Why the fascination with Kimmer? #11

[Tooter]

Originally Posted by MomToEli

Please note: I've never had ANY dealings with TT and only know of her through this thread and watching her on KTLA ....

I read a very insightful book not too long ago on forgiveness, and how each of us has our own "forgiveness language". If the offender doesn't offer their apology in our language, we don't accept it as a sincere apology. Quite an interesting read. It goes on to say that as the offender I have the responsibility to communicate in a way that is meaningful to the person I've offended.

But, what I really wanted to comment on in all of this is that forgiveness is not reconciliation. I totally understand where Christin is coming from and her forgiveness is very consistent with her core beliefs as a Christian. I support her fully in walking her talk.

Forgiveness has nothing to do with the offender, actually. It is about us stepping back and letting God do what He likes with the other person, and us getting on with our own stuff without being consumed with that other person.

Reconciliation, however, certainly requires repentance and restoration. And it may be that it is literally impossible to ever have the same relationship with someone as before. I know I'm there with my ex-best friend. I've forgiven her, and I'm still incredibly sad that we have no relationship anymore, but I simply can't subject myself to what she has done to me now twice ever again (or my children, for that matter).

That said, as a Christian I would not dare to believe that anyone is beyond being redeemed. Christ can and does change lives every single day. I only have to look at myself to see that (my offenses were different that TT's to be sure, but just as offensive to a Holy God). Rarely does that heart change alleviate consequences, though. If TT is found culpable in the Kimkins scam she should be held accountable as allowed under the law certainly, and I know if I find her on a board I'm posting on I will either leave or be incredibly leery. My weight loss issues are too important to me to knowingly expose myself to one known to be deceitful when it serves her purposes.

Ok ... I'll step off my soapbox and back into lurkdom now.

[Tooter]

Originally Posted by Dottie

I also think you can forgive someone but still not want to embrace them back into your life/circle/whatever. I believe TT falls into this catagory with many, many people... like "I forgive you, now go away". And that's not being mean, it's just being honest.

I so agree with this. It's taken me years to learn it, but very true.

I love the line... "I forgive you, now go away".

[Magicsmom]

Originally Posted by CarolynF

Hi everyone..

I just love it when people like Tanya post for the first time in a very long time. It proves that LCF has exposed the truth about Heidi and people are still reading and learning about this truth. It is just great!! (Welcome, Tanya).

I've read all the posts about TT..I think discussion is extremely healthy and we can agree to disagree on this. Everyone is at a different place with TT..Some have been very hurt,some have been kinda hurt, and some haven't been affected at all. So, we all have to respect each other's feelings, listen, and learn from their experiences. The truth for LCF's is that Tippy will never be allowed to post here again. So, that part is mute and unless some of us travel to other sites, we may never have contact with her again. It's our own personal choice.

Just because Tippy didn't hurt ME personally doesn't mean I don't care about my friends on this board whom she did hurt. Hugs go out to all of you. I can't tell you how to feel about this and I don't think it's my place to do that.

We are all here for each other focussed on telling the truth about Kimkins and getting people to eat healthy while losing weight...Group hug time..LOLOL

Carolyn, I feel like you really do get it! I am the only one who knows whether or not I forgave TT, and frankly it rubs me the wrong way when it's blown off as "venom" and "unforgiveness" when I try to tell people to watch out for her. You can forgive while still realizing the nature of the person who perpetrated the destruction. Wherever given the chance, she will play one end against the other and have people infighting. Whoever doesn't believe that is destined to learn it the hard way.

[Mayberryfan]

Tanya, Missi, et al.

I suspect most of us (and most overweight people) have some kind of abuse or neglect issue from their childhood that contributes to being overweight. I certainly do! It's hard to make the "child" part of your brain ever get over that kind of thing. For me, it was my parents constantly berating me for being chubby by telling me no one would like me if I were fat. My self-esteem was zilch which made me the perfect target for a child molester. So the whole forgiveness topic is one I'm familiar with, too. I actually have a very good relationship now with my parents. I could blame them for a lot that hasn't gone well in my life, but it would just bring me more pain. I truly don't believe they were trying to damage me, I just think they didn't have a freakin' clue what they were doing! (btw, I've found that doing things for other people is a great way to increase ones' self-esteem. I think I'm doing well in that dept. now! )

Now this may sound totally crazy, but I've wondered if I should be grateful to Heidi, in some respects. Hell, I'd probably never have found LCF if it weren't for her whole disaster-diet. Learning that she is a fraud made me more determined than ever to lose my weight. So, in some twisted way, she has actually helped me, even though it was totally unintentional on her part. I'll say this much, I can't be bothered to hate Heidi or Tippy or SL (whom I kinda feel sorry for). I just want justice to be done. In my opinion, that means prison for Heidi. Period!

