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Old 04-03-2014, 12:09 PM   #91
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Originally Posted by Yam-Yam View Post
Tammy: My DH is a mail saver too! I don't get why he saves all junk mail. And when he opens bills or correspondence, he saves the ripped open envelopes. Gosh! Can't you at least throw the old envelopes away?
That's funny. I don't even open most of the mail we get. DW looks at it and then recycles or shreds it.
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Old 04-03-2014, 12:11 PM   #92
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Tammy: My DH is a mail saver too! I don't get why he saves all junk mail. And when he opens bills or correspondence, he saves the ripped open envelopes. Gosh! Can't you at least throw the old envelopes away?
OMGosh! That's my dh!!! There are so many envelopes in our desk and most have absolutely nothing in them! Lol. He doesn't even put the letter, bill or whatever back in the envelope!!!!
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Old 04-03-2014, 12:14 PM   #93
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I'm the one who pays the bills and takes care of finances. Yet DH insists on being the one to pick up the mail and open it. Problem is, he will open a bill and put it in with his junk mail, junk paper pile and it won't see the light of day for months.

I have to have all bills on Internet bill pay to make sure nothing is late. He'll walk into a room and hand me a bill and say, "Oh, yeah. Here's an electricity bill I forgot to give you." it's from 5 months ago and it just surfaced in one of his piles.
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Old 04-03-2014, 12:16 PM   #94
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OMGosh! That's my dh!!! There are so many envelopes in our desk and most have absolutely nothing in them! Lol. He doesn't even put the letter, bill or whatever back in the envelope!!!!
Exactly! Our DHs must be twins separated at birth!
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Old 04-03-2014, 12:17 PM   #95
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Dawn, that was just perfect! Yes, that'll be me someday. And yes, the fellow who came to my rescue the other day was quite good-lookin'!

You guys are giving me family frugal flashbacks! I must remember to apologize to my mom, who I am always giving a hard time for her "saving" tendencies, but in reality, she doesn't even scratch the surface of what you guys are talking about. She was a depression kid, and she was also a teacher (you do know that teachers are required to save every little piece of anything that might come in handy for an art project, or to hold paint or chalk in, or be pasted together to form......something). Rooms filled to the brim though? Not even close.
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Old 04-03-2014, 12:22 PM   #96
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My hubby tends to get rid of everything that comes in the mail if it doesn't look familiar. He almost shredded a gift card and a check the other day as he didn't know who it was from. I tell him to be a little more curious!

Fortunately those items were saved, but who knows what has happened in the past. His desk is neat, though! He does sort it and gives me everything that is mine.
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Old 04-03-2014, 12:24 PM   #97
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Dawn, that was just perfect! Yes, that'll be me someday. And yes, the fellow who came to my rescue the other day was quite good-lookin'!

You guys are giving me family frugal flashbacks! I must remember to apologize to my mom, who I am always giving a hard time for her "saving" tendencies, but in reality, she doesn't even scratch the surface of what you guys are talking about. She was a depression kid, and she was also a teacher (you do know that teachers are required to save every little piece of anything that might come in handy for an art project, or to hold paint or chalk in, or be pasted together to form......something). Rooms filled to the brim though? Not even close.
MIL was a teacher too. Part of what's filling that room is teaching supplies "for the grandkids". Never mind that you couldn't even get to most of the stuff. Also, the grandkids are rapidly passing by that age (my kids are looooong past it).
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Old 04-03-2014, 12:53 PM   #98
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MIL was a teacher too. Part of what's filling that room is teaching supplies "for the grandkids". Never mind that you couldn't even get to most of the stuff. Also, the grandkids are rapidly passing by that age (my kids are looooong past it).
Ah yes! My mom's garage allows for 2 cars to be parked in it, but the perimeter is pretty much filled with teacher stuff (she retired almost 16 years ago!) No grandkids, but she always feels like someone could use this stuff. I've suggested we go through it and whatever is worthwhile she could list a garage giveaway on Craigslist, and people could come and take what they wanted. She has Xerox and mimeograph (yes, I said mimeograph - she was a teacher for a loooooong time) puzzles and coloring sheets galore. She seems reluctant. I think at this point it's not so much getting rid of it that bothers her, it's going through it.
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Old 04-03-2014, 01:16 PM   #99
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Carol: Maybe she could donate it to a school or a teacher.
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Old 04-03-2014, 01:25 PM   #100
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I know what you mean about the "going through it" part.

That's what I'm putting off in the closet of the room that used to be my office.

Yuck! I just don't want to do it! It is full of stuff I needed back when I worked. I just don't want to toss everything, because I know there are some things in there I want to save. But going through it box by box is time consuming.

When I'm really in the mood, I play what I call "the keep-toss game".

