Old Timers and Newbies!

[Lost and Found]

Originally Posted by *Pear*

Yuck, sorry about that nasty commute. Reading about how cold it is, made me cold. Brrrrr. How can you stand it?

It's a dry cold!!!!!

[*Pear*]

Originally Posted by Lost and Found

:kick ing:



I'm so glad that you didn't give up, Pear!!!!!!! Congrats, honey!!!!

Remember when I told you that I wouldn't give up on you? I made you put your "Onederland By Valentine's Day" slogan back up. Look.....now...9 more pounds, and you'll be there. I know that you can do it!!!! You're even exercising now....I bet that you see Onederland before Valentine's day!!!!!


I'm sooooooo excited for you!!!!!

Thanks sweetie!

I'll bet you make onederland before Valentines Day!!!

[Lost and Found]

Originally Posted by *Pear*

Where's our Click this morning?

Hi...Pear!!!

I ran some errands this morning.

Have you, or anyone else here, heard of some kind of peanut butter....hang on...I'll be right back....have to get the jar....







Okay...I'm back!!! It was still in the car.


Anyways....

It's called: Smart Balance Omega Natural Peanut Butter (Couldn't find Crazy Richards...Tooter)

It contains omega 3's from flax oil.
Gluten free.
Lactose free.
vegan.

Omega 6: 1000 mg
Omega 3: 1000 mg

200 calories
150 fat calories

Total carbs: 5
Fiber: 2

Ingredients:
Peanuts, natural oil blend (Flax seed & palm fruit oils), salt, molasses-- (mole asses)

"No refined sugar added--All peanuts contain a small amount of natural sugars, mostly making up the 1 g of natural sugar in this product. We add a very small amount of molasses to enhance flavor and color. Sugar content is similar to other natural brands."


Anyways.....just wondering if anyone knows about this peanut butter, as I've been hungry for some lately. Maybe, some of Tooter's cream cheese/peanutbutter mix. Or a stalk of celery with peanut butter.

[*Pear*]

Sounds like a winner to me... 3 net carbs for how much peanut butter?

[Lost and Found]

Originally Posted by *Pear*

Sounds like a winner to me... 3 net carbs for how much peanut butter?

2 Tablespoons!!!!


I just had some Kippers on pork rinds for a snack. I don't know why, but I sometimes get a craving for kippers.


Today:

2 eggs
2 slices bacon

kippers
porkrinds

[Ailuros]

Originally Posted by Lost and Found

Food Porn Queen!!!!!

When my husband came in and asked me what the book was, he said, "Oh, more food porn."

[Tooter]

Originally Posted by Ailuros

When my husband came in and asked me what the book was, he said, "Oh, more food porn."

[Lost and Found]

Originally Posted by Ailuros

When my husband came in and asked me what the book was, he said, "Oh, more food porn."

Did you ask him if he'd like a sample?

[*Pear*]

What are Kippers?

[Lost and Found]

Originally Posted by *Pear*

What are Kippers?

Canned fish. You can find them by the sardines. I like them better than sardines...not as strong.

O carbs, and pretty good for ya'.....I think?

Anyways....they are good on pork rinds for a "0" carb snack, as it feels like you are having "Happy Hour".




Ohhhhhh.....I just thought of something!!!!! Cleo's rolls!!!!! A couple of them, warmed-up with some butter and peanut butter. *drool*

I wish that someone here would try making them....I can't make them until I'm on my own again. I'm so excited to here how our group enjoys them.

By the way...cleo was eating them every day on induction, and lost 26 pounds in 2 weeks. I'm very envious...and she even had bread!!!! I think that they might be good with some garlic and finely shredded cheese in them too....for a dinner roll with our meat, veggies, and salads.

[*Pear*]

26lbs in 2 weeks? I havent lost that much in two months...

Now how is that possible to lose so much so quickly?

[Lost and Found]

Originally Posted by *Pear*

26lbs in 2 weeks? I havent lost that much in two months...

Now how is that possible to lose so much so quickly?

I know that it is not typical....but.....that's good for her!!! My mom lost 10 pounds in 1 week...that's more than half of what I've lost this entire time. I guess that everyone is different, but one thing that I do know is...this works for EVERYONE!!!!








I just noticed your change in you Valentine's slogan!!!!

You know the sad thing.....I don't know what I weigh...due to my Dad , but I do know the amount that I have lost...as I always set their scale back to zero. Who knows...I could already be in Onederland.

[*Pear*]

I was wondering how long it would take you to notice :laugh

You probably are already there, you lucky girl!!!

[Lost and Found]

Well, I have to leave and get my son from school in 15 minutes. So, I'll be back later!!!

[*Pear*]

I noticed Ixtapacheryl posting in the fascination thread.

Cheryl, Tooter, will you give us an update on the latest with Kimkins? I've been trying to stay out of there, I dont want to get sucked in again...

[*Pear*]

Click, I hope this comes in soon enough to help you out http://www.breitbart.com/article.php...show_article=1

[hippiegirl]

Hi all! I'm on day four of re-inducting. Doing good so far. No movement on the scale, but maybe looser pants!