And now, for something that's really been bothering me for the last couple of days: Bamagal said there are liberals in the south. WTH?! HOW did that happen???!!!

[Magicsmom]

Originally Posted by Mayberryfan

And now, for something that's really been bothering me for the last couple of days: Bamagal said there are liberals in the south. WTH?! HOW did that happen???!!!

Imported?

[susique333]

Originally Posted by ixtapacheryl

I love the group hug - can I squeeze in that little circle?

Here ya go Cheryl!

[Magicsmom]

Originally Posted by susique333

Here ya go Cheryl!

Awwwwwwww!!!!!!!!!!!! That looks like my boys! (even though there are only two of them, and they're all grown up)

[Kisal]

Originally Posted by missis36

Have you any idea what it's like to be told you were a mistake, you were a punishment, and you were a disgrace? I do. I was a fat kid because of it. My mother would take me to the mall and SCREAM at the top of her lungs that I was a fat little pig when I couldn't fit into the clothes she liked. If you thought for a moment that "Mommy dearest" was a bad movie, I'd like to invite all of you to hang with my mom for 10 minutes. You'd think Joan Crawford was a saint. This is a true story.

I just want you to know that you aren't alone in what you suffered. I was orphaned as a young child. My family died in an auto accident. I was the only survivor. I was sent to live with relatives, and all I ever heard was that my brother should have lived, and I should have been the one to die. No matter how hard I tried, nothing I did ever pleased those people. It's a terrible way to grow up. Your post brought back some terrible memories for me.

[Tooter]

Originally Posted by Mayberryfan

Tanya, Missi, et al.

I suspect most of us (and most overweight people) have some kind of abuse or neglect issue from their childhood that contributes to being overweight. I certainly do! It's hard to make the "child" part of your brain ever get over that kind of thing. For me, it was my parents constantly berating me for being chubby by telling me no one would like me if I were fat. My self-esteem was zilch which made me the perfect target for a child molester. So the whole forgiveness topic is one I'm familiar with, too. I actually have a very good relationship now with my parents. I could blame them for a lot that hasn't gone well in my life, but it would just bring me more pain. I truly don't believe they were trying to damage me, I just think they didn't have a freakin' clue what they were doing! (btw, I've found that doing things for other people is a great way to increase ones' self-esteem. I think I'm doing well in that dept. now! )

Now this may sound totally crazy, but I've wondered if I should be grateful to Heidi, in some respects. Hell, I'd probably never have found LCF if it weren't for her whole disaster-diet. Learning that she is a fraud made me more determined than ever to lose my weight. So, in some twisted way, she has actually helped me, even though it was totally unintentional on her part. I'll say this much, I can't be bothered to hate Heidi or Tippy or SL (whom I kinda feel sorry for). I just want justice to be done. In my opinion, that means prison for Heidi. Period!

And now, for something that's really been bothering me for the last couple of days: Bamagal said there are liberals in the south. WTH?! HOW did that happen???!!!

My Grandmother Always said "Good Comes out of Bad". It's true. The most important learning times of my life, I considered (at the time) as BAD times. Yep, they were hard, but where ever there is growth there is pain.

I think we all have, and still are, learning alot from these threads. Not just about Heidi, TT and scams, but about ourselves. I believe we all are "Growing". This is an awesome thread. It's amazing watching everyone pull together to get info, to share and to try so hard to get everyone to "understand" where we are coming from. This last part on forgiveness has been awesome to read and watch.

Liberals in the South?!?!

[MollyBrown]

Originally Posted by Mayberryfan

...And now, for something that's really been bothering me for the last couple of days: Bamagal said there are liberals in the south. WTH?! HOW did that happen???!!!

Here's another NEWSFLASH!!

There are conservatives on the West Coast!

[Magicsmom]

Originally Posted by MollyBrown

Here's another NEWSFLASH!!

There are conservatives on the West Coast!

And even in the Northwest!

[BamaGal]

Originally Posted by Mayberryfan

And now, for something that's really been bothering me for the last couple of days: Bamagal said there are liberals in the south. WTH?! HOW did that happen???!!!

you bet we're here----and we are multiplying!!!!

Originally Posted by Magicsmom

Imported?

nope born and bred right here in the heart of the heart of Dixie---


didn't always have these liberal views---I was right up there with all the other conservatives in my neck of the woods---because my family told me that's how things were---even grew up singing with a Southern Baptist gospel choir---now I follow an entirely different spiritual path.....

after years on my own--I finally grew a set and made my own decisions---

and through the power of the Internet---have found other like minded people right here in Bama country....



ETA:---on the Heidi front---wonder how things faired at her court date with the defaulted school loan go yesterday?????

[Mayberryfan]

Magic, Molly ~

Thank you! And, dittos

ETA: Bama, at least we can agree on a football team! (Roll Tide) I'm subbing for a friend tomorrow who is going to a coaching seminar hosted by none other than Nick Saban. I made him promise to get me an autograph!