I put two empty containers on the floor and put the box full of papers and files on a tv tray. One container is TOSS the other is KEEP. This is phase one.

In a split second I must decide keep or toss. No second guessing.

When the box is empty, I dump the toss container contents in the garbage outside.

Then I put the KEEP box on the TV tray and the two empty containers on the floor are NOW and LATER. (The later is stuff that needs to be filed or stored, the NOW is stuff that needs immediate attention).

This way when I get done with the game, the only thing that goes back in the closet is the much smaller box of LATER stuff. The NOW stuff gets dealt with and mailed or tossed or sent where it belongs.
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Old 04-03-2014, 01:53 PM   #101
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My grandmother and mother were both teachers. Grandmother was a depression kid and kept EVERYTHING, though she kept it all neat and orderly, just way too much stuff (shopping bags, TV dinner trays, empty pill bottles, etc.). My mother kept everything, and was a classic hoarder, things piled to the ceilings with walkways through the house. We had mice and roaches and all manner or varmints in our home when I was growing up. It was pretty traumatic. They both had OCD, and hoarding is one of the symptoms. It seems obsessive/compulsives tend to be either compulsively messy or compulsively neat with no in-between.

I have hoarding tendencies and definite OCD tendencies, as does my daughter. I find my behaviors laughable sometimes, and know how unrealistic it is to want to keep everything, yet sometimes it's hard to throw things away, or give them away. I force myself to do it, but my house gets quite messy before I go through a "purge" cycle (never any critters in my house other than my dogs, and it's more clutter than anything), but I kind of waver between the two extremes. I let it get messy, then clean, clean, clean. There only seems to be a little bit of time when everything's "normal."

My house, right now, is neat and organized (mostly--we won't talk about Keira's room!), but my garage, which is too small for even one car, is full of boxed things from our last move. Some are antiques and I just won't part with them, but other boxes, I'm sure, are full of junk. I'm not quite up to tackling that just yet. I always say I need to move every few years because that's when I get rid of all the accumulated "stuff."
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Old 04-03-2014, 02:00 PM   #102
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So interesting about the OCD being either all the way one way or the other. I'm a classic purger, I love going through stuff and getting rid of what I don't need. It feels cleansing to me. Mostly, there's not a lot to go through, because I do a lot of purge-as-I-go. But paperwork does build up sometimes. I just recently went through all my personal files and have a stack of stuff to shred, and it feels so good to have emptied some space in my file cabinet.

I've thought I should try and be a professional organizer, but I don't think I'm patient enough to deal with people dithering about whether to keep or let go. I can't even get my own mother to let me help her! Plus, I usually just say "throw it away." I know that doesn't work for everyone though.

There have been a few times in my life when I've thought "I never should have gotten rid of that" but not enough to make me change my ways.
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Old 04-03-2014, 04:20 PM   #103
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So interesting about the OCD being either all the way one way or the other. I'm a classic purger, I love going through stuff and getting rid of what I don't need. It feels cleansing to me. Mostly, there's not a lot to go through, because I do a lot of purge-as-I-go. But paperwork does build up sometimes. I just recently went through all my personal files and have a stack of stuff to shred, and it feels so good to have emptied some space in my file cabinet.

I've thought I should try and be a professional organizer, but I don't think I'm patient enough to deal with people dithering about whether to keep or let go. I can't even get my own mother to let me help her! Plus, I usually just say "throw it away." I know that doesn't work for everyone though.

There have been a few times in my life when I've thought "I never should have gotten rid of that" but not enough to make me change my ways.

I could have written this! I do cleaning and organizing for people but they have to be ready mentally for purging. It is very emotional for those who "collect".
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Old 04-03-2014, 04:27 PM   #104
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I had a cyst removed from my neck yesterday. It was benign and had been there for over 4 years. I finally decided, for cosmetic reasons mostly, to have it removed. I always keep my hair long enough to cover it, and when I wear my hair up, I try to wear a collared shirt lol. It was only about the size of a pea and looked like a flesh-colored mole, but was embarrassing to me. Probably no one else ever noticed it. Now it's a hole and extremely noticeable. I hope it heals well...and that I didn't make it worse than it was!

