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Old 03-12-2013, 03:24 PM   #601
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Well, I figured out today that my depression is situational- now I just have to figure out how to ignore the negativity that I have allowed to impact me

I cannot change how people perceive me but I always feel so badly when they see me in a negative light. I shouldn't care but I do!
Now I need to figure out how to not give a flying fig. Once I figure that out, the urge to binge will go away. Easy, right?
No fun. Think we all experience this. I am not so good at not caring but sometimes ask myself some questions.

Is someone's perception of me based on misinformation?
Is there something that I would like to correct, whether their information or my actions?
If there is nothing to change on my part, can I release their perception as something that has nothing to do with my future activity or feelings.

Congrats on staying strong even though you may not feel that way. Strength is doing the hard thing.
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Old 03-12-2013, 04:11 PM   #602
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I like your questions Cici! The releasing is the part the troubles me. I will perseverate on this for days but I am feeling better now that I have identified the cause of my angst!
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Old 03-12-2013, 04:23 PM   #603
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I like your questions Cici! The releasing is the part the troubles me. I will perseverate on this for days but I am feeling better now that I have identified the cause of my angst!
Now, there is a word you don't see often. I had to look it up.
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Old 03-12-2013, 05:11 PM   #604
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Good for you Lisa! I know I am guilty of caring too much about what others think. I will perseverate and go over what was said/done in my mind until it drives me crazy.
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Old 03-12-2013, 07:14 PM   #605
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I always enjoy a good perseverate.
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Old 03-12-2013, 11:49 PM   #606
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Originally Posted by Biochic View Post
Well, I figured out today that my depression is situational- now I just have to figure out how to ignore the negativity that I have allowed to impact me

I cannot change how people perceive me but I always feel so badly when they see me in a negative light. I shouldn't care but I do!
Now I need to figure out how to not give a flying fig. Once I figure that out, the urge to binge will go away. Easy, right?
Lisa,
I once met a lady who had given up binge drinking and she said something interesting. She said "you hurt me, so I'll drink the poison, I'll show you!". She told me that once she recognized how insane her behavior was, she was able to make a change. Like you, I find I am sensitive (overly, I'm sure) to people's criticism (You called me fat, so I'll eat the doughnut, I'll show you!). Maybe what we need to do is to remind ourselves that the negative, hurtful people win when we allow ourselves to be upset by them. But they also win, when because of them, we abuse ourselves with food. Doesn't that sound crazy? Like when a condescending, conceited, arrogant relative of mine insults me, then I go eat a bunch of cheesecake. Not only does he feel above me, but then I go and prove him right! Lets not prove these people right anymore. I know easier said than done, but its worth a try.
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Old 03-13-2013, 02:58 AM   #607
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Hahaha you guys are too funny. Perseverate!


Brandi- yes it does sound insane yet that is exactly where I go when wounded. I guess I never learned the appropriate coping skills

If I'm not in the drivers seat I'll never get where I want to go! I need to do what is right for me and not concern myself with how others feel about my decisions. As long as I am living my life by the rules, there should be no issue!
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Old 03-14-2013, 04:05 PM   #608
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Mighty quiet over here. Everyone okay?
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Old 03-14-2013, 04:31 PM   #609
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Doing okay here just taking it one day at a time. Hope everyone is well!
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Old 03-14-2013, 05:52 PM   #610
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Crappy week but no binge so all good. Yoga the next 3 days. I also joined the Oprah 21 day meditation challenge. I need to center
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Old 03-14-2013, 10:31 PM   #611
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Crazy busy week, no bingeing, but food choices not the best. Yesterday got blood work back saying yes, premature menopause. Made me kind of emotional. I never wanted kids, but now I feel the decision is being made for me. It's a weird feeling, like losing control of something. Quite upsetting actually. Not the no kids part but the no choice part.

This week I have clients back to back 10 hours/day, no breaks. Anniversary tomorrow, no time to spend with DH. Even working on my day off. I started re-reading Atkins so after my anniversary piece of cake I can go on induction and get back on track. I am so tired! Oh, then on top of it all, not 12 hours after Dr. gives me the results, TOM starts. First in 5 months. WHAT????
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Old 03-15-2013, 05:14 PM   #612
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Crazy busy week, no bingeing, but food choices not the best. Yesterday got blood work back saying yes, premature menopause. Made me kind of emotional. I never wanted kids, but now I feel the decision is being made for me. It's a weird feeling, like losing control of something. Quite upsetting actually. Not the no kids part but the no choice part.

This week I have clients back to back 10 hours/day, no breaks. Anniversary tomorrow, no time to spend with DH. Even working on my day off. I started re-reading Atkins so after my anniversary piece of cake I can go on induction and get back on track. I am so tired! Oh, then on top of it all, not 12 hours after Dr. gives me the results, TOM starts. First in 5 months. WHAT????
Understandable that this would be upsetting news, regardless of your intentions. Don't get too comfortable though. I was supposed to be unable to bear children due to an internal birth defect and surprise, surprise have a wonderful daughter who managed to find a way. She had to be C-section delivered but otherwise pregnancy was normal.

May I butt in and say that though it is wonderful that your new business is rocking, now that you have complete control of your schedule, continuing at that pace will surely have adverse effects.