Oh, and Honeybee...this guy I'm subbing for tomorrow, I'm hoping someday to get my testosterone injection from...lest you think I've turned into such a good little girl!

[Magicsmom]

Originally Posted by Kisal

I just want you to know that you aren't alone in what you suffered. I was orphaned as a young child. My family died in an auto accident. I was the only survivor. I was sent to live with relatives, and all I ever heard was that my brother should have lived, and I should have been the one to die. No matter how hard I tried, nothing I did ever pleased those people. It's a terrible way to grow up. Your post brought back some terrible memories for me.

Oh my, I'm so sorry about what you went through. It is hard to understand how people can treat children like that. I was always berated for being "chubby". You know, I have looked at pictures of myself as a child, and I just don't know where that came from. I have a brother who is just about two years older than I am. The first day they brought me home from the hospital, he said "I'm going to poke that baby's eyes out". My parents laughed it off, and they never dealt with his hostility that he was not the only child anymore. He was allowed to abuse me horribly, and my parents did nothing to stop it. He was the smart one, and I was the dumb one. Gah! So much more, but I won't go on. Isn't it interesting that I am the one taking care of Mom in her old age and my brother can't be bothered?

[Magicsmom]

Originally Posted by Mayberryfan

Magic, Molly ~

Thank you! And, dittos

[Magicsmom]

Originally Posted by BamaGal

ETA:---on the Heidi front---wonder how things faired at her court date with the defaulted school loan go yesterday?????

I forgot all about that!

[Princess Dieter]

Originally Posted by ixtapacheryl

.

I too had a pretty unhappy childhood (parents both drank and there was physical abuse). Now they are divorced - and not drinking anymore. My mother is single and my father remarried. I have tried to act like a loving daughter sending cards, calling him, etc. What I get back is really nothing - not even a card for my birthday. For the first time in my life - I decided this year I wasn't going to send any more cards - but I would call instead. Now when a birthday or a holiday rolls around and I don't get any attention from him I don't feel so hurt. It works for me! He's never complimented me or told me how proud he was regarding my career, etc., but I sure hear plenty about his step-son endlessly. Now I just let it go in one ear and out the other.

Wow. It's always so puzzling to me how parents can be this way. I mean, one's own kid. How can a person be this way to his or her own kids?

Cheryl, it's obvious from your posts on this board that you are a very good, big-hearted human being. I can't imagine why your dad wouldn't be proud of you. He should be.

And to all who've had mean or controlling or unloving parents: Hugs.

That sucks. They suck. Their loss, too.

I just don't get it.

[CarolynF]

Terry: Gosh...what a brother.....but you are doing a "good" thing, girl..

Did you see what yucky wrote:

Kimkins Exhausted

[MollyBrown]

Originally Posted by BamaGal

...you personally know that the proper authorities in CA that are in the foster children field KNOW all about this

there's no way in H*** they will ever approve of her having foster kids again...

I wish I could be so certain about that. So far, Heidi has not been convicted of any crime. And foster agencies can be desperate to place children.

Many years ago I knew a woman at work who took in 2 elementary-school aged foster sons. She had a teenage son and step-son of her own. Her husband had been in prison, though I do not know the nature of the crime.

Anyway, the step-son molested one of the foster boys. Multiple times.

You will not believe this. But they LEFT the foster children IN THE FOSTER HOME.

The woman lived in an upper middle class neighborhood with a swimming pool and a horse stable. I have no idea what the foster children's biological family and home were like. But I was incredulous that they were leaving those 2 boys in that foster home. The offending boy had to go for counseling.

So I am not at all convinced that Heidi will never foster again. I, too, thought as soon as I saw that 4 BR house, that being a foster-MILF (ewwwwwwwww) was possibly on her mind.

[CarolynF]

Well, I think that because of all the notoriety on tv in the area, and Corona newspaper, she will not be on the A list for foster mothers. So, that's another plus of the Fascination Thread and the investigation. Plus, others have called the Foster Care Agency and they
have been alerted of the situation. So, I doubt if she would get any "boys"..

[MollyBrown]

Originally Posted by BamaGal

didn't always have these liberal views---I was right up there with all the other conservatives in my neck of the woods---because my family told me that's how things were---even grew up singing with a Southern Baptist gospel choir---now I follow an entirely different spiritual path.....

after years on my own--I finally grew a set and made my own decisions---

and through the power of the Internet---have found other like minded people right here in Bama country....

How funny! My story is just the opposite. I was a lib for decades until I got older. I also am glad that the internet enables me to be in touch with like minds.

This does not mean that I swallow everything in the party line, not at all. Just that the issues I have given deep consideration to lead me in the conservative direction.

What a great country we live in, that each can have her own views and the freedom to express them openly. I love America!

We should probably get off the topic of politics, lol!