on the weekends. But I only eat them when we go out so the portions are limited and they fit into my food plan. I adjust my carbs and calories so I know what I can have and how much of it based on my day's totals. This is something I look forward to and feel like I am eating normally. Not over doing it or pigging out. These portions are not excessive and are part of my weekly plan. I am looking at moderation. If I felt at all out of control with this I would stop it immediately.

These things have helped me stop binging. I don't know if they would work for you or not. I may have to change what I do as time goes on but my obsessive thoughts about food and urge to binge during stress has really gone down. It is all still there but the frequency has lessened and the automatic impulse to reach for food is getting much better. But I think I may always have to have some sort of control or measure in place.
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Old 03-31-2013, 07:04 AM   #644
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Happy Easter to all my friends here. Just back from church. Will be enjoying the celebratory feasting soon. Hope you all have a blessed day.
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Old 04-02-2013, 09:09 PM   #645
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Hi Everybody,

Hope you all had a happy Easter/Passover. I had friends over for Easter dinner and one of the women is my recovering anorexic/bulimic friend, (the one who wouldn't eat at Thanksgiving you may recall). Well she continues (inspite of still being unbelieveably skinny) to eat well, stick to her plan and not purge. We all had a nice time, and after all the others had left, she sat me down and tried to convince me that I should see her therapist. She credits this woman with "curing" her disorder and believes she could help me too. (This came after my husband a couple of days earlier suggested we get me a nutritionist. I guess he HAS been paying attention to my diet/fail, diet/fail, diet/fail eating after all). There is a part of me that thinks "ok, I keep dieting myself fatter, I keep overeating everyday even though I plan not to. I think I will call this doctor". But the other part of me thinks "Wait: I am not as bad as this girl, I am not as bad as these people who go to this doctor, I am not morbidly obese or skeletal. Or for that matter throwing up or even really bingeing. I don't need to go". So I would like to hear what you all think. (I can guess, but I still need to hear it). Would you go if you were me?

Brandi
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Old 04-02-2013, 09:34 PM   #646
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Jeaniem - I know you have probably heard this before but have you sat down with a pen and paper when the binge monster comes? I know myself that I read this along with having a bath, ring a friend, go for a walk...blah..blah..and I never tried these things because I feel they are useless when the BM comes - it's like trying to stop a tsunami with a bandaid (that's binge monster by the way, not a bowel movement)

But I have been reading of someone who actually sat down and wrote in a log the time, date, what she felt before, the scale of the urgency etc etc; and she found by the time she analysed it, the BM had left. I know it's a simple remedy and I have tended to not even consider it but it did work for this person and she was able to find a pattern to the binges.

I used to suffer from severe panic attacks that came out of the blue. In some ways they remind me of the BM because it's like something that takes over you; you are powerless to them, because it is a very primitive lizard/caveman response - flight or fight. One of the steps I had to do, and helped me was to start concentrating in my head say, countries of the world starting with A and going through the alphabet. This brings the conscious brain into action and silences the primitive brain and it works. Maybe sitting down and writing and bringing the conscious brain back into power (and we know it takes a back seat with the BM comes) and analysing the binge before it hits might stifle it. I don't know, sorry just a suggestion. I've read your posts for a while now and I feel terribly sad and wish I could help you.
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Old 04-03-2013, 02:43 AM   #647
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Hi Everybody,

Hope you all had a happy Easter/Passover. I had friends over for Easter dinner and one of the women is my recovering anorexic/bulimic friend, (the one who wouldn't eat at Thanksgiving you may recall). Well she continues (inspite of still being unbelieveably skinny) to eat well, stick to her plan and not purge. We all had a nice time, and after all the others had left, she sat me down and tried to convince me that I should see her therapist. She credits this woman with "curing" her disorder and believes she could help me too. (This came after my husband a couple of days earlier suggested we get me a nutritionist. I guess he HAS been paying attention to my diet/fail, diet/fail, diet/fail eating after all). There is a part of me that thinks "ok, I keep dieting myself fatter, I keep overeating everyday even though I plan not to. I think I will call this doctor". But the other part of me thinks "Wait: I am not as bad as this girl, I am not as bad as these people who go to this doctor, I am not morbidly obese or skeletal. Or for that matter throwing up or even really bingeing. I don't need to go". So I would like to hear what you all think. (I can guess, but I still need to hear it). Would you go if you were me?