And the Pirate is officially on the road as of about an hour ago!

Click - how did everything go last night? I've thought about you a lot!

Happy Anniversary Tooter and Mr Tooter!

Congrats on the loss, Pear!

[*Pear*]

I have two of these... I still can't figure em out.

Instructions for all those with teenage daughters or daughters who think they are teenagers or who will eventually be teenagers.

Congratulations! You are now the proud new owner of a teenaged daughter. Please read this manual carefully, as it describes the maintenance of your new daughter, and answers important questions about your warranty (which does NOT include the right to return the product to the factory for a full refund).

IF YOU FEEL YOU HAVE RECEIVED YOUR TEENAGER IN ERROR: To determine whether you were supposed to receive a teenaged girl, please examine your new daughter carefully. Does she: (a) look very similar to your original daughter, only with more makeup and less clothing? (b) refuse to acknowledge your existence on the planet Earth (except when requesting money)? (c) Sleep in a burrow of dirty laundry? If any of these are true, you have received the correct item.

BREAK-IN PERIOD When you first receive your teenaged daughter, you will initially experience a high level of discomfort. Gradually, this discomfort will subside, and you will merely feel traumatized. This is the "Break-In Period," during which you are becoming accustomed to certain behaviors that will cause you concern, anxiety, and stress. Once you have adapted to these behaviors, your teenager will start acting even worse.

ACTIVATION To activate your teenaged daughter, simply place her in the vicinity of a telephone or Instant Messenger. No further programming is required.

SHUTDOWN Several hours after activation, you may desire to shut down your teenaged daughter. There is no way to do this.

CLEANING YOUR TEENAGED DAUGHTER Having a teenaged daughter means learning the difference between the words "clean" and "neat." Teenaged daughters are very clean, because they take frequent showers that last more than an hour. They will scrub themselves with expensive, fragrant soaps which you must purchase for them because like I'm sure I'm going to use like the same kind of soap my mom and dad use. When they have completely drained the hot-water tank, they will step out and wrap themselves in every towel in the bathroom, which they will subsequently strew throughout the house. If you ask them to pick up the towels, you are confusing "clean" with "neat." Teenagers are very busy and do not have time to be neat. They expect others to pick up after them. These others are called "parents."

FEEDING YOUR TEENAGED DAUGHTER Your teenaged daughter requires regular meals, which must be purchased for her at restaurants because she detests everything you eat because it is like so disgusting. She does not want you to accompany her to these restaurants, because some people might see you and, "like I'm sure I want my friends to see me eating dinner with my parents." Either order take-out food or just give her the money, preferably both. If you order pizza, never answer the doorbell because the delivery boy might see you and, "OMG he is so hot!" Yes, your daughter's idea of an attractive man is the pizza boy.

CLOTHING YOUR TEENAGED DAUGHTER Retailers make millions of dollars a year selling stylish and frankly sensible clothing which will look adorable on your daughter. If you enjoy shopping, you will love the vast selections which are available to you. Unfortunately, your teenaged daughter wants to dress like a lap dancer. You may be able to coerce her into putting on a cute outfit before leaving the house, but by the time she walks in the schoolhouse door, she will be wearing something entirely different.

OTHER MAINTENANCE Teenaged daughters require one of two levels of maintenance: "High," and "Ultra High." Your daughter is "Ultra High." This means that whatever you do won't be enough and whatever you try won't work.

WARRANTY This product is not without defect because she has your genes, for heaven's sake. If you think this is not fair, talk to your parents, who think it is hilarious. Your teenaged daughter will remain a teenager for as long as it takes for her to become a woman, which in her opinion has already happened and as far as you are concerned never really will.

If you are dissatisfied with your teenaged daughter, well, what did you expect? In any event, your warranty does not give you your little girl back under any circumstances, except that deep down she's actually still there--you just have to look for her.

[*Pear*]

Is this the first time you meet the pirate?

I hope you have a great time. You'll have to keep us up to date.

[*Pear*]

Every year, English teachers from across the USA can submit their collections of actual analogies and metaphors found in high school essays. These excerpts are published each year to the amusement of teachers across the country. Here are last year's winners.

1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.

2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.

3. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.

4. She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli, and he was room-temperature Canadian beef.

5. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.

6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

7. He was as tall as a six-foot, three-inch tree.

8. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM machine.

9. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.

10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.

11. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30

12. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.

13. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.

14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.

15. They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth.

16. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

17. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant, and she was the East River.

18. Even in his last years, Granddad had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.

19. Shots rang out, as shots are won't to do.

20. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.

21. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.

22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.

23. The ballerina rose gracefully en Pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.

24. It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.

25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.

[*Pear*]

Hippie, hopefully you two will be like #4.

[hippiegirl]

Originally Posted by *Pear*

Hippie, hopefully you two will be like #4.

And he'll be like #17!

[hippiegirl]

I copied the me