Maybe it was distracting from the turkey neck I've developed since losing weight.
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Old 04-03-2014, 04:29 PM   #105
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I had a cyst removed from my neck yesterday. It was benign and had been there for over 4 years. I finally decided, for cosmetic reasons mostly, to have it removed. I always keep my hair long enough to cover it, and when I wear my hair up, I try to wear a collared shirt lol. It was only about the size of a pea and looked like a mole, but was embarrassing to me. Probably no one else ever noticed it. Now it's a hole and extremely noticeable. I hope it heals well...and that I didn't make it worse than it was!
I'm sure nobody else ever even noticed it, and they won't notice when it's healed either. I'm loving my eyeliner and brows and that was a totally vain purchase. Touch-up scheduled for tomorrow, so I'll have another week or two of yuck before I'm beautiful again.
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Old 04-03-2014, 04:41 PM   #106
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As if!! You're beautiful now, and were before, so that is established. I hope it goes well, and I'm sure it will. One reason I decided to go ahead and have the cyst removed is because I'm considering getting my hair cut short (as I mentioned before). Everything has to be perfect!
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Old 04-03-2014, 04:48 PM   #107
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Look who's talking with that gorgeous blond that I could NEVER pull off! I can't wait to see your new haircut, if and when you get it.
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Old 04-03-2014, 05:04 PM   #108
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Cindy: You are so beautiful and have gorgeous hair. I'll bet you will love it shorter and you will look so cute too. Glad you decided to have that cyst removed. I have one on my upper right arm and have been thinking about getting that removed. It's annoying!

Dawn: You just clarified something for me! I sometimes watch "Hoarders" with my grand daughter and we have both wondered about the experts. They will say "I'm an OCD psychologist specializing in hoarding." We scratch our heads and say "How can you have OCD and be a hoarder?"

We always thought people with OCD are neat freaks. Kinda like my 35 year old son. He started color coding the clothes in his closet and keeping his room pristine when he was 3 years old!!!!! Now he is that way in his home and drives his beautiful wife crazy sometimes being a neat nick. When we stay with them he organizes our suitcases.

Anyway. Interesting topic!

I used to be a perfectionist. I couldn't go to bed at night until my house was perfectly neat and clean. Which often meant I didn't go to bed until the wee hours of the morning. I used to vacuum at 2 am because no one was in my way until my family put a stop to it because the vacuum cleaner noise would wake them up!

Thankfully, I gave up my perfectionism, very deliberately in recent years and my DH is soooooo much happier. He loves, loves, loves clutter.
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Old 04-03-2014, 05:20 PM   #109
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Thanks Dawn and Yam Yam.

As for OCD, I've never been but I have worried myself to death over my messy house...lately I've been thinking that life is really too short to spend the weekends cleaning and working in the yard (if it is a chore to you, and not something you enjoy), and striving for perfection. Who's really going to care? I haven't abandoned all cleaning lol, but I am trying not to be too concerned that my house is not (or far from) perfect.
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Old 04-03-2014, 05:47 PM   #110
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life is really too short to spend the weekends cleaning and working in the yard
I'm environmentally friendly and leave my yard as close to natural as I can and don't waste water on it or pollute the groundwater with fertilizers and stuff like that.




That's actually less a lack of OCD and more of an abundance of laziness.
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Old 04-03-2014, 06:27 PM   #111
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I'm going to have to rent Frozen. I don't know if my 2 1/2 yo granddaughter will sit and watch it though. It really has to keep her attention.

My dd is going pretty well. I bought a Vanilla lean protein (meal replacement) shake mix at GNC yesterday. It's pretty good. I was wondering how I could change the flavor of it sometimes without adding calories.
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Torani's or DaVinci's sugar free syrups or Mio drops. I use them a lot in shakes.
Exactly what Dawn said.

My mother has terrible OCD. The cleaning type. Also pretty traumatizing in its own way. We could not sit on any furniture in "outside clothes" so when we came home from school we had to either undress in the garage or sit on the floor. Obviously there was no carpet. All hard wood floors. At 17 years old I came home from school and sat on the floor doing homework. We could not touch any appliance. No touching the stove, microwave, refrigerator, washing machine, dryer, etc. I could not get my own glass of ice water or do my own laundry when I wanted something washed. If we took an item out of the closet it could not go back in.

I followed absolutely every crazy rule my mother had. My sister broke everyone and caused my mom to cry in her room. DW is very good about observing the rules when we go to visit, but visits have been really short- like 3 hours tops.

Now they moved to Florida and my sister has been to visit 3 times. Us- 0.

It's too stressful to follow all those rules for 2-3 days and we can't really afford to fly there and then stay in a hotel for 3 days very often. We are going in November and are -planning- to stay for 2 days. We may chicken out, but it will be one year of not seeing my mom and dad at that point. It makes me sad, but I just can't focus on it...
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Old 04-03-2014, 09:42 PM   #112
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I've yet to see it but lots of people have very positive things to say about it (including Yennie, I don't know if that's particularly obvious tho' ).
Huh, was I not clear enough? What part? The watching it online daily through the pirated website? The waiting in line 3 hours so the kiddo could meet the princesses? The incessant watching of the songs on YouTube? I apologize for my lack of clarity in my communications...I will try to do better.