Brandi

Hi Brandi-
Unless insurance/money is at issue, you have absolutely nothing to lose and everything to gain by going to see this therapist. Having said that, if you are not open to the treatment it will not be helpful. I knew a girl who was bulimic and went to various therapists- she never stuck it out! She always felt like they were trying to make her fat and she would compare other girls in the office to herself. She was "always the fattest" girl and was embarrassed by her size! Now, I can tell you she was in no way fat but she wasn't skinny like those suffering from anorexia so in her mind she was huge!
I like the post above by mojo- if therapy doesn't seem like a viable option, maybe try this technique. It makes sense to my science-bent brain
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Old 04-03-2013, 02:49 AM   #648
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I used to suffer from severe panic attacks that came out of the blue. In some ways they remind me of the BM because it's like something that takes over you; you are powerless to them, because it is a very primitive lizard/caveman response - flight or fight. One of the steps I had to do, and helped me was to start concentrating in my head say, countries of the world starting with A and going through the alphabet. This brings the conscious brain into action and silences the primitive brain and it works. Maybe sitting down and writing and bringing the conscious brain back into power (and we know it takes a back seat with the BM comes) and analysing the binge before it hits might stifle it. I don't know, sorry just a suggestion. I've read your posts for a while now and I feel terribly sad and wish I could help you.
Hi Mojo-
This seems like a brilliant idea! It makes so much sense to try to engage the conscious brain I wholeheartedly agree that the feeling that accompany the BM () are very similar to that of panic. Ugh! Just thinking about that frenzy makes me so uncomfortable.
This was an excellent post! Thank you for the insight
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Old 04-03-2013, 02:49 AM   #649
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hi! new here - starting day 3 of being binge free! i can usually do 1-2 days easy and day 3 is like ok, here we GO, so i'm planning to tackle this day head on. i saw someone mention brain over binge - i love this book and pull it out and read it a lot, and then read it again lol...it makes sense to me but i have to keep it fresh in my mind so thats why i will pull the book out usually every few months. hope everyone has a great day! i will def start checking in here to help me stay accountable - i hope to have that 80 day binge free note on my signature!
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Old 04-03-2013, 07:40 AM   #650
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Jeaniem - I know you have probably heard this before but have you sat down with a pen and paper when the binge monster comes? I know myself that I read this along with having a bath, ring a friend, go for a walk...blah..blah..and I never tried these things because I feel they are useless when the BM comes - it's like trying to stop a tsunami with a bandaid (that's binge monster by the way, not a bowel movement)

But I have been reading of someone who actually sat down and wrote in a log the time, date, what she felt before, the scale of the urgency etc etc; and she found by the time she analysed it, the BM had left. I know it's a simple remedy and I have tended to not even consider it but it did work for this person and she was able to find a pattern to the binges.

I used to suffer from severe panic attacks that came out of the blue. In some ways they remind me of the BM because it's like something that takes over you; you are powerless to them, because it is a very primitive lizard/caveman response - flight or fight. One of the steps I had to do, and helped me was to start concentrating in my head say, countries of the world starting with A and going through the alphabet. This brings the conscious brain into action and silences the primitive brain and it works. Maybe sitting down and writing and bringing the conscious brain back into power (and we know it takes a back seat with the BM comes) and analysing the binge before it hits might stifle it. I don't know, sorry just a suggestion. I've read your posts for a while now and I feel terribly sad and wish I could help you.