Glad to hear from some of you that you are doing okay. Me too.
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Old 03-16-2013, 04:11 AM   #613
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Hi Brandi-
I agree with Cici. Continue to be careful if you are trying to avoid pregnancy. The universe sent you a sign .
Having said that, I completely understand how upsetting the news must have been. Not having control over our bodies is not only frustrating but frightening as well.
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Old 03-17-2013, 01:59 PM   #614
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Have been kind of grazing today. Am okay with calories but a little unsettled with the activity and concerned about this evening . I know it is because tomorrow I have a difficult appointment. Guess it is time to reach for the GABA.
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Old 03-17-2013, 06:43 PM   #615
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Hope it all goes well cici
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Old 03-18-2013, 02:45 AM   #616
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Good luck today Cici.
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Old 03-19-2013, 10:25 AM   #617
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Thanks. I'm okay. Glad it is in the past.
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Old 03-19-2013, 10:31 PM   #618
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Cici, glad to hear you're ok.

How's everybody else doing?

Things here calmed down a bit. I restarted induction yesterday. I haven't been bingeing, but also haven't been making the best choices. Easy to slack when life gets overwhelming (excuse). Time to get serious and finally get this extra weight off. I am doing better as far as dealing with the premature menopause. It is what it is. Thanks ladies for the support!
Brandi
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Old 03-20-2013, 04:36 PM   #619
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Glad things have settled down for you Brandi
Cici sounds like you're doing ok too.

Hanging in there myself. Getting ready to head back down to Florida. So tired of the snow leaving Sunday returning Saturday

Finally broke the 168 mark. Down 2 more lbs.
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Old 03-20-2013, 05:26 PM   #620
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Yay, Lisa! I stopped by your journal and really loved reading about your journey. You are doing great! Enjoy your trip.
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Old 03-21-2013, 02:37 AM   #621
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Thank you Cici!
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Old 03-21-2013, 10:33 AM   #622
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Cici, glad to hear you're ok.

How's everybody else doing?

Things here calmed down a bit. I restarted induction yesterday. I haven't been bingeing, but also haven't been making the best choices. Easy to slack when life gets overwhelming (excuse). Time to get serious and finally get this extra weight off. I am doing better as far as dealing with the premature menopause. It is what it is. Thanks ladies for the support!
Brandi
Glad you checked in Brandi
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Old 03-22-2013, 02:10 PM   #623
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Hello all. I have been super busy with travel and then a bunch of work after coming home. I have been doing pretty good with food and figuring out some emotionally stressful situations that typically would send me to binge. I think each time this happens and I don't binge I feel stronger and am learning that my first impulse to eat my not go away, but I can recognize it and turn it around. This is a big realization that that impulse might NEVER go away and that I will always need to be mindful of it. But this is easier to deal with than being morbidly obese and all the baggage, health issues and emotional pain that comes with it.

Lisa- Congrats on the loss!

Brandi- I am glad you are posting and not binging. I second being careful during peri menopause. One year after not having TOM, which is supposed to be when you are in full menopause, the next month I had a TOM outta the blue. That was scary as I was off birth control. Now it's been another year and half so I think I am safe, but with weight loss and crazy hormones ya just never know.
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Nothing right now can possibly taste as good as thin will feel!!!
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Old 03-22-2013, 03:38 PM   #624
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Hi Frankie-
I think you may be on to something! Each time we respond to stress without binging, we are essentially retraining ourselves... Rewriting the circuits. Maybe that's the key works for me- so far
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Old 03-24-2013, 05:16 PM   #625
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Ate crackers today...

Hi everyone. I have been sick since Wednesday but I was scheduled to fly to Florida today and rather than lose $$ I went. Worse decision I have made in a long time. I was so sick on the plane that I actually had to use an air sick bag! I was connecting in Cleveland and continued to be ill in the ladies room but after getting rid of my breakfast, I started to feel better. I knew I needed something to help with the upset stomach. I bought ritz crackers. They were the closest thing to saltines I could find I have eaten 9 crackers today and nothing else. I cannot take my medicine without vomiting. These damn crackers are the only things that stay down.
I made I to Florida and drove to my home, got into pj's and went to bed at 4 pm
Still feeling horrible. Chest cold, head cold and now vomiting. Ugh...
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Old 03-24-2013, 09:09 PM   #626
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Lisa, I hope you feel better soon. Don't worry about eating those crackers. You eat them until you can have real food again. If you keep vomiting you need to see a doc so he can give you something to keep things down. You do not want to be sick and dehydrated.
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Old 03-25-2013, 04:43 AM   #627
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Aw, Lisa. Rough way to start your Florida stay. Get well soon.

Hi, Franki. Nice to see you again.

It has been so quiet around here that I just thought the thread was dying of old age. Does anyone want to continue here or start a new thread or just go on to other places?
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Old 03-25-2013, 05:16 AM   #628
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Feeling a bit better today. Having coffee. No chance those crackers will set off a binge ( although is was worried about that). Will head to the supermarket in a few minutes. Wish me luck!
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Old 03-25-2013, 07:00 PM   #629
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Aw, Lisa. Rough way to start your Florida stay. Get well soon.

Hi, Franki. Nice to see you again.

It has been so quiet around here that I just thought the thread was dying of old age. Does anyone want to continue here or start a new thread or just go on to other places?
It is quiet. I feel like I am making no progress towards stopping the binge eating. I can easily trace my patterns and see that I repeat the same behaviors over and over again, so I figure rather than post my failures I will continue to read and hope that something will click with me.
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Old 03-26-2013, 05:06 AM   #630
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Still so sick went to the supermarket but just cannot eat anything. May have to go to walk in clinic. Thankfully my flight home is not until Saturday. I will not get back on the plane if I am still sick
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