Been on an epic fence building binge here. I'm happy to finally report that the finishing touches are done, and the project is done. So done, in fact, we've sent the tractor home with grampa. It was nice to have but I'm glad the project is done with. And my electric fence is, well, electric. Both steers and the redheaded stepchild (aka the really expensive, but really broken-therefore-unridable glorified pasture ornament) tested it out for me. <very big evil grin> There will be NO fence climbing this summer!!

In related news (related in that its horse related), the redheaded stepchild's replacement, the other red mare, continues to be most excellent and was entered into her first show today. Its a schooling event but will be our first outing off property together. The plan right now is for me to show her in a walk/trot and my trainer in a walk/trot/canter. We work on the canter at home but since she's off the track, when she panics and her brain short circuits, her go-to mode is "RACE!!!!!" We figured the trainer was better equipped to deal with that if she does it in public, just to be safe. I think she'll be fine and we reserve the right to change our minds but that's the plan right now.

And I've been browsing baby-daddies for the broken red mare. Not planning on knocking her up until next year but I'm a little OCD when it comes to the 4-leggeds so I want to know who, when, where, what and how. Well, I kinda got the what and how part down mostly focusing on the who...
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Old 04-04-2014, 04:13 AM   #113
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Exactly what Dawn said.

My mother has terrible OCD. The cleaning type. Also pretty traumatizing in its own way. We could not sit on any furniture in "outside clothes" so when we came home from school we had to either undress in the garage or sit on the floor. Obviously there was no carpet. All hard wood floors. At 17 years old I came home from school and sat on the floor doing homework. We could not touch any appliance. No touching the stove, microwave, refrigerator, washing machine, dryer, etc. I could not get my own glass of ice water or do my own laundry when I wanted something washed. If we took an item out of the closet it could not go back in.

I followed absolutely every crazy rule my mother had. My sister broke everyone and caused my mom to cry in her room. DW is very good about observing the rules when we go to visit, but visits have been really short- like 3 hours tops.

Now they moved to Florida and my sister has been to visit 3 times. Us- 0.

It's too stressful to follow all those rules for 2-3 days and we can't really afford to fly there and then stay in a hotel for 3 days very often. We are going in November and are -planning- to stay for 2 days. We may chicken out, but it will be one year of not seeing my mom and dad at that point. It makes me sad, but I just can't focus on it...
That sounds heart breaking. I hate that you went through that. It's just amazing what people go through, and recover from.
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Old 04-04-2014, 04:18 AM   #114
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I'm environmentally friendly and leave my yard as close to natural as I can and don't waste water on it or pollute the groundwater with fertilizers and stuff like that.




That's actually less a lack of OCD and more of an abundance of laziness.
I just try and keep up with the grass and weeds, and that's too much lol. I need a condo or patio home. If it weren't for neighbors on my a$$, I would do it.
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Old 04-04-2014, 05:02 AM   #115
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Originally Posted by Librarygirl View Post
That sounds heart breaking. I hate that you went through that. It's just amazing what people go through, and recover from.
At this point in my life I think it's sadder for my parents. My mother and father keeping asking when DW and I are coming. They know that it's hard for us to conform to all the rules, but I have my own OCD things so I know my mom can't just put those things to the side for 3 days.
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Old 04-04-2014, 05:04 AM   #116
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Hi everyone! I know I've been MIA but I've been battling a terrible flu. Finally getting over that hump, but now something completely horrific has occurred. My 16 year old nephew was shot and killed last night. There's so much surrounding that situation, but my family is strong and we make it through that. I will check in later. Back to work for a few hours at least then heading to CT tonight to be with my siblings.
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Old 04-04-2014, 05:37 AM   #117
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Originally Posted by LiLi914 View Post
My 16 year old nephew was shot and killed last night. There's so much surrounding that situation, but my family is strong and we make it through that. I will check in later. Back to work for a few hours at least then heading to CT tonight to be with my siblings.
Oh good grief. My heart is with you and your loved ones at this shocking news.
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Old 04-04-2014, 05:48 AM   #118
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LiLi914 View Post
Hi everyone! I know I've been MIA but I've been battling a terrible flu. Finally getting over that hump, but now something completely horrific has occurred. My 16 year old nephew was shot and killed last night. There's so much surrounding that situation, but my family is strong and we make it through that. I will check in later. Back to work for a few hours at least then heading to CT tonight to be with my siblings.
Oh no!! I can't imagine what you and your family must be going through. My thoughts are with you.
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Old 04-04-2014, 05:58 AM   #119
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Lisa, I'm thinking about you today. I am so sorry your family is dealing with this and hope you can all pull together regardless of the circumstances surrounding the shooting. Love and hugs.
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Old 04-04-2014, 06:24 AM   #120
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That’s terrible, Lisa! Sending more virtual hugs
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