I have written note cards that I read when the bm hits. It usually only delays the binge, but lately I have had some success with going through the alphabet and naming foods/exercises that are good for me. That has helped for some reason. Also now that the weather is nice I put on my headphones and get out for a walk. These things don't always work, but I have read that exery time we binge we reinforce the pathways to binge. So while not always successful every bit helps.
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Old 04-03-2013, 07:46 AM   #651
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Hi Everybody,

Hope you all had a happy Easter/Passover. I had friends over for Easter dinner and one of the women is my recovering anorexic/bulimic friend, (the one who wouldn't eat at Thanksgiving you may recall). Well she continues (inspite of still being unbelieveably skinny) to eat well, stick to her plan and not purge. We all had a nice time, and after all the others had left, she sat me down and tried to convince me that I should see her therapist. She credits this woman with "curing" her disorder and believes she could help me too. (This came after my husband a couple of days earlier suggested we get me a nutritionist. I guess he HAS been paying attention to my diet/fail, diet/fail, diet/fail eating after all). There is a part of me that thinks "ok, I keep dieting myself fatter, I keep overeating everyday even though I plan not to. I think I will call this doctor". But the other part of me thinks "Wait: I am not as bad as this girl, I am not as bad as these people who go to this doctor, I am not morbidly obese or skeletal. Or for that matter throwing up or even really bingeing. I don't need to go". So I would like to hear what you all think. (I can guess, but I still need to hear it). Would you go if you were me?

Brandi
I understand your reservations as well. I have looked into therapists in my area but never take the plunge. My reason is I know deep down that trying to lose weight/diet is what my started my binging and most likely the only way to truly cure it is to stop dieting. I know some will say low carb is not a "diet", but it does not work that way in my mind.

Do you have any insight as to why you binge? Are you sure you binge or are you perhaps overeating?
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Old 04-03-2013, 07:33 PM   #652
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I understand your reservations as well. I have looked into therapists in my area but never take the plunge. My reason is I know deep down that trying to lose weight/diet is what my started my binging and most likely the only way to truly cure it is to stop dieting. I know some will say low carb is not a "diet", but it does not work that way in my mind.

Do you have any insight as to why you binge? Are you sure you binge or are you perhaps overeating?
Hi Jeanie,
Right now my issue is more overeating than bingeing. I think that is the root of my reservation. I have convinced myself that because right at this minute I am not bingeing I am not bad enough to go see this doctor. But my friend asked me if I was happy, and I said no. She asked if I obsess about food and I said yes. We talked about my avoiding people because of not being at my ideal weight. We talked about my relating food and eating to being "good" or "bad". She said "you do realize this is not normal". Of course I realize that. When I look back at some of my past behaviors, like hiding chocolate in my sock drawer, or crash dieting to the tune of 700 calories a day, I know I need help. I just get wary because so many things haven't helped. I don't mean things like WW or JC or LFL or any other diet, I mean therapy or OA meetings. When therapy didn't work, I was really upset and I started to think that the reason it didn't work was because maybe I really didn't need therapy. But now that I think back, she didnt seem to really address the eating issues. That is not her specialty, and she has never had an eating disorder herself, so maybe that's why it didn't work. This new doctor is both.

Lisa, there is an insurance issue, and this doctor is in another city. That isn't the root of my hesitation though. My lack of faith is.

My friend asked me to just go one time. She said if after one time I don't think she can help me then ok, I don't have to return. The thing is that my husband also asked me to please go just once. And recently a nurse cornered me and said she could tell I have an eating disorder. And a friend said his wife told him I had an eating disorder the day she met me. And my DH wanted to know what you all said about whether I should go. And he offered to go with me. And so on and so on and so on. I guess a house does have to fall on me, all these people cannot be wrong. The bottom line is that I am not happy, I struggle everyday, and I would never have come here to this thread, and bared my soul if I didn't want to end this misery. So I have my answer. I am gonna go now and call the doctor.

Brandi
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Old 04-03-2013, 08:46 PM   #653
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I understand your reservations as well. I have looked into therapists in my area but never take the plunge. My reason is I know deep down that trying to lose weight/diet is what my started my binging and most likely the only way to truly cure it is to stop dieting. I know some will say low carb is not a "diet", but it does not work that way in my mind.

Do you have any insight as to why you binge? Are you sure you binge or are you perhaps overeating?
Dieting is what starts it all. I was a normal eater until I did the crazy Beverely Hills diet years and years ago; nothing but kiwi fruit and pineapple for a month. It was the beginning of the end.

I also believe it's a leptin issue. Overeating/binging/eating when not hungry screws up leptin signals. Maybe Mastering Leptin? Three meals a day, protein for breakfast, no snacking and nothing after dinner. I'm glad to hear you are having a little bit of success though
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Old 04-04-2013, 02:54 AM   #654
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Brandi- a lot of therapists work on a sliding scale so perhaps he/she will work with u regarding finances. Isn't it crazy that we cannot afford to keep ourselves well? I'm not political in the least but when people cannot afford appropriate health care that just makes me crazy!
I'm not sure one visit will tell the tale but it is certainly worth a shot! Keep us updated!
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Old 04-04-2013, 02:55 AM   #655
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Originally Posted by robbelkk View Post
hi! new here - starting day 3 of being binge free! i can usually do 1-2 days easy and day 3 is like ok, here we GO, so i'm planning to tackle this day head on. i saw someone mention brain over binge - i love this book and pull it out and read it a lot, and then read it again lol...it makes sense to me but i have to keep it fresh in my mind so thats why i will pull the book out usually every few months. hope everyone has a great day! i will def start checking in here to help me stay accountable - i hope to have that 80 day binge free note on my signature!
Hello and welcome. This is a wonderfully supportive thread.
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Old 04-04-2013, 03:38 PM   #656
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Brandi, you might ask this doc if she has a special rate for those with insurance issues. I would also ask your local hospital if they have a free support group. If you can go with a friend or your husband please take advantage of the support you have, you are very fortunate to have loving, supportive people on your side. You may not feel that you have much of a problem but obviously people in your life are concerned enough about you to prompt you to get help. What is the worst that can come of it? You waste some time and don't go again if it really is something you did not like. But I would take that chance and just go to see if there was the chance that this therapist could open my thoughts and belief systems to allow me to change my behaviors.

Please make an appointment!
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Old 04-04-2013, 03:47 PM   #657
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Jeanie, I think that you need to get some help since this is distressing you. A good therapist specializing with food and eating disorders will understand the the causality and results of "dieting" on your behaviors related to food. I think a standard therapist might not have the expertise you need.

There are several organizations you can look to for therapists:
Welcome_to_the_International Association of Eating Disorders_Professionals_Foundation! The International Association of Eating Disorder Professionals

Association of Professionals Treating Eating Disorders The Association of Professionals Treating Eating Disorders

AED | Find a Professional Academy for Eating Disorders
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Old 04-04-2013, 06:48 PM   #658
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Hi Frankie,

I did make the appointment. It's Monday the 15th at 2 (PST- everybody send good thoughts!). She does not take insurance, and she costs $200.00 an hour. Honestly I cannot afford it, but DH and I decided I should go at least once and if I feel she is right for me, maybe she would see me monthly or something. I am currently the sole provider here and spending this amount makes me anxious, but after speaking to the doctor, she said that my binge eating behaviors were "textbook". So I guess I need to get out of denial. She was very nice and said she specializes in binge eating and bulimia pretty much exclusively, so she will definitely have the experience to help me. I am actually kind of excited to meet her. Maybe this will be it.

Brandi
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Old 04-05-2013, 02:44 AM   #659
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Great news Brandi!! $200 is significant but if you can get some help it will be worth it! Once a month sou DS like a good plan if the therapist is unable to work out a fee scheduled that is less daunting.

Good luck!
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Old 04-05-2013, 08:39 AM   #660
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Hi all! Just checking in to help me stay on track. Today is the start of day 5 for being binge free. I'm feeling good and doing NK. Had ketones showing in urine today. This WOE really helps appetite go down and the urge to binge is gone which is strange. I feel lighter and less stressed about food/eating. I'm nervous the feelings will creep back in but trying to just focus on what I need to be doing to keep moving forward. Hoping everyone has a great weekend!
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